Was this an out of line question?

1235

Replies

  • elphie754
    elphie754 Posts: 7,574 Member
    RiseHigher wrote: »
    elphie754 wrote: »
    I am sorry but I see a lot of excuses and blaming everything on something (TOM, SAD etc). You are a grown up. Take responsibilities for your actions and stop finding excuses.

    Pbbbfffft. Do I look like I make excuses. Nope. I gain water weight with my TOM. I gain weight when I get hungry with SAD. Not blaming it just it what it is. I'm 5 or so lbs over where I was. Not 50 or 100. LOL. You can go flame another thread now, bye....
    rainbowbow wrote: »
    I just want to know if it's normal to leave an open jar of jam at room temperature all day and then store it in the pantry. :s

    No. Ick

    Fine. Any other opinions on the storage of jam - feel free to take it up with my Mom then... happy? Haha. Bye!

    Yes. Those are all excuses.
  • Therealobi1
    Therealobi1 Posts: 3,262 Member
    elphie754 wrote: »
    I am sorry but I see a lot of excuses and blaming everything on something (TOM, SAD etc). You are a grown up. Take responsibilities for your actions and stop finding excuses.

    If only being a grown up did the trick. Would be a lot less obesity. Eating disorders plus less crime in the world.
    What steps did you use to overcome your overeating or did it vanish overnight
  • MelodyandBarbells
    MelodyandBarbells Posts: 7,724 Member
    elphie754 wrote: »
    I am sorry but I see a lot of excuses and blaming everything on something (TOM, SAD etc). You are a grown up. Take responsibilities for your actions and stop finding excuses.

    If only being a grown up did the trick. Would be a lot less obesity. Eating disorders plus less crime in the world.
    What steps did you use to overcome your overeating or did it vanish overnight

    Well, personally I'd love to adopt excuses that leave me weighing 126 lbs! Except for the marathon running. And the disciplined diet. Actually, could I just weigh 126 lbs with no work put in whatsoever, please???
  • MelodyandBarbells
    MelodyandBarbells Posts: 7,724 Member
    FYI @RiseHigher , one thing I find interesting is your Mom was simply thinking about your question, not getting upset. I'm sometimes asked, "you're not saying anything. You're angry, aren't you?" It's like, people actually think it's weird when you pause for a minute to think about what someone else has said!! :D Just found that interesting
  • blkandwhite77
    blkandwhite77 Posts: 281 Member
    My dad keeps a bowl full of skittles on a shelf in his house. I don't know who gets more excited about going in, getting hugs and hellos, and heading straight to he jar of skittle. Me or my children. 10 skittles they know the rule (my rule not my parents) we all count out 10 skittles. Yum yum yum.

    Couldn't live with my parents. Love them dearly but love them from our 5 miles apart distance lol jam could easily become an issue if we lived together. We'd get on each other's nerves awful darn quickly. We all like our homes our way, dishes done our way, beds made (or unmade) our way.

    I think it's probably just the stress of co living. It makes you edgy. Good luck and remember you're blessed to have her. May be more blessed from across town :D
  • RiseHigher
    RiseHigher Posts: 64 Member
    WinoGelato wrote: »
    I can't believe this many responses and no one bothered to ask what kinds of jam!?

    Yes! Orange marmalade, blackberry jam, raspberry jelly, and real Amish apple butter!!! In the fridge there is mint jelly and jalapeño jelly as well! Yum!
  • pipmcgrath
    pipmcgrath Posts: 26 Member
    I don't think it a big deal at all, its jam at the end of the day. Its not like its banned! You just asked her to keep it elsewhere. To the person who said just say no to it. If it was as easy as that there would be nobody struggling with weight issues in the world!
  • FatMoojor
    FatMoojor Posts: 483 Member
    Seriously, it's your mum. Just ask her. Explain you have zero willpower when it comes to the jam when you are feeling down.
    Any normal parent will help out their children.
  • RiseHigher
    RiseHigher Posts: 64 Member
    edited November 2015
    mccindy72 wrote: »
    WinoGelato wrote: »
    I can't believe this many responses and no one bothered to ask what kinds of jam!?

    I feel bad for the biscuits. No one cares about the biscuits. is there a recipe we can have?

