WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR APRIL 2016
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I'm married to the same man for going on 44 years in August. I fell in love with his voice before I even looked up to see his face; still feel the same way. Always have, always will. He is my 'rock'; I'm his 'balloon'. We do a lot together and we do a lot separate. There are just things that one enjoys; that the other doesn't. We plan our 'away time' at the same time. We take all 3 of our DGDs that live next door on a long weekend to the beach. w
We've gone to Atlanta for the weekend (and we've enjoyed that trip); but, they really prefer to go to Villano Beach, FL near St. Augustine. I always want to go to 'Old Town' so I can pick up another flamingo to add to my collection.
I like a vinegar-based 'hot' BBQ sauce. Grew up eating BBQ that way. I have to taste the sauce before I agree to having it put on my BBQ in the first place. I also like hand-rubbed seasoning. My DOS can grill BBQ ribs that fall off the bones. Yummy! Both my DOS and DYS are 'great cooks'. DYS lives in Louisiana ... so Cajun Cuisine is one of the things he has mastered. His chicken, sausage, duck gumbo is to 'kill for'. We usually bring some of it home with us.
I de-cluttered my bookshelf at the end of my counter where I keep my cookbooks; I decided after doing it (straightened it up mainly) that I need to go through it again and actually throw some of that stuff on it away! That mood hasn't hit me yet; The only thing I need to do in MBR is under my bed. Hoping that DH will hurry up and finish the glassed-in porch. Supposedly, he is going to see about a door and get a carpenter he sometimes works with to come out and hang it. At this point; if he will just fill in the cracks and insulate it; I'd be thrilled for the carpenter to finish it off.
We have a bad case of 'carpenter bees' ... Hell on a wooden house. When DOS picked up his turkey; they had 'carpenter bee' traps for sale. He bought one for us. Look simple to make. Box that hangs from a chain with a Mason jar in the bottom; and holes the size of a carpenter bee drilled into each side. We hung it up Saturday AM and the jar is covered at the bottom. $15 each; I think my DH could make some for out house to hang all around it from scrap wood and I have plenty of mason jars.0 -
Rats- lost my reply. Here we go again.
Sylvia the turnip flowers pics were lovely. It is good news that you are recovering so well and getting out to enjoy the spring. They remind me of the sunflower fields in Bulgaria. Such happy flowers.
Anne how nice for your friends that you cook for them. I liked your description- giving love through acts of service. I can see it.
Margaret I agree that distance is sometimes the best answer. Life is too short for depression and anger.
Larissa It is sad that there was no spark. However, Congratulations on getting the courage to plunge into dating.
MicheleThe FDA and DEA have suggested medication disposal instructions. Some med school are so dangerous that they cannot be put into kitty litter or coffee grounds and then in a sealed plastic bad or box. States also have disposal requirements and return programs. Some do get flushed rather than camouflaged and put in trash. These tend to be the controlled substances or other strong, bad actors with real potential to harm others for whom it is not prescribed. The best thing is to check with pharmacy and state Web site.
AllisonIt just sounds like the family is thankful for your help.
Heather I really hope you have a good time with DS. It sounds promising.
Katlawhat a nice day.
I was depressed and on my way to versatile. With Michele's encouragement, I ended up under calorie limit even without exercise. Thanks, Michele.
Thank you all for the wedding invitation advice. I am not going- with no guilt.
CJ.
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Larissa It is sad that there was no spark. However, Congratulations on getting the courage to plunge into dating.
Thank you all for the wedding invitation advice. I am not going- with no guilt.
Thank you, CJ. I'm glad I did it.
And good for you, not going to the wedding. It's an invitation, not a summons.
