Less Alcohol- July 2018- One Day at a Time
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@lorrainequiche59 That's a good one! I have never had that happen but I am sure that it's part of human nature. You made me smile! Sorry you wasted your Sunday heading to work though!
@donimfp Love Pellegrino and Perrier! And yes, I think that's an improvement seeing a commercial like that- basically imitating a beer commercial but with water! Awesome!
@salleewins I read your post with sadness. Sorry you had such a tough day- and seeing those motorcycle - that is really heartbreaking.2 -
fitand50inSD wrote: »Starting on Independence Day - Alcohol Free 4 days, Alcohol 1 day (shared a bottle of wine with my husband dining out). I am feeling really good about moderating. We went to a couple golf and dine event last night and happily drank my water. I appreciate all of you sharing your journey.
Great way to start the month! Happy you are on this journey with us!1 -
You know you have reached a good place when the thought of a drink does not cross your mind on your way back home from work....knock on wood11
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@norminv I'm so proud of you. I've followed your journey since January. Your determination inspires me!
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@norminv, I'm proud of you, too. And don't give up on the country music career. Keith Urban is totally sober. I agree with @JenT304 that you are an inspiration.
Re: the recent discussion of moderation and abstinence: I think it's wonderful that many of you seem to be having good success at moderating, especially the idea that alcohol and food moderation are similar. I really like reading your posts. I've been a regular, almost daily drinker since I was 27, and I'm now 62. My takeaway personally is that 35 years is just too much water (or make that vino) under the bridge to do anything but put the brakes entirely on. So that's my path right now, and I'm feeling more confident by the day that I'm getting there.
However, for you guys without those years of baggage, I encourage you to keep working that plan if it's working for you. I think we know when it's working and when we're kidding ourselves. I've kidded myself enough. The positive for me is that 2018 has so far been a very productive journey of exploration and revelation. Like others, I really appreciate this open and non-judgmental venue to work out our issues, make our plans, re-think our plans, etc.13 -
@donimvp I couldn't have said that better myself. After being a daily drinker for over 20 years, maybe 25 years, it's time to let that go. I really hope those that can moderate can continue to do so. That Craig Beck video about why some people can moderate and some people can't, was really good. Just like I could probably take an opiate for an injury and not get addicted, someone else could not. We are all wired differently.7
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JulieAL1969 wrote: »This Thursday, I will be indulging- it's my birthday and I"m going out with 8 girlfriends, so I don't think I"ll have the wherewithal to abstain. I hope to one day though. I hope one day I wont view a birthday as an excuse to have a few drinks. Baby Steps right now
I think this seems to be an ongoing struggle for everyone, in this group and out. We all seem to have some guilt when we want enjoy something when there is a health goal we are working towards. I did it last week when I came here and cried over how I spent July 4th and my nephews grad party. And then a day later I was over it and back focusing on cutting back drinking/eating and at the gym again.
Don’t let any guilt tell you how not spend your birthday how you want to. In this short time I’ve known you, I have complete confidence you will be right back on track the next day. And Happy (early) Birthday!
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lorrainequiche59 wrote: »OMG!!! Has anyone ever lost a day while being SOBER??? I had a "Twilight Zone" moment yesterday when I woke up thinking it was Monday. I even showed up at one of my jobs for work!! The whole family was home & I asked if they were still on vacation??? I would switch my day to Thursday and they said, "NO, it's Sunday" AND I said, "NO, it's Monday!!" I KNOW whoever it was recently that made a suggestion to me "#1 put down the wine," is likely thinking the same thing right now if they are reading this, but this was a stone-cold, sober moment!!
It frieked me out! I began to consider early-onset dementia but then thought that I didn't actually forget what day it was, I just thought it was a different day. LOL I remember having a dream about work the night before & when I awoke thought it was Monday. I don't normally listen to the radio & never looked at the day on my devices, not even the date....I'm driving through town thinking WOW, it's pretty quiet today, maybe everyone's on vacation.....little did I know that my brain was on vacation! Too funny!!
