WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR MARCH 2018
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Good morning. I’m just checking in. I’m skipping the gym today. I’ve been feeling a twinge in my back ever since I started back to the gym after getting my stitches out, but yesterday it was so bad, I couldn’t finish my workout. I came home, took Aleve and applied a heating pad for 20 minutes and I got to feeling pretty good. It still has the twinge today, so I’m not pushing it.
My heart is breaking for a family in my town whose 7 year old son died yesterday. I often sub for his uncle. The boy is fairly famous. Some of you may even follow his story. Five years ago, he suffered a traumatic brain injury when a tree fell on him at daycare. Yesterday he started having labored breathing. His mom immediately took him to the local ER and he went to his regular hospital from there where he passed away. RIP, Tripp.
I’ve haven’t reported in on my evening with Adam Hamilton Tuesday. He was wonderful! His new book is called Unafraid, and it’s about all of the things that we fear and how to find hope in the midst of our fear. Here is a picture.
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When I arrived at work this morning, there was a survey for employees aged 50 and up.
I think it was meant to be a "how can we make the workplace a better place for those of you who are 50+" kind of thing, but unfortunately it didn't come across that way at all.
I can sum up all the questions with ... "how can we encourage you to retire already and really, why are you still here"
My husband figures that some 20-something work experience student in HR was told to create a survey, and that was the result.
There were about 30 questions like that with words like "winding up our employment", "easing out of the work world" etc., and then a comment section at the end. I (politely) gave them a bit of a blast and pointed out that those of us at 51 years old probably have 16-20 years of employment left. We're still climbing the ladder! We want education and experience opportunities that could put us into higher band level positions with better pay.
I just hope my comments give someone something to think about. A bit of a shift in the obvious preconceived ideas conveyed in the survey.
If the survey had been directed to people in their mid-60s who can actually access their super and the gov't pension, it might have been different, but it'll be a good 12 or 13 years before I can even look into getting ahold of all that so that I can potentially retire! Sure ... I'd like to go now and keep buying those lottery tickets but ...
Anyway, meanwhile, since I don't have one foot in grave, I will continue to work, attend uni, cycle, and enjoy life!
If I've inherited my grandmother's genes, I could have a long, long way to go.
Machka in Oz
Machka - I don't blame you for your reaction and I think it's right on. Folks in their 50's are often coming into their prime!
I was happy to be working part-time and easing out of the workplace when I turned 60, but that was more of a function of not liking some aspects of the job and stressful co-workers than just wanting to ease into retirement.
The only thing I can think of is there's some long range staffing planning going on so they are trying to figure out what to do with all the folks who need jobs in the next 10-20 years. HHmm.... maybe the earlier they can get people to cut back to part time or retire, they less they'll have to pay in retirement benefits as well?
Hard to say. I'm glad you gave them some comments.
Lanette
SW WA State
One of the ways they have cut costs in the past was to encourage people to retire, and then not replace them. And we did hear that they were thinking about that again. So when I got into this survey, I did wonder if the whole point was to count up the number of people who may indeed be thinking about retirement.
This survey would have gone to several hundred people (big department) and if 20% indicated that they were preparing for retirement, the Powers That Be may have to prepare for that in two ways ... one may be that they can say that there will be natural cost cutting as people retire, and the other may be that they'll actually need to consider hiring more to cover the work, if too many retire.
So if that's what it was about, I can understand it ... but it really did come across like someone quite young, with no concept that someone over 50 could still be viable, wrote it.
Machka in Oz5 -
It’s Friday!
Evelyn, glad to hear you had a good day.
Mary, thanks for confirming the kettlebell routine. I think I’ve decided that it’s best to just use my kettlebells at home. It just takes me too long to cool down and I hate to put my work clothes back on while I’m still sweating.
Becca, sounds like Lee is doing well and progressing. I’m sure his body is trying to heal and wants to sleep to help the process. Good for you doing your walking. That will help with your stress as well. ((Hugs))
Liz, welcome. Sounds like you did super in February. Your clear goals is perfect for staying on track. Congrats on the weight loss.
