The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living
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happy weekend everyone. My current NO ALCOHOL VICTORY. Went to my favorite Mexican restaurant that I have been going to for over 20 years. It was the first time in that 20 years that I didn't drink alcohol at the place. Felt great to enjoy the food and company sober! 24 weeks no alcohol!13
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Hi There! I was DD last night for a country music concert. I had to pick up three friends in different places in the city and then drive there. They tailgated and drank some more. No one was out of control though. However, my one friend pounded 12 beers probably in the course the evening; she looks unhealthy (beer belly). It reminded me how alcohol really affects our looks. It was ok being sober during the concert. I also analyzed the lead singer who ballooned over the years; he had a red face and looked awful. Then, I wondered if he's a heavy drinker. Those are my rambling thoughts....
This morning woke up sober and happy! That is a beautiful benefit of being sober- getting your Saturday mornings back!15 -
Hi All...nice to hear from others.
I'm attending a Gender Reveal Party this evening. I should say I'm "forcing myself" to attend. It's for my friend's daughter and there may be an interesting dynamic of people. I'll see and share if it is share-worthy.
Have a great evening!!3 -
Hi ALL
Rainy morning where I live....I like a lazy, rainy morning....occasionally!
The Gender Reveal Party was short-lived for me...I stayed a couple of hours and left as soon as the fireworks turned blue to reveal a boy was on his way soon. I knew a few people there, but most were strangers & I tend to feel a bit awkward in social situations anyway. I am ok one on one or a with a few people. This is something that I have just recently realized and I'm thinking that is part of my former reason for drinking in social situations, because I was somewhat anxious, but never sat with the feeling long enough to realize it...I just started to drink to take the edge off. So, my anxiety was particularly noticeable for me last eve. I held drinks for 2 people as they did something requiring both hands, but that was the extent of my contact with booze. Even my friend who does not normally drink had a glass of wine, but just one glass and no problem saying N...O...thank you.
It's interesting to me that my thinking has actually changed. I remember for the first long while of my sobriety, I "wished" I could just drink "normal" just have one and leave it, but I don't "wish" any more...I'm not saying I'm cured, but I know that I am healing and I just do not have the desire at this point. As I count my blessings for this day THIS is the first one on my list.
Happy, AF day to all 9 -
Lorraine,glad the reveal party was fun, people make fun of those parties but I tend to love the idea and think it's cute! Glad alcohol has no appeal to you,I've been in a similar zone myself and only felt a bit tempted once when I saw Bud light made special edition alien cans for an event being held out by area 51 I wanted the can as a souvenir but then I was like"where would I keep it anyways"? It's not like I'm a college student and decorates my room with boozy bottles and cans haha,hope everyone is well,I'm a bit sad it's so quiet here lately but I guess ebbs and flows, wishes for a wonderful AF day for us all🌺6
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Morning
Todays Letting Go is about Letting Go of Urgency"One thing at a time!!
That's all we have to do. Not two things at once,
but one thing done in peace
One task at a time. One feeling at a time. One day at a time. One problem at a time. One step at a time.
One pleasure at a time.
Relax. Let go of urgency. Begin calmly now. Take one thing at a time.
See how everything works out?
This is my Monday pep talk to moi and wanted to share with you.....for any of us who are feeling overwhelmed right now.
Have a GREAT Af day6 -
Nice Lorraine ❤️4
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Just what I needed. I was just posting about my bottle of wine a day issue.10
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Thank You for the Monday pep talk!4
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I'm doing very well, but I just saw I've missed nearly 1,000 posts in here.
Looking at my Nomo app:
601 days alcohol-free
$3,435 saved ($40 a week)
Last drank on January 31 2018.
I don't miss it. Alcohol doesn't seem comforting or pleasurable to me like some people think it is for them (or the advertisements make us want to believe).
I don't just look at the buzz and high of the first hour or two.
I see all the guilt, regret, anxiety, arguments, expense, conflicting thoughts, desperation, sickness, insomnia...
Douglas Adams wrote a book entitled, "The Long Dark Teatime of the Soul" - to me that sums up the feeling of when the sun is nearly over the yardarm and you want to start drinking to stop the worry and stop feeling crappy about everything. Get a quick buzz like a rat in a science experiment in the 1940s.