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Chris in MA who has stars in her eyes. Wrote:
"Ok, I'm ready to spill about my trip to Newport, RI with PB (potential boyfriend). I'm sure the neighbors were talking about the tall, dark and handsome man who picked me up in the Porche. When we got to Newport we discovered that it was Daffodil Day and there must have been a million daffodils in bloom. The weather was sunny and we enjoyed walking around the beautiful, quaint town with the scent of daffodils everywhere. He was not raised in the United States and has a continental charm and impeccable manners. He would always take my hand as we walked and he was always on the street side, open doors, put my coat on and off, etc. He is extremely intelligent and has some interesting talents. We talked constantly, he loves good conversation, thinks it is extremely important, and said that one of the things he likes about me is our great conversations. He makes me feel like a queen, I can't stop smiling when I'm with him. He must be feeling something too because within 1/2 hour of dropping me off he sent me a message thanking me for a wonderful time and saying that he enjoyed every moment with me. Sigh....the romantic movie continues...I think his status may go to BF (boyfriend) soon."
This is so much fun!! I'm sitting here grinning ear to ear. Jack and I met on line. The first date we went to dinner and a movie. He walked me to the house and kissed me goodnight (we had talked on the phone every night for almost a month by that time, couple weeks online before that). After the kiss he said your eyes are sparkling, I said guess who put that sparkle there. We've been together ever since, over 9 years now. You go girl, enjoy it and have fun. By the way, he brought me flowers the first date too, not a rose tho
Janetr OKC
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Of to London today!
Type to ya later!
Heather UK1 -
Morning ladies~
well I went to bed at 4 pm last night slept until 7:30 was awake until after 10:30 woke up at 5.. this stuff has settled in my chest and I have to work as only assistant today from 8-5 .. then I will come home and pass out.. sorry not to talkative today0 -
Good morning all! Happy Monday! Weather in my area has been beautiful, sunny and mid to high 70's. I spent a good part of the weekend doing yard work and being busy outside. Raked the yard for sticks and twigs. Got under the pines that line the back yard and raked up all of the needles and cones. Picked up all of the rocks that the kiddos play with in the yard and put them back in the rock bed. Picked up all of the outdoor toys (balls, Tonkas, pails and shovels). Cleaned up my stairwell that leads to my basement and discovered two dead mice (Ew!) and a stray rambling rose shoot growing between the stairwell boards. Pulled it out (got a good portion of the root) and replanted it on the south side of the house. Also got the inside of my house clean, laundry, etc. It was nice to be able to pull my throw rugs out into the open air and beat the heck out of them and get them really clean. Writing what I did down, makes it seem like I was busier than I actually was, but it really didn't seem to take long. About 2-3 hours Sat and Sun. But of course after all of the outdoor work, my nose and throat are not feeling great. I imagine it's the pollen, dust, mold etc. Then I ate more "salty" foods this weekend than I normally do (Chinese food and brats). So I was awake about every hour last night needing water. Anyway, feels good to get things done. Next weekend, I will be burning the sticks collected (along with our "burn file" papers), raking the front lawn once more to get rid of thatch, cleaning out the gutters, and de-mousing my shed.
Miriam-you mentioned using pine needles for compost around roses? Is this correct? Like the fallen, brown (older) needles? Can they be used around any other plants? I have started saving my egg shells and started a little mini compost bucket. I am using a Home Depot orange mixing bucket that has a tight lid, so I can roll it to mix it. Should I be shredding my veg matter before putting it in there?
Allie- Hope you feel better!
Chris- your date sounds like a romantic movie! He sounds wonderful! Good for you and keep having fun!
Sylvia- So good to see you are easing back into your life and art! I am sure you will be throwing again soon. I LOVED the turnip field pics! I never knew that they grew such beautiful flowers!
Rori- Your snowy picture looks gorgeous! I like all seasons; although that much snow this close to spring would definitely burst that "springtime" bubble for me! IN regards to Hawaii, I have never been; but if I went, I would seek out the quieter spots and avoid the main island (maybe save it for a day trip or fly over). I have been to a few places in the Caribbean and know that I prefer the "unknown" spots.