Lisa, enjoy your low stress day. You earned it girl.
Kelly, where do you come up with those great ideas for your kids. Wish I had you for a day care provider when my DD was growing up. Maybe you can start an adult day care? I’d sign up. I live in Vermont.
Joyce, your pain issues sounds awful. Do you have any idea when it will end.
Machka, I work in Human Resources and a work survey like that has red flags written all over it. Please tell me the survey was given to all employees and not just 50+. Identifying employee ages is a no no here (and embarrassing for the employee). Good for you blasting them with a well worded response. I do agree with Lanette that they are looking long term and estimating turnover do to retirement. We do that where I work but we don’t send out surveys. Sheesh.
Do some shoveling when I got home last night. My husband’s back isn’t good so I told him he was NOT going to shovel. I like to shovel and the exercise is good. Only problem last night was there was so much snow I ran out of places to put it. The snow is up to the deck so I can’t push the snow off the deck. I made a tiny path to the wood, but if it snows again not sure I’ll be able to do that again. Hopefully our plow guy will plow today. With two cars needing to park, it’s getting tight.
Hugs, Terry buried in snow in VT
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Machka, I work in Human Resources and a work survey like that has red flags written all over it. Please tell me the survey was given to all employees and not just 50+. Identifying employee ages is a no no here (and embarrassing for the employee). Good for you blasting them with a well worded response. I do agree with Lanette that they are looking long term and estimating turnover do to retirement. We do that where I work but we don’t send out surveys. Sheesh.
It was sent out to everyone, but we were told that only employees that were 50+ could do the survey, and were strongly encouraged to do the survey. It was an anonymous survey so I suspect that was how they got around the whole "identifying a person's age" thing. It's a huge no-no here too.
Both my husband (when I told him) and I did wonder about "age-ism" (discrimination ... especially with the wording of several questions) and I have a feeling that there may be a retraction and apology sometime in the next couple weeks.
I can't be the only one thinking, "What in the world was that?"
M in Oz7 -
Pppppp0
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“Just touching base here. I need prayers and good vibes. I had a big anxiety setback and while I am trying to stabilize DH shows me his blood sugar levels and they look bad. I feel pretty lost right now. Wanted to lose weight for my birthday but this is not the way to do it.”
Betty
Thinking good thoughts that your DH will learn & take care of his health.Must be a common reaction,as a SIL Was just told he is pre diabetic & to watch his diet.HE is 54 & DD says he is depressed.She is a nurse & had told him ages ago that with diabetes commom in his family,he needed to cut back & get tested often. Wouldn’t listen,eats like food is going out of style.
What to do? I have no idea.....as most ppl are gonna do what they want.We lost hubs bro to diabetes........his wife was badly diabetic,but he didn’t let that slow him down.Was an eating machine,especially sweets.In laws were healthy.
You can only do so much for another person,maybe just listen.In this area,at diagnosis,you are signed up with a nurse who works only with diabetics.Still.......the patient needs to be in charge of his health.Good luck ,hoping you find a way.
Pat in Oh7 -
Rocky and young Floyd11 -
Good morning Ladies -
Well, I've reached a new low.....weight that is (for this time around) which means my weight has finally gone down instead of bouncing up and down the same couple of pounds! I have entered the final decade of my journey. I'm close to my goal and should reach it by my self appointed deadline of our 30th wedding anniversary in May. I'm sure I'll be a up a bit on Monday, I'm having a glass of wine or a cocktail when our friends are over. I'm also having a sugar cookie. Calories won't be up horribly, but I will retain extra water for indulging.
I have now gone through all of the clothes stored in the shop. This time last year everything out there was too small for me. Now, I am proud to say that everything out there is too big. Oh shoot, I just realized that's a lie. I have bras out there that are too little. My boobs haven't shrunk as much this time I ordered label tape for my label machine so I can put pretty labels on all the containers instead of the blue painters tape that is on the boxes now. Yes, I'm a bit OCD about those things.