That's alcohol. That's the result of chemical effects the day after you drank (again).
It's not your fault you can't moderate. Totally not your fault.
Alcohol is to blame.
It's lovely to NOT drink. It's lovely not to desperately reach for a fake high that messes up your already borked chemistry.
It's lovely to look forward to feeling tired in the evening and ready for rest and relaxation.12 -
Hey Orphia welcome back! Your post is very inspirational! You are doing so wonderfully! It is great to hear from old friends. @NormInv are you still out there?!
I have started fresh with a full detox. Not just alcohol, but processed foods, fried foods, excessive sugar etc. I just turned 56 and like an old car, you have to do some maintenance to keep her running! I came back from a vacation 2 days ago a bloated mess. Am seeing my daughter in 2 weeks in Scotland and I want to look and feel my best. I found a youtube and put it on my tv called, "relaxing waves for home and office". Its just a video of the seashore and the waves rolling in. Its on my tv all day..like having an ocean view window. I know I will need this all winter. God knows it is better than the gloom and doom of the news! Wishing you all a healthy and happy day 5 -
Orphia, excellent post..........reasons I quit were that feeling the next day...........pure guilt, esp if I were around loved ones
I would sometimes drink wine in the evening and then later, wake up about 2 am with the extremely fast heart beats. I mean, I thought I was having a heart attack. Also, I was almost hyperventilating, my breathing was bizarre.....Like I couldn't get enough oxygen from a breath to my lungs,,,,,,,,,sweaty palms, nervousness, weird thoughts.........like it was a panic attack. I was so scared....scared I was going to die from drinking.....and I want to emphasize that I would rarely drink more than 3 glasses of wine.........I cant drink hard liquor, like gin ,rye , bourbon, etc...........my body cant handle more than 2 - 3 glasses of wine, but if I drank 3 glasses, it was like I drank a case.........my body just doesn't do well in processing alcohol.........which I guess is a good thing.....
also, my father, his father and his father were horrible abusive alcoholics.......he used to beat us as children when he got drunk...........I would have belt marks on my back for days, and blood would sometimes seep through..I remember one of the Catholic nuns confronted me about the bruises and marks.........I lied of course, but they knew his history.....
I haven't drank in almost 2 years and have more problems with a desire for chocolate or ice cream than Alcohol
I hope the folks out there know some day it will get where they will have more issues with food than alcohol....I never , never think or desire alcohol.......none..............I just dont think about it and there are a few bottles of wine here for company, but it never registers to drink.........lol, only when I walk down the ice cream aisle at the store, that is when I struggle...........
best wishes, and thanks for a great post.........14 -
First time checking in since 132 days I believe... should be 163 days now! Feeling ecstatic. Feeling in control. Won't lie, I've been thinking about drinking a lot, but not about going through with it. Just how nice some rum would be going down on a cold night, warmth, buzz and dopamine, but then I drink some hot black coffee and the urge goes away. Just my brain trying to trick me into thinking it's OK to slip because just one drink would be "nice and safe". It's not OK. It's never OK. Just one drink is a lie. If I were to dampen the seriousness of it in my mind and give leeway those little intrusive thoughts, "everybody drinks once in awhile with friends, it's a ritual stop being so serious", "one day I'll be able to trust myself having a drink or two once I earned it, it's worth it if you only do it once in awhile", that would be a one way ticket to falling back into the abyss I believe. I hope one day I can shake these doubts and stick to my guns, as hard as it is to say it, as hard as it is to fill the hole that it has left behind. I know that every day off the stuff is invaluable to my path... I know that I've undone a lot of damage already, physically, mentally and spiritually if you're into that. I got a lot to learn to fully rid myself of these thoughts. I believe the key to filling the black hole it has left inside of me will be by filling it back up with light as I continue to better myself and fill my life with good, positive influences and forces. The thoughts will pass, time will pass, and as long as I stay on this path I will one day emerge the man that I wish to be.13
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@IWillTakeBackMyLife Wonderful, inspiring post! I am proud of you! You are not accepting alcohol's lies. I love it. Kate from the Sober School once said something that really resonates with me; "Sobriety delivers what alcohol promises." I try to keep that in mind every time I think about how nice a glass of wine would feel...for about 20 minutes anyway.6
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Awesome to see all the action here
WELCOME to the new faces
@Orphia Great to hear from you again and it IS "lovely not to drink" Thanks for the reminder to check my quit drinking app...haven't for some time now.
