WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR MAY 2016
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CCSJ09~ ((((((hugs to you ))))))))) I am sorry all you and your husband are going thru. My prayers are with you and your family.
Becca1 -
Pip~ Beautiful letter and quite a testimony to the struggles Kirby and you have endured. (((hugs)))
Becca1 -
KetoneKaren~Lovely dress! I love wearing retro-ish dresses. The slip peeking that pop of color is the best part!
Becca
Oregon2 -
anner - we have a scooter with a sidecar - ours is a stella, kinda mint green color. we still have it, don't ride it cuz I ride bike now... we will be selling it when we get back to California probably so we can get what we want for it, no negotiation on that one. I'll upload pics when I have time. it's a remake of a 1971 vespa2
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Karen - Lovely dress - a bit like a retro one I wore for my son's wedding.
Tonight I tried to open up the discussion of what I would like for my own treatment approaching death. It was much too much for DH who had to watch his last partner die slowly of cancer in their home when she was only 47. It brought all the trauma back. It is difficult for me because it is a subject I care a lot about and I would not want him to have to go through a similar thing again, but he doesn't see it that way, he just thinks it is me wanting my own way. Oh well. Who knows how we will find our end. His point is that we shouldn't impose our will on other people, because we don't know how they will feel when it comes to it. I can't bear to think that people will only remember me as ill and old and I don't want to be a burden. I would rather go gracefully. Anyway, he knows my opinion. He was just sobbing his heart out.
Love to all, Heather UK1 -
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Hidee Ho ladies~
got out of work at 5:15,sitting down and packing for staying overnight up at Faiths... gonna take my grocery and shopping list to see what I can find that is good..0 -
Becca, I have the exact same scooter but mine is BARBIE PINK and has the "trunk" box on the back. My helmet is also Barbie pink! I haven't been able to ride it since the girls came to stay three years ago. I am hoping to this year as they are old enough to leave at home when I bop to the store for a few things.2
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Hi all! Sorry I disappeared after sharing my tale of woe. My meeting went better than expected although I was told that I bordered on insubordination with my question as to whether all staff were treated like I am. Turns out, the complainant and I had a couple of days of very civil back and forth discussion until I found the two (not four) missing memorial gifts. I did not have adequate information on either of them so he ended up writing me a profuse apology. As "suggested" by my supervisor, I wrote an apology email to the pastor. I did tell him that the question was not directed at him personally, but for the church as a whole. He has to ask a big favor of me today so I guess all is forgiven.
I have been encouraged by folks at my other job to apply for a position at a HUD low income housing for the elderly unit. That church donated the property and the ownership will revert back to them in about six years. I applied for the same job before but was turned down because I don't have a social work degree. I will apply again just to see what happens. No one on the BOD sees the need for a social work degree.
In the meantime, my reflux flared up Tuesday and I spent the day on Wednesday in bed with a migraine accompanied by vomiting. This 15 hour per week job is killing me! Literally.
Thanks for all of your support and advice. Y'all mean the world to me!
Kudos to those who deserve them and a boot to the backside of those who need that.
Carol in NC1 -
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cityjaneLondon wrote: »Tonight I tried to open up the discussion of what I would like for my own treatment approaching death. It was much too much for DH who had to watch his last partner die slowly of cancer in their home when she was only 47. It brought all the trauma back. It is difficult for me because it is a subject I care a lot about and I would not want him to have to go through a similar thing again, but he doesn't see it that way, he just thinks it is me wanting my own way. Oh well. Who knows how we will find our end. His point is that we shouldn't impose our will on other people, because we don't know how they will feel when it comes to it. I can't bear to think that people will only remember me as ill and old and I don't want to be a burden. I would rather go gracefully. Anyway, he knows my opinion. He was just sobbing his heart out.
Love to all, Heather UK
I suspect that your DH will not be able to face this discussion with you on his own. If you find yourself with a fatal diagnosis, you should seek couples counseling to talk it though. The right mediator would be a real help.
