You are not just "weak" or "lazy". Food can be an ADDICTION.
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Replies
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paperpudding wrote: »jennifer_417 wrote: »I just want to make a couple points here.
1. Most of the "no food is bad" argument is directed to those who constantly fall off the wagon because they've convinced themselves that all of the food they love is "bad," and think they have to restrict themselves to celery and bottled water. It's not, at least that I've seen, directed towards those who simply cannot moderate their behavior towards certain foods. For instance, I firmly believe one can eat anything and lose weight, but I know that if I bring chips and french onion dip into the house, I'll have it eaten by the next day. So I don't buy them, because I can't moderate my behavior towards them. It doesn't make them "bad."
2. By the clinical definition of "addiction," it's possibly be entirely psychologically addicted to a substance, so that no physical withdraw symptoms occur when the person stops it. So, given that, I do believe that people can be addicted to sugar, carbs, food in general, etc. And the reason people don't sell their bodies on the streets to get it is that it can be cheaply and readily purchased at the store.
That makes them bad for you because you can't control yourself with them. So you stay away from them. If they're not good for your overall health or diet then what are they? Bad is the opposite of good. For instance, I love milky ways, I can still technically eat a Milky Way on my diet but it wouldn't be the best decision with the calories I'm allowed each day to eat a 280+ calorie candy bar that has no nutritional value and will not fill me up. I'll probably just be hungry afterwards and won't have has many calories remaining for a decent meal. In my opinion, a candy bar like that would be bad for me and the success of my diet. It wouldn't be the smartest way to spend my calories for the day. Now maybe I eat something as a substitute to get a sugar fix, something that will be better for my success on my diet. one thing is a good choice, one thing is bad choice. But if you are somebody that feels you might not be successful on a diet if you look at food this way, then that's you. But my original point was that a lot of people on here don't consider the fact that many people do look at food this way and they just like to definitively say to others "there are no bad foods, eat what you want." Which, in my opinion is wrong, because it's not helpful to people that can't eat that way because moderation and self control with certain foods is not everyone's strong point.
Aren't you the poster who started threads about Which is worse: burger or pizza? and Should I eat toast or cereal?
That sort of polarised thinking about individual foods is not effective.
Your diet as a whole, ie not segregating foods into good and bad without context, is the way to look at it.
My apologies if you were not OP of those threads and I am confusing you with somebody else.
I'm not the OP of those threads. But saying my individual view on those foods is not effective is exactly what I'm talking about in the previous points I've made on this thread. Instead of you saying, "I don't like to label foods as good or bad for my own reasons." You just immediately tell other people who might have a labeling foods mindset that they are wrong and will fail by doing so. Since you don't know other mindsets about dieting you shouldn't be definitively telling people that their way is wrong. I'm not going to explain myself for the hundredth time of why I believe that commenters giving advice should not say "no foods are bad" and "eat whatever you want." You can go back and read my answers if you so wish.
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DisruptedMatrix wrote: »Did you see that thread where a woman's husband thought she was ungrateful because he sabatoged her with chocolates and she asked advice on how to make this boundary clear to him and she was demoralized to the point that she hasn't been back on by people telling her she should thank him for chocolates and have willpower?!?!?! RAGE
Yes, there seem to be a lot of missy know-it-alls on these boards that have amazing will power. Almost makes you wonder how they got overweight to begin with right? Since they know everything about dieting and eating healthy they should just all get together and write a book called "You're doing it wrong!" Or "How hard is this to understand?" Or how about "You weak minded imbecile:Eat What You Want and Still Lose Weight."
What they don't get is they may think they are trying to help but they don't say things in a helpful tone of voice. They will state things so matter-of-factly, instead of phrasing their comments in terms of what works for them in regards to what they answering on. Like I've been saying, I label foods as bad or good, some others on here are clearly against that way of thinking towards a diet. I respect that and don't turn around and tell them "well, you are wrong." If you are going to question my way of thinking I'm going to just state my side and explain my way of thinking, but it's like there are people on here that can't accept that and will fight you to the death over your opinion until they scare you off the boards for life.
Or how about the people to which you say a very clear and concise statement to and they completely flip it around? Example:
Me:I like red hats
MFP commenter: Not everyone likes red hats!!!!
Me: I never said everyone did.
