Less Alcohol- May 2018- One Day at a Time
Replies
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My goal is moderation. It probably should be total abstinence but I just don't feel ready yet. I've progressed from only socially drinking, to a couple beers most nights, to at least a bottle of wine a night, to a bottle of wine plus several shots of vodka in secret. It took 15 years to get to this point. Always craving that unattainable "buzzed, happy, calm" feeling only occasional drinkers can get after a drink or two. Most mornings I have try to remember what unhealthy foods I binged on before going to bed. Last night was half a bag of cool ranch doritos and peanut butter straight from the jar.14
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I love to drink wine but there are times I drink too much in an evening then cannot sleep and get a terrible headache. So I'm in for the month of May. I'm curious to see how much better I will feel by abstaining for the month.5
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I have been stuck in a rut. My routine when I get home is two glasses of scotch on the rocks. Then a half bottle of wine and a craft beer to finish. I have started getting up at 4:30 to run now that the weather has improved. That in turn will hopefully decrease my intake. I guess I am not really trying yet but I am thinking about it.7
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jillanne1897 wrote: »My goal is moderation. It probably should be total abstinence but I just don't feel ready yet. I've progressed from only socially drinking, to a couple beers most nights, to at least a bottle of wine a night, to a bottle of wine plus several shots of vodka in secret. It took 15 years to get to this point. Always craving that unattainable "buzzed, happy, calm" feeling only occasional drinkers can get after a drink or two. Most mornings I have try to remember what unhealthy foods I binged on before going to bed. Last night was half a bag of cool ranch doritos and peanut butter straight from the jar.
Welcome. Do you have a goal set for what "moderation" looks like?
It helped me a lot to pick a "number" or goal. Because otherwise, I was telling myself it was moderate when it really wasn't.
There are probably different ways to approach this, but I found it really helpful to pick a number to define what "moderation" meant to me (for me, it's 1 drink on weeknights and 2 on weekends). I knew some nights I wouldn't live up to my moderation goal, but other nights I would and that gave me a chance to relish the successful nights.5 -
Yes I need this too.4
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Hello friends.
For May I am going to limit myself to moderate drinking on Fri and Sat only. Yes I am changing my goal from the early months, and if I stop losing weight I will go back to only Sat again.
But honestly the warm weather is bringing on BBQ’s, the shore and Tiki Bars.
May sound to some like I am making “excuses to drink” but those who know me from the past four months know I am not a problem drinker, I am cutting back drinking for weight loss purposes. I am down 21.5 lbs on the year and have 30-40 to go. I will not let drinking get in the way of my goal!7 -
Yay for May.
First goal is to skip my scheduled allowance on the 6th. As some of you know I have not been loving the almost commitment I have felt towards my allowance days. My second goal is no hard liquor this month at all. On the 20th I plan to stick with wine which I have never had more than 2 glasses in one sitting in the history of my drinking. Now that I say that I hope that is true on the 20th. Ah well... have to live and learn... right?
I see @janejellyroll is here. I can't trust anyone who likes cake more than pie.
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Yay for May.
First goal is to skip my scheduled allowance on the 6th. As some of you know I have not been loving the almost commitment I have felt towards my allowance days. My second goal is no hard liquor this month at all. On the 20th I plan to stick with wine which I have never had more than 2 glasses in one sitting in the history of my drinking. Now that I say that I hope that is true on the 20th. Ah well... have to live and learn... right?
I see @janejellyroll is here. I can't trust anyone who likes cake more than pie.
We all have our flaws! 3 -
As someone whose hobbies are growing hops, brewing, winemaking, cidermaking (cider and beer always on tap in the house), drinking in moderation is a lifestyle and a daily challenge for me. I don't like the feeling of being drunk, so I'm rarely there...but alcohol calories are still too many calories, and hard on all of your body's systems. I try my best to look at what moderation behaviors look like on a daily basis, and I thought I'd share some of the things that trip me up and/or help me:
- Alternative drinks like tea: I try to always have some kind of tasty decaf herbal tea in a pitcher in the fridge. This helps with wine cravings, or just wanting to have something in hand if people are over. It can also be mixed into a weaker cocktail or wine spritzer if the flavors are right.
- Sparkling water: Always have it on your shopping list. Or on tap. Maybe it sounds gross to you, but I mix sparkling water with cider or wine so I can feel like I'm still having something.