    Sure! This is from my "recipe box" here on MyFitnessPal that I use for tracking, but I don't know how to officially share the recipe, so here it is:

    2 1/4 cup(s) Flour
    1 tbsp(s), Baking Powder
    1 tsp(s), Salt, table
    1/3 cup(s), Coconut Oil
    1 cup(s), Water
    2 Tbs, Nonfat Dry Milk

    Directions:
    1. Combine the flour, salt and baking powder in mixing bowl, cut in the oil.
    2. Beat egg and water with fork and mix with dry ingredients.
    3. Mix lightly then turn onto a well-floured surface. The dough will be moist so you will have to sprinkle with a little flour. Knead 20 times.
    4. Roll to 3/4 in thick. Cut with biscuit cutter and place on Silpad on baking sheet so they are touching each other.
    5. Bake at 450 degrees in preheated oven for 14 minutes.
    6. Remove from oven and let cool 5 minutes then place on cooling rack.

    She used to make 9-10 out of them, but the calories were a bit high so now she makes 14 and they come out about the size of what I remember the pop n' serve biscuits that you buy at the store are, which I think is appropriate for a snack.

    The original recipe had some sugar but she removed it to make it healthier.

    127 calories/6 grams fat/16 grams carbs/1 gram sugar/3 grams protein.

    I consider this an occasional treat, like a cookie or similar. I like to cut it in half, and eat it with orange marmalade and a veggie mozzarella cheese slice melted on top! Delish!

    She also bakes fresh breads every other day or so, but I'm not a big bread eater. I don't avoid it it's just not my preference.

    As an aside, she didn't have a oven for the first couple of years she lived in this house, as the one that came with the house didn't work (she was in an old house that the city demolished for a new development, so she got this one basically in exchange). I recently installed a wall oven for her as part of the remodel, so I think part of the reason she likes to make the biscuits etc is because it's in the oven that I put in for her. Plus, we both enjoy eating them! LOL!
  • Soopatt
    Soopatt Posts: 563 Member
    A serious athlete like the OP measures her intake on a different bar to the rest of us and I feel a little more allowance needs to be made for that. If she did not, she would not be competitive. There is a difference between wanting to be lean for a race and not minding being a bit soft around the middle as long we look good in clothes, which is the aim of most people.

    I think we are a little quick around here to accuse folks of having issues with food when they are on the cutting edge. We are fine with chubby people being pedantic (and way more so than this), but when someone wants to stay in superb condition we encourage them to eat more jam and biscuits? Would you tell someone with half their weight still to lose to eat more jam? Would you encourage them to sabotage their efforts? What is it about someone who is thin and super lean and wanting to stay that way which is bothersome to some posters here?

    Seems like skinny fit shaming or something. Luckily, the OP is having none of it.
  • RiseHigher
    RiseHigher Posts: 64 Member
    SLLRunner wrote: »
    mccindy72 wrote: »
    WinoGelato wrote: »
    I can't believe this many responses and no one bothered to ask what kinds of jam!?

    I feel bad for the biscuits. No one cares about the biscuits. is there a recipe we can have?

    Well, I for one love biscuits and jam. My mother, who has been deceased since I was 23, made the best homemade biscuits and strawberry jam. I miss her, and those wonderful treats of hers.

    @RiseHigher, this is just an observation, but I dont think this is actually about the biscuits and jam. In your last post you mention a 5 pound weight gain with TOM. That is normal and nothing to worry about, it's just water weight. It seems to me you might actually be afraid of weight gain, which indicates deeper isdues. It takes time to work through these issues.

    No, I had a 5 lb weight gain since the SAD snuck up on me this year and now it's approaching my TOM too. I posted that I check my AVERAGE weight over time so I know exactly where it's going and coming from. But it's getting better each day with my light therapy and I've already started losing it, so not a big deal.

    Don't really have "deeper" issues more than the next person, my concern is athletic performance and health, over some sort of fear............

    And yes one of the reasons I like being in this area and with my Mom is because I appreciate being close to my family a lot more after my Dad died. It makes you realize how short time can be, because when someone is gone, they are really gone............
  • RiseHigher
    RiseHigher Posts: 64 Member
    JaneiR36 wrote: »
    elphie754 wrote: »
    I am sorry but I see a lot of excuses and blaming everything on something (TOM, SAD etc). You are a grown up. Take responsibilities for your actions and stop finding excuses.

    If only being a grown up did the trick. Would be a lot less obesity. Eating disorders plus less crime in the world.
    What steps did you use to overcome your overeating or did it vanish overnight

    Well, personally I'd love to adopt excuses that leave me weighing 126 lbs! Except for the marathon running. And the disciplined diet. Actually, could I just weigh 126 lbs with no work put in whatsoever, please???