MFP Commenter: well, you implied it!
Me: um...what? Can I mail you some Twinkies?
Ok, I know I'm getting silly now, but I felt the need to get that off my chest. Let the crucifixion begin!
I wish these boards could be a more comfortable, light hearted, fun place to be, but much of the time they are not.
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DisruptedMatrix wrote: »Did you see that thread where a woman's husband thought she was ungrateful because he sabatoged her with chocolates and she asked advice on how to make this boundary clear to him and she was demoralized to the point that she hasn't been back on by people telling her she should thank him for chocolates and have willpower?!?!?! RAGE
Yes, there seem to be a lot of missy know-it-alls on these boards that have amazing will power. Almost makes you wonder how they got overweight to begin with right? Since they know everything about dieting and eating healthy they should just all get together and write a book called "You're doing it wrong!" Or "How hard is this to understand?" Or how about "You weak minded imbecile:Eat What You Want and Still Lose Weight."
What they don't get is they may think they are trying to help but they don't say things in a helpful tone of voice. They will state things so matter-of-factly, instead of phrasing their comments in terms of what works for them in regards to what they answering on. Like I've been saying, I label foods as bad or good, some others on here are clearly against that way of thinking towards a diet. I respect that and don't turn around and tell them "well, you are wrong." If you are going to question my way of thinking I'm going to just state my side and explain my way of thinking, but it's like there are people on here that can't accept that and will fight you to the death over your opinion until they scare you off the boards for life.
Or how about the people to which you say a very clear and concise statement to and they completely flip it around? Example:
Me:I like red hats
MFP commenter: Not everyone likes red hats!!!!
Me: I never said everyone did.
MFP Commenter: well, you implied it!
Me: um...what? Can I mail you some Twinkies?
Ok, I know I'm getting silly now, but I felt the need to get that off my chest. Let the crucifixion begin!
I wish these boards could be a more comfortable, light hearted, fun place to be, but much of the time they are not.
You sound quite angry. In the end, we all have to lose our weight, our way. For me, losing 80 lbs took willpower. It took saying no to the second cupcake, even though I thought I needed it.
For you, it may be different.
You do you!6 -
DisruptedMatrix wrote: »Did you see that thread where a woman's husband thought she was ungrateful because he sabatoged her with chocolates and she asked advice on how to make this boundary clear to him and she was demoralized to the point that she hasn't been back on by people telling her she should thank him for chocolates and have willpower?!?!?! RAGE
Yes, there seem to be a lot of missy know-it-alls on these boards that have amazing will power. Almost makes you wonder how they got overweight to begin with right? Since they know everything about dieting and eating healthy they should just all get together and write a book called "You're doing it wrong!" Or "How hard is this to understand?" Or how about "You weak minded imbecile:Eat What You Want and Still Lose Weight."
What they don't get is they may think they are trying to help but they don't say things in a helpful tone of voice. They will state things so matter-of-factly, instead of phrasing their comments in terms of what works for them in regards to what they answering on. Like I've been saying, I label foods as bad or good, some others on here are clearly against that way of thinking towards a diet. I respect that and don't turn around and tell them "well, you are wrong." If you are going to question my way of thinking I'm going to just state my side and explain my way of thinking, but it's like there are people on here that can't accept that and will fight you to the death over your opinion until they scare you off the boards for life.
Or how about the people to which you say a very clear and concise statement to and they completely flip it around? Example:
Me:I like red hats
MFP commenter: Not everyone likes red hats!!!!
Me: I never said everyone did.
MFP Commenter: well, you implied it!
Me: um...what? Can I mail you some Twinkies?
Ok, I know I'm getting silly now, but I felt the need to get that off my chest. Let the crucifixion begin!
I wish these boards could be a more comfortable, light hearted, fun place to be, but much of the time they are not.
No these boards are more sycophantic, couch your comments in disneyfied terms otherwise people will get their knickers in a twist. But as long as you do that you can say whatever you want. And make up whatever facts suit you and you're fine.
