What's a "normal" love life?

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  • laddyboy
    laddyboy Posts: 1,565 Member
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    I've been married to the same wonderful woman for 17 years and I still want her like I did all those years ago. We normally were 2-3 times a week until she started with the mid life change. Now we are once a week at the least. Hopefully after she is on the other side of her female issue we can kick it up a little. I'll be honest, I'm wanting the 2-3 times weekly but I love her so much I'll wait it out. If we don't get back to the 2-3 times a week I'll still have her.
  • annamc18
    annamc18 Posts: 198 Member
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    I'm the oddball. Married 18 years. We get it done 3-5 times a week. At least one is of the epic throwdown variety. My wife is a trooper. :bigsmile: :wink:

    My drive quite high, much more so than hers though she's likely still higher than average. I get suicidal after 48 hours without.

    Edit: oh, and four kids, including a couple of teens.

    ^THIS! HA!

    I have been with my BF for 6 years next week, and we haven't slowed down one bit since we've been dating. We probably average 5-7 days a week, but anything less than 3x a week and I start having issues lol. No kids yet, but I don't think that would slow us down much either lol.......OH! and epic throwdown variety sex is often the best :bigsmile: :wink:
  • betteringmyselfeachday
    betteringmyselfeachday Posts: 99
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    Ideally for me it would be a couple times a week. However, my soon-to-be husband is a farmer which means crazy hours in the spring and the fall. Sometimes work makes it lucky to have it 1 a month. I hate it when we have it maybe monthly, but I think every relationship goes thru a dry spell at some point.

    if this is an ongoing thing, then I think it deserves a discussion. Try to spice things up!!
  • Orfygirl
    Orfygirl Posts: 274 Member
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    Normal is whatever normal is for you. My husband and I have been together for over 15 years and we have 4 children. We ARE madly in love with each other even though our sex life can range from several times a day to once every couple of months. Even though we can go long stretches without sex at times, we do substitute it with other means of intimacy such as cuddling and holding each others' hands. My children joke with my husband and I saying that we "suck each others' faces off" because we just kiss a lot and that is ok if kissing is all we need for intimacy at that time. We are not only partners in the bedroom but we are partners for life, we are best friends and we enjoy spending as much time together as possible and every minute doesn't have to be sexual. It really depends on the couple whether or not you need actual sex all of the time to keep your relationship going. Just because you are having a lot of sex doesn't mean that your relationship will work outside of the bedroom and vice versa. "Normal" is what "normal" is for you and only you.
  • AndiGirl70
    AndiGirl70 Posts: 542 Member
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    Haven't pulled out the "swing" in over a year.

    Time to dust off that swing and play school reccess !
  • steveinct
    steveinct Posts: 140 Member
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    All the ladies who are saying "multiple times a day", When do you have time for a job (or is your man a two pump chump)??
  • Jennisin1
    Jennisin1 Posts: 574 Member
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    Ideally for me would be night and morning.... with occasional randomness thrown in. I have discovered the least I'm able to accept is 3 times a week.
  • Jennisin1
    Jennisin1 Posts: 574 Member
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    All the ladies who are saying "multiple times a day", When do you have time for a job (or is your man a two pump chump)??

    I enjoy a longer session at night and a quicky (10 minutes give or take) in the morning. I don't watch tv anymore, which frees up my calendar for more enjoyable experiences. Its amazing how much time you have when you reorganize your priorities.
  • _Krys10_
    _Krys10_ Posts: 1,234 Member
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    All the ladies who are saying "multiple times a day", When do you have time for a job (or is your man a two pump chump)??

    8 hour work day leaves 16 hours for fun
  • Krizzo87
    Krizzo87 Posts: 14,186 Member
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    There are basically three stages in the sex life of a married couple:

    1st stage is "Everywhere Sex" -- You can't wait to get your hands on each other. On the kitchen counter, the couch, in the backyard, garage. There are no boundaries.

    2nd stage is "Bedroom Sex" -- You're iin bed; you're both awake; you figure "What the heck. Let's give it a tumble."

    3rd stage is "Hallway Sex" -- You pass each other in the Hall, look at each other and say "*kitten* You".

