Less Alcohol- July 2018- One Day at a Time
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Hi all! Thanks for the nod @NovusDies - I do think my ability to be successful in my mindful moderation approach is due largely to the fact that I’ve had great long term success with a similar mindset around food, nutrition, weight loss and now maintaining a healthy weight. And to that point...
I also think those who are focusing on health and weight loss in addition to efforts to limit drinking should read @Orphia great post above and take a look at the linked most helpful threads. I’ve been an active member of this community for 5 years now, sticking with it even after meeting my weight loss goal about a year or so into the process. There are so many helpful members in this community and there’s a tremendous amount of woo and pseudoscience out there so wading through that BS to figure out what is really important can be challenging - but the thing is, weight loss really is simple, it just isn’t easy. I think many of you have had similar epiphanies about going AF or carefully moderating. It certainly isn’t easy, but if you can wrap your head around it and figure out what YOU need to do to stay motivated and on track with your goals then it can be so simple it’s hard to figure out why you just didn’t do it sooner!8 -
And since a few folks in the June thread encouraged us focusing on moderation not just abstinence to keep posting about our practices...
I was mostly on track this week - since the beginning of July with the holiday week and a family camping trip we were taking I’ve had 2 Days AF and 4 days drinking in moderation. The campground we stayed at had a Winery on site - talk about dangerous for me! The good news is it’s Missouri wine so it’s too sweet for me to really enjoy. I went up with my father in law and we did some tasting, he bought me a bottle to thank me for letting him join our trip but I’m not sure I will open it! One other evening my sister in law and I had a couple glasses at dinner and then split a bottle watching fireworks. That was a little more than I intended to drink and my sleep wasn’t great that night, but didn’t really have any other issues.
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@WinoGelato thank you for posting re moderation. Not all on this thread are looking to be AF, and though arguments could be made that we're all following a one day at a time approach, I look at total abstinence and 'planned drinking' a little differently. My goal is not abstinence, it's moderation in all things, food, alcohol, and exercise-- balance in everything.6
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Yummy AF mocktail 1/3 c cranberry/black cherry juice, 1/2 fresh lemon, can of Pure Life sparkling raspberry lime carbonated water, 1 tsp pure maple syrup....Delish!!
Hope everyone is having a great weekend!4 -
spygirl2014 wrote: »@WinoGelato thank you for posting re moderation. Not all on this thread are looking to be AF, and though arguments could be made that we're all following a one day at a time approach, I look at total abstinence and 'planned drinking' a little differently. My goal is not abstinence, it's moderation in all things, food, alcohol, and exercise-- balance in everything.
That’s exactly me also! I know not everyone can moderate alcohol, just like not everyone can moderate their intake of ice cream or chips - but a moderation mindset works well for me. I do want to continue to post about that here so that we support the original concept of “less” alcohol, whatever that looks like for you. And even though I’m drinking more often than many here - it’s still so much less than I was last year at this time when it was mindless moderation bordering on mindless excess, not mindful moderation like I’m practicing now.3 -
lorrainequiche59 wrote: »Yummy AF mocktail 1/3 c cranberry/black cherry juice, 1/2 fresh lemon, can of Pure Life sparkling raspberry lime carbonated water, 1 tsp pure maple syrup....Delish!!
Hope everyone is having a great weekend!
That sounds lovely!
For a quick, weekday mocktail, I have 1/3 juice topped up with sparkling mineral water.
I've been having apricot nectar juice, or guava juice lately.
For weekends or treats after a long run, I add AF bubbly instead of the water, or dry ginger ale, which both add more calories.3 -
Hello all!
It's been awhile since I've posted. I recently got back from being out of town in San Francisco for a work conference, and then fun. Definitely have been drinking more than I'd like.
I've also decided that I am just going to do my best to not drink for awhile, period.
Hope you all are doing well.
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WinoGelato wrote: »spygirl2014 wrote: »@WinoGelato thank you for posting re moderation. Not all on this thread are looking to be AF, and though arguments could be made that we're all following a one day at a time approach, I look at total abstinence and 'planned drinking' a little differently. My goal is not abstinence, it's moderation in all things, food, alcohol, and exercise-- balance in everything.
