married chit-chatters?
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Cutaway_Collar wrote: »I was looking up the internet for baby names at wife's request and there's an article that says women are actually giving khaleesi as a name. I mean how bizarre is that. I feel sorry for those girls.
My husband and I had such a hard time agreeing on the names of our girls... I feel like since I was doing most of the work I should get the final say lmao but we were able to come to an agreement both times!0 -
Hello2
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amcalmond768 wrote: »Cutaway_Collar wrote: »I was looking up the internet for baby names at wife's request and there's an article that says women are actually giving khaleesi as a name. I mean how bizarre is that. I feel sorry for those girls.
My husband and I had such a hard time agreeing on the names of our girls... I feel like since I was doing most of the work I should get the final say lmao but we were able to come to an agreement both times!
Just curious, can you share what you named them? I love hearing of other's name choices for their children.0 -
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amcalmond768 wrote: »Cutaway_Collar wrote: »I was looking up the internet for baby names at wife's request and there's an article that says women are actually giving khaleesi as a name. I mean how bizarre is that. I feel sorry for those girls.
My husband and I had such a hard time agreeing on the names of our girls... I feel like since I was doing most of the work I should get the final say lmao but we were able to come to an agreement both times!
Moral of the story...don't compromise too much! Take time to find a name that you both love!
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Lonestar5715 wrote: »amcalmond768 wrote: »Cutaway_Collar wrote: »I was looking up the internet for baby names at wife's request and there's an article that says women are actually giving khaleesi as a name. I mean how bizarre is that. I feel sorry for those girls.
My husband and I had such a hard time agreeing on the names of our girls... I feel like since I was doing most of the work I should get the final say lmao but we were able to come to an agreement both times!
Just curious, can you share what you named them? I love hearing of other's name choices for their children.
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And writing of names, when I married my first husband, I immediately became a strong Minnesotan. I requested that he help me drop my southern/Midwestern whangy voice, and we worked hard on it -- I soon sounded like most Minnesotans -- the accent I still admire strongly, but I've pretty-well lost it, having moved from there in '81 (was it?). But I digress.
So when our daughter was on the way, he loved the name Jennifer. I didn't. I'd known a problematic girl in high school with that name, and I feared thinking of her every time I called upon our precious daughter. But he loved it, so I reset my mind, and "Jennifer" was chosen. I said, then, that I wanted to name her after a high school girl I strongly admired. That's the way she was named, then.
Then I learned I was pregnant with our son while riding a fair ride, and something was just a little different -- he went blub, blub, blub, blub every time that ride hit a certain point. We wanted a strong Viking warrior name -- important in Minnesota, don'tcha know. We named him Erik. and we gave him my first husband's middle name, which was also his father's middle name. I wanted to give him two middle names, my husband's first and middle names, but he didn't want that. He said that this caused problems in his family when his older brother was named after his father, so he didn't want Erik to have the same problems.
Then, when our children were ages 5 and 2, my husband was killed in an airplane accident. Soon, I wanted desperately for our son to have his name. The problems that made my husband not want that were gone, with his being gone. So I had our son's name changed, retaining the name, Erik, with my first husband's name as our son's two middle names.
A lot of thought often goes into naming a child. Special people are strongly recalled. Hopes and dreams are evident.
And our names strongly shape us.
For myself, I was given a hideous first name at birth -- a name I hated from my first memories. When I started 4th grade in a new school, I announced that I would no longer answer to my first name; everyone was to call me by my middle name, and this was the name I used in school. As an adult, before I returned to college, I decided to drop my first name legally, and Raina became my first name. Years later, I also legally dropped my old middle name. I love my names now. And since I named myself, Raina does not carry the commonly accepted meaning; it means "the soft rains that fall upon the redwood forest."4 -
Raina, thank you for sharing all of that!1
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Hey folks! Celebrated 31 years last night with my love, on our official anniversary date. But for fun we did a Mud Run this last weekend and that was the best. Secret FOR US has been humor, personal space, mutual respect of our individual selves, intimacy as a PRIORITY and keep it fun and we have a rule: MONEY is not something to fight about. EVER.3
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projectsix wrote: »Question!
If all you married folk ever separate/divorce from your spouses do you see yourself getting together w/ someone else or flying solo indefinitely?
Can't imagine ever breaking up with my husband. Been with him for 18 years. But, if I ended up single I would meet someone else. I am not an alone kind of person. I am used to bonding and being part of a partnership. Just my personality type. I like companionship, affection, etc. But, I wouldn't become part of a partnership unless they are as wonderful as my husband. Though, I would date until I met the right person. Glad I don't have to date. But, I would if I was single. I would date men and women.2 -
projectsix wrote: »Question!
If all you married folk ever separate/divorce from your spouses do you see yourself getting together w/ someone else or flying solo indefinitely?
If I were to speak now I would say never married again, but at 47 I have learned never to say never. I would definitely be single for an extended time....whatever that might end up looking like.1 -
projectsix wrote: »Question!
If all you married folk ever separate/divorce from your spouses do you see yourself getting together w/ someone else or flying solo indefinitely?
I would remain single. My husband was my high school sweetheart but my family moved senior year, separating us. We both married & divorced and both had 1 child - boy for me, girl for him. The year of our 20th reunion we reconnected. We married just over 1 year later. I do not think that I would have ever married again otherwise; I had been single for more than 13 years at that point. I love my husband, but I was very comfortable being single and would not wish to marry again.1 -
BinaryPulsar wrote: »Raina, thank you for sharing all of that!
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@thenananator
Well, it's no wonder, then, why you've stayed together 31 years!1 -
projectsix wrote: »Question!
If all you married folk ever separate/divorce from your spouses do you see yourself getting together w/ someone else or flying solo indefinitely?