- Challenge -- Idle drinking while performing chores, hobbies, reading a book, or on a long distance phone call. This is something I've been trying to overcome. Do I seriously need a glass of wine while I garden, stack wood, or play the piano? Absolutely not. I should be completely present. Do I need a glass of wine while talking to my mom? Maybe...but I shouldn't. I can do laundry, take a walk, or have a glass of herbal tea during these phone calls.
- Challenge -- Friends over. This is a hard one. This house is known for its cocktails and beer, so there is always drinking when people are over. I'm not quite sure yet how to temper this other than putting something else in my hand, or focusing on being a good host and making sure food and music is on point.
- Challenge -- Remembering that alcohol doesn't really enhance social interactions or cool experiences. Sometimes it does smooth awkward interactions or grease the wheels, but only in moderation; it's a fine line between fun and even more awkward. I never regret being sober or feeling great during those times when good memories get made. But I always regret being the drunk person. Plus, alcohol always complicates getting home from the thing.
- Drinking should not = relax. I used to have a drink right when I got home from work. And then a couple more either while cooking, while eating dinner, while reading a book before bed. It wouldn't feel like the day was complete unless I finished the drink routine. I've cut this back to one or less than one, and realized how much I was self-medicating from my workday and escaping from the things I wasn't handling in life in general. Now I'm trying to incorporate a hobby, yoga, or music in place of the drink. Idle hands.........
I love this. I struggle with most of the things that you have laid out.
I'm not new to myfitnesspal, but I am new to the forums and I'm looking for new friends and a new support group to help me in areas I want to improve.
Alcohol consumption is a major hurdle for me, I've improved from frequent drinking recently. Drinking almost every day, to drinking Fri-Sun, to drinking Fri&Sat, to now only drinking on Saturdays. Picking up a yoga class Saturday mornings has really helped with that last improvement.
I'd like to get to a point where I only drink on occasion. I'm not looking to completely abstain from it at this point in my life, but it's a definite crutch for me that I'd like to be free of!
I'd love to hear advice on how to move away from the feeling of needing alcohol to unwind on the weekend. It's caused some unneeded rifts in my relationship as well as help stalled my weight loss!6 -
Either way, my main mechanism to reduce alcohol has been to not let myself have a drink until after dinner. Whereas I really feel like I want a drink before I eat (or while I'm preparing dinner), that desire tends to go away after I've eaten. I'm not sure I understand it, but I'm sure it has something to do with 'depriving' myself on multiple fronts at the same time (smoking, food, and alcohol).
For me, the reason is because I'm hungry and I sooth hunger with drink. The earlier I eat dinner, the more successful I am in moderation.
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I'd love to hear advice on how to move away from the feeling of needing alcohol to unwind on the weekend. It's caused some unneeded rifts in my relationship as well as help stalled my weight loss!
If you are like me, which you probably are not. You might ask yourself if that is a convenient lie to justify drinking or if you really need it to unwind? I never liked my own reason so this was a lie I would tell myself. For instance my family can be stressful and after they visited I might say "after that I need a drink" but the truth was I was going to drink anyway.
If I were being really honest with myself I would say that there have been less than a dozen times over the years (I am counting 4 right now) that I actually self-medicated due to super high anxiety.
That is not to say you are lying to yourself. Different people have different situations. I am just voicing my experience.4 -
I met a young woman at the gym this morning and after about 2 minutes we realized I was her junior English teacher in 96-97. She shared with me some tough times she’s had in the 20 years since she graduated. She said, “Today is 2 days alcohol free for me.” I said, “Today is day 9 for me.” She was shocked at first (I was her TEACHER) but then teared up and hugged me. I think it helped her to realize we’re all human. Don’t know why this happened but I feel like the universe was at work. It made me happy that I’m working on being AF right now.19
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I'm in on an alcohol-free May.
I've been wanting to cut down for a while, and now that I'm back on MFP again, I see all the extra calories I've been drinking. Plus, I always feel better when I give myself a break.6 -
I'm in on an alcohol-free May.
I've been wanting to cut down for a while, and now that I'm back on MFP again, I see all the extra calories I've been drinking. Plus, I always feel better when I give myself a break.