That’s exactly me also! I know not everyone can moderate alcohol, just like not everyone can moderate their intake of ice cream or chips - but a moderation mindset works well for me. I do want to continue to post about that here so that we support the original concept of “less” alcohol, whatever that looks like for you. And even though I’m drinking more often than many here - it’s still so much less than I was last year at this time when it was mindless moderation bordering on mindless excess, not mindful moderation like I’m practicing now.
You've done so well cutting back! Mindful moderation is now your new normal.
That's what it's all about. Making gradual changes so that we don't overdo it, feel deprived, and crash and burn.
"One day at a time", indeed.2 -
I don't think there's ever been an issue with those of us that aren't abstaining. I've been here since January and found nothing but support. My goal has been to limit my daily beers to 6. Yes I drink that much, and yes its a cutback. A year ago I was drinking 9-10 beers. Everyone here has been supportive and non-judgemental. That has a lot to do with my overall success. We are a team, cheering each other on, and I want nothing more for you than your success.
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@Ke22yB I hope you have a nice trip and I am really glad you joined our little community here.
I don't have all the answers on what moderation will mean for me yet. I think drinking will be more rare right now while I still have a fair amount of weight left to lose. I can make alcohol fit in my calories but it is easier if I don't and easier is better.
The first moderation plan that I started in February was based on my fear that if I didn't drink at least every other week I would feel deprived and rebel. That might have been the case then. I don't feel that way now. To be honest that part still scares me a little. When my thirst dried up it was sudden and the first 2 weeks I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop and for it to return with a vengeance. As dumb as it sounds it was almost a relief to feel a little tempted again on the 3rd.
As more time passes I am sure my new normal will feel even more permanent but I can't worry about that because today is the only day that matters and unless something changes I can't think of a good reason to drink today.8 -
WinoGelato wrote: »That’s exactly me also! I know not everyone can moderate alcohol, just like not everyone can moderate their intake of ice cream or chips - but a moderation mindset works well for me. I do want to continue to post about that here so that we support the original concept of “less” alcohol, whatever that looks like for you. And even though I’m drinking more often than many here - it’s still so much less than I was last year at this time when it was mindless moderation bordering on mindless excess, not mindful moderation like I’m practicing now.
I needed something you posted so for me it is a good thing for you to continue to post here. Oddly enough, I needed something I posted in response to a different post of yours too. I have benefited from many people here in many ways but obviously some things will resonate more strongly as they apply directly to me and my personal situation.
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This doesn't necessarily have to do with drinking...it doesn't actually mention drinking at all, but someone posted it on Annie Grace's site. I found it incredibly thought provoking and moving. It takes around 17 minutes to watch.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NDQ1Mi5I4rg 1 -
There are definitely times I think this thread is going only for the alcohol free folks. But then I think of the incredible support I have received from these amazing folks in my steps to drinking less. Like @snoo61 and @WinoGelato , I drink way less than the person I was 7 months ago (and eat better). It’s to the point where it isn’t forced and planned out. It’s become routine to go to the gym all week. To eat healthy. To make decisions to drink less or not at all. Being able to share highs and lows here has been a big part of my growth.7
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It is a beautiful journey we are all on. For each of us it is unique. We all support and care for each other and never judge. Let's continue to post what works for our individual goals. I'm positive there are many people out there who don't post but read each of our posts, and it helps them in some way. I take nuggets from each person's ideas and try to be a better person. Whether you are moderators or abstainers, continue to express your views. I will also continue to share my success and struggles without reservation.
Being free to express what you feel, is such a rare thing. I feel more freely to express myself on this thread than in most of my personal relationships. Because it's a safe place without judgement.
That is what makes this thread work. Like the saying goes, "It takes a village." I am so happy to be on this journey with each and every one of you. Xo10 -
Thanks all! Again just to be clear, Ive never felt like anyone here was suggesting or implying that a moderation approach wasn’t welcome or helpful in these threads. It was really my own concerns from reading about some folks continued challenges with their abstinence goal, and some of the literature posted which suggests alcohol as a poison, that no amount is healthy etc - that made me wonder if me posting about successfully moderating would be counterproductive to the mindset that some of you find helpful for reaching your goals and controlling your intake.
The members in this unofficial group are so supportive and so positive it’s definitely clear that all are welcome here no matter what their individual goals.
