How disgusting is this...

britzzie

This girl made peace with her body. She decided that she loves it, and it is what it is no matter what anyone else thinks.

We celebrate talk like this all the time. Accepting a bit of stubborn flab, extra skin, stretch marks, weirdly shaped belly buttons, etc.

So there must be some kind of limitation on it. Like, if you are 'too fat', it's 'disgusting' for you to love your body. Or if you aren't 'doing something about it", you better not love your body. Or if you do...you better not tell anyone...

Now I'm wondering if I'm disgusting for loving mine while I took a break from cutting at 209lbs? Am I under the limit?

Valarama

gosh you're worse than tumblr.
why do you care, exactly?
she's decided to be comfortable with who she is (for now, anyways) and you decided to lose weight. so?
so what?
none of it really matters, you know.

ohnstadk

I don't find it disgusting, though I do feel a massive amount of pity for the author

Edit: though I will say she is an exceptional writer

tlsegar

As for the OP, I have to say and I mean this in the most respectful way possible, but I would not respond positively to you were you my healthcare provider. I have had physicians and nurses in the past who I knew were disgusted by me. They didn't have to outright say it but it was evident in the manner in which they provided care. All it did was make me more resentful and determined to rebel. Some people may respond positively to that sort of treatment but I do not. I don't want anyone making excuses for me or to even letme make excuses for myself . But I can appreciate and receive constructive feedback delivered without judgement. That is why I get along much better with my nurse than my nutritionist. And just because I've lost almost 100 lbs I don't feel that gives me license to to look down on other people who are at a different point in their journey or have yet to start. Just something to consider as you will most likely have patients who cover a wide spectrum in the level of care they need and respond to.

R
yes... cause posting on a forum = how one gives quality of pt care.

Yes because you referred to her as disgusting. If you think that's never going to translate into how you approach your patients then you are mistaken. Your judgements will show and your patients will see it. Trust me, I've been there. I'm not trying to convince you to change or even shame you for it. We feel how we feel. But not everyone will respond to the care that you provide. That's my point.

gigglybeth

This was me last year. I had been fat my whole life. I'd let my weight make me feel like less of a person. I realized it's not worth it.

I don't care about being skinny! I don't want to have surgery, and I don't want to starve myself. I don't need the cute clothes, or the attention. I decided that if I weighed 318 lbs for the rest of my life I would be happy. There's so much more to life than weight.

When I finally accepted my weight and let go of the guilt associated with I was able to really see myself and really figure out what I do care about. I care about playing tag with my kids, and getting up in the morning without pain. I want energy and I want to be me without the help of caffeine, or cheese to bury the pain inside. Now that I've started running I want to be faster and feel the sun on my face as I get over that next hill. I want my boys to see me accomplish something next week when I do my 5k.

It's not up to anyone else to tell this girl she needs to lose weight. Once she is happy with herself she will be able to do anything she wants to. Some people just need to take a different route to get there.

:flowerforyou: Congrats on your loss!

Hannah_Banana

Wild Wall of Text Appears!
Wall of Text uses Judgement!
It's super effective!
Critical Hit!

...

You black out!

In all seriousness, I think she's misguided, naive, ignorant even... but disgusting? No. Disgusting would be forcing her unhealthy ideals on other people.

Mmm, yes pretty much this. The author chooses to be fat. The OP chooses to judge her. Neither of those things are wrong. The only thing that would be wrong is if the OP forced her to lose weight or she forced him to get fat again.

You can have all the opinions you want, as long as you don't force them on others.

totalsham

epigenetics....

if you cant watch more then 5 seconds.... 4:30 on

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kp1bZEUgqVI

TheSlorax

I don't know if this is disgusting at all. My heart breaks for this girl (or woman, now) because she clearly has a lot of emotional issues and yes, maybe even some mental health challenges. It's clear to me that her weight is a defense mechanism, and she even alludes to it as being a sort of armor for her. That is not disgusting, but sad.

My question is, why is anorexia and bulimia treated with much more care than a disorder such as the author of the article? It's clear to many posters that in this situation, there is more than meets the eye. Yet, there is little sensitivity shown towards her and her plight. Most are under the impression that this is something she "chooses" to do. For me, my eating was a compulsion. No matter what anyone told me, I could not control it. "Everything in moderation," my doctors used to say. I used to feel my blood boiling at that comment, because even at 12 years old I knew that they would not say that to an alcoholic or a drug addict, and truly, wasn't my addiction destructive too? I felt frustrated because the only "resources" they gave me were to treat my weight, not my brain or my emotions. I feel that frustration in the author.

