Less Alcohol - March 2018- One day at a Time
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JulieAL1969 wrote: »This weekend will be a big test for me. I am going away with my friends to party and go out to bars and dance. They are big drinkers but always under control. We have great laughs and love the holiday. And we Uber or walk everywhere. I will probably have a few drinks. Maybe not. I really won't know until I'm with them how I'll feel.
On one hand, I don't even want to take one sip; it has lost its appeal after 70+ days of AF.
On the other hand, I may need this weekend to sign and seal the deal that my drinking days are over. I may indulge one last time and probably regret it.
What's strange is the anxiety I am feeling now just thinking about it. The reason I was able to be AF since Jan.1st was that I made an absolute rule within myself not to take a sip.
JulieAL1969,
You are an incredible person. You always give such great advice and support. The decision to drink or not will not change that and you will still be an incredible person.
I will be flying to NY on Sunday to celebrate my birthday. My plan is to not drink however I know that it is possible. I am not going to stress. It is not a win or lose. It another day to move forward and not to look back. Enjoy your time with or without drinking. Remember that you are an incredible person.5 -
I’m Irish living in Ireland and it’s st Patrick’s day on Saturday so I’m out but good luck to the rest of you.and please take a moment on Saturday in memory of my liver .5
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With small kids our St Patrick’s day will be mellow, my husband will definitely buy some Stout beer, luckily I’ll be w my SIL who is pregnant and not drinking so that will help!!6
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We will have a mellow SPD. My husband will just be getting back from Europe and will be upside down with jet lag so we will not be going out anywhere which is fine with me. Plus it is supposed to be cold and yucky here so that makes me just want to stay in.5
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Saturday St.Pattys Day, the only thing I REALLY want to do is find some place serving Irish lamb stew or bangers and mash. I won't be participating in any drinking of alcohol that day because I know how quickly it can go South. Oh and I want to listen to Irish music. (Sorry erik...lol)
A little fyi to to anyone looking for a great site for extra help keeping track of your drinking. Try drinkaware.com. I just signed up and I am finding it a huge wealth of knowledge for cutting back or stopping.5 -
My NSV today was when I wore a fitted polo to work and my boss said, hey you been working out, you look fit.....truth is i have been working out but the biggest impact was going AF. it feels great when others see the progress15
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Poston1966 wrote: »JulieAL1969 wrote: »This weekend will be a big test for me. I am going away with my friends to party and go out to bars and dance. They are big drinkers but always under control. We have great laughs and love the holiday. And we Uber or walk everywhere. I will probably have a few drinks. Maybe not. I really won't know until I'm with them how I'll feel.
On one hand, I don't even want to take one sip; it has lost its appeal after 70+ days of AF.
On the other hand, I may need this weekend to sign and seal the deal that my drinking days are over. I may indulge one last time and probably regret it.
What's strange is the anxiety I am feeling now just thinking about it. The reason I was able to be AF since Jan.1st was that I made an absolute rule within myself not to take a sip.
JulieAL1969,
You are an incredible person. You always give such great advice and support. The decision to drink or not will not change that and you will still be an incredible person.
I will be flying to NY on Sunday to celebrate my birthday. My plan is to not drink however I know that it is possible. I am not going to stress. It is not a win or lose. It another day to move forward and not to look back. Enjoy your time with or without drinking. Remember that you are an incredible person.
Happy Birthday !! Wishing you joy, laughter, much love and happiness! Thanks for your kind words:)
Thanks so much for relieving my stress!
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Saturday St.Pattys Day, the only thing I REALLY want to do is find some place serving Irish lamb stew or bangers and mash. I won't be participating in any drinking of alcohol that day because I know how quickly it can go South. Oh and I want to listen to Irish music. (Sorry erik...lol)
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Oh I love the Irish music and food!
It’s the huge crowds and people wearing “I’m Irish Today” shirts who are puking in the middle of the dance floor at the bar that I hate!2 -
lporter229 wrote: »JulieAL1969 wrote: »This weekend will be a big test for me. I am going away with my friends to party and go out to bars and dance. They are big drinkers but always under control. We have great laughs and love the holiday. And we Uber or walk everywhere. I will probably have a few drinks. Maybe not. I really won't know until I'm with them how I'll feel.
