WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR JULY 2018

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  • LisaInAR
    LisaInAR Posts: 2,020 Member
    Rebecca - keep us posted, chickie... I know it's like 2:30 a.m. your time as I'm writing this, hope all's well this morning.

    Heather - Moving a lot is exactly what pared things down for me, and am so looking forward to actually buying books again, as we plan on this being the last house we live in.

    This week is when my traveling begins for August, and while not looking forward to it, I am looking forward to seeing some old friends in Texas while I'm there, if it's humanly possible. Will take some extra driving, but hope to have the energy to do so.

    Trying to just let things be what they will on the work side--not my usual mode, as I'm usually quite vocal. Hard to know whom to trust in the midst of chaos.

    On the bright side, all the work this weekend pushed me off my nearly two-month long stall, weight-wise.

    Love y'all,
    Lisa in AR
  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 10,097 Member
    edited July 2018
    Morning Ladies~
    I am up having my tea..
    Sean and I are going through what you are talking about now..my maternal grandparents where Antique Dealers, my mom was a garage saler and thrift shopper. thinking she would bring it home and resell it.. my parents really never had a ton of money~ we got by and weren't poor,but
    anyway so with my parents house was chock full of memories and tons and tons of stuff..
    My brother bless him has been doing tag sales to get rid of stuff.. we had an industrial size dumpster and filled that.. and now the rest is getting junk out of the basement.. Old piano,washer dryer.. and lots of junk...
    I am hemming and hawing over one piece that is left.. it was my paternal grandmothers and it is a drysink that has a tin liner..I have always wanted it,but where I am now I dont know where I would put it.. was going to fill with fake sand and put seashells which I have and fairy lights and then a piece of plexiglass over the top..
    What it is ,its generational the kids now a days want brand new ,nothing old, its a throw away society ..

    Oh Well I am working today 10-5 tomorrow off and 10-6 on weds, then over to Meriden.. will see how that works out..right now I don't feel the warm fuzzies over there...
  • cityjaneLondon
    cityjaneLondon Posts: 12,714 Member
    Rebecca - thinking of you. <3<3<3<3<3

    Karen - and others decluttering sentimental items - I did think about taking a photo of the item and writing a bit about it, where it came from, any memories associated with it etc, and putting it either into a physical file, or just one on the computer/Internet. That could be very creative if you were so inclined. It could be just a few words, or a poem or short story even. You would be honouring the item without it cluttering up your life. :D

    I had a coup this morning. Our big beech hedge at the front is getting very overgrown. DH has been having trouble with a sacroiliac pain so I was loathe to let him do it. The hot weather meant it was postponed anyway. I mentioned that we might ask the people who come every year to cut next door's enormous hedge to do ours when they come.
    This morning they turned up after our necessary rain to cut next door's hedge. I said we ought to ask them. DH was very reluctant as I think he felt he ought to be doing it himself. NO! I said I would go out in my dressing gown to ask them. He pouted. :o Next thing I knew he was going downstairs in his gym outfit and out to the front to ask the guys! :D
    He came back and said it was going to cost. But it was half the cost of what I had estimated was my top price! Worth every penny for him not to exhaust and injure himself.
    They haven't started our bit yet, but I have asked him to leave the cash on the side for when he goes out for lunch. My betting is the guys will treat it as an extra and just pocket the cash. :D
    I just love watching professionals do a job in a tenth of the time it would take us. It is certainly worth the outlay.

    Kim - I am not at all crafty, nor would I enjoy it, so wouldn't be taking on projects, but upcycling is a great idea for anyone who likes to do those things. :D Re purposing is a buzz word. :D We have a great programme on our TV every day called Money for Nothing, where they rescue tatty old stuff from the dump and repurpose it. It looks wonderful. I would buy the finished article, but I wouldn't make it myself. My limit is a quick "shabby chic" paint job, which I might do to the Welsh dresser as I have really gone off the pine look. We do have quite a lot of pine, which DH quite likes, but I don't. It reminds me of the 70s. I don't have any money or I would be a much bigger aesthetic tyrant than I currently am. :laugh: Perhaps that's a good thing.
    I have to remember - DON'T LET THE PERFECT BE THE ENEMY OF THE GOOD. :drinker:

    Love Heather UK xxxxxxx
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,615 Member
    edited July 2018
    LisaInNCNow wrote: »
    Machka: What I do to make my life simpler:

    You're already "chunking" tasks, as your "one thing" approach shows. That's been quite helpful in a complicated life, as is setting interim goals. Instead of driving toward an end goal that seems so far away, it's setting a goal that will move me toward it. That way I get the feeling of forward movement, even if it's at a slower speed than I'm inclined to want to go.