    I know right @JaneiR36 ?? LMAO! I work my butt off (literaly?!?!) to be in the shape that I am! And it's not as easy at 42 as it was at 22 LOL! (But its not too bad either...) Fortunately though, I LOVE what I do in fitness and health! That's one tipoff for me that the SAD is getting bad though. Some of the symptoms like fatigue can be written off to other things, working out too hard or whatever. But if my eating starts getting 'kooky' and my motivation for exercise starts slipping - that is NOT normal to me and I know I need to do light therapy, watch the sugars and other measures to get things back in hand!
    JaneiR36 wrote: »
    FYI @RiseHigher , one thing I find interesting is your Mom was simply thinking about your question, not getting upset. I'm sometimes asked, "you're not saying anything. You're angry, aren't you?" It's like, people actually think it's weird when you pause for a minute to think about what someone else has said!! :D Just found that interesting

    Yes! I wasn't having a great night coming off caffeine and I think that's why jumped the gun and thought that too. But I have been asked that too, when just thinking about an answer - and by my Mom too hah!

    BTW I feel great now off caffeine though! Wow!
  • glitzy196
    glitzy196 Posts: 190 Member
    SLLRunner wrote: »
    Athijade wrote: »
    Yes it was a bit out of line in my opinion. It is her home. Plus, you will deal with temptation day in and day out. Honestly, when you are staying in the home of another person, you don't ask that sort of thing and you just deal with it.

    I agree.

    OP, temptations are all around you. While you choose not to have tempting foods in you house, you must allow mom to have the food wherever she chooses in her home. This is a good way to strengthen your willpower. :)

    By the way, I used to do the same things-not have tempting food in my house and expect others to bend to my needs to not have tempting food around me. I strengthened my willpower by learning to just walk by the temptation while realizing it's all just food and I can choose to eat or not, and then I learned to eat all those same foods in moderation. It's been very freeing for me to just allow others to deal with food as they choose.

    I think it is jard not to look at this without your own bias. At my own moms house, i would have put it up without asking, and i can't imagine even having to explain myself, and if one of my children asked me to do it, i would think nothing of it. Family helps each other. I didn't ask her to never buy it again..
  • RiseHigher
    RiseHigher Posts: 64 Member
    glitzy196 wrote: »
    SLLRunner wrote: »
    Yes it was a bit out of line in my opinion. It is her home. Plus, you will deal with temptation day in and day out. Honestly, when you are staying in the home of another person, you don't ask that sort of thing and you just deal with it.

    I agree.

    OP, temptations are all around you. While you choose not to have tempting foods in you house, you must allow mom to have the food wherever she chooses in her home. This is a good way to strengthen your willpower. :)

    By the way, I used to do the same things-not have tempting food in my house and expect others to bend to my needs to not have tempting food around me. I strengthened my willpower by learning to just walk by the temptation while realizing it's all just food and I can choose to eat or not, and then I learned to eat all those same foods in moderation. It's been very freeing for me to just allow others to deal with food as they choose.

    Here's the other thing that I'll say, if just to bring more awareness of what exactly Seasonal Affective Disorder is. The strong cravings I was referring to are caused by a MEDICAL condition, which also causes other symptoms, namely, low motivation, not caring about things you normally care about, low energy and depression. Obviously comparing that to "willpower" to someone in a normal situation is not correct. And, this only happens in some regions at certain parts of the year. You've probably never had depression, and I would never wish it on anyone, but even that alone does not make you behave as you normally would.

    No one has to talk to me about "Willpower", because frankly, "willpower" is why I look the way I do, finish in the top 3 out of thousands of other runners, get up before dawn to run 11-26 miles in any type of weather, say "no" to unhealthy foods that many others say "yes" to, even when I know I exercise a lot more as well, just to ensure my engine has clean fuel powering it. Without "willpower" I wouldn't be near where I am today.

    And on the flip side, if I ask myself if someone with diabetes or even just dieting was staying with me and asked me to move sugary foods out of sight, would I do it? Heck yeah. Never mind just a jar of jam LOL. And they wouldn't even have to be family. If you were a smoker and one of your kids came to your house and was allergic to cigarette smoke, would you puff it out in front of them and say, "TOO BAD, MY HOUSE..." LMAO

    Guess it makes me appreciate how my Mom is even more.