Oh well, now today feels like "Groundhog Day!!" If anyone has had any kind of similar experience, please share.
Count me in on this one. This happens when there has been a long tiring stretch of work with extra work days and more demanding clients or something for me. I totally forgot about another extra commitment with work or it got botched up somehow just this last week. I was really wondering about my memory then. I know all the heavy drinking has not helped me. It is going on 6 mo. sober and will be the 23rd. I am sure years of drinking, some heavier than others and some with years sober in between was still too much for me. When my schedule is off with work, can't get my daily water in or even plan how to do it because the clients are so demanding at times, then I can expect an off day. This groundhog thing happens to the best of us anyways at times without the drinking history. I am sure. Anyways we are either abstaining or moderating and trying to improve our health by doing this. I am sure our liver function, other organs are repairing and brain cells are increasing as we speak.4 -
JulieAL1969 wrote: »This Thursday, I will be indulging- it's my birthday and I"m going out with 8 girlfriends, so I don't think I"ll have the wherewithal to abstain. I hope to one day though. I hope one day I wont view a birthday as an excuse to have a few drinks. Baby Steps right now
I think this seems to be an ongoing struggle for everyone, in this group and out. We all seem to have some guilt when we want enjoy something when there is a health goal we are working towards. I did it last week when I came here and cried over how I spent July 4th and my nephews grad party. And then a day later I was over it and back focusing on cutting back drinking/eating and at the gym again.
Don’t let any guilt tell you how not spend your birthday how you want to. In this short time I’ve known you, I have complete confidence you will be right back on track the next day. And Happy (early) Birthday!
Thanks Erik! You hit the spot- when you said we have guilt when we want to enjoy something that we know isn't good for our health goals. That's exactly right. I know that happened to you on July 4th and it may happen to me Thursday.
Hey, I had a dream last night that I was out with my girlfriends and there was thunder and lightening. And we weren't able to go out; I've noticed that happens to me when I'm worrying about drinking while out. I have no off switch and I worry in advance that I'll drink too much. So, the dreams have started already. But over the last six months with you and the others, my odds of success are far greater than they were before Jan. 1st. Thank God for that!
Thanks for your message!
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My current thoughts are, it was impossible for me to stop just 3/4 weeks ago and now I'm back in control. This may indicate I can't do the middle ground.
I do have a certain sense of loss, if that's the right word, knowing I may never enjoy another drink again. Guess I'll get over it.10 -
I'm in this has been timely - I want to cut back from my current 3 -4 mixed drinks on fri sat (the weekend) so I was happy to see this
funny been batting it around for a year or so and have done a couple of Primal challenges for 21 days no problem but I do like to sit and relax with the hubby on our porch on the weekends.2 -
My current thoughts are, it was impossible for me to stop just 3/4 weeks ago and now I'm back in control. This may indicate I can't do the middle ground.
I do have a certain sense of loss, if that's the right word, knowing I may never enjoy another drink again. Guess I'll get over it.
You seem to know that you can’t handle the middle ground. I even remember you saying that back around February or somewhere in that timeframe. I guess the next step is figuring out if that really is he truth. Then applying it.4 -
lorrainequiche59 wrote: »OMG!!! Has anyone ever lost a day while being SOBER??? I had a "Twilight Zone" moment yesterday when I woke up thinking it was Monday. I even showed up at one of my jobs for work!! The whole family was home & I asked if they were still on vacation??? I would switch my day to Thursday and they said, "NO, it's Sunday" AND I said, "NO, it's Monday!!" I KNOW whoever it was recently that made a suggestion to me "#1 put down the wine," is likely thinking the same thing right now if they are reading this, but this was a stone-cold, sober moment!!