Our experience with this level of communication breakdown was over a much less serious situation. We were talking about moving. DH wanted to move to our current home and I was reluctant because it would give me a hellish commute. He wanted this place more than anything and could not hear my concerns. DH and I went to a psychologist to discuss the move. It was a humane and productive way to talk things over. We ended up buying this place and I had the commute from hell for many years. I love it here now that I'm retired. I just didn't love the two hourlong commutes bookending 9 hour workdays. Luckily I had summers off.
:ohwell: :noway:0 -
total stats for the day:
ride hm 2 gym- 10.17min, 17.1amph, 155mhr, 2.9mi = 134c
JOG- 25min, 11.28ap/min mi, 5.0-5.5sp, 3incl, 138ahr, 148mhr, 2.18mi = 260c
OTHER- PHYSICAL THERAPY @ gym- 10min, 121mhr, 3 stretches, 2sets of 15 w/5lb weights = 70c
ride gym 2 dome- 5.53min, 14.4amph, 151mhr, 1.4mi = 85c
ride dome 2 hm- 16.36min, 9.2amph, 150mhr, 2.5mi = 172c
total cal 7212 -
Hi ladies: Went to the YM this morning and got in a good workout although I couldn't remember how to get the one machine adjusted. A kind man helped me out. Thanks to those of you who made suggestions for finding a teapot. I will check into Goodwill and the senior citizen thrift shop. DS and DGD came by and picked up his RV this afternoon. They are headed to a swim meet at Anna Cortes this weekend.
CJ and others - Making end of life decisions for others is a hard place to be. Prayers for all concerned. When I went in for my wellness exam this week I was given a booklet called "Five Wishes". It is published by Aging with Dignity and takes the place of a living will. It seems like at least a good place to start a discussion with family.
Katla - Hope yoga went well and you hear from DD soon.
Katiebug - Exactly what Katla quoted! I used to teach Arthritis Foundation Aquatic exercise and the foundation has other classes that they sponsor too. They are all for appropriate exercise.
Kim - I have a place for you to stay (DS's RV) so keep that trip in mind.
Healing angels to all who need them and congratulations to those with victories. Sue in WA1 -
Karen, what a lovely dress and a cheery balance for the sad and scary topics that are being addressed here today.
CJ, thank you for sharing with us....I can't even imagine how hard it must be to watch your husband at this time.
Pip, what a great testimonial about Kirby...you two are a great pair
Carol in NC, good to hear that there was a satisfactory outcome of your frustrating dilemma.
Jake and I love shopping at the grocery store and Costco together..we shop for many things online but food won't be one of them.
Barbie from beautiful sunny NW Washington
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Call me crazy but I love to see other people happy and succeeding .
Good Evening Ladies,
Heather, I sure hope DH can control the anxiety and it won’t hamper your holiday!
Slja, welcome. This is a great group of ladies with tons of support and valuable information. I am willing to use my boot when someone needs a swift kick in the rear. (You do have to ask for it most of the time.) Please sign each post with the name you want to be called and a location, general or specific. It helps us identify you and makes it easier to respond. Come often and join right in.
CarolGA, so sorry to hear about your mom. It is heartbreaking to see them deteriorate. ((((Hugs))))
Kay, welcome back under that magic number! You are so right about not letting it get away from us. Way to go.
Chris, (((Hugs))) to you as well while you go through that with your mother.
Pip, we don’t know why you like riding in the wind so much??? I rode the recumbent bike at the gym today and thought of you. I don’t know how you do it but I think it’s great. You are just a Superwoman!!!
Katla, so glad you had a good visit with DD and the grands. Now to rest.
Meg, congrats on finishing PT. Hope you continue to do well.
Chris, so glad things are still good with BF. Your trip to the Cape sounds wonderful. Have a grand time!!
Allie, knowing it can change “again” at least for now I’m glad you won’t have to take care of the dog too. Congrats on being almost finished at your Dad’s house. You have gotten your workouts there.
