What's a "normal" love life?

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Replies

  • Just_say_jess
    Just_say_jess Posts: 19 Member
    You all suck. :(

    ^^^^this!
  • mestacy010
    mestacy010 Posts: 577 Member
    So I've noticing this is a pretty open group, so I thought I'd ask for some feedback. I know married couples joke about not having sex, but seriously, what's normal? Weekly? Monthly? YEARLY?

    My ex husband would only sleep with me every few months, when for me, I wanted it twice a day or at least daily....turns out he was having an affair....
  • MrsSenecal
    MrsSenecal Posts: 312 Member
    Daily, and we have been together years. And yes I have two kids, a full time job, work out, etc.
  • allaboutthecake
    allaboutthecake Posts: 1,535 Member
    Ugh...just celebrated my 20th anniversary (okay, so there was no celebration and all and barely any acknowledgement) and for the past few years he has had NO sex drive while mine has gone through the roof. I take that back - he has a sex drive, he's just not interested in *me*. We've had dry spells of 3+ years at one point. Correctly working on one of 6+ months. I've moved on...

    That's so sad! You are such an attractive, youthful looking young woman in the prime of her life. Your husband is a ****head for not paying you attention. Not knowing your whole story, I shall just say don't wait forever....life is too short :flowerforyou:

    (edited to add: I did not say *kitten* ...head... on this, I said d i c k)
  • Perplexities
    Perplexities Posts: 612 Member
    5x a day.

    This.
  • Zombriana
    Zombriana Posts: 764 Member
    I keep track on this app I have. 9-10 times a month. :|
  • operation_cute
    operation_cute Posts: 588 Member
    As long as you're both happy and satisfied, that's "normal". For a lot of couples, it varies. For me and my husband it can range from every single day, sometimes several times a day, on down to once every other week.

    ^^This :)
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 18,206 Member
    I thought getting married meant I didn't have to anymore??!!

    J/K 2-3 times a week, generally. Sometimes more, sometimes less.
  • After 24 years of marriage, we average 3-4 times a week. During calving season when our work day is from 6:00am until 12:00am, those numbers go down.
  • JustCallMe_Tanya_Eh
    JustCallMe_Tanya_Eh Posts: 954 Member
    Adleast once a day and 2 times on Sunday
  • rob32768
    rob32768 Posts: 505
    Adleast once a day and 2 times on Sunday
    So much for Sunday being the day of rest ...
  • mestacy010
    mestacy010 Posts: 577 Member
    5x a day.

    This.

    If only men could keep up with "this"
  • Kindone
    Kindone Posts: 138 Member
    Just.. constantly.
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  • britttttx3
    britttttx3 Posts: 458
    5x a day.

    This.

    If only men could keep up with "this"


    Some can keep up with "this".
  • mestacy010
    mestacy010 Posts: 577 Member
    5x a day.

    This.

    If only men could keep up with "this"


    Some can keep up with "this".

    Lol!
  • AndiGirl70
    AndiGirl70 Posts: 542 Member
    I can relate to an earlier post on this thread. After celebrating 20yrs of marriage and 4 children later (aged 5-15) I can say my husband and I are so far off the bell curves its crazy! I'm 43 and he's 54 and honest to goodness we have uninhibited sex at least 5 days a week. We are experiencing what I'm calling our "sexual renaissance". We've gone through all the phases in a married sex life including a 3yr dry spell. I can honestly say we are having the best sex ever, bar none. The key? Lose the inhibitions, communicate your needs/wants/fantasies openly and honestly and don't be afraid to try new things in and out of the bedroom to keep it interesting. I can also tell you a happy, active sex life extends its feel good mood to all areas of your life.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    I was married for over 9 years, with my ex 10 years, and our typical sex frequency after the first 2 months of dating was once a month in the spring & summer, once every 2 months the rest of the year. Not even kidding.

    I would not be ok with that. Everyone's sex drive is different, yes. But for me, 2X a week would be ABSOLUTE MINIMUM acceptable now, unless there were serious health issues involved.

    I've now been with my fiance for a little over 1 year and we don't live together yet but when we're together (Fri, Sat & Sun of every week) it is at minimum 2X per day. ALWAYS! Often it's 3-4X per day, 2-3 of the days per week that we are together.

    Even when we are together for 10 days in a row we have never missed a single day, except for when he had to abstain for a week due to having a vasectomy so I would no longer need to use birth control! :-)
  • Faery_Dust
    Faery_Dust Posts: 246 Member
    We go through patches where it might only be once a month and other times it would be 4 - 5 x a week. I've been going through some treatment at the hospital where I had to come off birth control pills and was told we shouldn't even risk sex with a condom until I was through the treatment. Which of course just makes you want it all the more lol. But I guess you don't have to go all the way to still have fun :) Actually which is something that has been a part of our lives normally, even when it has only been once a month, there have probably been a few days where we would fool around.