The way to deal with any Internet forum is to read all posts in a muppet voice of your choosing
And don't infer offence where none is implied
The words "you are a..." generally are the precursor to an insult. The words "that is a " generally relate to a concept
It's an easy distinction to make for most adults
And it's basic child development...disapprove the action not the child
Edit to add...oh and if you really can't stomach the way, or the things, that specific posters post then use the ignore button...it makes it so much more pleasant to not have to continually face specific comments that some people repeat ad nauseum, particularly when they have been effectively rebutted over and over again.2 -
Therealobi1 wrote: »]The younger generation today is obsessed with the idea of being "triggered" and having the world creating safe spaces for them
I understand this but they can't take the blame all by themselves. surely the older generation around them have helped create this. Over protecting child to protect them from what might happen etc
BTW. When we are saying younger generation what age are we talking out of curiosity
Whoever's taken over Tumblr. And academia.
And you are right. The coddling of children and the culture of participation trophies is to blame.
I've long noticed the trend of pendulum swings. Society seems to over-correct deficiencies. Take the story of my rape. I had some ... ahem... lovely... moments with the police during questioning. We've gone from blaming rape victims to making a mockery of rape by crying "rape culture" over the stupidest things. At some point, I'm sure we'll settle in some middle ground of sensible handling of the issue.
I am hoping the same happens with this whole coddling issue. We've gone from "toughen up buttercup" which was often a bit cruel to those of a more sensitive nature, to over-protecting children. There's a middle ground to be found. Hopefully, we'll get there.6 -
DisruptedMatrix wrote: »Did you see that thread where a woman's husband thought she was ungrateful because he sabatoged her with chocolates and she asked advice on how to make this boundary clear to him and she was demoralized to the point that she hasn't been back on by people telling her she should thank him for chocolates and have willpower?!?!?! RAGE
He didn't sabotage her though. This is where personal responsibility comes in. He didn't force feed them to her. She chose to eat them. You seem to think she is totally helpless and a victim. That's more damaging to her psyche than pointing out that she has the power to stand up and say no and have other options. I guess you blame stores and fast food restaurants for sabotaging people? As I said earlier the victim mindset is so rampant that it is sickening. Quit being a victim and blaming everyone else. Nothing will change until you stop doing that. How will you ever lose weight or whatever if it's never your fault and totally out of your control.9 -
DisruptedMatrix wrote: »
As I said, I'm a drug addict. I find the claim of "sugar is addictive" when many of the addiction criteria aren't met. Food tastes good. Sweet food tastes better. Doesn't make food or sugar addictive. I use my own behavior to check addiction:
1. Would you break the law to get your fix?
2. Would anything with a similar drug profile work to give you your fix?
You also miss the big point of PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY. Yeah, people eat themselves to death and/or to the point of self-immobilization. Doesn't make sugar addictive.
At one point, I thought I was a food addict. Then I realized, after a lot of self-examination, that my overeating was me covering for other mental and emotional problems in my life. When I dealt with the problems, oh lookie-lookie, my "food addiction" went away.
Good points. I think there are a lot of people who over eat and have dealt with weight issues their whole life can probably trace it back to mental or emotional issues. I know I am definitely an emotional/stress eater. It makes me feeler better to not think about eating healthy and to just eat what I want when I'm down or stressed. But I'm working on breaking that habit.
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snickerscharlie wrote: »DisruptedMatrix wrote: »and let's not forget the other factors involved... remember the girl who is constantly intensely hungry because of a medical condition? http://abcnews.go.com/2020/video/2020-rare-condition-makes-kids-intensely-hungry-247-25005190
she is gaining weight on 900 calories a day.
She has been so desperate she ate dog food.
Not sure what a so-called "bizarre medical mystery" has to do with the topic at hand? <confused>
Nevermind. Getting into Prader-Willi isn't worth it.1 -
DisruptedMatrix wrote: »
As I said, I'm a drug addict. I find the claim of "sugar is addictive" when many of the addiction criteria aren't met. Food tastes good. Sweet food tastes better. Doesn't make food or sugar addictive. I use my own behavior to check addiction:
1. Would you break the law to get your fix?
2. Would anything with a similar drug profile work to give you your fix?
You also miss the big point of PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY. Yeah, people eat themselves to death and/or to the point of self-immobilization. Doesn't make sugar addictive.
At one point, I thought I was a food addict. Then I realized, after a lot of self-examination, that my overeating was me covering for other mental and emotional problems in my life. When I dealt with the problems, oh lookie-lookie, my "food addiction" went away.