    Edit -I also have an Excel spreadsheet in a long, running table with one line for each day. Columns are phone calls/meetings, grant/project deadlines, and travel. Makes it easy to see what's coming up and let me get those out of hover mode in my mind. I check it daily.

    Yes, the "one thing" approach does give me a feeling of accomplishment. At the end of the day, I think about what I have accomplished, and if I can think of one thing, I'm OK ... I feel like I'm moving forward.

    I'm an Excel spreadsheet person too, and have been trying to set up our finances, and what's due when, etc. etc. there.

    And I have planned holidays using my Excel spreadsheets. In fact, that's how I decide what is the best flight combination to take between Australia and Canada and back.

    As for daily events (including holidays), I use a calendar. I can "see" that better for some reason. Years of using Outlook, possibly.

    I have a main list of all the things, and as they become more urgent, I slot them into days on the calendar.


    cityjaneLondon wrote: »
    Re organising. I am retired, so life is less hectic in general, but I keep a small diary in my handbag (purse) and occasionally synchronise it with DH. I have to put all his cricket days in there and he has to put my girly lunches etc.
    Generally I think I am an organised person. I only have to make lists etc very occasionally. I can hold logistics in my head quite easily. If I find they are preoccupying me then I write them down.
    When we have exchanged I will download a "to do" list from the Internet. There are loads. It is a hugely busy time. Thank goodness our decluttering is well under way. Usually "completion" is around two weeks to a month from exchange.
    My DSIL, who we were visiting this week, is a lovely woman, but she has huge difficulty in sequencing and logistics. I have heard it is a form of dispraxia. I have to keep well away when she is trying to sort something, like lunch, because it drives me insane. A simple procedure, like looking up a purchase on Amazon, is really hard for her. Booking a holiday is fraught with problems. When I heard her condition described on the radio it all made sense. Simple choices are incredibly complicated and she is a very slow reader who can't summarise at a glance like I can.
    She was a sister in a IC ward, so very capable, but I find it hard to watch the way she struggles with simple tasks. She qualified as a counsellor, but failed the final certificated exams as she can't marshall her thoughts in any order, or make a summary.
    She is such a lovely and capable woman. Do any of you recognise this syndrome?

    I used to be able to hold logistics in my head quite easily ... until all this happened. Not only did my husband lose brain power ... so did I. Not quite to his extent, but within days of his accident, even things like taking the bus became a huge challenge for me!! I had to write down the details of how to do that.


    Do you mean dyslexic or dyspraxic?

    I'm dyslexic ... and one of the things I struggle with is left/right.

    my-gps-has-learned-to-say-your-other-left-funny-car-pictures.jpg

    The thing that amazed me was that although my husband has a long list of issues, the first day he was up and walking, he was using one of those tall, leaning walkers and took off down the hall. As he was walking he said, "Right or left at the end of the hall?"

    There I was trying to work out which way was right and which way was left (I write with my right hand ...) when he said, I'll go right, and off he went.

    I'm standing there thinking .... "Really? How is that even possible???"

    Anyway, dyslexia also means that I slowly wade through all the reading I have to do. Words just don't organise themselves properly and some fonts are really bad.

    And I hate filling in forms!! I'm so slow at that ... I've actually had people take a form away from me and fill it in for me. Recently!!

    margaretturk wrote: »
    To keep simplify my life learning to saying NO. Also saying with no explanation or a simple one like now is not a good time. I rarely feel guilty for saying no anymore. I figure it is my time to spend and I need to use it wisely this is especially when I dealing with a personal crisis. I also respect when others say no for the same reason and try not to change their minds.

    I too am a list maker which helps me.

    I also do my five rule. Be happy to put 5 things away. Wash 5 dishes. Take five minutes to start a task. Often this is all I need to get going on something on my list. If I do not finish I am at least closer to being done the next time I have a chance to work on it.

    :heart: Margaret

    I've started simply saying "no" to people too. 4.5 months ago, I would have said "no" with "sorry" and all sorts of explanations etc. ... I'm getting much better at just saying "no".

