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The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living

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  • RubyRed427RubyRed427 Member Posts: 2,694 Member Member Posts: 2,694 Member
    Father Martin chalk talk on alcoholism. It's long but listen to it on a long walk. OR find Father Martin's talks in shorter segments. This man is brilliant; some people are born to speak and reach people.

    An alcoholic will not respond to treatment unless he wants to.....


  • lorrainequiche59lorrainequiche59 Member Posts: 817 Member Member Posts: 817 Member
    @RubyRed427 I didn't watch the video due to it's length but AGREED!! People do not respond to treatment unless they want to...that's why I don't think it matters what program a person chooses because they have to be ready for the change first....Whatever works for a person works because they want it to...although different strokes for different folks applies also...AA wasn't my thing, but YouTube videos were very helpful and this awesome group. You also referred in a previous post different things you enjoyed while drinking eg playing euchre etc but then in a further post that you can enjoy any activity without alcohol. So true!! I think we tend to get into a limited mindset when we attach drinking to previous activities we enjoyed...but as you stated, we can still enjoy them AF, perhaps even more cause we will have our full senses. B)

    Hope everyone has a happy, healthy AF week.
  • aroze0928aroze0928 Member Posts: 210 Member Member Posts: 210 Member
    JenT304 wrote: »
    Hi Everyone. Nothing alcohol related today. I wanted to share that my closest childhood friends' brother died this weekend from Covid. Please wear your masks and do the other things that science advises us to end this nightmare. We are all in this together.

    So sorry for thats news. My condolences to you and their family. ❤
  • Beka3695Beka3695 Member Posts: 3,336 Member Member Posts: 3,336 Member
    This is a convo with my husband today. 5:30 pm.... THIS helps me not want to drink.

    I’m having a super stressful day and started drinking thinkin.... now I’m nauseated at the thought.
    K: "how far are you driving"

    Me: what are you talking about

    K: I'm worried about you

    Me: why are you worried (thinking I drive 6 hrs home every other weekend or so)

    K: I don't want you drinking and driving

    Me: Kevin, I'm not drinking.... YOU are drinking.

    K: oh ok.
  • dbanks80dbanks80 Member Posts: 3,618 Member Member Posts: 3,618 Member
    JenT304 wrote: »
    Hi Everyone. Nothing alcohol related today. I wanted to share that my closest childhood friends' brother died this weekend from Covid. Please wear your masks and do the other things that science advises us to end this nightmare. We are all in this together.

    My condolences to the family! <3
  • FeelinFooFooFeelinFooFoo Member Posts: 4,320 Member Member Posts: 4,320 Member
    donimfp wrote: »
    @FeelingFooFoo, the constant pondering what to do is exhausting. I think we've all been there. Hoping you find your right path. I know you've read Annie Grace and maybe Allen Carr. If you haven't done so, you might check out Bex Weller, Sara(h?) Hepola, Lotta Dann . . . in other words the "quit lit" narratives. They can be quite inspiring and comforting in a way to read about people who have been there, done that, including struggling with the issue of whether or not to quit drinking.

    Thanks a lot. I should check out those books. They sound really interesting.

    And yep, it is quite exhausting. I guess it's a life changing decision.
  • FeelinFooFooFeelinFooFoo Member Posts: 4,320 Member Member Posts: 4,320 Member
    RubyRed427 wrote: »
    @FeelinFooFoo It takes time to work our way through our AF struggles. I have been on this journey for about 3 years now, and finally it is clicking. I have been having longer AF periods than ever. I think our brains are so used to relying on alcohol that we have to reprogram them. You're making progress month by month. :)

    Thanks for the encouragement. 😊👍
  • aroze0928aroze0928 Member Posts: 210 Member Member Posts: 210 Member
    Beka3695 wrote: »
    This is a convo with my husband today. 5:30 pm.... THIS helps me not want to drink.

    I’m having a super stressful day and started drinking thinkin.... now I’m nauseated at the thought.
    K: "how far are you driving"

    Me: what are you talking about

    K: I'm worried about you

    Me: why are you worried (thinking I drive 6 hrs home every other weekend or so)

    K: I don't want you drinking and driving

    Me: Kevin, I'm not drinking.... YOU are drinking.

    K: oh ok.