Michele- we have septic also and have always been very careful with what we put down our drains/into our pipes. When my sister came up to visit and help cook for my daughters grad open house, I could have killed her. She poured a pan of grease down my drain and then also sent a lot of melted chocolate down a little later. If she does this at her own home and has no problems, I don't know. But about a week after the open house, I had to have a plumber out to snake out the drains. Ugh! Your healthy cookie recipe reminded me of a "cookie dough" dip made with chick peas...I haven't made it in a while, but that was a hit with family and daycare. I will have to find it and make it again.
Lenora- Congrats on the smaller size!
Anne- Your lasagna sounds delish! Who can resist a really good home made lasagna?! My daughter talks about love languages all of the time. I need to read the book. Not knowing what the other identifiers are for the other options, I would say service is a good chance of being mine also.
Cheri- Hope your dh hears something about a job soon! Interviewing and waiting for response is SO hard!
BArbie- I never went to any of my class reunions because I felt like I was the "loner" and never really stayed in touch with any of my friends from high school. I was kind of surprised when I reconnected, face to face, with a half dozen girls from high school, that I had found (or they found me) on facebook. They were surprised that I felt so invisible in school. They always thought that I was so popular and outgoing. I guess it just goes to show that even in the midst of a crowd, you can still feel all alone. I remember high school as being a very lonely and angst filled time.
Margaret- I totally understand where the author is coming from when she talks about needing to put distance between you and a "toxic" person. Unfortunately for me, this person is my younger sister. I was really hoping for more connection between us when she found out about her brain cancer, but as much help as I gave financially, physically and emotionally; it still wasn't enough for her (and she was getting support from many family members). It took a LOT of meditation on this for me to understand that she was always a "bucket taker". Always taking from some ones "bucket", never replenishing or giving in return. No, I take that back, she did give, but what she gave was "poison" and ruined the giving for me. It hurt and made it impossible for me to give anymore to any one for a while. I had to empty my bucket and be around people who could fill my bucket again. All of you ladies are part of my team of "bucket fillers". You inspire, support, give advice and kindness and have helped to fill my bucket and make my life more joyful! Which according to Marie Kondo, you spark joy; so I will keep you all! Thank you, ladies!2 -
KJ, pine straw is the old needles that fall. It is a great mulch since it does not decompose as fast as other leaves. But it does not make good compost because it does not decompose. It can be used as mulch around any plant. Also, remember that compost needs air, so after you roll your mini-composter around, be sure to leave it open! That is why it is important to turn a compost pile- to get air to all of it. Aerobic decomposition does not smell bad. Anaerobic decomposition reeks! (Anaerobic means no air.) You don't need to preshred what you put in a compost pile, but it does speed up the process.
Off to take my littlest one to the doctor for a checkup for her ADHD meds.0 -
MightyLolo wrote: »Larissa It is sad that there was no spark. However, Congratulations on getting the courage to plunge into dating.
Thank you all for the wedding invitation advice. I am not going- with no guilt.
Thank you, CJ. I'm glad I did it.
And good for you, not going to the wedding. It's an invitation, not a summons.
I need to remember this.2 -
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KJ - This had me giggling fit to beat the band but you're absolutely right!All of you ladies are part of my team of "bucket fillers". You inspire, support, give advice and kindness and have helped to fill my bucket and make my life more joyful! Which according to Marie Kondo, you spark joy; so I will keep you all! Thank you, ladies!
/Penny
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Did 40 minutes of an Amee Nicotera DVD for the lower and upper body. I truly thought it was a longer DVD. Anyway, the plan for tomorrow is to do a Prevention Strong and Slim DVD. We shall see what that one's about, its a new one for me.
Today is one of those busy days for me. I go to the church and count the donation money, then we go to the soup kitchen to drop off the donations I got from the church yesterday, then senior bowling, home for dinner, then ceramics, then mahjongg, then home to collapse
Chris - oh, that PB sounds heavenly. He'll become a BF pretty soon I predict.