Eating disorders do not always lead to low body fat percentages and gaunt appearances. Sometimes they cause weight gain instead. But why is that worse and somehow despicable vs. someone who starves themselves? Being overweight can cause health problems, but so can being far too thin as you see in anorexics. I just don't understand this double standard. And yes, that, to me, is disgusting. Somehow society has accepted anorexia and bulimia as disorders that need to be treated with care. Yet being fat because of binging disorders and emotional eating just brings shame and judgement. It's not disgusting, it's sad.

ThinLizzie0802

I completely agree with her being sick of people only seeing her as a fat person and that her only accomplishment could be losing weight. I think that is a huge part of this article- that while she has come to terms with her life and achievements-other people, even her advisor, can't focus on her intelligence and other areas. She isn't crying about not having a bf, or not fitting into clothes, she's saying that she is coming to terms with her past and her body they way she wants to and is tired of other people forcing their ideas on her and not recognizing the other great things she has done. Not disgusting at all. Clearly she goes to the doctor. Clearly she goes to the therapist. She thinks about and understands her weight and her health, but she is choosing to stop focusing on the being fat aspect right now. Will she pay for this later? Yes? Should we care what she does? No. It is a great piece to see that not everyone is on a battle to become fit. There are 7 billion people in the world, and those who aren't focused on their health aren't the worst kind.

dmpizza

So well written I am suspicious if it is real.
(I am NOT saying fat people can't write)

TLCorsini

Being healthy and getting fit is a lifesytle not everyone wants. Some people PREFER to be that way. It's not our job to judge others. If she's happy the way she is, let her be. My husband is overweight. Could he stand to lose some weight? Yes. Is he healthy the way he is now? Probably not. But he is happy with how he is, and I love him regardless. We should accept people for how they are, not what we think they should be.

Mischievous_Rascal

I was exactly there in almost the same situation and I felt and reacted exactly that way. Emphasis on "reacted" instead of "acted" - one's emotional and one's intellectual. She's really young (and still obviously really emotional about her life). But weren't we all convinced that our reasons, rationalizations and ideas were the only possible good ones when we were in our teens/early 20's, whether we had the best or worst upbringing? I just hope she will grow and change for the healthier, like I and a lot of people on here have, but disgusting is not the right word to use for someone who has these issues and makes these choices. Sad, yes, and definately in need of help, but that will only come once she's ready to change. Kinda like you had to be ready to change to lose your weight, right OP?

qtgonewild

far from disgusting. let her be. its her life. live and let live.

KatLifter

This girl made peace with her body. She decided that she loves it, and it is what it is no matter what anyone else thinks.

We celebrate talk like this all the time. Accepting a bit of stubborn flab, extra skin, stretch marks, weirdly shaped belly buttons, etc.

So there must be some kind of limitation on it. Like, if you are 'too fat', it's 'disgusting' for you to love your body. Or if you aren't 'doing something about it", you better not love your body. Or if you do...you better not tell anyone...

Now I'm wondering if I'm disgusting for loving mine while I took a break from cutting at 209lbs? Am I under the limit?

It's the mental illness piece, not the number on the scale piece that is being reacted to.
She has a binge eating disorder, and seems to be using societal norms to justify it by refusing to conform.

BTW:You look great and healthy, and this thread has absolutely nothing to do with you or your health/fitness goals.

gigi_RN2013

i don't think she's disgusting but i do worry about her health ... i mean, if your obese, your health can truly suffer ...

k_winder

The book is selling disinformation to dieters that don't want to take responsibility for their bad decisions. They don't have an innate genetic disposition to be hungrier than others. Their continued overeating has changed their urge to eat (google epigenetics if you want to learn more). So technically they do have more urges to eat, but that's only because they have consistently overate throughout their life. Habits, good and bad are formed and can be undone. She just doesnt want to.

I just looked through the author's other articles and saw one called "My best relationship is with my dog". I'm not surprised.