Carry on all!9 -
And confession time - last night at a fireworks celebration I drank far more than I had planned - a full bottle of Rose. It’s one of a handful of times since starting in this group where I really let my intake get away from me. I didn’t feel drunk or hungover this morning, but I didn’t sleep well and I’m filled with the old regrets and “you should know better” thoughts. When packing my cooler for the event I thought - should I bring a whole bottle? Maybe one of those small box wines that only have 3 glasses in them, or maybe just a couple beers. But no, my drinking brain convinced me that someone else might enjoy some of my wine too so I should bring a full bottle to share, knowing deep down that most people would also be packing their own drinks. I also know that those sort of events are my weakness - I can handle social events at bars or restaurants where you have to order a drink from someone else pretty well, but sitting around with an open bottle right there, makes it too easy to keep refilling as you are talking and laughing and enjoying the nice weather.
After a week of a mini vacation I’m ready to log a few AF days under my belt and remind my sober brain that it is the boss around here!8 -
Interesting that the topic of moderation vs abstinence continues to be mentioned.JulieAL1969 wrote: »It is a beautiful journey we are all on. For each of us it is unique. We all support and care for each other and never judge. Let's continue to post what works for our individual goals. I'm positive there are many people out there who don't post but read each of our posts, and it helps them in some way. I take nuggets from each person's ideas and try to be a better person. Whether you are moderators or abstainers, continue to express your views. I will also continue to share my success and struggles without reservation.
Being free to express what you feel, is such a rare thing. I feel more freely to express myself on this thread than in most of my personal relationships. Because it's a safe place without judgement.
That is what makes this thread work. Like the saying goes, "It takes a village." I am so happy to be on this journey with each and every one of you. Xo
There is a Craig Beck video worth watching entitled, "Why Doesn't Everyone Get Addicted to Alcohol." There is a fine line between moderation and addiction, but he stresses that "many" people can drink moderately, so like Julie so eloquently stated above, none of us need to justify our moderation or abstinence, we are here using this space solely to support each other to be better people.6 -
Thanks @lorrainequiche59 I love Craig Beck. He's very no nonsense.
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@Orphia I just clicked the link you shared a few days ago about a MFP thread that has all the links you could ever need to successful articles/posts on using this program for getting healthy. Wow! I put a star on it, so I never lose that link. Thanks!1
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Day 14 AF today.....cant believe I have come this far this time.....it felt easier in January but this time its been hard13
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Starting on Independence Day - Alcohol Free 4 days, Alcohol 1 day (shared a bottle of wine with my husband dining out). I am feeling really good about moderating. We went to a couple golf and dine event last night and happily drank my water. I appreciate all of you sharing your journey.8
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JulieAL1969 wrote: »It is a beautiful journey we are all on. For each of us it is unique. We all support and care for each other and never judge. Let's continue to post what works for our individual goals. I'm positive there are many people out there who don't post but read each of our posts, and it helps them in some way. I take nuggets from each person's ideas and try to be a better person. Whether you are moderators or abstainers, continue to express your views. I will also continue to share my success and struggles without reservation.
Being free to express what you feel, is such a rare thing. I feel more freely to express myself on this thread than in most of my personal relationships. Because it's a safe place without judgement.