On one hand, I don't even want to take one sip; it has lost its appeal after 70+ days of AF.
On the other hand, I may need this weekend to sign and seal the deal that my drinking days are over. I may indulge one last time and probably regret it.
What's strange is the anxiety I am feeling now just thinking about it. The reason I was able to be AF since Jan.1st was that I made an absolute rule within myself not to take a sip.
Just my 2 cents: That is HUGE and is the one thing I have not been able to do with myself that keeps leading me back to drinking. You have done an AMAZING job so far. I completely understand your concern and anxiety about this upcoming weekend. I think that you have to ask yourself what it is that you stand to gain by drinking this weekend. Is it really to prove to yourself that your drinking days are over or is it to prove to yourself that you can have the very occasional indulgence and then go back to being alcohol free? Either answer is fine, whatever it is that you are looking for. Just know that, from somebody that has been unable to make that commitment to myself, what you have accomplished is something to be very proud of and it might not be as easy if you have to start over.
Please know that I am by no means preaching here. I completely respect and support whatever you decide to do. I just wanted to offer a perspective from someone who continues to struggle with what you have accomplished and also let you know how much I admire you for it.
Thank you! I know you're not preaching. You have been so sensible and candid on this thread, and we love you for it. I think what I stand to gain is a headache! But also perhaps a little time to let my hair down.
By no means will I go back to regular drinking or even drinking occasionally. I think I'll be the person who may drink once in a blue moon.
But I do agree that it is not easy to start all over. You are so right.
You've made a ton of progress. You've learned your limitations and strengths. And you've exercised that willpower muscle ! So proud of your accomplishments.3 -
We support you wherever life leads you this weekendJulieAL1969 wrote: »This weekend will be a big test for me. I am going away with my friends to party and go out to bars and dance. They are big drinkers but always under control. We have great laughs and love the holiday. And we Uber or walk everywhere. I will probably have a few drinks. Maybe not. I really won't know until I'm with them how I'll feel.
On one hand, I don't even want to take one sip; it has lost its appeal after 70+ days of AF.
On the other hand, I may need this weekend to sign and seal the deal that my drinking days are over. I may indulge one last time and probably regret it.
What's strange is the anxiety I am feeling now just thinking about it. The reason I was able to be AF since Jan.1st was that I made an absolute rule within myself not to take a sip.
there is no right or wrong; we can only do the best we can do for ourselves individually. It's definitely a learning process that's for sure 
We learn as we go sometimes it's amazing sometimes it's hard.
You're right! There is no right or wrong, just learning as we go. Thanks:) xo2 -
@JulieAL1969 what ever your decision is this weekend you will come out of this better and with a great knowledge of yourself. Don’t stress it too much.
And since it is two days away now, how does everyone plan on handling Amateur Hour ... I mean St. Patrick’s Day?
As i’ve stated before, I personally hate this holiday. I plan on going to the gym in the morning and staying home with my wife the rest of the day.
Thanks Erik! You always have wise words.2 -
darcy08008 wrote: »I'm so glad I found this group!!
Welcome! We're happy you found us and we found you!:) xo1 -
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@erikNJ that just made me LOL. "I'm Irish today" while puking on the dance floor. Haha. Yes, seeing the regergitated green beer is hardly what one would consider festive or a good time out. I for once will not be waking up and saying to my friends the next day, "it seemed like a good idea at the time", which was basically my mantra every March 18.5
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My NSV today was when I wore a fitted polo to work and my boss said, hey you been working out, you look fit.....truth is i have been working out but the biggest impact was going AF. it feels great when others see the progress
Norm, congratulations that is awesome! Good for you. I had a similar thing happen. My grown daughter saw me after I had been sober a few weeks and said, "You look different. Are you well?" I said, "thanks." LOL! It was hardly a compliment but I think she was referring to me losing a few pounds.7 -
JulieAL1969- I completely understand the anxiety you are feeling. I am on holiday this week, and although I planned to have two drinks while I was away, after 73 days AF I just really did not know if I wanted to drink or not, and end that streak. I ended up having one of the planned drinks, today- a beer. I think it was helpful for me because I really realized how much I don't miss it at all. I think I needed to have that drink though to really know, because all week, I struggled with this feeling of missing out, even though I have had sooo many benefits from going AF. Whatever you decide to do, as others have said, it's not win or lose! It's all learning and experience that can inform us as we continue making decisions along this journey.6
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Made it past the 50 day check in for accountability. Small steps towards personal goals.7
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Hey all. Sorry I haven't checked in yet this week. I have done really well though, exercised 5 out of 7 days and 2 days with a couple of drinks. But what I'm most excited about is that I'm down 5 pounds since starting this journey. Like Norm said, I've had a coworker mention to me too about my pants looking big. I am celebrating St. Patty's day by running in a 5k race tomorrow morning. Yes you get free tickets to the party afterwards with green beer, but I'll just head home for some yummy breakfast instead.
