Less Alcohol- April 2018- One Day at a Time

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Replies

  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,348 Member
    @sdogg626 Love hearing your thoughts. My mom is like yours. I never seen her overdo it. And she sips one glass of wine and makes it last all dinner. Although my Dad didn't drink when i was little, my parents tried to set a good example for us. Mom and Dad even distanced themselves from their hard drinking relatives, but for some reason, I still saw lots of drinking at weddings and parties. I imagine there is a genetic predisposition that some of my female relatives who don't drink have overcome. Good luck on your weekend workout plans! So, nice to wake up with no headache! xo
  • kittybenn
    kittybenn Posts: 444 Member
    @JulieAL1969 - thanks for sharing that reflection. So deep on so many levels. Really made me think. The situation with your husband has got to be tough. My husband is a beer drinker, and drinks every day - maybe two. He usually drinks in the early afternoon, esp when he's working outside in the yard, on our boat - whatever. He's typically done by dinner at 6. That's when I always started before I quit in January and moderated after that. So, it's not in my face, which would be hard for sure. I am desperately in need of hobbies myself, so let me know if you figure out any! I've been playing a little Words with Friends on my iPad, but it doesn't thrill me. I'm just not a big game person.

    I'm seriously thinking of not drinking this weekend, although it's my "regular" time to drink wine. I'm leaning toward the Julie method of waiting for a special occasion. We're going on a cruise in mid May so pondering being AF til then. We'll see how this weekend goes.
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
    @WinoGelato I can't drink unstructured but I recognize that debate. I was having it about this weekend but my wife settled it. We have a nice day planned and it will end with drinks outside. It is my allowance day so the drinking brain kicks in pretty early with all the excuses if I consider skipping. This time it was unnecessary. She doesn't drink very often and she never overdoes it. I am glad because I am not sure how strong I would be in @JulieAL1969 's and @sdogg626 's situation.

    Was it just shear force of will that helps you moderate when you drink? I haven't mastered that part yet. Last time I told myself I was cutting back and was shocked to see that by rote I drank the same amount. The drinking brain and the OCD brain conspired against me and the OCD part is a sneaky devil.
  • WinoGelato
    WinoGelato Posts: 13,454 Member
    NovusDies wrote: »
    @WinoGelato I can't drink unstructured but I recognize that debate. I was having it about this weekend but my wife settled it. We have a nice day planned and it will end with drinks outside. It is my allowance day so the drinking brain kicks in pretty early with all the excuses if I consider skipping. This time it was unnecessary. She doesn't drink very often and she never overdoes it. I am glad because I am not sure how strong I would be in @JulieAL1969 's and @sdogg626 's situation.

    Was it just shear force of will that helps you moderate when you drink? I haven't mastered that part yet. Last time I told myself I was cutting back and was shocked to see that by rote I drank the same amount. The drinking brain and the OCD brain conspired against me and the OCD part is a sneaky devil.

    I don’t know what helps me moderate, to be honest. Maybe a bit of my Type A personality. It’s kind of like with my weight loss and maintenance. Once I understood how many calories I burn and have a calorie target and a plan, I’m pretty easily able to stick with the plan and the target. Not that I never indulge or go over my cals, but I always know what the impact will be and offset it either before (banking cals for a special occasion) or after (cutting back for a couple days after I overdo it). Once I decided I was going to specifically try to cut back my alcohol intake, not have those hazy nights, bad mornings, and feelings of regret - I just did it. I look at the week ahead for alcohol intake just like planning my meals. I know when I would ha ea happy hour, or a girls night, or a planned nice dinner that I would want wine with. Just like I have an upper limit for calories because I know my TDEE, I now have an upper limit in mind for my alcohol intake too.

    That’s all I can come up with. Wish it was more insightful.
  • salleewins
    salleewins Posts: 2,308 Member
    Wow I am aspiring to be able to say 100 days AF, now that I hear that here! It is 78 I think now. It has been hard especially this time of year for me. Today I wanted to drink and forget the pain in the neck troubles of today. I was able to talk myself down. Thank God it worked. Also sugar rescued me once again. Alcohol was and is the bigger trouble Rather err on the sugar side. Now onto a better calorie limit tomorrow.
  • SunnyDays930
    SunnyDays930 Posts: 1,572 Member
    I know it was already addressed in here somewhere over the past few months but could someone explain what Annie Graces' 30 day challenge is? Do you pay for it? Is it something available on line? Thank you - Jen
  • kpsyche
    kpsyche Posts: 345 Member
    Polo265 wrote: »
    Just checking in. Today is my 100th day alcohol free. I still haven't gotten control of my food situation. Where I used alcohol to help me sleep, I now eat sugar and carbs before bed. It isn't as though I'm even hungry. Last night I even got up after midnight to eat. So, now, I really have to buckle down and get a grip. Congratulations to everyone for all those awesome alcohol free days.