    Im sure he wishes you were home drinking with him. He'll turn it around eventually. If mine has theres hope. Speaking of mine hes down 8 pounds. Water weight im positive of that but he loses weight fast anyway. Another Af benefit
  • lorrainequiche59lorrainequiche59 Member Posts: 817 Member Member Posts: 817 Member
    @JenT304 <3

    @RubyRed427 I hear your struggle <3 Have you gone on YouTube and searched for a video that may help with your cravings. I remember when my bro died and I had 2 bottles of wine sitting on my kitchen counter, even rinsed out a fave wine glass, but decided to search for a video & ended up watching Dick Cavett interview Dick Van *kitten*. That was the end of my craving. I'm not suggesting that particular video for you, but you may find something that speaks to what you are going through right now. You are doing so well...the struggle means we are still fighting and the fight IS worth it...you'll get through this bout and it will make you stronger for the next one...eventually it will get fewer & farther between...You CAN do this!!
  • FeelinFooFooFeelinFooFoo Member Posts: 4,320 Member Member Posts: 4,320 Member
    OMG Bex Weller, Sexy Sobriety is speaking to me !! (She literally is, just watched a 50 min video 😂)

    I really needed to watch that video tonight (why chose sobriety over moderation)

    Thanks @donimfp for the suggestion.
  • RubyRed427RubyRed427 Member Posts: 2,694 Member Member Posts: 2,694 Member
    Trick to avoiding alcohol on a Friday night.... schedule a workout. I had my workout with my trainer this evening- it takes the edge off of the desire to drink AFTER the workout. I had a craving before, but it's gone now.
    @dbanks80 It is a depressant - you're right. Sounds like a good week, indeed.
    @FeelinFooFoo I'll have to check Bex Weller out!

    I have the following note in my note pad on my phone: I cant drink alcohol safely or responsibly.
    So when I go to write a note, I always see it pop up.
    @JenT304 Thanks for reminding me to add "responsibly". So true!
    @lorrainequiche59 I like your idea; you know how much I always love the Craig Ferguson video. Will revisit his clip later.
  • donimfpdonimfp Member Posts: 656 Member Member Posts: 656 Member
    @RubyRed427 I agree that not feeling deprived is a major goal. I have found that negative reasons for not drinking ("Reasons I Hated Drinking") do help me. But I'm working on developing more positive "Why I Love Being Sober" reasons. One of them is quite long-term. I plan to take my granddaughter to England's Lake District when she's 10. That's 4 years away. I especially look forward to returning to Beatrix Potter's house, the setting for many of the books we've enjoyed together. It will be a repeat of the 1986 trip I took with my then-6-year-old daughter (her mother). I look forward to being 4 years sober, super healthy and able to enjoy hiking and experiencing that beautiful area AND having no thoughts at all of how to handle alcohol during this trip with my favorite person on Earth.

    I've kept a daily journal since June 15, when I determined to really go sober. It worked for 5 days and then I drank daily again until July 6, the day the Sober School class began. I haven't had any alcohol since July 5. The journal helps because I've recorded all my thoughts and feelings and insights and cravings and frustrations and anger. When I do feel wobbly, it's nice to go back and read through the journal and get a feel for what the real me knows and believes down deep--that sobriety is my best path.

    @FeelinFooFoo glad you like Bex Weller. I think her "Happier Hour" was the first quit lit I read. Her Sexy Sobriety emails are always nice to receive.

    Have a wonderful weekend, everyone. I'm up late feeling a bit panicky. That's rare without alcohol, but not all problems disappear without it, of course, especially during this crazy year. We all deserve the "I got (or stayed) sober during 2020" t-shirt!
  • RubyRed427RubyRed427 Member Posts: 2,694 Member Member Posts: 2,694 Member
    @donimfp Positives: not having to think about moderating or counting drinks, worrying about a hangover ruining the weekend, being able to jump in the car and go anytime, morning coffee with no headache, sleeping so soundly, no racing heartbeat at night, .... all positives.

    Your future trip sounds perfect. I love Beatrix Potter's books, so sweet and pretty.
    I like your journal idea.
    Yes, I have to check out Bex today!
  • RubyRed427RubyRed427 Member Posts: 2,694 Member Member Posts: 2,694 Member
    When I read a post about someone thinking they need alcohol to help their anxiety, I feel like shouting "Alcohol is a huge reason you have anxiety"

    From Healthline:
    Alcohol changes levels of serotonin and other neurotransmitters in the brain, which can worsen anxiety. In fact, you may feel more anxious after the alcohol wears off. Alcohol-induced anxiety can last for several hours, or even for an entire day after drinking.
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