    One day, I figured that I'm not sorry and I have my own reasons that are no one else's business, so I can just say "no". :)


    Machka in Oz

  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,615 Member
    edited July 2018
    wildhorsewendy wrote: »
    Machka, Making my life easier: I start every day with my writing journal and I write a list of things I'd like to get done,and at the end of the day I write in my journal to record how well I did at hitting my targets. I also have an egg-timer that I set for various activities so that I will know when I have "finished" and hit my goal. So ten minutes for piano practice, thirty minutes in the garden etc. Or I set a very small target such as "write 300 words on my current book" or "sew five patches on the quilt" When I make something very specific and small, I can usually talk myself into doing it! I am also trying to de-clutter our large family home and get rid of all things that aren't important to me.

    I might need to start doing the timing thing.

    GodMomKim wrote: »
    Hi Gals,

    simpler --- one of the things I am working on is for my age friends (not for the younger folks) working on limiting gifts to one “expected” gift a year, so Christmas or birthday not both, and accepting that time, or paying for a random meal/coffee/?? Is fine, but not expected - A bit less pressure…

    and lists ! I try to make lists of things to do/shop/ etc… then an errand may include many things as they are all organized and I don’t go in and out to many times.

    So for those of you with the white board idea, I don’t want to give up space for a white board but found that a mirror works just as well, so in my sewing room there are mirrored closets and that’s my business “white board”

    Gifts -- I quit doing that when my ex-husband and I split up in 1999. I'll do something small for Christmas for immediate family, but that's it. Definitely not birthdays! And this year, I've barely even acknowledged anything going on around me.

    Last year's Christmas gift for my sister-in-law and her boyfriend was to treat them to a Christmas dinner in a hotel. It meant that none of us had to cook Christmas dinner or anything!! :grin:


    M in Oz

  • kymarai
    kymarai Posts: 3,702 Member
    margaret Forgot to say I loved the pictures! Thank you for sharing. There are times when I would rather enjoy things without the DH for the same reasons, taking my time. He isn't into history stuffs so I like to go when I can enjoy.

    Kelly I know you are excited about the new things for the kids. I admire you! I did family day care for 3 years. While I enjoyed it, I was ready for adulting once my kids were in school full time. The ship parade sounds like fun!

    Re So sorry for your loss. (((HUGS)))

    Machka I have issues with my right and left! My DH says other right often-LMAO! My oldest GD is dyslexic. She loves to read, but finds it difficult. The strange thing is it is hard to help her with building things from a pattern,ie legos. She builds in mirror image! It is interesting and makes me wonder what her brain is really seeing.

    <3
    Kylia
  • KJLaMore
    KJLaMore Posts: 2,847 Member
    Kylia- Love the photos! Congrats on the car show wins! Yea! Fun weekend!

    Oh, one other thing I wanted to share. You all know I am a BIG list maker. Love to cross things off lists. That said, I do have times when I forget my grocery list. I spend the time planning meals, making the list, organizing the items on my list according to how it is laid out in the grocery store...then leave it on the counter. SO...every Friday morning I walk through my bathrooms, laundry, kitchen and take pictures of my cupboards, storage, and fridge. That way, I have a visual of what exactly I have on my phone (which I hardly ever forget).
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,615 Member
    kymarai wrote: »
    Machka I have issues with my right and left! My DH says other right often-LMAO! My oldest GD is dyslexic. She loves to read, but finds it difficult. The strange thing is it is hard to help her with building things from a pattern,ie legos. She builds in mirror image! It is interesting and makes me wonder what her brain is really seeing.

    <3
    Kylia

    My mother picked up that something wasn't quite right when I hung my clothing backward. She's a bit of a perfectionist so all the jackets in the closet were facing one direction, and I drove her crazy by coming in and hanging my jacket up so it was facing the other way. I didn't do it deliberately ... I didn't even think about it, just automatic.

    Then she tried to teach me how to pour out a pot like you do holding the lid against the pot to drain out the water, and I'd burn myself with the steam as well as looking incredibly awkward.

    She had already figured out that I was different with the jacket situation, and so after watching me struggle with the pot and lid for a while, she told me to switch hands, and that worked like magic!

    So there are a number of things I do "backward". :lol:

    M in Oz

  • okiewoman510
    okiewoman510 Posts: 1,316 Member
    Re - My sympathy on the loss of your mother. I will pray for your peace and comfort.