Pip, that is so nice of you to offer to work out with your new gym friend. That is wonderful for her and she just doesn’t realize it yet. Gosh I wish I’d find a “Pip” at my new gym!!
Janet #2 (hee hee), that is great that you will have a walking buddy. I’m sure she was impressed with your weight lifting. I know I am.
Barbie, at line dance this week they were actually just reviewing some of the old standards so I didn’t have any trouble at all. I was pleasantly surprised. It felt great to be back.
Sue, I’m sure your tea table will be perfect. Surely you can ask around to find another tea pot or if there is time check out a few garage sales. I hope you get to take a picture to share with us. I don’t do a lot of that sort of thing either and think it’s great that you are doing it. You go girl.
Larisa, so glad you had a great swim and it’s replacing your running for you. Keep on strokin’!
CJ, I’m sitting here with a lump in my throat after reading what you are going through with your DH. I can’t imagine how hard it must be. My best friend lost her hubby 3 years ago and he got to the point where they stopped feeding him when he just got too bad. Luckily he went unconscious right after that and never woke up again so they told her it was a peaceful death. My thoughts and prayers are with you and I’m sending you the peace and strength to make the right decisions for you. ((((Hugs))))
Barb, don’t worry about trying to learn us as it will come in time. Just post responses when something peeks your interest and let us know what’s going on with you. You’ll pick up information about different ones from time to time. It really helps me when people put their name and where they are from at the end of their post. My DD tells me I suffer from “Immediate Memory Loss”.
Alyson, welcome. For sure it’s okay to put yourself first. This is a great group of ladies so visit often.
Joyce, I hadn’t thought of all the $$$$ ya’ll are going to save after the surgery. Do you think Amber will go Blond after a day or two? You are too funny!
Nancy, thanks for the introduction. We have all sorts of ladies here so pull up a chair and put your feet up. You are right that you can come in at any time of day and whatever days you feel like it. Just come as often as you can.
IrishTerri, welcome back!! I thought you had deserted us??? So glad to see you and hope you can hang around. You are doing great with your weight. Way to go.
to any Newbies that I missed. Come often and join in the chat. This thing works!! Please sign your post with what you want to be called. It makes it easier for us to respond to you. Also a location is great, be it specific or general. We are happy to have you join us.
Thanks to so many of you for your kind comments. I hate that I am struggling to keep up but feel like you are all part of my family and I have to find time to visit with you. I went to the gym and worked out for almost an hour today. I actually surprised myself with some of what I could do. I’m sure I’ll be sore tomorrow. I have an appointment with a trainer on Monday to set up a work out for me. I plan to start real slow and build up. It late so I’ll say good night without catching up again. Oh well. I hope all of you have a healthy and happy day. ]
Words I live by:
Savor. I have to slow down and savor every bite.
and
Opportunity. Each day offers new opportunities for good health and happiness if we just look for them and choose them.
I Love you,
DJ
Myrtle Beach, SC
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thanks for the sweet comments my peeps.
just got an early bday card from my sis, signed by her, mom and one of my nieces (with an enclosed $100 chk) that was a sweet surprise!
nite peep-c's1 -
Checking in! Thanks everybody! I was so surprised at the number of people at the rehearsal and luncheon that echoed what all of you said about my polka dots and orange crinoline! I went out on a limb and it was fun!
Hugs to all of you having struggles of one kind or another. My thoughts are with you.
Tomorrow is the Big Fat Wedding! We will all heave a big sigh of relief when the drama is over. In the meantime, it is entertaining.2 -
Pip when is the BD?
Janetr OKC0 -
I only had a 3 pound water loss this morning so I would considered it a preemie so I decided to not name it! So no sister to yesterdays 8 pound pee. Becca, I will have to tell my girls that you had a classmate Latrine. They will get a good laugh over that suggestion. From the looks of my legs I still have a ways to go. Just wish the blood pressure would be showing the water loss. Charlie is just super worried about everything regarding me at this point. I think he is doing this so he won't be worried about himself or maybe he is worried that losing me would be catastrophic. Sometimes it takes something serious happening to yourself to appreciate some one else. I know he hasn't cussed at me one time since his colonoscopy.