It frieked me out! I began to consider early-onset dementia but then thought that I didn't actually forget what day it was, I just thought it was a different day. LOL I remember having a dream about work the night before & when I awoke thought it was Monday. I don't normally listen to the radio & never looked at the day on my devices, not even the date....I'm driving through town thinking WOW, it's pretty quiet today, maybe everyone's on vacation.....little did I know that my brain was on vacation! Too funny!!
Oh well, now today feels like "Groundhog Day!!" If anyone has had any kind of similar experience, please share.
I have not only once, but twice now have gone to the airport for flights that were ticketed for a different day. Granted, I travel a lot, but it was truly Groundhog Day as I've had to repeat the awful 4 am run out of the house and all the *kitten* that goes with it!3 -
@NormInv I think having a sense of loss is normal- it's an ingrained habit. And I am proud of you too!1
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losergood2011 wrote: »I'm in this has been timely - I want to cut back from my current 3 -4 mixed drinks on fri sat (the weekend) so I was happy to see this
funny been batting it around for a year or so and have done a couple of Primal challenges for 21 days no problem but I do like to sit and relax with the hubby on our porch on the weekends.
I can see how the ritual of sitting on the porch is wonderful. Maybe try to substitute with some tea or a mock-tail.2 -
JulieAL1969 wrote: »Hi Guys! I'm back from vacation. Had an AF trip- my norm last year would have been 4 drinks a day times 7 days. I saved a lot of calories, I think. I hit over 13,000 steps each day and had a 19,500 step day. I know that I wouldn't have had the energy to do all that walking last year. I am nearly done with Jack Vale's book Kick the Drink Easily. I liked it because it debunked all the reasons we think we drink. Like boredom, depression, celebrations, stress.... he says alcohol does not improve any of these. Reading it was like sitting with a life coach. It was pretty good.
I think for me, after I get past about 10 days AF my brain starts to say "Hey, I can handle anything. ". and I start to see myself in the mirror more positively (skin brighter, belly flatter). It helped that my extended family just shares a bottle of wine at dinner each night- they're not big drinkers. It was much easier to stay AF this vacation than my girl's weekend in January.
This Thursday, I will be indulging- it's my birthday and I"m going out with 8 girlfriends, so I don't think I"ll have the wherewithal to abstain. I hope to one day though. I hope one day I wont view a birthday as an excuse to have a few drinks. Baby Steps right now.
@CSYounce Welcome to our thread. Like @NovusDies says go to the first page of this thread and you will find tons of great resources we all gathered through our time together.
That’s a fantastic achievement! Maybe I’ll check out that book!2 -
My current thoughts are, it was impossible for me to stop just 3/4 weeks ago and now I'm back in control. This may indicate I can't do the middle ground.
I do have a certain sense of loss, if that's the right word, knowing I may never enjoy another drink again. Guess I'll get over it.
Sometimes a new chapter in our lives comes with a feeling of loss over the old one. It is not like losing someone we care about but grief can come in other forms that are on lower ends of the spectrum.
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@salleewins Congrats on your lengthy sobriety!!!
Thank you for sharing your "senior moment." I actually googled my foggy brain issue AND I am, apparently, perfectly normal...so you can rest assured cause, likely, so are you!! Do I believe everything on google. YES!!!! IF it agrees with what I already believe to be true. LOL
The couple articles I read pointed out that the stress of life in this system can disorient us and memory loss on it's own is not a concern necessarily, but when it is coupled with other things such as lack of self care re: hygiene & other activities of daily living then a person may want to get it checked out. So unless you are forgetting to bathe or change your undies etc, along with forgetting what day it is, your likely ok!!