    And btw, on that note I must be doing something right because one of my former roommates lost 55 lbs and another lost 80+ lbs separately after living with me, too (I am also a certified running coach and a former personal trainer). So question my methods if you must, but........ I'll just keep LOL'ing ......
  • mccindy72
    mccindy72 Posts: 7,001 Member
    RiseHigher wrote: »
    glitzy196 wrote: »
    SLLRunner wrote: »
    Yes it was a bit out of line in my opinion. It is her home. Plus, you will deal with temptation day in and day out. Honestly, when you are staying in the home of another person, you don't ask that sort of thing and you just deal with it.

    I agree.

    OP, temptations are all around you. While you choose not to have tempting foods in you house, you must allow mom to have the food wherever she chooses in her home. This is a good way to strengthen your willpower. :)

    By the way, I used to do the same things-not have tempting food in my house and expect others to bend to my needs to not have tempting food around me. I strengthened my willpower by learning to just walk by the temptation while realizing it's all just food and I can choose to eat or not, and then I learned to eat all those same foods in moderation. It's been very freeing for me to just allow others to deal with food as they choose.

    Here's the other thing that I'll say, if just to bring more awareness of what exactly Seasonal Affective Disorder is. The strong cravings I was referring to are caused by a MEDICAL condition, which also causes other symptoms, namely, low motivation, not caring about things you normally care about, low energy and depression. Obviously comparing that to "willpower" to someone in a normal situation is not correct. And, this only happens in some regions at certain parts of the year. You've probably never had depression, and I would never wish it on anyone, but even that alone does not make you behave as you normally would.

    No one has to talk to me about "Willpower", because frankly, "willpower" is why I look the way I do, finish in the top 3 out of thousands of other runners, get up before dawn to run 11-26 miles in any type of weather, say "no" to unhealthy foods that many others say "yes" to, even when I know I exercise a lot more as well, just to ensure my engine has clean fuel powering it. Without "willpower" I wouldn't be near where I am today.

    And on the flip side, if I ask myself if someone with diabetes or even just dieting was staying with me and asked me to move sugary foods out of sight, would I do it? Heck yeah. Never mind just a jar of jam LOL. And they wouldn't even have to be family. If you were a smoker and one of your kids came to your house and was allergic to cigarette smoke, would you puff it out in front of them and say, "TOO BAD, MY HOUSE..." LMAO

    Guess it makes me appreciate how my Mom is even more.

    And btw, on that note I must be doing something right because one of my former roommates lost 55 lbs and another lost 80+ lbs separately after living with me, too (I am also a certified running coach and a former personal trainer). So question my methods if you must, but........ I'll just keep LOL'ing ......

    The only thing that frightens me in your post is that you mention being a personal trainer, which means that you coach other people. And in another part of your post, you are labeling some foods as unhealthy.
    No foods are unhealthy. The only thing that would be unhealthy would be the quantity of them that would be consumed. As a coach (and as someone who is into personal fitness) part of what you are focusing on should be a good attitude toward food.
  • DKLI
    DKLI Posts: 63 Member
    edited November 2015
    I know if it was me, even if the jam was "put away", if I truly wanted it I'd know exactly where to find it. Out of sight isn't always out of mind. :)
  • dolliesdaughter
    dolliesdaughter Posts: 544 Member
    Move
  • susiejof
    susiejof Posts: 201 Member
    My mom, who is now 91, has gotten increasingly "rigid", about her routines as she has aged. About 6 years ago my sister was slated to move in with her, so that she could "age in place" in her own home, with some assistance from sis and myself. Well, that never worked out! My sister was moving out of her own house (with lots of stuff) and my mom felt sis could compress her belongings and activities into a one room outbuilding on her property. She was totally unwilling to cede her spare bedroom to my sister, let alone change how she displayed items on her kitchen counter. I don't think that would have been an issue for them in the past!
  • butterfli7o
    butterfli7o Posts: 1,319 Member
    If my daughter asked me to please put the jam away and gave me her reasons, I honestly wouldn't think twice. But, I don't know the relationship with your mom and if there is other issues...
  • glitzy196
    glitzy196 Posts: 190 Member
    If my daughter asked me to please put the jam away and gave me her reasons, I honestly wouldn't think twice. But, I don't know the relationship with your mom and if there is other issues...