    My wife and I have been together almost 25 years. We're somewhere between 1st and 2nd stage. We still enjoy sex together regularly, but we're not trying to find new yoga positions, so we can bring the weight machine into our repertoire.

    Haven't pulled out the "swing" in over a year.

    I would have to say I'm in stage 2, possibly creeping up on stage 3 on occassion. :laugh:
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,741 Member
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    All the ladies who are saying "multiple times a day", When do you have time for a job (or is your man a two pump chump)??

    I enjoy a longer session at night and a quicky (10 minutes give or take) in the morning. I don't watch tv anymore, which frees up my calendar for more enjoyable experiences. Its amazing how much time you have when you reorganize your priorities.

    This!!! My fiance and I do not even have cable and sometimes our TV is turned off for over a month at a time. Also, no kids and never will have kids.
  • Kai81109
    Kai81109 Posts: 52 Member
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    I would say as often as you two can fit it in. Only been married 5 yrs it slowed down some from the first year but we have a soon to be 4 year old. It varies some times once every other week if were super busy if not then a couple times a day or at least once a day. You gotta keep it fresh and exciting though or it gets boring.
  • Mainebikerchick
    Mainebikerchick Posts: 1,573 Member
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    Pretty much daily and I've been with my hubby for 12 1/2 years and have been married for 3....so to those who say marriage wrecks the sex....I say it didn't do a DAMN thing to mine except make it better!!!!!! :bigsmile:
  • MaritaD
    MaritaD Posts: 178 Member
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    You all suck. :(

    Yes sucking is a part of it :) hehehe
  • steveinct
    steveinct Posts: 140 Member
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    All the ladies who are saying "multiple times a day", When do you have time for a job (or is your man a two pump chump)??

    I enjoy a longer session at night and a quicky (10 minutes give or take) in the morning. I don't watch tv anymore, which frees up my calendar for more enjoyable experiences. Its amazing how much time you have when you reorganize your priorities.

    I would have had trouble finishing in 10 minutes when I was a teenager, now I am in my 40's. If I don't have 30+ minutes, I don't even bother and even @ 30min I consider it a quicky and feel a little rushed. Everyone is different though. Also, it is amazing how many people on here must not know what the word "foreplay" means since some people are claiming 5 times a day. I'm guessing their love life is more like grope, grab, tug, go, pump pump, done (X 5).
  • BarbellApprentice
    BarbellApprentice Posts: 486 Member
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    As others noted, the time frame can vary and still be normal. However, if he is never or rarely initiating or pursuing you, then that is a major red flag.
  • saxmaniac
    saxmaniac Posts: 1,133 Member
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    Typical is something like just over 2x a week.

    Aparently, I am very, very abnormal.

    http://www.kinseyinstitute.org/resources/FAQ.html#frequency
  • Cliffslosinit
    Cliffslosinit Posts: 5,044 Member
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    Morning, nooners, quickies....anytime:tongue:
  • NKfanKelli
    NKfanKelli Posts: 44
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    Wow! This blew up overnight! Some posts made me laugh, some were sadly very relatable, and some were sadly unrelatable! :ohwell:
  • Jennisin1
    Jennisin1 Posts: 574 Member
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    All the ladies who are saying "multiple times a day", When do you have time for a job (or is your man a two pump chump)??

    I enjoy a longer session at night and a quicky (10 minutes give or take) in the morning. I don't watch tv anymore, which frees up my calendar for more enjoyable experiences. Its amazing how much time you have when you reorganize your priorities.

    I would have had trouble finishing in 10 minutes when I was a teenager, now I am in my 40's. If I don't have 30+ minutes, I don't even bother and even @ 30min I consider it a quicky and feel a little rushed. Everyone is different though. Also, it is amazing how many people on here must not know what the word "foreplay" means since some people are claiming 5 times a day. I'm guessing their love life is more like grope, grab, tug, go, pump pump, done (X 5).

    Well, I don't have that problem... I can have 1 (more sometimes) in 10 minutes.... so what if it isn't for you? and I'm good with an hour or more at night. I've been with guys who need more time.. they had no problem with short play and considered it extented foreplay for when we had more time later. I mean you can't exactly take 40 minutes in the dressing room.... O_o

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