Good points. I think there are a lot of people who over eat and have dealt with weight issues their whole life can probably trace it back to mental or emotional issues. I know I am definitely an emotional/stress eater. It makes me feeler better to not think about eating healthy and to just eat what I want when I'm down or stressed. But I'm working on breaking that habit.
This is awesome! This is a huge breakthrough that you recognize the problem and are working on fixing it
I am not 100% recovered from my eating disorder but once I worked through things and figured out why I did certain behaviors it helped a lot. 1 -
JustMissTracy wrote: »DisruptedMatrix wrote: »Did you see that thread where a woman's husband thought she was ungrateful because he sabatoged her with chocolates and she asked advice on how to make this boundary clear to him and she was demoralized to the point that she hasn't been back on by people telling her she should thank him for chocolates and have willpower?!?!?! RAGE
Yes, there seem to be a lot of missy know-it-alls on these boards that have amazing will power. Almost makes you wonder how they got overweight to begin with right? Since they know everything about dieting and eating healthy they should just all get together and write a book called "You're doing it wrong!" Or "How hard is this to understand?" Or how about "You weak minded imbecile:Eat What You Want and Still Lose Weight."
What they don't get is they may think they are trying to help but they don't say things in a helpful tone of voice. They will state things so matter-of-factly, instead of phrasing their comments in terms of what works for them in regards to what they answering on. Like I've been saying, I label foods as bad or good, some others on here are clearly against that way of thinking towards a diet. I respect that and don't turn around and tell them "well, you are wrong." If you are going to question my way of thinking I'm going to just state my side and explain my way of thinking, but it's like there are people on here that can't accept that and will fight you to the death over your opinion until they scare you off the boards for life.
Or how about the people to which you say a very clear and concise statement to and they completely flip it around? Example:
Me:I like red hats
MFP commenter: Not everyone likes red hats!!!!
Me: I never said everyone did.
MFP Commenter: well, you implied it!
Me: um...what? Can I mail you some Twinkies?
Ok, I know I'm getting silly now, but I felt the need to get that off my chest. Let the crucifixion begin!
I wish these boards could be a more comfortable, light hearted, fun place to be, but much of the time they are not.
You sound quite angry. In the end, we all have to lose our weight, our way. For me, losing 80 lbs took willpower. It took saying no to the second cupcake, even though I thought I needed it.
For you, it may be different.
You do you!
I might sound a little angry because people should not be scared off of here or made to feel bad when they are on these boards for help with their weight loss journey. It's sickening to see how some people are attacked for their opinions and choices when it comes to dieting. Like you said "you do you." Share your opinion or experience in hopes of being some help to others, but don't go on the attack if they disagree. Sure, there are people that start threads as confrontational right off the bat, and those people are wrong to do so. But I've seen people that create a very innocent post and are crucified by the end of it. I always end up feeling bad for them because I'm sure they never thought it was going to turn so ugly so fast.
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My journey this time losing was to learn. I have to say regardless of the presentation of some people I have learned so much!
I too labeled food good/bad but now I understand food is fuel. Some foods fuel me longer some are tastier.
Not labeling the food has actually helped me have a positive relationship with food - my choices are now ummm - cake tasty but I will be hungry and tired soon after or tuna sandwich will hold me through to dinner. No longer cake=bad food which really doesn't work cuz cake is yummy, yummy = good wait it's bad. See the mixed message this creates?
I think folks on here really try to help others with misinformation or with ways to overcome their problems. Could some say it nicer? Heck yeah but it doesn't mean their info can't help someone.
When I hear "stop being a victim" I may not like it but it sure has made me think what role am I playing to help/hurt me in this journey.10 -
My journey this time losing was to learn. I have to say regardless of the presentation of some people I have learned so much!
I too labeled food good/bad but now I understand food is fuel. Some foods fuel me longer some are tastier.
Not labeling the food has actually helped me have a positive relationship with food - my choices are now ummm - cake tasty but I will be hungry and tired soon after or tuna sandwich will hold me through to dinner. No longer cake=bad food which really doesn't work cuz cake is yummy, yummy = good wait it's bad. See the mixed message this creates?
I think folks on here really try to help others with misinformation or with ways to overcome their problems. Could some say it nicer? Heck yeah but it doesn't mean their info can't help someone.
