Less Alcohol - March 2018- One day at a Time

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  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,381 Member
    Poston1966 wrote: »
    This weekend will be a big test for me. I am going away with my friends to party and go out to bars and dance. They are big drinkers but always under control. We have great laughs and love the holiday. And we Uber or walk everywhere. I will probably have a few drinks. Maybe not. I really won't know until I'm with them how I'll feel.

    On one hand, I don't even want to take one sip; it has lost its appeal after 70+ days of AF.
    On the other hand, I may need this weekend to sign and seal the deal that my drinking days are over. I may indulge one last time and probably regret it.

    What's strange is the anxiety I am feeling now just thinking about it. The reason I was able to be AF since Jan.1st was that I made an absolute rule within myself not to take a sip.

    JulieAL1969,

    You are an incredible person. You always give such great advice and support. The decision to drink or not will not change that and you will still be an incredible person.
    I will be flying to NY on Sunday to celebrate my birthday. My plan is to not drink however I know that it is possible. I am not going to stress. It is not a win or lose. It another day to move forward and not to look back. Enjoy your time with or without drinking. Remember that you are an incredible person.

    Happy Birthday !! Wishing you joy, laughter, much love and happiness! Thanks for your kind words:)
    Thanks so much for relieving my stress!
  • erikNJ
    erikNJ Posts: 1,009 Member
    MissMay wrote: »
    Saturday St.Pattys Day, the only thing I REALLY want to do is find some place serving Irish lamb stew or bangers and mash. I won't be participating in any drinking of alcohol that day because I know how quickly it can go South. Oh and I want to listen to Irish music. (Sorry erik...lol)
    .

    Oh I love the Irish music and food!
    It’s the huge crowds and people wearing “I’m Irish Today” shirts who are puking in the middle of the dance floor at the bar that I hate!
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,381 Member
    lporter229 wrote: »
    This weekend will be a big test for me. I am going away with my friends to party and go out to bars and dance. They are big drinkers but always under control. We have great laughs and love the holiday. And we Uber or walk everywhere. I will probably have a few drinks. Maybe not. I really won't know until I'm with them how I'll feel.

    On one hand, I don't even want to take one sip; it has lost its appeal after 70+ days of AF.
    On the other hand, I may need this weekend to sign and seal the deal that my drinking days are over. I may indulge one last time and probably regret it.

    What's strange is the anxiety I am feeling now just thinking about it. The reason I was able to be AF since Jan.1st was that I made an absolute rule within myself not to take a sip.

    Just my 2 cents: That is HUGE and is the one thing I have not been able to do with myself that keeps leading me back to drinking. You have done an AMAZING job so far. I completely understand your concern and anxiety about this upcoming weekend. I think that you have to ask yourself what it is that you stand to gain by drinking this weekend. Is it really to prove to yourself that your drinking days are over or is it to prove to yourself that you can have the very occasional indulgence and then go back to being alcohol free? Either answer is fine, whatever it is that you are looking for. Just know that, from somebody that has been unable to make that commitment to myself, what you have accomplished is something to be very proud of and it might not be as easy if you have to start over.

    Please know that I am by no means preaching here. I completely respect and support whatever you decide to do. I just wanted to offer a perspective from someone who continues to struggle with what you have accomplished and also let you know how much I admire you for it.

    Thank you! I know you're not preaching. You have been so sensible and candid on this thread, and we love you for it. I think what I stand to gain is a headache! But also perhaps a little time to let my hair down.
    By no means will I go back to regular drinking or even drinking occasionally. I think I'll be the person who may drink once in a blue moon.
    But I do agree that it is not easy to start all over. You are so right.

    You've made a ton of progress. You've learned your limitations and strengths. And you've exercised that willpower muscle ! So proud of your accomplishments.
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,381 Member
    ali3boys wrote: »
    This weekend will be a big test for me. I am going away with my friends to party and go out to bars and dance. They are big drinkers but always under control. We have great laughs and love the holiday. And we Uber or walk everywhere. I will probably have a few drinks. Maybe not. I really won't know until I'm with them how I'll feel.

    On one hand, I don't even want to take one sip; it has lost its appeal after 70+ days of AF.
    On the other hand, I may need this weekend to sign and seal the deal that my drinking days are over. I may indulge one last time and probably regret it.