Janetr his surgery is scheduled for next Friday at 1. Next week my nephew is coming in to see his 2 aunts. This is the one who was a heroin addict and is finding relationships to be very important now and he is apologizing in his own way. They will come in Wednesday afternoon and leave Thursday afternoon. Wednesday I have a doctor's appointment for myself to check on my legs, B/P etc so this isn't anything I need to put off. Then church and choir practice Wednesday night. Thursday Charlie is on clear liquids so that makes having a nice dinner with family out. I think my only thing I can do to make Matt feel good about him coming over to see just his 2 aunts, well family to, is to skip Wednesday church all together. I more than likely will skip church Sunday plus I don't like the song we are singing at all.
Charlie and I have been talking about his will, advance directive etc. Will is up to date and although e dont' have a written living will I know his preferences. When he was so sick last year and totally unable to help me know what he wanted done we even filled it out but when we went to get a witness they said the hospital doesn't have to follow them. HUH? So why have it. I know it was hard for him to talk about this but I knew it had to be done. It also made us go look for his will and in the process clean out some drawers.
Yes, our laundry bill, diapers and wipes, heavy zip lock bags, medicines. There will be a lot of spaces empty in our budget now!
I have never really asked Sylvia as a MFP friend as I haven't most of you because I really don't go to my home page. I only go here. So I can't message her to see how she is. Am really getting worried about her again.
Becca, love the moped picture and story. I love driving a stick shift. I made sure that I taught both my girls how to drive one. I knew their Father would never have the patience to. If it were up to m I would never have an automatic again. But he has Parkinson's and it so much easier with the auto.
Joyce, Indiana where Mother Nature does not know what season it is. BRRRR0 -
Joyce - I will remember you and Charlie in prayer. Thanks for all the information. It seems like life can just hit us like a ton of bricks sometimes. Great big (((hugs))).
Janetr OKC0 -
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For those of you making end of life decisions for the ones you love, CSSJ, Carol, my heart goes out to you. It's been 17 years since my mother either had a stroke and fell or fell and hit her head, causing the stroke. It had the blessing of being quick, but that's in retrospect. We had to make decisions rapidly on whether to try to save her life or not, and her sister, my only aunt, never forgave us, and me specifically, for having the surgery done to attempt to relieve the bleed in her brain.
The blood thinners she was on due to her heart disease made it impossible for the docs to actually save her... but the same drugs had kept her alive for nearly 20 years. When the time came to decide whether to turn the machines off, the doctor put it in a way that we could all accept--that it was time to let her make the decision. If she took a single breath, it meant she was still fighting. If she did not, it was time to let her go, because she was ready. Her heart beat for four more hours, but she never took another breath. It was a long, dark night indeed. I cannot imagine feeling that way for months or years on end. Those scars run awfully deep.
Thank you for trusting us with how you're feeling about those things.1 -
On a lighter note, because my family always deals with everything with puckish, if not morbid, humor... told my sister I wanted to be cremated and my ashes scattered. She said she'd dig a hole and stick me in it if she wanted to, because I'd be dead and couldn't do anything about it. My mother's comment, when she was still alive, was just to put her in a Hefty bag out by the curb and let the garbage man take her away. Typical of my family.
Heather, I'm sorry your DH wasn't up to dealing with that conversation. Neither of the men I married have been able to either, though I know it doesn't help. My first husband burst into tears in the middle of a restaurant, and the current and last one just blows it off with a joke. As my sister points out, I won't be able to do anything about it. We did make out wills when we'd been married a short while, because some of the members of my extended family are money-grubbing goobers, so I wanted to be sure that it was clear I wanted my estate to go to my new husband, and the son and daughter he brought with him to the marriage. They're the only children and grandchildren I will ever have, but the law might have seen it differently. Now after seven years together, it's a bit less urgent, but we probably need to redo them.