When I hear "stop being a victim" I may not like it but it sure has made me think what role am I playing to help/hurt me in this journey.
Agree! And that's all I'm really saying in the end. Offer help, but be nicer. Don't be insulting or make people feel stupid because they might not have your experiences, mindset, or views. You can state facts, if you know them to be that true, but don't be a prick about it by making statements like "what don't you understand?" Or "this isn't hard to get." And it seems like you understand food the way I do, but I can understand you not wanting to label it as good or bad. Like I said, I think for some people doing so could derail their journey, while for others it might work.
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My journey this time losing was to learn. I have to say regardless of the presentation of some people I have learned so much!
I too labeled food good/bad but now I understand food is fuel. Some foods fuel me longer some are tastier.
Not labeling the food has actually helped me have a positive relationship with food - my choices are now ummm - cake tasty but I will be hungry and tired soon after or tuna sandwich will hold me through to dinner. No longer cake=bad food which really doesn't work cuz cake is yummy, yummy = good wait it's bad. See the mixed message this creates?
I think folks on here really try to help others with misinformation or with ways to overcome their problems. Could some say it nicer? Heck yeah but it doesn't mean their info can't help someone.
When I hear "stop being a victim" I may not like it but it sure has made me think what role am I playing to help/hurt me in this journey.
Agree! And that's all I'm really saying in the end. Offer help, but be nicer. Don't be insulting or make people feel stupid because they might not have your experiences, mindset, or views. You can state facts, if you know them to be that true, but don't be a prick about it by making statements like "what don't you understand?" Or "this isn't hard to get." And it seems like you understand food the way I do, but I can understand you not wanting to label it as good or bad. Like I said, I think for some people doing so could derail their journey, while for others it might work.
I see what you're saying.
I'm asking you for your personal growth to look past those comments (hard sometimes I know) and see the message as a whole not just how they say things. My very first post on Mfp I was told I had fanciful thinking, I've been told I was silly several times ( I am) I almost asked for my money back (premium) and wanted to never come back.
Boy am I so glad I didn't stay away!!! I have learned so much. And maybe just maybe I can help buffer the super knowledgeable but harsh sometimes folks and those like me that wanted to run away.3 -
I rarely see that level of 'attacking' here on MFP. And when it does occur, all you need do is report the post in question and let the mods decide.Offer help, but be nicer. Don't be insulting or make people feel stupid because they might not have your experiences, mindset, or views. You can state facts, if you know them to be that true, but don't be a prick about it by making statements like "what don't you understand?" Or "this isn't hard to get."
And the issue becomes one of what, precisely, does "be nicer" actually mean? Because that is entirely open to each member's interpretation based on their knowledge, experience and personal style. Your definition of 'nicer' may - to me - come across as panderingly insincere and nauseatingly indirect and unhelpful, or vice-versa.
And for the majority of OPs that start a thread and then never return, I suspect they may have only done so in order to receive validation - to hear their opinions in a different voice - and that having their premise turn out to be misguided is something they are just not ready to either hear or deal with. So they abandon the thread, which is entirely their choice to do.
But for every person who starts such a thread, there are dozens of people that are merely lurking and learning, and may be ready to absorb the information that was generously offered to an unreceptive OP.
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My journey this time losing was to learn. I have to say regardless of the presentation of some people I have learned so much!
I too labeled food good/bad but now I understand food is fuel. Some foods fuel me longer some are tastier.
Not labeling the food has actually helped me have a positive relationship with food - my choices are now ummm - cake tasty but I will be hungry and tired soon after or tuna sandwich will hold me through to dinner. No longer cake=bad food which really doesn't work cuz cake is yummy, yummy = good wait it's bad. See the mixed message this creates?
I think folks on here really try to help others with misinformation or with ways to overcome their problems. Could some say it nicer? Heck yeah but it doesn't mean their info can't help someone.
When I hear "stop being a victim" I may not like it but it sure has made me think what role am I playing to help/hurt me in this journey.
Agree! And that's all I'm really saying in the end. Offer help, but be nicer. Don't be insulting or make people feel stupid because they might not have your experiences, mindset, or views. You can state facts, if you know them to be that true, but don't be a prick about it by making statements like "what don't you understand?" Or "this isn't hard to get." And it seems like you understand food the way I do, but I can understand you not wanting to label it as good or bad. Like I said, I think for some people doing so could derail their journey, while for others it might work.