    I have spent way too much time thinking about this question today, and I know all family dynamics are different, but I just cannot fathom 1. my mom caring one tiny little bit, especially since I was doing it for health reasons as opposed to..please move the Jelly to my night stand since I am now too fat to even walk to it..or 2. Me ever denying a request like that from my daughter, she is only 3, but I assure you even at 3 her hourly requests are not that simple. I would love for her to just say say "hey, move the Jam" and I would be all like "done" Instead she asks for crap like "do you think we could tie bananas in the tree, and then can we get a baby monkey? Not from the zoo..but like the woods.."Please just let me move the Jam.
  • azulvioleta6
    azulvioleta6 Posts: 4,195 Member
    elphie754 wrote: »
    RiseHigher wrote: »
    elphie754 wrote: »
    I am sorry but I see a lot of excuses and blaming everything on something (TOM, SAD etc). You are a grown up. Take responsibilities for your actions and stop finding excuses.

    Pbbbfffft. Do I look like I make excuses. Nope. I gain water weight with my TOM. I gain weight when I get hungry with SAD. Not blaming it just it what it is. I'm 5 or so lbs over where I was. Not 50 or 100. LOL. You can go flame another thread now, bye....
    rainbowbow wrote: »
    I just want to know if it's normal to leave an open jar of jam at room temperature all day and then store it in the pantry. :s

    No. Ick

    Fine. Any other opinions on the storage of jam - feel free to take it up with my Mom then... happy? Haha. Bye!

    Yes. Those are all excuses.

    Definitely excuses.

    By the way, you might want to be careful about referring to SAD as a serious illness. It's pretty offensive to those of us who actually have life-threatening illnesses.

    I had years of fighting SAD--I would call it a minor challenge rather than a serious illness.

    Is your body fat measure coming from your scale? It seems inaccurate. You might want to consider a BodPod or other more scientific measurement.
  • Dnarules
    Dnarules Posts: 2,081 Member
    elphie754 wrote: »
    RiseHigher wrote: »
    elphie754 wrote: »
    I am sorry but I see a lot of excuses and blaming everything on something (TOM, SAD etc). You are a grown up. Take responsibilities for your actions and stop finding excuses.

    Pbbbfffft. Do I look like I make excuses. Nope. I gain water weight with my TOM. I gain weight when I get hungry with SAD. Not blaming it just it what it is. I'm 5 or so lbs over where I was. Not 50 or 100. LOL. You can go flame another thread now, bye....
    rainbowbow wrote: »
    I just want to know if it's normal to leave an open jar of jam at room temperature all day and then store it in the pantry. :s

    No. Ick

    Fine. Any other opinions on the storage of jam - feel free to take it up with my Mom then... happy? Haha. Bye!

    Yes. Those are all excuses.

    Definitely excuses.

    By the way, you might want to be careful about referring to SAD as a serious illness. It's pretty offensive to those of us who actually have life-threatening illnesses.

    I had years of fighting SAD--I would call it a minor challenge rather than a serious illness.

    Is your body fat measure coming from your scale? It seems inaccurate. You might want to consider a BodPod or other more scientific measurement.

    Extreme cases of SAD can lead to suicide and other issues, so I don't think it is wrong to say it can be serious.

    Also, and I am not saying this meanly, but I really don't understand why some believe she is giving an excuse. She knows the reason why her weight went up, and is working towards correcting it, including changing her environment so that she is less tempted.

  • vespiquenn
    vespiquenn Posts: 1,455 Member
    RiseHigher wrote: »
    WinoGelato wrote: »
    I can't believe this many responses and no one bothered to ask what kinds of jam!?

    Yes! Orange marmalade, blackberry jam, raspberry jelly, and real Amish apple butter!!! In the fridge there is mint jelly and jalapeño jelly as well! Yum!


    Good lord, I now can see why self-control may be an issue here. I'd be taking all the orange marmalade and hiding in a closet.
  • KimberlyinMN
    KimberlyinMN Posts: 302 Member
    I don't think asking the request is out of line, provided that it was approached as a "Would it be okay if..." or some other way of politely asking. However, since it is her home, her reply is the final answer. Although if someone were staying with me and requested this, I'd comply. Even if it is to just put it on the microwave so it is out of sight - but easy enough to get to by anyone who wants it.
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 18,205 Member
    I have to say, my folks leave everything out on the counter. Seriously, it's like their pantry is on the counter. It drives me daft because I'm someone who puts even the appliances (toaster etc) away when they aren't in use and keeps my counters clear. So I'm stuck with the temptation to tidy it all away.
  • robertw486
    robertw486 Posts: 2,399 Member
    I don't think the question was at all out of line. Most wouldn't have even asked that question in a family members home probably. I wouldn't think twice if my daughter made such a request, I'd probably ask why she didn't just move it without asking!