MightyLoLo - don't worry, I predict there will be juicy details coming in the future from Chris!
Lenora - I didn't grow up with a vinegar based BBQ suace, and the first time I had it, I thought it was the most horrible thing on the earth. Guess it's a lot of what you're used to, and I wasn't used to this at all.
Anne - I'm the same way, I love to cook for others and get a lot of joy seeing them enjoy the food.
CJ - glad I could be of help with the calorie count. Good for you not going to that wedding!
You know, people responded to things others wrote and I didn't remember reading about that. Well, today I logged in and before MFP would take you to your last post. Only now it doesn't. So that's probably why I've missed some things
KJ - I hear ya about the dead mice. Sometimes we'll get one in the pool. I've gotten it out with the leaf catcher and just thrown it away. There are times when it's in the skimmer. Usually I'll let Vince dispose of that one. As long as I can't see it, I'm OK. Isn't it just maddening when someone puts grease down the drain? I have to constantly remind Jess that we're on a septic so the grease has to go in the jar.
Miriam - we used to live in Kennett Square, PA -- the mushroom capital of the world (seriously, look in the stores, a lot of the packages of the mushrooms you see will be from Kennett Square). Anyway, the first time they turned over that soil from those farms, I honestly thought there was something wrong with our septic! After a while you sort-of get used to the smell.
Going to post this and see what MFP does next time I log in.
Michele in NC0 -
Reflections:
Kelly I understand how painful it can be to cut yourself from a family member. I have an older brother who is difficult.
Lerner the author of The Dance of Anger cautions that cutting yourself off completely can generate an underground anxiety that can pop up unexpectedly. I believe what she is talking about is forgiveness for that person. I do forgive my brother, but I do not trust him. I can be civil to him. A close relationship is not in the cards. That is okay.
I agree with her to think carefully before you act when anger. Anger wants me to propel forward quickly. I know how well that has worked in my life. NOT! Observing and reflecting are the first order of business. I know I have said this before but I need this reminder. Mark Twain when he was angry gave it three days. If he was still angry at the end of that time he would make a decision about what to do about it. Wise man.
She also recommend making changes within relationships that are not so intense before moving onto to those filled with anxiety and major conflict. I am doing this with the friend I talked about. I am moving very slowly with my DS.
Some of her key points to think about if something is making me angry:
1. If staying silent on an issue breeds resentment or bitterness it is best to speak up. It can be as simple as I don't like that.
2. Again try to give myself space rather than rush into the fire of the conflict.
3. Good questions to ask myself when I am trying to sort out my feelings What is the real issue? Where do I stand? Who is responsible for what? What will or will not do? (What are my limits?) Is it worth all this energy?
4. Avoid what I call the blame and persecution game.
5. Use I language and be specific in a request. Honor when the request is not given. It never hurts to ask and a pleasant surprise might be in store.
6. Sometimes the choice is being right or happy. I like happy.
7. Avoid arguments that go nowhere like is wheat bread more nutritious than white. My roommate in college goaded my into this argument for fifteen minutes. It went no where.
8. Others are responsible for their own behavior and feelings not me.
9. Avoid third parties. Only muddies the water.
10. Hit and run confrontations rarely make lasting change. If they happen just accept emotions got the best of me. Dust myself off and try again.
She does give me many points on which to ponder.1 -
Lenora ~ I'm sure the BBQ you mentioned is Fresh Air. I wish the one in Jackson had easier access for wheel chair folks. I would love to take my mom there. The last time we went, we had to go back to Indian Springs and eat in the park. There is now one in Macon that I could take her to but we loved Indian Springs.
Chris ~ So glad your new male friend has worked out so well. He sounds like a catch.
Margaret ~ You are right about stepping back before engaging in an angry outburst. After my father passed away, I got very upset over the will that he left and lashed out at one of my brothers. My relationship with my brothers will never be the same because I lost my temper and said some very awful things. I have apologized in writing to all but there is still an uneasy undercurrent.