I see what you're saying.
I'm asking you for your personal growth to look past those comments (hard sometimes I know) and see the message as a whole not just how they say things. My very first post on Mfp I was told I had fanciful thinking, I've been told I was silly several times ( I am) I almost asked for my money back (premium) and wanted to never come back.
Boy am I so glad I didn't stay away!!! I have learned so much. And maybe just maybe I can help buffer the super knowledgeable but harsh sometimes folks and those like me that wanted to run away.
Good advice! And a great way to look at it!
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snickerscharlie wrote: »
I rarely see that level of 'attacking' here on MFP. And when it does occur, all you need do is report the post in question and let the mods decide.Offer help, but be nicer. Don't be insulting or make people feel stupid because they might not have your experiences, mindset, or views. You can state facts, if you know them to be that true, but don't be a prick about it by making statements like "what don't you understand?" Or "this isn't hard to get."
And the issue becomes one of what, precisely, does "be nicer" actually mean? Because that is entirely open to each member's interpretation based on their knowledge, experience and personal style. Your definition of 'nicer' may - to me - come across as panderingly insincere and nauseatingly indirect and unhelpful, or vice-versa.
And for the majority of OPs that start a thread and then never return, I suspect they may have only done so in order to receive validation - to hear their opinions in a different voice - and that having their premise turn out to be misguided is something they are just not ready to either hear or deal with. So they abandon the thread, which is entirely their choice to do.
But for every person who starts such a thread, there are dozens of people that are merely lurking and learning, and may be ready to absorb the information that was generously offered to an unreceptive OP.
Yes absolutely this
I bristle at sycophants
I react well to straight-shooters
If this place had been nicey-nice I would not have succeeded in losing and maintaining loss but would have held on to my confusing beliefs, my fads and rules
Nope all hail those who told it like it is
Made the difference
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JustMissTracy wrote: »DisruptedMatrix wrote: »Did you see that thread where a woman's husband thought she was ungrateful because he sabatoged her with chocolates and she asked advice on how to make this boundary clear to him and she was demoralized to the point that she hasn't been back on by people telling her she should thank him for chocolates and have willpower?!?!?! RAGE
Yes, there seem to be a lot of missy know-it-alls on these boards that have amazing will power. Almost makes you wonder how they got overweight to begin with right? Since they know everything about dieting and eating healthy they should just all get together and write a book called "You're doing it wrong!" Or "How hard is this to understand?" Or how about "You weak minded imbecile:Eat What You Want and Still Lose Weight."
What they don't get is they may think they are trying to help but they don't say things in a helpful tone of voice. They will state things so matter-of-factly, instead of phrasing their comments in terms of what works for them in regards to what they answering on. Like I've been saying, I label foods as bad or good, some others on here are clearly against that way of thinking towards a diet. I respect that and don't turn around and tell them "well, you are wrong." If you are going to question my way of thinking I'm going to just state my side and explain my way of thinking, but it's like there are people on here that can't accept that and will fight you to the death over your opinion until they scare you off the boards for life.
Or how about the people to which you say a very clear and concise statement to and they completely flip it around? Example:
Me:I like red hats
MFP commenter: Not everyone likes red hats!!!!
Me: I never said everyone did.
MFP Commenter: well, you implied it!
Me: um...what? Can I mail you some Twinkies?
Ok, I know I'm getting silly now, but I felt the need to get that off my chest. Let the crucifixion begin!
I wish these boards could be a more comfortable, light hearted, fun place to be, but much of the time they are not.
You sound quite angry. In the end, we all have to lose our weight, our way. For me, losing 80 lbs took willpower. It took saying no to the second cupcake, even though I thought I needed it.
For you, it may be different.
You do you!
I might sound a little angry because people should not be scared off of here or made to feel bad when they are on these boards for help with their weight loss journey. It's sickening to see how some people are attacked for their opinions and choices when it comes to dieting. Like you said "you do you." Share your opinion or experience in hopes of being some help to others, but don't go on the attack if they disagree. Sure, there are people that start threads as confrontational right off the bat, and those people are wrong to do so. But I've seen people that create a very innocent post and are crucified by the end of it. I always end up feeling bad for them because I'm sure they never thought it was going to turn so ugly so fast.