    As for all the judgement being made about something so simple, I do think those are out of line.
  • RiseHigher
    RiseHigher Posts: 64 Member
    edited November 2015
    Dnarules wrote: »
    elphie754 wrote: »
    RiseHigher wrote: »
    elphie754 wrote: »
    I am sorry but I see a lot of excuses and blaming everything on something (TOM, SAD etc). You are a grown up. Take responsibilities for your actions and stop finding excuses.

    Pbbbfffft. Do I look like I make excuses. Nope. I gain water weight with my TOM. I gain weight when I get hungry with SAD. Not blaming it just it what it is. I'm 5 or so lbs over where I was. Not 50 or 100. LOL. You can go flame another thread now, bye....
    rainbowbow wrote: »
    I just want to know if it's normal to leave an open jar of jam at room temperature all day and then store it in the pantry. :s

    No. Ick

    Fine. Any other opinions on the storage of jam - feel free to take it up with my Mom then... happy? Haha. Bye!

    Yes. Those are all excuses.

    Definitely excuses.

    By the way, you might want to be careful about referring to SAD as a serious illness. It's pretty offensive to those of us who actually have life-threatening illnesses.

    I had years of fighting SAD--I would call it a minor challenge rather than a serious illness.

    Is your body fat measure coming from your scale? It seems inaccurate. You might want to consider a BodPod or other more scientific measurement.

    Extreme cases of SAD can lead to suicide and other issues, so I don't think it is wrong to say it can be serious.

    Also, and I am not saying this meanly, but I really don't understand why some believe she is giving an excuse. She knows the reason why her weight went up, and is working towards correcting it, including changing her environment so that she is less tempted.

    ^^^ This! SAD is a form of major depression, which takes lives. Mild cases of SAD are differentially categorized as, "Winter Blues." There's a good book of that name by Dr. Norman Rosenthal, one of the doctors who discovered SAD, that might be of interest to anyone who needs to learn more.

    If I knew twenty years ago, before I moved away from this area, what I know now about SAD how severe it can be... how different many aspects of my life would have been. For anyone that says the depression and side effects of SAD are not serious... well that's good it is not - for you. At least I know now, and can play with the cards I've been given... and that, I am doing...

    And thank you, yes, moving forward is exactly what I am doing, rather than saying woe is me, I'm the victim, can't do anything about it and just eating/gaining more.

    I wake up at 4:30/4:45 AM so I can use the therapeutic light starting at 5/5:15 each day for an hour - as studies have shown the earlier you use it, the more effective it is. Normally I am on the treadmill or exercise bike when I use it after a light breakfast, as again studies have shown that the effect of exercise + light > light alone. After the sun rises, I do my "actual" workout, which in the offseason consists of an 8-16 mile run, always outside in daylight. But daylight isn't so frequent here in the winter... I work from home so actually have purchased a pop-up greenhouse that I work in at times so I can get more sunlight, or I need to go to a cafe with a sunlit window as the place I'm staying doesn't have direct sun aside from a bit in the mornings. In the evenings I use the light (which is a new technology and brighter than ordinary SAD lamps, and set me back almost $500) again for another hour, even when I am tired or don't feel like it. This is in addition to being stricter with my diet than usual, especially with sugars. I also learned techniques such as cognitive behavioral therapy and mindful meditation to assist in the process. I was taking supplements until my Vitamin D and B12 levels were found to be too high. I have had to leave town before and head south as it has gotten *that* bad.

    If anyone can look at me and think I make excuses about fitness, diet and health - or anything else for that matter - it just makes me laugh. People are often critical toward others on things they are insecure about themselves - so to those people I would just suggest to look at things you feel you are making excuses for in your own life and correct that, rather than trying to point the finger at others.
  • mccindy72
    mccindy72 Posts: 7,001 Member
    I find it interesting that you haven't answered any of my comments regarding having an unhealthy view of food. Why is that? I'm not being argumentative in any way, I'm curious. I stated things in a debatable way, but no response?
  • elphie754
    elphie754 Posts: 7,574 Member
    RiseHigher wrote: »
    Dnarules wrote: »
    elphie754 wrote: »
    RiseHigher wrote: »
    elphie754 wrote: »
    I am sorry but I see a lot of excuses and blaming everything on something (TOM, SAD etc). You are a grown up. Take responsibilities for your actions and stop finding excuses.