I have thoroughly cleaned my house this week, including nooks and crannies that haven't seen a cleaning in a long time. That helped get the weight moving again! I tend to use people coming over to motivate me to get things that I have been putting off done. Normally our friends in the neighborhood get together on an impromptu basis and congregate on the back porch. I don't really worry about it then, we're outside. Who cares, as long as the 1/2 bath is clean. Since they are coming over and we'll be eating in the dining room, I needed to clean it up do the floors.
Welcome to all the new ladies! Continued prayers for Becca and Barbie and their hubs. Congrats for the losses and hugs for the struggles.
Okie in the TX Hill Country9 -
machka that survey was ill advised and tone deaf in my opinion. Hope lots of folks filled in the comments section as you did
NYKAREN7 -
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Very sick kitty- hiding or sticking to my side like glue. Birthday, refrigerator repair, car maintenance, visiting with disabled niece, and covering shift at work for co-worker who is in finals at nursing school semester.
So just a drive by “hi” is all I have time for right now.
Sick kitty keeps me company while I eat lunch:
Rye7 -
Hi all!
Terry - I'm not envying you the snow! Is this an especially bad year? I'm sure Vermont is very nice the rest of the time.
Had a good day on the memoir. Wrote an extra section and changed things according to DH's pencil edits. I have repeated myself in places, so it's good to have that pointed out.
Last night DH said he wasn't sure the title reflected the content of the book . He said it was more a 'now you see it, now you don't ' kind of thing. I pondered on this and came up with
"NOW I SEE ME - A father. A daughter. Innocence abused.
I'm liking it so far. It plays on both the changes in perpective in the book plus the 'when I was a child .....see through a glass darkly. ..." idea.
Machka - Good for you for speaking up. 50+ = only just starting!
We went to the dump after lunch and I found a hulking guy to carry the huge tv to the recycling. Loads of pots, paper etc. I just love driving away in an empty car!
Then I decided not to do a long run, but to have a go at a 'fartlek'. (Google it) Not sure my dodgy knee was delighted, but I fartleked about for 20 minutes. Apparently that's what you have to do if you want your speed to increase. I hope my knee doesn't complain tomorrow.
So now I've given DH the rest of the memoir to read with the most important section in it. Hope he 'likes' it. It only takes me up to age 9, when we moved house and area, so it finishes, TO BE CONTINUED.
Making chilli for dinner.
Much love, Heather UK xxxxxxx6 -
Katie (((Hugs))) Rest in Peace, little Tripp.
I read Lisa's #MeToo blog and was surprised by it. It never occurred to me that the Me Too movement would be interpreted as "man-hating", but after reading the blog, I did a bit of web surfing and discovered that this is not a unique perception. Lots of people see the Me Too movement as condoning man-hating. I find this sad.
On a more cheerful note, by 9:30 this morning, I had accomplished the following: hard-boiled/steamed eggs in the Instant Pot, made deviled eggs, prepped the house for the housecleaner, fed & watered the dogs and let them outside, cooked chicken thighs in my Instant Pot for the dogs, deboned/skinned, packaged, and refrigerated the cooked chicken, cut up vegetables and, along with some stock I had from earlier in the week, started soup in the Instant Pot, brewed a delicious cup of coffee with Colombian coffee, turmeric, Chinese Five Spice, cinnamon, and heavy cream (yum), sorted yesterday's mail, took scraps to the compost pile, cleaned up dog piddle on my carpet, scolded Molly, and, finally, averted a near-disaster involving a box of dog toys too close to the fireplace. Now the dogs and I are taking a little rest while Catalina finishes cleaning.