    You're not alone... I do the exact same thing since I stopped drinking. I'm not hungry either; it's almost as if I just have to do something to keep my hands and mouth busy :/

    And yeah, well done again everyone
  • islandbeez
    islandbeez Posts: 162 Member
    JenT304 wrote: »
    I know it was already addressed in here somewhere over the past few months but could someone explain what Annie Graces' 30 day challenge is? Do you pay for it? Is it something available on line? Thank you - Jen

    https://www.alcoholexperiment.com/

    Here should be a link, @JenT304 It is free to do the 30 day experiment and I highly recommend it. Each day there is new video by Annie and then a private journaling section to put down your thoughts on the day's topic. It was very helpful to me. I was nearly through This Naked Mind, but making the application of each lesson to myself and my life made this whole process so much more peaceful.
  • kittybenn
    kittybenn Posts: 444 Member
    @Polo265 - I SO agree with this planning idea. I try to visualize myself in the situation and plan exactly what I'll do and specifically which AF drink I'd ask for after I have my allotted one or two glasses of wine.
  • kittybenn
    kittybenn Posts: 444 Member
    @SanDiegofitmom - we continue to lead parallel lives. I was on the waiting list at the library for the Mark Hyman book and just picked it up yesterday. I've done his 10-day detox, and it was rough. It really helped with the sugar demons though, so I may give it another shot. He's no great fan of alcohol, but says the key is moderation, which means one glass of wine or 1 ounce of hard liquor per day max.
  • salleewins
    salleewins Posts: 2,308 Member
    Hi Friends, I am enjoying peace and solitude this weekend. For the first time in years (or ever) i have the house to myself for two days. The kids and husband are gone. So, Last night I went to a happy hour and had a cosmo. It was pretty good, but not too satisfying. My cheeks flushed a little bit and after I drank it, I knew not to have another one. I was feeling relaxed. Had no ill effects but a slight headache this morning.

    Today, I went to a fair and shopped with my girlfriend and had a glass of wine. And then at dinner another wine. All normal and planned and short pours. I havent fallen off the wagon entirely although it may appear so. I decided this weekend, I would give myself a pass and if the inclination hits, I'd have a little alcohol. But I told myself not to open anything at home. Just be happy with the wine I had out to dinner.

    What has changed is that the desire to keep having more alcohol. I mean after the one cosmo, the old me would have, of course, ordered one more. And maybe a third. But I felt fine with just one.
    Today, the two short pours probably equaled a regular glass of wine. Again, no buzz but still enjoyed it.

    I still plan on continuing being AF overall but for these two days, I indulged. I'm eating sour bread toasted with butter and delicious jam for dinner! More indulgences!

    I will be mindful of the slide. I know that it can start this way by having alcohol two days in a row. And then maybe a third day. And then all that hard work will be wiped away. I wont let that happen.

    I also dont know why I am feeling that it's ok to let myself have alcohol today and yesterday. I better analyze that tomorrow. LOL
    Happy to see that many of you are doing very well AF.

    It all sounds mindful to me. Glad you are having fun. I like your new picture. ENJOY the solitude and lack of responsibility. :)
  • salleewins
    salleewins Posts: 2,308 Member
    JenT304 wrote: »
    Hey everyone! At my daughter's baby shower today, Granny (me) had a couple of weak mimosas but that was it. The former, less mindful me, would immediately think to buy more wine/spirits on the way home after the party. I didn't even want any so that is a big win for me. I know I will sleep soundly tonight and wake up happy tomorrow. Enjoy the rest of your weekend :)

    Sounds good! You look way young to be a "Granny". Glad it was all fun. :smile:
  • erikNJ
    erikNJ Posts: 1,009 Member
    kittybenn wrote: »
    A friend brought this to my attention today. Really good read. 'Binge drinking has become completely normalized': Has boozy mom culture gone too far?
    “Mommy’s wine has become a pop culture trend, a marketer’s dream and a hashtag,” said Dr. Crystal Tennille Clark, a psychiatrist and assistant professor at Northwestern’s Feinberg School of Medicine who specializes in women’s health. “I do think we’re losing sight of what a problem (drinking) could be. Many people, whether they’re men or women, don’t appreciate the risks of drinking.”