    And honestly for me, as long as we are both loving towards each other the rest of the time, kiss and cuddle whenever we get the chance, hold hands when out and about, and curl up in each others arms when watching a film on the sofa..... then even during the once a month times it's still good :)
  • battyg13
    battyg13 Posts: 508 Member
    As often as possible worked for me in the past.

    my often as possible was more than her often as possible though. :-(
  • mcibty
    mcibty Posts: 1,252 Member
    As long as you're both happy and satisfied, that's "normal". For a lot of couples, it varies. For me and my husband it can range from every single day, sometimes several times a day, on down to once every other week.

    This. Normal is whatever you're happy with.
  • anemoneprose
    anemoneprose Posts: 1,805 Member
    So I've noticing this is a pretty open group, so I thought I'd ask for some feedback. I know married couples joke about not having sex, but seriously, what's normal? Weekly? Monthly? YEARLY?

    Ha, sounds like not enough for you?

    Get him to start working out, should help at least a bit.
  • bobf279
    bobf279 Posts: 342 Member
    I can't remember
  • FJMilner
    FJMilner Posts: 407
    You all suck. :(

    As part of the sex?? :wink:
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    So I've noticing this is a pretty open group, so I thought I'd ask for some feedback. I know married couples joke about not having sex, but seriously, what's normal? Weekly? Monthly? YEARLY?

    kinda depends on circumstances, kids etc, but the norm for the husband and I is sex once a week and a hand job!!
  • cherryd69
    cherryd69 Posts: 340
    I didnt know we had to have a certain amount to be classified as 'normal'

    I have a low sex drive, husbands is high..... we have it when i feel like it :ohwell:


    As far as im aware we are both happy, i say this because i know he would tell me if he wasnt.

    Knowing his high drive i have brought it up on occasion due to my own guilt (i say guilt cause i cant think of the word i want to use haha) OH has told me many times, its not the quantity its the quality. This dosnt always ease my thoughts and i have wondered many times if he will go elsewhere for a refill, but instead of worrying about it i tell him, he always reassures me.
  • Y2KBABE
    Y2KBABE Posts: 14 Member
    Depending on where you both are in life and "in life" your shagging patterns may (but not necessarily go like this)

    Making babies --
    Like you were trying to save the world

    Kids very young --
    ehhh never. FFS, there is sleep to be caught up on!!

    Kids watching Thomas --
    Once a week very quietly and 5 days of giggling between yourselves afterwards


    Kids staying with grandparents --
    Once a day at least

    One of your parents pass away --
    Sod all for a few weeks and then a few subsequent weeks of shagging like the survival of the human race depends on it

    You / he / both of you get a promotion --
    2 nights of the wild WILD thing then a week of nothing as you stay up late figuring out what to do with the money

    Buy a house --
    shag

    Sell a house --
    fret (so no shagging)

    Of course everyone is different so your responses may be completely the opposite. My point is 'there is no normal'. There are just people.

    So in your world there are no married couples without children ?
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    Yeah.....we have issues. :ohwell: I've tried to talk to him about it, telling him with my self esteem issues I don't feel wanted or attractive & he gets defensive & it goes nowhere.

    He don't wanna hear dat! He wants you to pull his pants down and get busy :bigsmile:

    Pretend you have self esteem. Then maybe you will acquire it.

    I have such a fear of rejection. I just can't. I know I shouldn't feel that way but he chooses to avoid me so it's hard to suck it up & go for it.

    Jump his bones girlfriend...I'm sure he would love it if you did!

    this!

    he probably has a fear of rejection too - thats why he avoids you, which then makes the situation worse...

    crack open a bottle of wine, and lock him in the bedroom!
  • Chadomaniac
    Chadomaniac Posts: 1,785 Member
    After 13 years, 2 small kids, depends on how tired we are. So we can do nothing for a month other than sleep, or have sex about 3-4 times a week. daily in the first year lol

    This Honestly makes me sad i wont lie
  • Chadomaniac
    Chadomaniac Posts: 1,785 Member
    I'm the oddball. Married 18 years. We get it done 3-5 times a week. At least one is of the epic throwdown variety. My wife is a trooper. :bigsmile: :wink:

    My drive quite high, much more so than hers though she's likely still higher than average. I get suicidal after 48 hours without.

    Edit: oh, and four kids, including a couple of teens.

    This gives me hope
    Salute bro.