Are you serious? The only reason someone overeats is because they overate in the past?

You seriously need to get your head out of your butt and take a look around. There are a lot of reasons people overeat, and for some it has no connection to creating a habit of overeating. There are serious hormonal imbalances that turn off the signaling that tells someone they are full and others which can make a person feel very hungry all the time. Could this author have one of these imbalances? It's possible. I'm not saying it's likely....but it's possible. I really don't think ANY of us here are in a position where we should be judging her or her decisions as 'disgusting' when we don't have much of any information to go off of.

someone didnt google epigenetics

I know what epigenetics is. I was not in any way referring to anything having to do with genetics or a change in genetics. I was referring to a hormonal imbalance that can cause one to feel hungry all the time because the hormone that signals 'I'm full' is not present or is deficient to a degree. Yes, maybe, down the line, her choices will or won't cause genetic changes in herself which will further exacerbate the issue, or even be passed to any future children. But for the immediate here and now I'm referring only to an immediate hormonal imbalance.

LaurenAOK

I don't think this is disgusting at all. It's her choice and she's confident in it. She's not stupid, she knows the health risks. She has the right to be fat just like someone who wants to smoke has the right to smoke.

I thought the essay was very well-written and empowering. Good for her.

thekyleo

damn, i'm gone for a half and hour and i miss all the fireworks

britzzie

This girl made peace with her body. She decided that she loves it, and it is what it is no matter what anyone else thinks.

We celebrate talk like this all the time. Accepting a bit of stubborn flab, extra skin, stretch marks, weirdly shaped belly buttons, etc.

So there must be some kind of limitation on it. Like, if you are 'too fat', it's 'disgusting' for you to love your body. Or if you aren't 'doing something about it", you better not love your body. Or if you do...you better not tell anyone...

Now I'm wondering if I'm disgusting for loving mine while I took a break from cutting at 209lbs? Am I under the limit?

It's the mental illness piece, not the number on the scale piece that is being reacted to.
She has a binge eating disorder, and seems to be using societal norms to justify it by refusing to conform.

BTW:You look great and healthy, and this thread has absolutely nothing to do with you or your health/fitness goals.

Thanks! That's very sweet! I wasn't ACTUALLY wondering.... I was more making a point. Like, of course you wouldn't judge me, why would you judge her? Because there's some ambiguous cutoff? It's ridiculous.

But yes, I agree with you on the BED, which is causing her to be overweight. Certainly, she resists treatment. But it's sad. It's not disgusting. Lots of people with addictions resist treatment. Hell, most of them do at first and continually. But is it 'disgusting' and shameful, like OP continues to claim. No. It's not. I think it's offensive too because if you think off all of the different types of addicts that resist treatment, 'disgusting' doesn't seem to come to mind. But it's ok to call a fat girl with BED 'disgusting.' I don't get it. And it offends me.

elleloch

I don't know if this is disgusting at all. My heart breaks for this girl (or woman, now) because she clearly has a lot of emotional issues and yes, maybe even some mental health challenges. It's clear to me that her weight is a defense mechanism, and she even alludes to it as being a sort of armor for her. That is not disgusting, but sad.

My question is, why is anorexia and bulimia treated with much more care than a disorder such as the author of the article? It's clear to many posters that in this situation, there is more than meets the eye. Yet, there is little sensitivity shown towards her and her plight. Most are under the impression that this is something she "chooses" to do. For me, my eating was a compulsion. No matter what anyone told me, I could not control it. "Everything in moderation," my doctors used to say. I used to feel my blood boiling at that comment, because even at 12 years old I knew that they would not say that to an alcoholic or a drug addict, and truly, wasn't my addiction destructive too? I felt frustrated because the only "resources" they gave me were to treat my weight, not my brain or my emotions. I feel that frustration in the author.

Eating disorders do not always lead to low body fat percentages and gaunt appearances. Sometimes they cause weight gain instead. But why is that worse and somehow despicable vs. someone who starves themselves? Being overweight can cause health problems, but so can being far too thin as you see in anorexics. I just don't understand this double standard. And yes, that, to me, is disgusting. Somehow society has accepted anorexia and bulimia as disorders that need to be treated with care. Yet being fat because of binging disorders and emotional eating just brings shame and judgement. It's not disgusting, it's sad.

Preach