@lloydrt So sad that you were so mistreated as a wee child. Alcohol and abuse seem to go hand in hand quite often, and is usually passed on through generations, but you've stopped the cycle and that is something to be proud of. Chocolate AND ice cream are now my weaknesses to replace alcohol too, but I'm trying to nip that.
@IWillTakeBackMyLife All I can say is Ditto to Jen's comment and you should be proud of yourself for taking control at such a young age and showing such maturity in that choice. It's definitely a matter of changing our thinking which affects improving our choices and then THAT will be reflected in a much more positive life.
@JenT304 I'm going to try to remember that saying "Sobriety delivers what alcohol promises" SO true
I watched a show on Netflix called Intervention last eve and the first episode was about a woman who had a severe case of alcoholism and after finally being convinced by the pleas of her loved ones she completed 2 months in a rehab center and was interviewed sober and what a difference and then just before it ended there were some updates about her moving back in with her husband and children and then the last sentence was "Janet says she drinks occasionally" I was SO disappointed for her and her family cause the writing is on the wall unless she comes to her senses, but that is the reality of our drinking brain. It wants us to trick us into believing that we don't "really" have a problem when we REALLY do...
Let's not allow ourselves to get tricked!!!
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Alcohol started to become a big problem for me in the past 2 years, since my marriage break up. I blamed it on that, but really I knew it wasn't the right way to deal with how I was feeling. Things came to a head in July this year and now I have been sober since 17th July. Decided to really make a change and lose the alcohol/stress weight too. No drinks since then, but I am celebrating tonight with 1-2 glasses of Moet, as I just sold my house. My partner will keep me accountable and I will keep me accountable too 7
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GOOD MORN to all Hope everyone has a great day 5
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Happy Sober Friday everyone!7
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Hello everybody. I am just starting AF for 3 weeks now. I have overdrank alcohol for most of my adult life. It became real when my blood pressure skyrocketed and couldn't get it regulated (200/130). It's a challenge everyday with temptations always presented to me, but I am encouraged by all of your success stories!12
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stride, I understand about that blood pressure........mine became elevated and since I don't drink, its about 115/75 or so...........
My primary dr emphasized the need to make sure my bp was normal, which is another incentive to have stopped.........my lipids are great, so you will definitely see a change in your numbers....best of luck.......and again, another reason not to drink.............
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striderkev wrote: »Hello everybody. I am just starting AF for 3 weeks now. I have overdrank alcohol for most of my adult life. It became real when my blood pressure skyrocketed and couldn't get it regulated (200/130). It's a challenge everyday with temptations always presented to me, but I am encouraged by all of your success stories!