Welcome! Somehow it is easier to hit a goal when you put it out there like you have. Sounds like you have experience skipping a month but if you want to talk about it you will find this thread very supportive and understanding. After all, they haven't kicked me out yet.3 -
I have been stuck in a rut. My routine when I get home is two glasses of scotch on the rocks. Then a half bottle of wine and a craft beer to finish. I have started getting up at 4:30 to run now that the weather has improved. That in turn will hopefully decrease my intake. I guess I am not really trying yet but I am thinking about it.
Think the morning run will only help with reducing alcohol dependence if for no other reason than you’ll run further, faster, harder. That will motivate you to keep at it. More NAD+ going to good use and not to metabolizing alcohol.3 -
Hi Friends, It's so nice to see this place hopping! I am doing the 30 day challenge so on May 24th my 30 days will be over. I have a one day get out of jail card I've given myself because before the 30 day challenge I planned on having a drink while I'm away with friends this weekend. But I am thinking for any of you who are trying to have a one month dry period. Once you hit ten days, it's like magic happens. For some reason, you crave much less than you did before. I think that the first five days are grueling. You may want to give up and say I'll try again next month. But don't. I am positive you wont regret making it to 5 days and then 10 days and then 21 days... it will be refreshing to see how good you'll feel.6
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https://www.alcoholexperiment.com/home
For those of you who like a specific plan or need some structure for your May , here is the link to the 30 day challenge with Annie Grace, the author of This Naked Mind.
For anyone trying to cut back, best wishes. I think there's only 2 percent of the population who simply cannot moderate (hey , that's me! ). So, most of you can moderate successfully. I love how you're all writing down your goals on this thread or even write it on paper. Moderation is a great way to cut calories and reduce that belly bloat. Keep us updated. We love hearing from all of you. Xo2 -
Here's a guy I listen to when I need motivation. His name is Kevin O'Hara and he is always hiking and breathing hard (LOL) when he speaks, but he has some good wisdom.
https://youtu.be/Qiueo1nVyF8 0 -
One more video. This is Craig Beck , the Stop Drinking Expert and author of Alcohol Lied to Me.
He's a straight talker and this is more for people who cannot moderate. But if you want some motivation, listen to some of these videos.
https://youtu.be/T3eIiS-Rl4k 1 -
Tough day at work but stayed AF15
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@JulieAL1969, I'm holding you to that "magic" happening tomorrow (Day 10 for me). I'm still craving alcohol, but the stops and starts since January have pretty much convinced me that I can't moderate. I'm finally saying to myself, "You know good and well that 'just one' will mean starting all over." Once I drink at all, it takes me a good week or more to gear up to go AF again, even for one day. So it's just not worth it for me. It's disappointing. I really do enjoy a nice glass of wine or a nice martini. Annie Grace says that once your brain gets to a certain point, there is no going back to moderate drinking. Sigh. I'd like not to believe that, but my experience so far this year backs up what she says. Years of daily drinking have changed my brain.
@Norminv, well done!!5 -
@donimfp I found the first 2 months were the hardest -- lots of things would trigger me to think I "wanted" (not needed... nobody ever needs a drink unless not having one would cause potentially dangerous withdrawal in which case you should be seeing a Dr most likely anyhow). By the end of the 2nd month and throughout the third I rarely thought about drinking; I certainly didn't think about it every day, or even every week, anymore.
Now, at basically 6 months, I only really think about it when I see this thread (and the thread doesn't make me crave alcohol or want to go off and have a drink, just makes me think of it... if that makes sense).7 -
I haven't drunk alcohol since January 31. Three months or more, and I forgot to commemorate it till now!
(I used to drink a beer and one or two glasses of wine every day.)
Enjoying my streak, and not worrying about if/when I will end it.I've been pretty much drinking a bottle of wine every night for the last 4 years. The most I've gone is 2 nights of no alcohol. Every morning I regret it and try to recall what I binge ate after the bottle is gone and I go to bed. I'm disgusted with myself and the weight I have gained as a result. I'm joining this group for motivation and inspiration because I feel like I'm ready and need to change. I'm 43. widowed, mom to 3 kids
@Canuk2015 Hugs, and welcome. Your post jumped out at me.
One of the main things that got me to really start thinking about having a break from alcohol was something a friend on MFP said, which I've mentioned in earlier threads.