    Okie
  • klanders30
    klanders30 Posts: 2,569 Member
    becca sending <3 and strength

    Barbie how’s your healing coming along, is the pain lessening??

    Another beautiful day to work in the garden, after the gym of course!

    NYKAREN
  • maureli
    maureli Posts: 722 Member
    Hello everyone! I turned 50 a couple of months ago and thought this looked a nice friendly place to join in on. I've recently lost 20 lbs, would like to lose about 5 more. I am pretty active - exercise isn't my problem.....eating in the evening is my downfall.
    Looking forward to August!
  • margaretturk
    margaretturk Posts: 5,259 Member
    Heather Love your hedge. Our hedge looked like that when we moved in thirty years ago. Now because of rabbits, Japanese beetles, and shade from trees it is not as thick and full. We keep it because it makes a nice break between us and our neighbor. I like it better than a fence. It takes me three days to prune it. I do it by hand because the electric shreds the bark and adds to its woes. I think I wrote about it before and called it our diva hedge for all the extra care it requires.

    :heart: Margaret
  • 1948Peachy
    1948Peachy Posts: 1,511 Member
    Decluttering: Alison, I feel for what you and your brother are doing through. DH's parents owned an antique shop in the 1960's and most of the shop is in our basement. In addition, DH has collected and sold antiques for the past 20 yrs. That adds to the clutter. Plus the aunts and grandmothers stuff. DH is a hoarder. We have many beautiful and what was once expensive pieces but I am afraid the younger generation just isn't interested. So, my son will have a huge job to do at some point and just hope he will not just give it all away.

    Carol in GA
  • barbiecat
    barbiecat Posts: 17,203 Member
    Katla, I agree with your husband to leave the matter of the angry neighbor alone. Doing nothing is often difficult.
    Karen in VA, I was able to give away a lot of stuff when I got past the idea that the things were "valuable". They were of no value to me and they weighed heavily on my life. I gave things to the thrift shop. I didn't worry about them going to the "right" person. I was just glad to have less stuff in my house.

    Allie, I went to a seminar about getting rid of stuff and the first thing the presenter said was "Your kids don't want your stuff".

    Kylia, thank you for all your wisdom about giving gifts , what to do with memorabilia ,and how to deal with your husband's excess stuff.

    Kelly, I loved reading your post that included getting rid of things and then acquiring new things for your day care. I hope all the things you've acquired through your grant will bring joy to you and all the children.

    Heather, what a great plan to get professionals to trim that hedge. Now it looks great.

    Rebecca, I am thinking healing thought for you and your husband.

    My back is not any better. I'll call my primary care doctor this morning and hope to be able to see her very soon. I think they are very cautious at the ER about prescribing strong pain meds. The meds they gave me made no difference at all except that the muscle relaxer made me drowsy so I have gotten some sleep.


    <3 Barbie
  • 1948Peachy
    1948Peachy Posts: 1,511 Member
    Beautiful Janet OKC
  • Katla49
    Katla49 Posts: 10,385 Member
    Heather: I love your attitude about getting rid of things, but I can't seem to adopt it in my own life. I have a certain amount of burdens laid on me by my mom who wanted her treasures to stay in the family. The jewelry is easy. The piano and clock are not. :ohwell: Your hedge is lovely!

    Machka: You are lovely, whether or not you choose to color your hair. I think the light streak I see in your photo is very becoming. :flowerforyou: I am left/right challenged at times. Part of it is likely my own doing. As a teen I thought it was great fun to write with my left hand and practiced until it was passable. My right hand definitely has better handwriting, but as a knitter and in some other things I use both. On a dance floor, I sometimes get dizzy. :ohwell:

    Re: I am so sorry for your loss. Losing a mom is so hard. :broken_heart::heart:

    Barbie: I hope you are able to see your primary care doctor quickly and that you are able to get relief from pain. :flowerforyou:

    Janetr: Your ornaments are gorgeous! You are a talented lady. :smiley:


    This morning I went out to clean up our dog messes on the lawn, and there were plenty of them. There was also a mess made by some other creature and a flattened area of lawn. I wonder whether deer slept there.

    Thanks to all of you who sent kind words about the angry former neighbor.


