Old Nuts

13567…10

Replies

  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 18,224 Member
    senecarr wrote: »
    oyChihuahua wrote: »
    juggernaut1974 wrote: »
    All this talk of nuts
    One question remains unasked
    Have you tried keto?

    Keto sprang mom from jail
    found my lost shot gun and hound
    and cured my tax audit

    I failed keto
    now I can't remember all
    the number of syllable schemes it takes to do a haiku, dang it.

    Dementia is cruel
    Coconut oil by the cup
    Fix your synapses
  • kk_inprogress
    kk_inprogress Posts: 3,077 Member
    senecarr wrote: »
    oyChihuahua wrote: »
    juggernaut1974 wrote: »
    All this talk of nuts
    One question remains unasked
    Have you tried keto?

    Keto sprang mom from jail
    found my lost shot gun and hound
    and cured my tax audit

    I failed keto
    now I can't remember all
    the number of syllable schemes it takes to do a haiku, dang it.

    You have Alzheimer's
    I'll sure remind you later
    Because you'll forget
  • tincanonastring
    tincanonastring Posts: 3,944 Member
    slimy coffee craze
    keto fiends everywhere
    not in this thread please
  • juggernaut1974
    juggernaut1974 Posts: 6,212 Member
    senecarr wrote: »
    oyChihuahua wrote: »
    juggernaut1974 wrote: »
    All this talk of nuts
    One question remains unasked
    Have you tried keto?

    Keto sprang mom from jail
    found my lost shot gun and hound
    and cured my tax audit

    I failed keto
    now I can't remember all
    the number of syllable schemes it takes to do a haiku, dang it.

    Unfortunately
    This is a known side effect
    Try the low carb group
  • Blueseraphchaos
    Blueseraphchaos Posts: 843 Member
    My dad is trying
    The Paleo diet now
    I sit and shake head

    Sorry to any who are partial to Paleo :ppppp
  • queenliz99
    queenliz99 Posts: 15,317 Member
    Remind me again
    Dementia or Alzheimer's
    Genetics don't lie
  • Blueseraphchaos
    Blueseraphchaos Posts: 843 Member
    tincanonastring wrote: »
    slimy coffee craze
    keto fiends everywhere
    not in this thread please

    Slimy coffee sounds
    Absolutely disgusting
    Why not try Zoidberg?
  • juggernaut1974
    juggernaut1974 Posts: 6,212 Member
    Coffee: beans not nuts
    Coconuts: not really nuts
    Fun trivia facts
  • Blueseraphchaos
    Blueseraphchaos Posts: 843 Member
    I'm on Percocet
    Everything sounds disgusting
    My cats think I'm nuts
  • Derp_Diggler
    Derp_Diggler Posts: 1,456 Member
    Do not disparage
    my old nuts are still useful
    even when shrivelled
  • senecarr
    senecarr Posts: 5,377 Member
    juggernaut1974 wrote: »
    Coffee: beans not nuts
    Coconuts: not really nuts
    Fun trivia facts

    Did you know cashew
    comes from the fruit of the tree
    Not real nuts either
  • kk_inprogress
    kk_inprogress Posts: 3,077 Member
    All of those cans of
    Mixed nuts I've consumed lately
    Were all just big lies
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
    queenliz99 wrote: »
    Remind me again
    Dementia or Alzheimer's
    Genetics don't lie

    Geneticists die.
    If they drink coffee with butter
    they are also nuts.
  • Blueseraphchaos
    Blueseraphchaos Posts: 843 Member
    I have two male cats
    They lost their nuts at a young
    Age. Tragic losses.
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
    kkenseth wrote: »
    All of those cans of
    Mixed nuts I've consumed lately
    Were all just big lies

    Most relations with nuts
    are big lies, do like Blue's cats
    and cut your losses.
  • d_thomas02
    d_thomas02 Posts: 9,055 Member
    Jacwhite22 wrote: »
    oyChihuahua wrote: »
    extra_medium wrote: »
    CyberTone wrote: »
    If they are salted, rinse them off, let them dry, then scatter them outside to feed the birds, squirrels, and chipmunks.

    I don't think the birds or squirrels will care if they are salted :)

    Low Sodium diets
    The doctors prescribe to us
    but who really listens?

    6-7-6 - fail. :(

    As the form has evolved, many of the rules—including the 5/7/5 practice—have been routinely broken. However, the philosophy of haiku has been preserved: the focus on a brief moment in time; a use of provocative, colorful images; an ability to be read in one breath; and a sense of sudden enlightenment and illumination.