When my first husband died, I tried some dating but soon got very turned off. I thought I would stay single for life, but 9 years after he was gone, an old boyfriend from my teen years was widowed. I'll admit it: I reluctantly married him a year later, but it ended up being one of the best decisions of my life. Regardless, should he ever be gone? No. I don't think I would remarry. There are a lot of good men out there, but I found the two best. I would not take that chance again.3 -
Yeah. I don't know. It's difficult to say. If dating is awful and I don't meet someone wonderful like my husband. Then yeah, I would stay single. Definitely.1
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projectsix wrote: »Question!
If all you married folk ever separate/divorce from your spouses do you see yourself getting together w/ someone else or flying solo indefinitely?
Single for sure, marriage is exhausting, hahaa. It's a lot more fun being selfish in some respects whereas marriage is very much an "us" rather than a "me."
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BinaryPulsar wrote: »Raina, thank you for sharing all of that!
I agree, thanks for sharing Raina!!2 -
amcalmond768 wrote: »Lonestar5715 wrote: »amcalmond768 wrote: »Cutaway_Collar wrote: »I was looking up the internet for baby names at wife's request and there's an article that says women are actually giving khaleesi as a name. I mean how bizarre is that. I feel sorry for those girls.
My husband and I had such a hard time agreeing on the names of our girls... I feel like since I was doing most of the work I should get the final say lmao but we were able to come to an agreement both times!
Just curious, can you share what you named them? I love hearing of other's name choices for their children.
I think those are both quite original. Thanks for satisfying my curiosity.0 -
projectsix wrote: »Question!
If all you married folk ever separate/divorce from your spouses do you see yourself getting together w/ someone else or flying solo indefinitely?
A good question! I am answering only because although I am technically married, that is about to end within the next couple of months.
I know beyond a doubt that I will enter into another long-term relationship even if it doesn't turn out to be marriage.
To me life is much more rich and vibrant when shared with another person. As much as I enjoy short periods of solitude I also recognize my need to be significant in someone else's life.5 -
Lonestar5715 wrote: »projectsix wrote: »Question!
If all you married folk ever separate/divorce from your spouses do you see yourself getting together w/ someone else or flying solo indefinitely?
A good question! I am answering only because although I am technically married, that is about to end within the next couple of months.
I know beyond a doubt that I will enter into another long-term relationship even if it doesn't turn out to be marriage.
To me life is much more rich and vibrant when shared with another person. As much as I enjoy short periods of solitude I also recognize my need to be significant in someone else's life.
Definitely agree. I like a little alone time. But, the give and take of a shared relationship isn't difficult for me. I prefer it and find it more enjoyable than being alone. But, I am not saying it's universally better. Not at all. Different people are different and prefer different things. I like this. Maybe because I work so well with my husband. I can sometimes interact with people and can imagine how difficult it would be to be in a partnership with them. Not because there is anything wrong with them. I like them as a friend. I just see how our styles of living wouldn't mesh together well. In dance I also love to do duets.1 -
Lonestar5715 wrote: »I agree, thanks for sharing Raina!!
Awww. Thank you.1 -
At my age, if I were without my husband, I would likely sell the house and move into a little place for seniors. OR a tiny house where the grounds are kept up by someone else. That way, I would have neighbors to chat with, but my place would be private -- my own.2
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RainaProske wrote: »At my age, if I were without my husband, I would likely sell the house and move into a little place for seniors. OR a tiny house where the grounds are kept up by someone else. That way, I would have neighbors to chat with, but my place would be private -- my own.
That's a good plan!1 -
projectsix wrote: »Question!
If all you married folk ever separate/divorce from your spouses do you see yourself getting together w/ someone else or flying solo indefinitely?
I, too, can't imagine my world without my hubs, but if he were to leave me, I'd focus on myself for awhile; travel, explore, etc. and let my next relationship fall into place (rather than seeking one out). I have told myself that I will never, again, fall in love with someone with children from a previous marriage.4 -
RainaProske wrote: »At my age, if I were without my husband, I would likely sell the house and move into a little place for seniors. OR a tiny house where the grounds are kept up by someone else. That way, I would have neighbors to chat with, but my place would be private -- my own.
I agree 100 % I would never marry again and I would live in a place where someone else does all the yard work, cleaning, cooking.2 -
amcalmond768 wrote: »Cutaway_Collar wrote: »I was looking up the internet for baby names at wife's request and there's an article that says women are actually giving khaleesi as a name. I mean how bizarre is that. I feel sorry for those girls.
My husband and I had such a hard time agreeing on the names of our girls... I feel like since I was doing most of the work I should get the final say lmao but we were able to come to an agreement both times!
Picking names is tough. We both went through a baby name book individually and made a list. Then compared to see which ones we had that were common. Surprisingly, only one similarity, which is what we named our daughter.
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Guns_N_Buns wrote: »projectsix wrote: »Question!
If all you married folk ever separate/divorce from your spouses do you see yourself getting together w/ someone else or flying solo indefinitely?
I have told myself that I will never, again, fall in love with someone with children from a previous marriage.
You make a good point that often there are children that are part of the decision to be with another person following a divorce. I am currently seeing a friend who has a hormonal 15 yo daughter and a special needs son who is 17. He will most likely be dependent on her the rest of his or her life.
That being said, part of what attracts me to her is her deep love and the sacrifice she makes for her children. It is indicative of who she is in her nature and on our first meeting she was upfront about her son. Her son and I have a neat relationship already and has broken many of the pre-conceptions I had of special needs people.
Truthfully, I find her children much easier to see in the future picture than I can her ex husband which is yet another part of a second relationship. The bottom line to me is every relationship requires enduring patience and compromise and the realization that others are probably doing their best to put up with us too. But I can also completely understand the challenge and complications extended family brings to the equation.5
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