Karen in Virginia10 -
Heather Was the other title you were considering "A Very Nice Man"?0
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Hopping on just to give you a giggle: DH just came up to the kitchen from his office, where I am preparing lunch for the kids. He asks, "What's with the bag of death in the fridge?" lol The bag of death is the bag of broccoli and mushrooms that I cleaned and prepped to go with tonight's pineapple chicken and quinoa! He is allergic to mushrooms and hates broccoli (and all green veg). He is such a pill. KJ 12
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Becca: It seems like there is a lot of good news for you and your DH. Major surgery takes some time to stabilize and I'm glad they aren't sending him home too early.
Lanette & Machka: A teleporter would have been a very nice way to travel to see our kids, with the bonus of no exposure to the germs of all the sick folks who were flying when we were aboard. It seems like it would be a huge advantage for anyone who needed to travel with a pet, too. It wouldn't be put in the baggage hold and die. :grumble:
Heather: DH has been excited about a product he saw on This Old House, a PBS series. It is a vent installed where the old vents are located. Each "vent" opens or closes to allow hot and/or cool air from the homes furnace and air conditioners into the room. It works with the old furnace & airconditioner already in place in the home. ecoventsystems.com is the link that we got from PBS.
Liz: Welcome! It sounds like you are doing very well with your meditation challenge. Stop by regularly & join the conversation. :flowerforyou:
Kelly: My kids are adults with children of their own now, but they would have loved being in your daycare. I wish there had been someone like you in our neighborhood back then. You are absolutely awesome.
(((Betty))): I am sorry that you are experiencing so much stress. It sounds like your DH needs to go to the doctor. Sending prayers. Diabetes is a life changer, but it can be successfully managed. Several close relatives have it. Is your DH a type one diabetic or a type two? Type one needs insulin; type two can be managed with just diet and pills. I hope that your DH is seeing a competent specialist. There is a learning curve for either type. Management is all about medication, lifestyle & calories in and calories out.
Yoga in half an hour & I'm still in my jammies. I'll see you later!
Katla in beautiful NW Oregon
"So many of us believe in perfection, which ruins everything else, because the perfect is not only the enemy of the good; it's also the enemy of the realistic, the possible and the fun."
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Karen - Yes, A VERY NICE MAN has been my working title all along. DH thought that the book wasn't so much about my father, but about me and my changing and growing perceptions. NOW I SEE YOU is a possibility, but that sounds like a thriller and may have been overused. I do talk about my difficulty with mirrors in the book and being in my own body. I'm still pondering, but I think I like it. It might cause people to stop and notice.
Love Heather UK xxxxxxx6 -
Karen you are on a roll! NYKAREN2
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well I bought out the Christmas tree shop lol, well lets just say , I will have a nicely dressed summer dining table outside for guests in my zen den patio lol.. a dear friend of mine had to put there 19 yr old cat down today , going to visit them and give them my condolences... took a dear friend of mine a turtle cast iron trivet , that was my grandparents, when she was young she ended up in an antique store with her parents,bored out of her skull, she saw this and asked her mom what it was and her mom told he and bought it for her, Karen her ,husband and 2 children lost a pooch and there home in a fire 3 yrs ago and she lost alot of belongings, precious things that she had collected over the years, her mom passed from breast cancer 10 yrs ago and her family has raised over a 1/4 million dollars for the 2 hospitals here in the state. and they own a nursery in the next town over. wonderful wonderful people, and her mom came back as a great blue heron like mine .. she was so thrilled with the trivet and another one of her friends brought one too.. so love flows freely when it needs to. 9
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I think I'm liking NOW I SEE ME - A father. A daughter. Innocence abused.
Hmmmmmmmm.
Love Heather UK xxxxxxx7 -
Machka-Yeah, I'd say that questionnaire could have been handled better. It does sound a bit like age-ism, but they were probably just fishing for information for future positions open. Either way, some one should probably take the young writer of the questionnaire in hand and show him a better way to compose them.
Katie- Aw! Poor Tripp! RIP little man. Peace and comfort to his family.
Glad your "twinge" is getting better and Nice that you got a photo of the author of Unafraid. Sounds like a very interesting subject!