    What's strange is the anxiety I am feeling now just thinking about it. The reason I was able to be AF since Jan.1st was that I made an absolute rule within myself not to take a sip.
    We support you wherever life leads you this weekend :) there is no right or wrong; we can only do the best we can do for ourselves individually. It's definitely a learning process that's for sure ;) We learn as we go :) sometimes it's amazing sometimes it's hard.

    You're right! There is no right or wrong, just learning as we go. Thanks:) xo
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,381 Member
    erikNJ wrote: »
    @JulieAL1969 what ever your decision is this weekend you will come out of this better and with a great knowledge of yourself. Don’t stress it too much.

    And since it is two days away now, how does everyone plan on handling Amateur Hour ... I mean St. Patrick’s Day?
    As i’ve stated before, I personally hate this holiday. I plan on going to the gym in the morning and staying home with my wife the rest of the day.

    Thanks Erik! You always have wise words.
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,381 Member
    darcy08008 wrote: »
    I'm so glad I found this group!!

    Welcome! We're happy you found us and we found you!:) xo
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,381 Member
    Smilin40 wrote: »
    I’m Irish living in Ireland and it’s st Patrick’s day on Saturday so I’m out but good luck to the rest of you.and please take a moment on Saturday in memory of my liver .

    Enjoy the holiday! Drink lots of water to comfort that liver:) xo
  • runtodayamyrun
    runtodayamyrun Posts: 59 Member
    MissMay wrote: »
    Made it past the 50 day check in for accountability. Small steps towards personal goals.

    YAY!
  • ehseeker
    ehseeker Posts: 515 Member
    This weekend will be a big test for me. I am going away with my friends to party and go out to bars and dance. They are big drinkers but always under control. We have great laughs and love the holiday. And we Uber or walk everywhere. I will probably have a few drinks. Maybe not. I really won't know until I'm with them how I'll feel.

    On one hand, I don't even want to take one sip; it has lost its appeal after 70+ days of AF.
    On the other hand, I may need this weekend to sign and seal the deal that my drinking days are over. I may indulge one last time and probably regret it.

    What's strange is the anxiety I am feeling now just thinking about it. The reason I was able to be AF since Jan.1st was that I made an absolute rule within myself not to take a sip.

    It's one day at a time. That's all it is. It's just a day in the life.
  • MissMay
    MissMay Posts: 3,755 Member
    STAY THE COURSE.

    Oh my gosh that is very true. Some people achieve a goal then completely go off course and end up back at square one. Good for you thinking so far ahead.

  • kittybenn
    kittybenn Posts: 444 Member
    @JulieAL1969 - challenging weekend ahead for you for sure. Wishing you the very best and we'll all welcome you back when it's over with and will be eager to hear how it went! Hugs!
  • kittybenn
    kittybenn Posts: 444 Member
    @MissMay - thanks so much for the tip on that app!
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,381 Member
    MissMay wrote: »
    Made it past the 50 day check in for accountability. Small steps towards personal goals.

    50 beautiful days! Congrats! I bet you feel terrific! Stay the course. xoxo
  • suerlewis2
    suerlewis2 Posts: 126 Member
    Thank you. The more advice, the better.
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,381 Member
    wigi41 wrote: »
    JulieAL1969- I completely understand the anxiety you are feeling. I am on holiday this week, and although I planned to have two drinks while I was away, after 73 days AF I just really did not know if I wanted to drink or not, and end that streak. I ended up having one of the planned drinks, today- a beer. I think it was helpful for me because I really realized how much I don't miss it at all. I think I needed to have that drink though to really know, because all week, I struggled with this feeling of missing out, even though I have had sooo many benefits from going AF. Whatever you decide to do, as others have said, it's not win or lose! It's all learning and experience that can inform us as we continue making decisions along this journey.

    We are in the same boat! I probably will drink a beer tomorrow. One reason is that I dont really love beer like I like vodka or wine. So, I wont go overboard. It is a struggle because I fear that I will feel awful , headache, nausea, and have the change that I'll wipe out my great record. Mind games.
    I love your words that it's all learning and we can use these life experiences to grow. xo
  • suerlewis2
    suerlewis2 Posts: 126 Member
    What do I need? Helluva question. Thank you.
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