On the weight side of things, made the mistake of eating a doughnut yesterday morning, and ended up eating carbs and sugar all day, extremely unusual for me. But... done and dusted. Today is another day. The DH is bringing my scale in with me when he comes, and I finally feel as if I've got enough of a handle on things that I can begin working out again Monday morning when the gym reopens.
On a lighter note, overall, a hobby photographer who is the son of my husband's boss took some gorgeous pics out at the ranch of one of the old trucks that's been left on a hillside as yard art, pretty much (Southern joke). Trying to get three of his prints to make a triptych for my DH for his Father's Day, his birthday and our anniversary, all within three days of each other in June. Thought you'd like to see the prints I'm trying to get... shows much the beauty of this country. And the first one shows the constellation Orion, which I've been attached to for many, many years, no matter where I've traveled.
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Love the lighting on the truck pix.
Well I very proudly entered my 1# weight loss after my "maintenance" turned into a 3 # gain! Back in the game and happy for it.
Terrifically busy and grateful for it. DH is recovering from miniscus and doing great at pt. he's a very motivated patient. Don't think he took more than a single Tylenol the whole time What a trooper! DD is in full senior slump waiting for her life to begin. Agh the drama but at least every other day we get along!!
Work conflict with my colleague who did a BAD thing that I can't talk about will have a meeting with HR. I do not expect to be a part of it. And if I am asked I will decline to be dragged into it any further. She has called me a "true blue" friend for life for not calling her out that is not what I am--I am not her friend. She just doesn't know it yet. The blinders are off. She is toxic and though she is my colleague I am no longer going to have personal contact with her. I have my work career to protect and that is what I will focus on from now on.
Phew!!!! long post!!!! Thanks for reading1 -
My phone keeps cutting off my name from my posts. I am going by Karen from ny Cause there are so many Karen's on the posts0
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Oooooohhhh Lisa - what great arty photos! They will look great "curated". :laugh:
DH is ok this morning. I think he woke up early, but he has regained his equilibrium. He did say his tummy was upset because of "last night's trauma", but it was in a light way.
Cooking chilli tonight, because it's the FA Cup on TV. (SOCCER), something simple that doesn't require concentration to eat. :laugh: I will put in a jacket potato for DH. I expect I will sit with him for a change; usually I ban football from the living room, but the FA Cup is a long and venerable tradition.
One of my pesky pounds has gone, so I'm hopeful that the other will disappear before the cruise in 2 weeks. DH has cricket for 4 days, starting tomorrow, so I will have to watch myself. The fridge always starts calling me as soon as DH leaves the house. At least I have some good motivation this time. Want to look my best.
Joyce - I don't think a Living Will has any legal force here either, but at least it's an indication of what we want, if people are dithering.
Love to all. I hope to squeeze an episode of my French TV series in this pm before the Cup. Watched one yesterday. Weird, but good. Four in all. Need to finish it so I can get the CDs back in the post so I can watch the last one of the month before we leave. I get 2 per month from Lovefilm. Saturday is also reading newspaper day. We've done our exercises.
Love to all. Heather UK1 -
Joyce. Blessings. here is a link for Five Wishes printable form:
https://www.pdffiller.com/21962556-ADVANCED-DIRECTIVE-5-WISHESpdf-Five-Wishes---York-Hospital-Various-Fillable-Forms?utm_source=bing&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=Unsorted US Miscellaneous Forms&utm_term=Five Wishes&utm_content=*Five Wishesj
Indiana does not recognize it as a legal document but the hospital may honor it anyway. At the very least it may help you and Charlie personally to fill it out.
I will be thinking of you and Charlie every day.
Karen in Virginia1 -
Hi everyone...I have been soooooo MIA. No particular reason except that I'm exhausted all the time from my new job and the commute (anywheres from 2 hours a day to 4 hours a day depending on traffic) that I am not focusing on much else. What I really need to do is get back into tracking my food. That is always my biggest challenge. I am trying to find the motivation so will try to pop back in each day just for consistency's sake. I'll start with breakfast.
Kimses in MA1
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