Terry-Most of my daycare activities, I have been doing for years. When I first started doing daycare, I was bored out of my mind, so I really think all of the party days and activities came from me needing to liven things up and make it interesting for me. Way back then, there was no internet, and I got most of my ideas from magazines (Family Fun was a godsend) and from talking to other parents. Now we have websites everywhere to get ideas. The best place is probably Pinterest.
Betty- So sorry for your stress and anxiety! Hope you can find peace and let some of that go!
Karen VA and Lisa-I am kind of over the MeToo movement. Over it, in the sense that, I myself am aware that there are many, many, to the nth women in the world who, at some point in their life have been harassed or abused by a man. That stands to reason, that there are many, many, to the nth men out there that have, in some form or another harassed or abused a woman. I think we have reached the tipping point where we can't arrest all of them, press charges against all of them; but we are in that place where we need to make change happen. It is very hard to be right here on the edge of change, to see women so close to having more say in everything. Women having the muscle and hopefully using the muscle the right way and not abusing it. That said, I have a son. I can't be a man hater. I married one, gave birth to one, am helping raise even more of them. I want them to have equal success and chances as my daughters. BUT...genetically speaking, I think women are better equipped to be leaders, as women tend to have a "pack" mentality and think of the whole rather than themselves.
Katla- Thank you for the nice compliment! I got a giggle when I saw your almost last sentence about you being in your jammies, still. Come on over!
Rye- Happy birthday! You slipped that in very quietly! Lots of love to you!
ttfn xoxoxo KJ6 -
Okie- Whoot! Congrats on your loss! Cheering over here!!
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Okie, congratulation on the weight loss. I use people coming over to motivate me to clean too. Unfortunately, we don’t entertain except about once a year. Lol
Rye, kitty looks depressed which can happen. Hope he or she is better soon. I think a lot of cuddles are in order.
Heather, VT is a beautiful state and snow like this happens about once a winter. Because we live on a dirt road, spring is “mud season” because of the snow melting. But summer and fall can’t be beat. I like the new title. Also “Innocence stolen” might fit.
Karen, Man hating??? Too bad the Me Too movement is seen by some that way. I never thought of it that way.
Kelly, you should have told you DH that he was wrong and it was a bag of life.
Forgot to mention in this morning post that I’m down 1.8lbs. Now how could I have forgotten that? I’m finally going in the right direction.
Terry10 -
Woo hoo Terry!
Okie3 -
Do any of you play Pogo Scrabble online? I am addicted to that game.
Carol in GA1 -
Happy World Sleep Day!
“World Sleep Day is … intended to be a celebration of sleep and a call to action on important issues related to sleep, including medicine, education, social aspects and driving. It … aims to lessen the burden of sleep problems on society through better prevention and management of sleep disorders.” Think we should all celebrate with a nap this afternoon!
Beth – That does not sound like a fun adventure. Glad you and your husband made it home safely!
Michele – Welcome! You’re on the right track… logging everything should help you figure out what’s going on with your weight.
Brennerjlb – You don’t have to wait until your birthday… we’ll let you sneak in here a little early!
Liz – Whole30 sounds like an interesting challenge. I know I’d benefit from a regular practice of meditation, but I struggle to set aside time for it.
Machka – Ugh, that survey sounds positively insulting and potentially actionable. Definitely the product of someone who doesn’t have a clue.
Okie – Congratulations on the new low!
Today I’m doing an upper body workout. Which is to say, I’ve pulled of the 1950’s sparkly linoleum from our bathroom floor and now I’m laboriously scraping up 80 years’ worth of mastic and other goo from the wood floor underneath. Right now my arms feel like over-cooked noodles! Hands are shaking a bit, so it’s obviously time for a long break. Maybe I’ll post photos later.
Y’all take care!
-Yvonne in TX8 -
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Fitness and losing weight While mostly it was a journey to abate aches and pains, I admit a small amount of vanity and how I would look was motivation.