That is what makes this thread work. Like the saying goes, "It takes a village." I am so happy to be on this journey with each and every one of you. Xo
Thank you! Well said and I agree completely! xo3 -
Well today I wanted to drink once again. The problems were a mountain. However I enjoyed part of the day going out to eat with a friend and tried to help someone who really needed it. Half the day I was good on my diet, the other half well anyone here long enough, can guess how that went. Sugar.......................... All day at work there were a ton of motorcycles and even one looked like my late son's, too, on top of it being a bad there...............ugh. Work was the worst and I was filling in for someone..............Okay enough out of me. At least you can't be pulled over for eating a ton of sugar, better that, than too much alcohol. I decided after I joined the local gym Saturday, that when I can after work, I am going to go there before I go home instead of eat junk. Looking for the endorphines, dopamine or whatever those happy feelings are, lol, in a more positive way. Let's see if it works...14
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I was interested to see a television ad for San Pellegrino sparkling water (my favorite) yesterday. It had all the elements of the usual alcohol ads--good-looking friends enjoying a meal on the beach, laughing, pouring . . . but it was all bubbly water. Yay! I just found it interesting because I don't recall ever seeing such a thing. Sure, there are soft drink ads all over the place, but I've never seen a plug for adult fun meal time with water to celebrate and no alcohol in sight. I hope this means Madison Avenue is seeing a market for AF products and that this means demand is growing. Also, if such ads do their job, the message that fun can be had without alcohol should sink into the viewer's subconscious.10
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New to this group. I want to be AF - just not sure how to make it happen. I am loving all the posts here - makes me hopeful and motivated. I wanted to start July 4 - but drank twice since then. But I will keep going and keep trying. I will make it 30 days - I know I can.8
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OMG!!! Has anyone ever lost a day while being SOBER??? I had a "Twilight Zone" moment yesterday when I woke up thinking it was Monday. I even showed up at one of my jobs for work!! The whole family was home & I asked if they were still on vacation??? I would switch my day to Thursday and they said, "NO, it's Sunday" AND I said, "NO, it's Monday!!" I KNOW whoever it was recently that made a suggestion to me "#1 put down the wine," is likely thinking the same thing right now if they are reading this, but this was a stone-cold, sober moment!!
It frieked me out! I began to consider early-onset dementia but then thought that I didn't actually forget what day it was, I just thought it was a different day. LOL I remember having a dream about work the night before & when I awoke thought it was Monday. I don't normally listen to the radio & never looked at the day on my devices, not even the date....I'm driving through town thinking WOW, it's pretty quiet today, maybe everyone's on vacation.....little did I know that my brain was on vacation! Too funny!!
Oh well, now today feels like "Groundhog Day!!" If anyone has had any kind of similar experience, please share.6 -
salleewins wrote: »All day at work there were a ton of motorcycles and even one looked like my late son's.
I'm sorry. Hugs
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New to this group. I want to be AF - just not sure how to make it happen. I am loving all the posts here - makes me hopeful and motivated. I wanted to start July 4 - but drank twice since then. But I will keep going and keep trying. I will make it 30 days - I know I can.
If you look on page 1 of this thread the second post has some general starting tips from our hostess @julieal1969. There are also some other resources listed there when you are ready for one of them.
Please remember that any day that was once spent drinking that becomes AF is an achievement. So even if you haven't lived up to what you wanted since the 4th if any of those AF days were new to you that is not something to dismiss.
I am rooting for you to achieve your goal(s). Please stop in and post as often as you want or need. There are people here with varying experience from where you are now to several months and years of being entirely or mostly AF.6 -
I had drinks on vacation but not every day and only one day had a few. Otherwise I had one glass of wine. I was also happy as I maintained my weight. I am now down to the last 5-10 lbs so worried I would have added a few pounds with eating out all the time. I plan on going AF again until all the weight is gone.
@CSYounce I found Annie Grace's 30 day experiment so helpful on going AF for 30 days. I went to 60 days without too much struggle after the first week.4 -
Hi Guys! I'm back from vacation. Had an AF trip- my norm last year would have been 4 drinks a day times 7 days. I saved a lot of calories, I think. I hit over 13,000 steps each day and had a 19,500 step day. I know that I wouldn't have had the energy to do all that walking last year. I am nearly done with Jack Vale's book Kick the Drink Easily. I liked it because it debunked all the reasons we think we drink. Like boredom, depression, celebrations, stress.... he says alcohol does not improve any of these. Reading it was like sitting with a life coach. It was pretty good.
I think for me, after I get past about 10 days AF my brain starts to say "Hey, I can handle anything. ". and I start to see myself in the mirror more positively (skin brighter, belly flatter). It helped that my extended family just shares a bottle of wine at dinner each night- they're not big drinkers. It was much easier to stay AF this vacation than my girl's weekend in January.
This Thursday, I will be indulging- it's my birthday and I"m going out with 8 girlfriends, so I don't think I"ll have the wherewithal to abstain. I hope to one day though. I hope one day I wont view a birthday as an excuse to have a few drinks. Baby Steps right now.
@CSYounce Welcome to our thread. Like @NovusDies says go to the first page of this thread and you will find tons of great resources we all gathered through our time together.
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