Just to recap the burger vs. pizza thread.
You jumped in and said burgers are better, the kind of pizza that I am going to assume that everyone else is eating is going to lead to binges.
People responded and said that might be true for you, but not for everyone, many can feel satisfied on lower cal pizza than you apparently are assuming, or less, or will be just as or more likely to overeat when having a burger.
You dug in and kept arguing (I dunno why), that no, pizza was worse in general.
When eventually enough people had pointed out the flaw in this you got mad and pretended (although the thread disproved it) that people had been trying to say that pizza wasn't a worse choice for you, when that was never something even being discussed, and no one would have objected if that's what you'd said (about 50 previous people had said that one or the other was better for them).
Saying that a food is a bad choice for you is totally reasonable. But that has nothing to do with the common statement on MFP that there are no inherently bad foods -- it depends on the person and the overall diet. Nor is "eat what you like within your calories" bad advice, although I typically recommend considering satiety and nutrition too, as do most here. I assume that for any sensible adult eating what you like within your calories will include consideration of nutrition and satiety, since I know I personally like to eat foods that make me feel good, are good for me (as part of my overall diet), and fill me up. But of course I can eat some ice cream as part of a sensible overall healthy diet and still be sated. (If it were a trigger food for me I might avoid it for a while and work on that.)
People who say there are no bad foods don't mean -- and I am sure that in reality you know this -- that what people eat overall makes no difference or that it's not important to consider how you feel or health. They mean that including some cheese (or pizza or chocolates) if you like it won't make your overall diet less healthy. If you can't eat chocolates without binging, don't eat it (at least for now) and work on that. But also don't pretend like it's possible to totally avoid every being tempted by them or blame the chocolate shop, the fact someone in a moving is eating chocolates, your husband for buying you chocolates (when you never said not to), someone for saying "hey, want a chocolate," your workplace for having chocolates around, etc., for the fact that you aren't losing weight. Learning how to deal with temptation is necessary.7 -
Puppybear1 wrote: »Sugar is a drug. And just like alcoholics, some people have genetic predispositions for addiction, ie - diabetics. I have been preaching this topic for a week and fending off the shade I get for comparing sugar to drugs, but it IS a drug, or food companies wouldn't put it in practically everything! Kudos to the Enlightened!
This might possibly be the most short-sighted and ignorant comment I've seen in a looooong time. I have had Type 1 diabetes since I was 6 (over 24 years). So...that makes me genetically predisposed for addiction????? WTF? Please shared with us what research has ever correlated having diabetes with a genetic predisposition to addiction.... LMAO. I am not even offended, I'm just amused by the level of ridiculousness.7 -
snickerscharlie wrote: »
I rarely see that level of 'attacking' here on MFP. And when it does occur, all you need do is report the post in question and let the mods decide.Offer help, but be nicer. Don't be insulting or make people feel stupid because they might not have your experiences, mindset, or views. You can state facts, if you know them to be that true, but don't be a prick about it by making statements like "what don't you understand?" Or "this isn't hard to get."
And the issue becomes one of what, precisely, does "be nicer" actually mean? Because that is entirely open to each member's interpretation based on their knowledge, experience and personal style. Your definition of 'nicer' may - to me - come across as panderingly insincere and nauseatingly indirect and unhelpful, or vice-versa.
And for the majority of OPs that start a thread and then never return, I suspect they may have only done so in order to receive validation - to hear their opinions in a different voice - and that having their premise turn out to be misguided is something they are just not ready to either hear or deal with. So they abandon the thread, which is entirely their choice to do.
But for every person who starts such a thread, there are dozens of people that are merely lurking and learning, and may be ready to absorb the information that was generously offered to an unreceptive OP.
Yes absolutely this
I bristle at sycophants
I react well to straight-shooters
If this place had been nicey-nice I would not have succeeded in losing and maintaining loss but would have held on to my confusing beliefs, my fads and rules
Nope all hail those who told it like it is
Made the difference
There is a difference between being sickeningly sweet and stating a opinion in an insulting way. No one wants to be made to feel stupid or insulted by someone who THINK they know best and state it as such. You can be a straight shooter without being mean or belittling
4 -
I'm in between. I like the honest truth but I like it served with salt, some like it with sugar and others with hot sauce.4
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