On the issue of drinking affecting our brains, I was watching an Annie Grace video the other day. Someone had asked her if she had ever relapsed since she went AF. Sometime during that video she began to talk about having fun without alcohol & how that is a concern some have when considering giving it up. So she suggested to think back to an earlier age when you didn't drink & recall some of the good times you had without alcohol. SO, I started thinking about when that would have been for me. Sadly, the first time I got loaded was at my sister's wedding. I was 13 yrs old.....eeeek!! I don't remember drinking for some time after that but know that incident was the beginning of trouble for me & I began regularly drinking on weekends when I was 15 & then smoking dope whenever I could afford it or could find someone to supply it. SO, I was self-medicating from a fairly early age. I had a bit of a messed up home life so I was running the only way I knew how. And all of that self-medicating likely had a huge impact on my brain development because I began messing around at such a young age.
I can't undo all the damage done, but I CAN stop any further damage.9 -
My current thoughts are, it was impossible for me to stop just 3/4 weeks ago and now I'm back in control. This may indicate I can't do the middle ground.
I do have a certain sense of loss, if that's the right word, knowing I may never enjoy another drink again. Guess I'll get over it.
Yes, it IS a loss giving up alcohol, it is a huge adjustment in lifestyle & there is a grieving process. SO glad you are in the zone & back in control.4 -
@spygirl2014 Thank you for sharing. Nice to know I'm not alone in messing up!! Yours sounds way worse though.....4 a.m. TWICE!! Yuk!!3
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How often do we check in? I think I will check in on the weekends since that is the time I will most likely not succeed. During the week it is a no brainer. My SMART goal is only one night no more than 2 cocktails right now. I like that we can set our goals here and get where we need to be.7
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@losergood2011 Hey there! Welcome to our group! Stay positive and see the first page of this thread with wonderful tips and tricks!! You can do it! Check in as often as you want!2
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I am feeling calmer and relieved back to AF following a few months experimenting with moderation. The hardest moments are in the store where I see a favourite beer and need to kick myself a bit to walk on by. Once I get home with nothing it's easy - I also love having more calories for food!
Reading all if your messages is fantastic. Thanks.7 -
losergood2011 wrote: »How often do we check in? I think I will check in on the weekends since that is the time I will most likely not succeed. During the week it is a no brainer. My SMART goal is only one night no more than 2 cocktails right now. I like that we can set our goals here and get where we need to be.
Every 15 minutes because we love to hear from people. Kidding of course.
The real answer is as often as you like. We are pretty informal.
Let us know if you need anything.
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I happened upon this thread on the morning of July 4th as I was updating my FMP information for the day. My occasional glass of wine had turned into a glass each evening to wind down while checking the computer and getting ready for sleep. Sometimes, it also included a glass while I fixed dinner. Occasionally, an extra after dinner with the family. But almost certainly, the one before bed. I had noticed, that over time, this had become a habit that I couldn't so easily just say no to any more. I could tell it was an issue, but oddly kept doing it.
July 4th, I saw this challenge thread and followed the directions to page 1 of the thread. I clicked on the link for "The Alcohol Experiment." It looked interesting. I love understanding the "nerdy" details of why, how... Anyway, I clicked on the option to start the experiment. Today is day 8 AF of the 30 day challenge. The first few days brought some crazy sugar cravings. I say crazy because I'm not typically a big "sugar" person. That was followed by just craving food. Fortunately, I normally follow a basically whole food lifestyle (other than the wine/beer) and within about 4 days was able to start getting things back in balance. Sleep is finally starting to improve some too.
I'm having to learn to create some new food habits now because I automatically have at least 150 to 350 calories more each day that I now need to fill with food. I appreciate this challenge thread being here and all of the information available from the 1st page of the challenge to educate on what alcohol is actually doing in the body and why it impacts us as it does.
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GardenMama I had crazy sugar cravings in the beginning and indulged to some extent. I am over it now. In fact I crave less sugar than before. I think about evening snacks now as I do have more room for food calories. I used to skimp on food to leave room for wine.4
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@GardenMama129 Thanks for sharing your story! Congrats on 8 days AF! Annie Grace is awesome- I view her as a friend. She's so down to earth that way. Happy you are doing well! Xo4
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