Now on to my biggest concern. Feeling so good, loosing some weight is awesome. But I need to keep myself focused and not fall into the trap of giving myself excuses now to not be disciplined. So that's my goals for the next couple of weeks, STAY THE COURSE.7 -
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JulieAL1969 wrote: »This weekend will be a big test for me. I am going away with my friends to party and go out to bars and dance. They are big drinkers but always under control. We have great laughs and love the holiday. And we Uber or walk everywhere. I will probably have a few drinks. Maybe not. I really won't know until I'm with them how I'll feel.
On one hand, I don't even want to take one sip; it has lost its appeal after 70+ days of AF.
On the other hand, I may need this weekend to sign and seal the deal that my drinking days are over. I may indulge one last time and probably regret it.
What's strange is the anxiety I am feeling now just thinking about it. The reason I was able to be AF since Jan.1st was that I made an absolute rule within myself not to take a sip.
It's one day at a time. That's all it is. It's just a day in the life.3 -
Went to Happy Hour last night for food and wine. Had 2 glasses of my 3 drinks a week. Ok with that. 4 glasses of water to 2 of wine. Then came home and wanted something sweet. Should have gone for the chocolate but had a Kahlua and milk instead. That was too much. I could feel the difference and not so great. Feel ok today and now know that 3 in one night isn't what I want. No more for the week.10
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runtodayamyrun wrote: »STAY THE COURSE.
Oh my gosh that is very true. Some people achieve a goal then completely go off course and end up back at square one. Good for you thinking so far ahead.
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Hiya! Would some help me please? I drink most every night after work and i know it's not good. Please help.8
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@JulieAL1969 - challenging weekend ahead for you for sure. Wishing you the very best and we'll all welcome you back when it's over with and will be eager to hear how it went! Hugs!2
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suerlewis2 wrote: »Hiya! Would some help me please? I drink most every night after work and i know it's not good. Please help.
What do you need? If you need friends to help, this thread will be very helpful. Also, first thing, figure out why you drink every day. If you cant change the cause, maybe you can change the effect. Make a plan for tomorrow, what will you do when you get home from work instead of drinking. Stay out of the house- maybe change your routine, exercise more, write down your goals. Just take one step at a time.
For tomorrow, make a plan and set a goal for one day at a time. xo
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Thank you. The more advice, the better.4
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JulieAL1969- I completely understand the anxiety you are feeling. I am on holiday this week, and although I planned to have two drinks while I was away, after 73 days AF I just really did not know if I wanted to drink or not, and end that streak. I ended up having one of the planned drinks, today- a beer. I think it was helpful for me because I really realized how much I don't miss it at all. I think I needed to have that drink though to really know, because all week, I struggled with this feeling of missing out, even though I have had sooo many benefits from going AF. Whatever you decide to do, as others have said, it's not win or lose! It's all learning and experience that can inform us as we continue making decisions along this journey.
We are in the same boat! I probably will drink a beer tomorrow. One reason is that I dont really love beer like I like vodka or wine. So, I wont go overboard. It is a struggle because I fear that I will feel awful , headache, nausea, and have the change that I'll wipe out my great record. Mind games.
I love your words that it's all learning and we can use these life experiences to grow. xo2 -
What do I need? Helluva question. Thank you.2
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