Be kind to "Tomorrow You".
Don't lumber yourself with feeling terrible or feeling guilty in the morning.
The same person who is having another, and another, and another drink, is the same person who will wake up feeling like crap.
Pay it forward to yourself. You'd be kind to a stranger. Be kind to Tomorrow You.As someone whose hobbies are growing hops, brewing, winemaking, cidermaking (cider and beer always on tap in the house), drinking in moderation is a lifestyle and a daily challenge for me. I don't like the feeling of being drunk, so I'm rarely there...but alcohol calories are still too many calories, and hard on all of your body's systems. I try my best to look at what moderation behaviors look like on a daily basis, and I thought I'd share some of the things that trip me up and/or help me:- Alternative drinks like tea: I try to always have some kind of tasty decaf herbal tea in a pitcher in the fridge. This helps with wine cravings, or just wanting to have something in hand if people are over. It can also be mixed into a weaker cocktail or wine spritzer if the flavors are right.
- Sparkling water: Always have it on your shopping list. Or on tap. Maybe it sounds gross to you, but I mix sparkling water with cider or wine so I can feel like I'm still having something.
- Challenge -- Idle drinking while performing chores, hobbies, reading a book, or on a long distance phone call. This is something I've been trying to overcome. Do I seriously need a glass of wine while I garden, stack wood, or play the piano? Absolutely not. I should be completely present. Do I need a glass of wine while talking to my mom? Maybe...but I shouldn't. I can do laundry, take a walk, or have a glass of herbal tea during these phone calls.
- Challenge -- Friends over. This is a hard one. This house is known for its cocktails and beer, so there is always drinking when people are over. I'm not quite sure yet how to temper this other than putting something else in my hand, or focusing on being a good host and making sure food and music is on point.
- Challenge -- Remembering that alcohol doesn't really enhance social interactions or cool experiences. Sometimes it does smooth awkward interactions or grease the wheels, but only in moderation; it's a fine line between fun and even more awkward. I never regret being sober or feeling great during those times when good memories get made. But I always regret being the drunk person. Plus, alcohol always complicates getting home from the thing.
- Drinking should not = relax. I used to have a drink right when I got home from work. And then a couple more either while cooking, while eating dinner, while reading a book before bed. It wouldn't feel like the day was complete unless I finished the drink routine. I've cut this back to one or less than one, and realized how much I was self-medicating from my workday and escaping from the things I wasn't handling in life in general. Now I'm trying to incorporate a hobby, yoga, or music in place of the drink. Idle hands.........
@cammeer Wow, fantastic insights! Needed quoting again for latecomers. Great to have you in here.4 -
@kpsyche how inspiring!
I am at 100 days today AF and honestly I have thought about drinking every day. I don't need an excuse to drink, but I am sure that is how it started. I would love to not think about drinking every day. The mind-set has lessened and the pull has lessened, however. I have to pass a liquor store right up the street on my way home. There actually have been times I have forgotten about it. I have not gained weight like I was. I will check to see what I have lost after this. I am working on many goals, have picked up new and old hobbies and am WAY better off without it consuming my life and defining me.9 -
Thank you and that is inspiring to me, too @Orphia I like "Pay it forward to yourself. You'd be kind to a stranger. Be kind to Tomorrow You." I have been trying to treat myself better. Treating others better than myself has helped get me to drinking like I was.
Congratulations to everyone on making May goals!4 -
Near the end of October, I was almost 10 lbs heavier and on a gaining slowly trend. Not earth shattering in loss, but I will take it. I have had bouts of sugar binging at times since being AF. That is starting to lessen overall. I am working on meeting my weight loss goal and maintaining it this year. I hope!6
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Like Julie, I am also on Day 10 of the Alcohol Experiment. People, it is well worth your time. And she is right, something happens at day 10 that you just feel so much better. I can't tell you how many times I nearly caved especially days 3-6. Getting through that first weekend is tough. But I keep telling myself, I CAN DO HARD THINGS. I even stuck that note on my fridge. I am feeling so much gratitude for all of you and this thread. It has really helped me turn things around. XXOO9
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You are doing great @JenT304. I like your attitude.You are right, this thread has really helped change things around for me. Thank you @JulieAL1969 and thank you all!!5
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