Last year at this time I hurt. I hurt when I stood up if I sat longer than 5 minutes. I hurt standing longer than a couple of minutes. I routinely awoke in the middle of the night not only from hot flashes, but because I was in pain. Holding a book longer than five minutes hurt. Acid indigestion and reflux were pretty much constants. I hobbled around like a cartoon 90 year old lady - because my feet and legs were screaming in pain.
Given that I was just about to turn only 52 and I couldn’t take any over the counter meds (except Tylenol- which didn’t help one whit) I just turned a switch. Not mini actions, complete revolutionary change.
I started with a very restrictive one month elimination diet: no sugar, no gluten, no legumes, no dairy, no trans fats, no refined foods if possible. I started with 30 minutes exercise a day (generally walking, dancing in the garage, or exercycling). I read everything free I could get my hands on about health fitness and aging.
I came out of the elimination diet determined to keep all the eliminated foods to a minimum, especially gluten and added sugar. I picked up MFP and severely restricted my caloric intake. I found a swimming pool and we scraped up the money for me to join the fitness center by getting rid our our cable tv. Started swimming and going to aqua exercise classes.
Two months or so in (June) I had lost only 10 pounds or so, was exercising about 20+ hours a week and eating 1200 calories of mostly whole foods. I was hungry and felt like crap - but I could now walk to the store or gym without being winded. My acid reflux and indegestion was gone. I hobbled and hurt a little less than before.
I kept going. I found this group and the Strong Women book recommendation and added strength training to the mix. I experienced some awful hangries. And some spectacular fitness related failures. (Anybody in my neck of the woods need a bicycle I couldn’t afford and I can’t safely ride?).
Days where I didn’t think about pain started to become more frequent. My confidence grew and I remembered how much I love swimming in hot weather. I started taking photographs again. I heard about a job and had the audacity to put my name into the ring.
Fall came but I think someone forgot to tell my part of Texas - it was still summer stifling. I didn’t let it keep me from walking tho, averaging 15000 steps a day in October. I participated in a fund raising swim, was crushed and humiliated by my treatment at it - but was back swimming laps in my safe local pool the following Monday. The possible job lead became a job application with several almost dead ends. And by Mid October (about 6 months) my total weight loss for all this change was only around 20 pounds and down only one pants size.
But I kept at it. Learned about 5:2 fasting and started doing that. Got that job - and since I started, I have not sat at the desk at work for more than 1/2 hour total on any shift. I lift that moveable desk to it’s highest, and stand while I work. Sometimes I stand on one leg to work on my balance. I go to work early so I can stop at the swim pool beforehand and do some laps. I realized I’m sore a whole lot now, but don’t think about pain anymore. I sleep between hot flashes, no longer toss and shift in pain.
By the end of the year I was 40 pounds lighter. And my whole life was different.
This day it is closer to 50 pounds down. My 53rd birthday is not far off. But I could not even have imagined myself this way last year. And I’ll keep doing whatever I can to keep that former constant pain away. Last weekend I took some of that money I earn at my job and worked with a trainer to fine tune my weight lifting routine - giving me a much better but still safe and simple way forward.
Oh, yeah. When I started, I never let my eyes look at myself in a reflection. And if I could, I didn’t allow any pictures. I don’t do that anymore, and sometimes smile at what I see in photos or reflection. I even smile at the cellulite thunder thighs - I’m just not sure I’d recognize myself without them.
Just a story of a 360 degree revolution in weight and fitness. I’ve always been a jump off the high diving board type of person, tho. I wish micro-actions worked for me, it would certainly be less wear and tear on my loved ones nerves if nothing else. But I find it so easy to dismiss the micro action- deny it because it didn’t take a lot of effort. I find I personally stay in track better when I don’t want to waste great effort that has proceeded. Maybe (and maybe not) this personal experience can help someone.
Rye (who needs to get off her backside and do today’s hula hooping)
This. You and I are the same age, I'm one year behind you on this journey. I am not ashamed to say I have tears in my eyes. Thank you so much for sharing. I am truly inspired and motivated.8
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