    Pbbbfffft. Do I look like I make excuses. Nope. I gain water weight with my TOM. I gain weight when I get hungry with SAD. Not blaming it just it what it is. I'm 5 or so lbs over where I was. Not 50 or 100. LOL. You can go flame another thread now, bye....
    rainbowbow wrote: »
    I just want to know if it's normal to leave an open jar of jam at room temperature all day and then store it in the pantry. :s

    No. Ick

    Fine. Any other opinions on the storage of jam - feel free to take it up with my Mom then... happy? Haha. Bye!

    Yes. Those are all excuses.

    Definitely excuses.

    By the way, you might want to be careful about referring to SAD as a serious illness. It's pretty offensive to those of us who actually have life-threatening illnesses.

    I had years of fighting SAD--I would call it a minor challenge rather than a serious illness.

    Is your body fat measure coming from your scale? It seems inaccurate. You might want to consider a BodPod or other more scientific measurement.

    Extreme cases of SAD can lead to suicide and other issues, so I don't think it is wrong to say it can be serious.

    Also, and I am not saying this meanly, but I really don't understand why some believe she is giving an excuse. She knows the reason why her weight went up, and is working towards correcting it, including changing her environment so that she is less tempted.

    ^^^ This! SAD is a form of major depression, which takes lives. Mild cases of SAD are differentially categorized as, "Winter Blues." There's a good book of that name by Dr. Norman Rosenthal, one of the doctors who discovered SAD, that might be of interest to anyone who needs to learn more.

    If I knew twenty years ago, before I moved away from this area, what I know now about SAD how severe it can be... how different many aspects of my life would have been. For anyone that says the depression and side effects of SAD are not serious... well that's good it is not - for you. At least I know now, and can play with the cards I've been given... and that, I am doing...

    And thank you, yes, moving forward is exactly what I am doing, rather than saying woe is me, I'm the victim, can't do anything about it and just eating/gaining more.

    I wake up at 4:30/4:45 AM so I can use the therapeutic light starting at 5/5:15 each day for an hour - as studies have shown the earlier you use it, the more effective it is. Normally I am on the treadmill or exercise bike when I use it after a light breakfast, as again studies have shown that the effect of exercise + light > light alone. After the sun rises, I do my "actual" workout, which in the offseason consists of an 8-16 mile run, always outside in daylight. But daylight isn't so frequent here in the winter... I work from home so actually have purchased a pop-up greenhouse that I work in at times so I can get more sunlight, or I need to go to a cafe with a sunlit window as the place I'm staying doesn't have direct sun aside from a bit in the mornings. In the evenings I use the light (which is a new technology and brighter than ordinary SAD lamps, and set me back almost $500) again for another hour, even when I am tired or don't feel like it. This is in addition to being stricter with my diet than usual, especially with sugars. I also learned techniques such as cognitive behavioral therapy and mindful meditation to assist in the process. I was taking supplements until my Vitamin D and B12 levels were found to be too high. I have had to leave town before and head south as it has gotten *that* bad.

    If anyone can look at me and think I make excuses about fitness, diet and health - or anything else for that matter - it just makes me laugh. People are often critical toward others on things they are insecure about themselves - so to those people I would just suggest to look at things you feel you are making excuses for in your own life and correct that, rather than trying to point the finger at others.

    I am diagnosed bipolar and bulimic and have certainly have had my fair share of serious episodes that have been life threatening (such as suicide attempts that landed me in ICU). I have NEVER used it as an excuse for my weight or eating.
  • amberlyda1
    amberlyda1 Posts: 154 Member
    mccindy72 wrote: »
    I find it interesting that you haven't answered any of my comments regarding having an unhealthy view of food. Why is that? I'm not being argumentative in any way, I'm curious. I stated things in a debatable way, but no response?

    because you come across very negative and somewhat obsessed that she has an eating disorder or body dis-morphia. I believe she stated several times that she is an accomplished marathon runner so her view of food would probably be very different than you or I. Food is fuel, its not just about weight loss in this case. A cheat meal/day will effect someone who is in rigorous training very differently than the average person who is just trying to loose a few extra pounds. She didnt start the post saying she felt fat/ gross etc. She asked a question to get a general poll, if a question she asked her mom was out of line.