    (too much info for a haiku, sorry)
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    This content has been removed.
  • kk_inprogress
    kk_inprogress Posts: 3,077 Member
    My husband would cry
    And I'd be in jail locked up
    I'm no Lorena
  • WinoGelato
    WinoGelato Posts: 13,454 Member
    I just found this thread
    Title mislead me as well
    Tin Can Beard No More?

  • kk_inprogress
    kk_inprogress Posts: 3,077 Member
    WinoGelato wrote: »
    I just found this thread
    Title mislead me as well
    Tin Can Beard No More?

    A sad discov'ry
    That epic beard is no more
    Thought he was kidding :(
  • Blueseraphchaos
    Blueseraphchaos Posts: 843 Member
    d_thomas02 wrote: »
    Jacwhite22 wrote: »
    oyChihuahua wrote: »
    extra_medium wrote: »
    CyberTone wrote: »
    If they are salted, rinse them off, let them dry, then scatter them outside to feed the birds, squirrels, and chipmunks.

    I don't think the birds or squirrels will care if they are salted :)

    Low Sodium diets
    The doctors prescribe to us
    but who really listens?

    6-7-6 - fail. :(

    As the form has evolved, many of the rules—including the 5/7/5 practice—have been routinely broken. However, the philosophy of haiku has been preserved: the focus on a brief moment in time; a use of provocative, colorful images; an ability to be read in one breath; and a sense of sudden enlightenment and illumination.

    (too much info for a haiku, sorry)

    I am an English
    Major and minor. The phrase
    "But yet" drives me nuts.

    This has no bearing
    On this conversation, so
    Let's try sonnets next!
  • WinoGelato
    WinoGelato Posts: 13,454 Member
    First the Peep Cleanse Gone
    Now the beard is gone as well
    Unicorn Despair
  • kk_inprogress
    kk_inprogress Posts: 3,077 Member
    WinoGelato wrote: »
    First the Peep Cleanse Gone
    Now the beard is gone as well
    Unicorn Despair

    Don't cry, Sparkly one
    An oasis exists for
    Unicorns and nuts.
  • juggernaut1974
    juggernaut1974 Posts: 6,212 Member
    edited January 2016
    WinoGelato wrote: »
    First the Peep Cleanse Gone
    Now the beard is gone as well
    Unicorn Despair

    Fear not fair maiden
    New Years brings resolutions
    What's gone may return
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 18,224 Member
    d_thomas02 wrote: »
    Jacwhite22 wrote: »
    oyChihuahua wrote: »
    extra_medium wrote: »
    CyberTone wrote: »
    If they are salted, rinse them off, let them dry, then scatter them outside to feed the birds, squirrels, and chipmunks.

    I don't think the birds or squirrels will care if they are salted :)

    Low Sodium diets
    The doctors prescribe to us
    but who really listens?

    6-7-6 - fail. :(

    As the form has evolved, many of the rules—including the 5/7/5 practice—have been routinely broken. However, the philosophy of haiku has been preserved: the focus on a brief moment in time; a use of provocative, colorful images; an ability to be read in one breath; and a sense of sudden enlightenment and illumination.

    (too much info for a haiku, sorry)

    New haiku is bad
    Some things should be left alone
    Like Tara Reid's boobs.
  • WinoGelato
    WinoGelato Posts: 13,454 Member
    juggernaut1974 wrote: »
    WinoGelato wrote: »
    First the Peep Cleanse Gone
    Now the beard is gone as well
    Unicorn Despair

    Fear not fair maiden
    New Years brings resolutions
    What's gone may return

    I shall wait and wait
    For beards and sugary treats
    Wait that sounds perverse
  • Nanogg55
    Nanogg55 Posts: 275 Member
    Nuts in bird feeder
    Pole greasy to foil squirrels
    They slide down puzzled
  • kk_inprogress
    kk_inprogress Posts: 3,077 Member
    Nanogg55 wrote: »
    Nuts in bird feeder
    Pole greasy to foil squirrels
    They slide down puzzled

    Greasy poles and nuts
    This thread really delivers
    How's that for gutter?
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 18,224 Member
    kkenseth wrote: »
    Nanogg55 wrote: »
    Nuts in bird feeder
    Pole greasy to foil squirrels
    They slide down puzzled

    Greasy poles and nuts
    This thread really delivers
    How's that for gutter?

    Your mind is twisted
    Dirty like the gutter
    I really like it
  • kk_inprogress
    kk_inprogress Posts: 3,077 Member
    Alatariel75 wrote: »
    kkenseth wrote: »
    Nanogg55 wrote: »
    Nuts in bird feeder
    Pole greasy to foil squirrels
    They slide down puzzled

    Greasy poles and nuts
    This thread really delivers
    How's that for gutter?

    Your mind is twisted
    Dirty like the gutter
    I really like it

    You're such a sweetheart
    Best compliment of today
    I love you long time

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