    Katla in Beautiful NW Oregon
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 17,270 Member
    ...
  • coastalgosgal
    coastalgosgal Posts: 2,900 Member
    Long night. His eyes are still shuffling, so he just keeps them closed, so he doesn't get any nausea. Not walking very well. On a clear diet. Nothing is related to liver so that's good.
    I haven't eaten since yesterday about 11:00 am, so hey I guess I'm fasting y'all! When I hear from doctor. I shall carefully drive home and eat something.
    Rebecca
  • cityjaneLondon
    cityjaneLondon Posts: 12,714 Member
    Barbie - why is your back hurting. I know you had an op a while ago. Have you done it some damage, or is it just muscle strain? Have they x-rayed it?

    Done my bonus calories on the recumbent bike. I will run tomorrow morning early as it's much nicer with no traffic. Then I have yoga and after that coffee in the pub with the yoga group. Then my friend is coming up from Portsmouth on her way home to York to have lunch with me. :D

    DH had fish and chips in the pub and I had my "funny food" as he was out. >:) I had curry laksa, nice and spicy. Tonight I'm just having butternut squash soup from the freezer and some cheese and a bit of Parma ham. One slice of seedy bread.

    Much love, Heather UK xxxxxxx
  • SophieRosieMom
    SophieRosieMom Posts: 3,660 Member
    Barbie - hope you can get in to see your doctor soon. Glad the meds are giving you some relief - glad Jake is able to help with dog walking and chores. I so appreciate your tips on decluttering - addressing the physical AND the mental/emotional part.

    Heather - you are a girl on fire with your cleaning out and new house planning! That hedge looks great.

    Rebecca     - thank you for the update on your DH. With his vertigo - and what you've had in the past, I wonder if there's a virus going around? So grateful it's not his liver, and hopefully a run of the mill illness that is over soon.

    Katla - glad you enjoyed the Skinny on Fat episodes you were able to watch. Looks like there's another free episode on tonight for 24 hours. I'll post the link as soon as they email it to me. Your miffed former neighbor might have been suffering from the heat grumpies too. Hard to tell sometimes what sets people off for no good reason. Seems like so many people these days are on medications that tend to alter their moods (or maybe should be >:) I used to want to delve into the problems when confronted with odd behavior like this but now I just do a hasty apologize and exit the premises ASAP B) . When is your next RV adventure?

    Janetr - another stunning ornament! Where do you get your ideas? That apple pie your DH made sounded great. Bad boy, lol.

    Carol     - cute DGD! So neat that she is getting interested in the sport of running at an early age.

    Machka - your hair is super lovely, curly or not.

    So interesting hearing about those of you who have left/right problems. I've heard that a super brain strengthening exercise is to brush your teeth with your non-dominant hand. I tried it last night - I sure need more practice!

    Pip     - are you riding your bike to work in the heat today? Not so bad in the early morning. You are superwoman.

    OK ladies, it's going to be another hot one here. DH is mowing - mainly dandelion blossoms as lawn is brown. My niece in Indiana is in labor right now so keeping tabs on her thru my SIL. Hope all goes well for her.

    Going out to pump iron.

    Keep cool ladies!

    Lanette
    Sunny SW WA State





  • kymarai
    kymarai Posts: 3,702 Member
    :)
  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,412 Member
    Katla Concerning the treasures: I know if my mother was alive, she would tell me that her treasures may not my treasures, and she would give me permission to be rid of them. After reading the practical words from others above, particularly Barbie & Heather, I am looking at my heirlooms in a new light starting today. Keeping items that are useful or bring me joy will be my new mantra. Purge the rest.

    Concerning your angry former neighbor, I had a similar experience with a colleague recently. I have never had such an experience before! It was unsettling. If she was a friend, I would give her time to cool down & then ask her if she was still mad at me & did she want to talk about it. But I barely know her, & know of no reason for her to be angry, so as far as I am concerned, she owns it. Next time I see her I will be warm & polite as usual. I usually get along really well with people.

    Barbie. Thanks for the wise words. You are right. Most of my stuff is valuable to no one. Not even me. Somehow that is very liberating, and I thank you for that. Now what in the heck is going on with your back? I think some studies are in order to identify the source of your pain. Keep us posted.

    Karen in Virginia
  • 1948Peachy
    1948Peachy Posts: 1,511 Member
    Both of us grandmas are going to take the 2nd and 3rd graders to meet their teachers today. Really hoping the grandson gets and inspiring teacher this year who will help him to enjoy school a bit better.

    Carol in GA

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