KJ ~ You had a very productive weekend.
Beautiful day here!
Carol
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mikesmom - AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!! I CAN'T STAND IT!!!!!!!!!!!.... where's he from, what country, what does he do for a living... how tall is he... DETAILS, DETAILS.... what color are his eyes....
oh yeah, morning peeps1 -
So we are major flooding today. 20 inches of rain so far with more rain expected over the next three days. Falling at times at a rate of 4.5 inches per hour. The bayou and flood system can handle about 2 inches per hour but this down pour has overwhelmed it. The bayou behind my house is out of its banks on the opposite side. Hopefully it won't come over on our side. My house is up 4 ft but the garage would fill. I want my sunshine back.
Marcelyn
Underwater in Houston.0 -
Leonora: Your post today made me happy. I loved reading about things that you like.
Margaret: I very much appreciate your list of things to think about when something is creating angry feelings. It seems that The Dance of Anger is a very valuable book. I particularly like number three: "What is the real issue? Where do I stand? Who is responsible for what? What will or will not do? (What are my limits?) Is it worth all this energy?" I need to go through this group of questions to achieve clarity when I face either a conflict or a decision. I also need the reminder about avoiding the blame game & hit and run confrontations.
Carol: My mom had a number of pithy sayings, and your comment about engaging in an angry outburst reminded me of one of them. "Too soon old, too late smart." I didn't get it when I was younger, but I sure do now. My regrets are mostly of things left unsaid or undone. I also understand the value of learning a lesson and moving on without beating yourself up. I can't go back for a "do over." I would certainly do over a number of things if I could.
I hope your relationship with your siblings eventually heals. :flowerforyou:
Last night I spent about half an hour watching little fish jumping in the shallows near the edge of the river. I think they were smelt and may have been getting ready to spawn. I probably stood there for half an hour watching the show they put on. None of the predatory birds that feed on small fish were around. I think it was past their bedtimes. :bigsmile:
Katla in Beautiful NW Oregon
Tibetan proverb: "The secret to living well and long is: Eat half, walk double, laugh triple and love without measure..."
“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.” Thomas A. Edison
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Sylvia, you just keep enjoying your life, don't worry about us. That said, thank you for letting us know you're OK. You stay on my mind, my dear...
Rori, and anyone else around Denver, my absolute sympathy for the April snowstorm. Thus my residency in West Texas. Just sayin'.
Lenora, thanks for the question on the warehouse. "Pickers" is a good way to put it, but if all this works the way we're all hoping, won't have to spend a dime for the stuff I sell, and should at least make back my expenses from this trip (if things sell, of course). With a trailer that is twice as long and eight feet high, should be able to quadruple or quintuple the sellables. And, I still get to declare my mileage, hotel rooms, etc., on each trip on my federal taxes next year. We will be sending my sis and her husband ten percent of whatever we make from everything. They protested that we were already saving them money, as they have to pay by the pound to dump stuff, but I'll make sure they get rewarded. They'll be putting in work to get things sorted and loaded for us, and need to be paid for that.
Chris in MA, so pleased for you... trying hard not to say "please be careful," like an old worrywart... But PLEASE be careful. I genuinely hope he is everything he purports to be!
Got back yesterday afternoon, unloaded the truck and helped the DH put back the fence panels that had been torn down by the wind. Got home about 7 last night.
This morning, I just finally to the point where I can move my eyes to read and my fingers to type, so I have to go finish my weekly article and get it to the newspaper. That will be my last responsible act of the day. I feel like crap on a cracker, and have the headache from hell. All sinus, it shifts when I bend or move. I so seldom feel like ca-ca, and am hoping a few more sinus meds and a nap will put me back in fighting form.
Love y'all,
Later, Lisa, back in West Texas, where it's rainy, wet and cool.0
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