Welcome....Yep, I too know about the high blood pressure. quit drinking at beginning of my journey last april and lost 72 lbs so far and dropped one of the BP pills (hoping to drop the other within time)...my BP averages 110/75 now,
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Well, last Thursday I did have that 2 glasses of Moet. Didnt really like the way it made me feel though that may be due to citalopram. I then went the weekend after without giving it another thought. I'm feeling blessed that I dont have strong cravings most of the time5
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Hi Friends,
I've had ups and downs these last few weeks. The job is exhausting this year- too many students. Yesterday I was fatigued all day. I have to find some balance. 7 -
I like your comment @JenT304 Sobriety delivers what alcohol promises.5
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On Netflix there is a new show about the brain. One of the 20 min. segments was about anxiety. I have anxiety and many drinkers do. I had a small panic attack at the grocery store after work on Friday. I had to escape; there was too much stimuli and I kept running into parents and students saying hi. Then, the lady at the bank made me doubt a transaction I wanted to make. And she was giving me her two cents (but trying to help). I got in the car and was in a sweat and drove home in a fugue state.9
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@RubyRed427 Interestingly I've been thinking about you lately and voila here you are. Your comment reminded me of a video on YouTube I watched by Lisa Romano...not sure if your are familiar with her, but she does work with codependency and your comment about anxiety reminded me of one of her latest videos especially your being affected by "too much stimuli" Her video is entitled "Empaths and Narcissists - Why They Attract Each Other" In it she talks about those of us who are born extra sensitive, not only emotionally, but that our other senses are heightened and that makes us vulnerable to becoming overwhelmed and while we have some awesome qualities, it can also have a downside that she addresses with some tips to help us cope with our awesome nature LOL
Hoping everyone has a great AF day and that each of us may eeek out a bit of joy for ourselves & those we love 4 -
@RubyRed427, I can so empathize! Grocery stores can be overwhelming. My sister-in-law once actually passed out from panic in a grocery store. I myself have trouble in Sam's Club. Too much. I think the lighting in there contributes, too. When I lived in Scotland in the 80s, stores were so simple. If you wanted to buy a popsicle, you just went in and grabbed a popsicle. I came home for a visit because my stepfather was battling cancer. He asked me to go to the store and get him some popsicles because that was about all he could tolerate. So I went to the store and almost freaked out. There were 9,000 choices, it seemed! I'd forgotten about how over-stimulating our American stores were, but after living elsewhere for awhile, it was so obvious to me. I guess what I'm saying is that it's not surprising some of us are sensitive to how packed full of stimuli our surroundings can become. We just have to develop strategies. I've learned, like you've said, that alcohol can really ratchet up the anxiety. I hope you have a relaxing Sunday!
I just watched the fall video on Joanna Gaines's blog (From Fixer-Upper--my neighbors up the road in Waco). It was super Zen. Lots of beauty. I recommend it. Their fall theme is "Wholeness." https://magnolia.com/fall-at-magnolia-market-2019/5 -
Happy OCTOBER 1 ... hard to believe it is October...I love the fall and am enjoying this particular day because it is warm and sunny and presents another opportunity to sit on the deck before work and enjoy the sun....
Today's Melody Beattie blurb is, "Be Who You Are" "In recovery, we're learning a new behavior. It's called Be Who You Are. For some of us, this can be frightening. What would happen if we felt what we felt, said what we wanted, became firm about our beliefs, and valued what we needed? What would happen if we let go of our camouflage of adaptation? What would happen if we owned our power to be ourselves? Would people still like us? Would they go away? Would they become angry?
There comes a time when we become willing and ready to take that risk. To continue growing, and living with ourselves, we realize we must liberate ourselves. It becomes time to stop allowing ourselves to be so controlled by others and their expectations and be true to ourselves - regardless of the reaction of others.
Before long, we begin to understand some people may go away, but the relationship would have ended anyway. Some people stay and love and respect us more for taking the risk of being who we are. We begin to achieve intimacy and relationships that work.
We discover that who we are has always been good enough. It is who we were intended to be.
Today, I will own my power to be myself."
Can anyone relate to this? Please share 3 -
Thanks, everyone for your kind comments. Very insightful. This week, I am making an effort to keep my evenings simple and got a massage tonight. No more art classes on Wed. nights which is a relief because it took all evening. I think it's true what @donimfp says, it is way too overwhelming sometimes to be in our stores. I know we're blessed with all the choices, but there's no need for that many.
@lorrainequiche59 Thanks for the video suggestion. I will watch her.
Wishing all peace ! 3 -
Hey Orphia welcome back! Your post is very inspirational! You are doing so wonderfully! It is great to hear from old friends. @NormInv are you still out there?!
I have started fresh with a full detox. Not just alcohol, but processed foods, fried foods, excessive sugar etc. I just turned 56 and like an old car, you have to do some maintenance to keep her running! I came back from a vacation 2 days ago a bloated mess. Am seeing my daughter in 2 weeks in Scotland and I want to look and feel my best. I found a youtube and put it on my tv called, "relaxing waves for home and office". Its just a video of the seashore and the waves rolling in. Its on my tv all day..like having an ocean view window. I know I will need this all winter. God knows it is better than the gloom and doom of the news! Wishing you all a healthy and happy day
Hey ya, yes still out here and hoping to start posting in here soon, you all are amazing and so inspiring!7
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