    Very interesting. I think of this a lot. Whenever I’m on social media I always notice the normalizing or romanticizing of heavy drinking.

    And working for a beer wholesaler I get to see all the marketing firsthand. It’s basically like sexism, racism, classism and ageism are accepted in this business. We have meetings almost weekly with our brewery partners where they pitch products as “we want to capture the female drinker, the millenial drinker, the hispanic drinker etc etc etc.”
    Really a thinker
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,348 Member
    edited April 2018
    Good morning all! There is this strange, rarely seen, bright , yellow thing in the sky here in Ohio! I think today will be a great day to get lots of exercise and go out to lunch. Hope your weekend has been moderate and active.
    @erikNJ Great points! In advertising, there definitely has to be marketing oriented to specific niches. You see the behind the scenes in your business. Thanks for sharing.
    @salleewins Thanks for your support always. Hope your weekend is happy.
    @JenT304 What a beautiful day to share with the ones you love! A new precious baby on the way for you. Life is good. Xo
    @Orphia Congrats on 82 days AF. YEs, it's funny how the mind thinks about when will be the moment I drink again or maybe you wont. I looked at my dry January app today, and saw this gradual progress of alcohol seeping back into my world. January and February - 0 days ; March. 2 days; April. 4 days. So, when or if you decide to drink, I'm sure that it will be manageable because you have proven you can abstain for several months.
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,348 Member
    @sdogg626 You are doing very well! Such an improvement over the past. How did the workouts go? I was thinking of you! Xo
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,348 Member
    islandbeez wrote: »
    JenT304 wrote: »
    I know it was already addressed in here somewhere over the past few months but could someone explain what Annie Graces' 30 day challenge is? Do you pay for it? Is it something available on line? Thank you - Jen

    https://www.alcoholexperiment.com/

    Have you seen that Annie Grace had a few live sessions going on last week? I love reading her emails. I will look into the challenge!
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,348 Member
    NovusDies wrote: »
    @WinoGelato I can't drink unstructured but I recognize that debate. I was having it about this weekend but my wife settled it. We have a nice day planned and it will end with drinks outside. It is my allowance day so the drinking brain kicks in pretty early with all the excuses if I consider skipping. This time it was unnecessary. She doesn't drink very often and she never overdoes it. I am glad because I am not sure how strong I would be in @JulieAL1969 's and @sdogg626 's situation.

    Was it just shear force of will that helps you moderate when you drink? I haven't mastered that part yet. Last time I told myself I was cutting back and was shocked to see that by rote I drank the same amount. The drinking brain and the OCD brain conspired against me and the OCD part is a sneaky devil.

    One of the things, I found with myself was that after abstaining for a big chunk of time (I did for 2.5 months) , you get empowered because you put in the painful work of getting through cravings. Maybe try a 21 day detox and see if that will help you master moderation. Wishing you success always. Xo
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,348 Member
    sarahbums wrote: »
    i've made it through the whole week alcohol-free! It wasn't even on purpose really, I just didn't feel like drinking at all. Not even my once weekly bottle of wine.

    i'm starting to realize that a good amount of my drinking these days has just been out of pure habit, rather than genuine desire or cravings. I've just been automatically grabbing that wine every week without stopping to consider whether or not i actually want it...

    Great week, Sarah!
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,348 Member
    kpsyche wrote: »
    Polo265 wrote: »
    Just checking in. Today is my 100th day alcohol free. I still haven't gotten control of my food situation. Where I used alcohol to help me sleep, I now eat sugar and carbs before bed. It isn't as though I'm even hungry. Last night I even got up after midnight to eat. So, now, I really have to buckle down and get a grip. Congratulations to everyone for all those awesome alcohol free days.

    You're not alone... I do the exact same thing since I stopped drinking. I'm not hungry either; it's almost as if I just have to do something to keep my hands and mouth busy :/

    And yeah, well done again everyone

    Awesome job kicking alcohol! One thing at a time. Now, you can work on your sugar cravings. I saw a cute quote recently, "Everything in moderation including moderation. "