The Official MFP Love Match Thread for Totally Not Nude People

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Replies

  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    SwannySez wrote: »
    I'm in - who do you hate enough to match up with me?
    Disclaimer: You might want to name someone by whom you don't mind getting killed.

    I'm so poetic... surely nobody could resist. :D

    Looks like they haven't found a match for you yet..

    In actuality, @slimgirljo15 YOU are @midwesterner85’s match!

    Couple #7, folks?

    CAN YOU FEEL THE LOVE???

    Wonderful! Now I just need to figure out how to swim for a really long distance. :/

    Sending you a ticket✈ bayybeee 😉

    😲.......😭💔

    Dry those tears my little love muffin 😙 sending you one too.. 🤗💖
  • george5911
    george5911 Posts: 3,910 Member
    edited January 2019
    I'm curious...

    This is a thread full of answers


    Except when it isn't :ohwell:

    It's totally not.

    There's a love match made every 50 posts or so. Where else can you find that kind of volume? And about 50% of those are successful*, where else gives that kind of success rate while remaining disease free**?



    *success being purposely ill defined and assuredly a low bar.
    **disease free is relative. It's more like not more diseased. The participants have what they have, but the no nudity clause (mostly) assures not acquiring something additional.

    @kindalikevelma + @leut_underpants

    done, success rate increased

    This was not a reach, I've been foreplay tormenting her for weeks now and she looks fantastic in fancy clothes. Meanwhile she keeps promising me an array and beatings but never delivering. We're perfect. :heart:

    Tell her there's a production environment issue that needs attention. Tell her she can't leave until she finishes a RCA.

    Are you trying to win me from her? Cause that's how you win me. That and tight dresses, but I know you can do that.

    And here I could have been making backdoor security threats jokes with Leut this whole time. How was I so blind to this obvious storybook romance?
    I'm curious...

    This is a thread full of answers


    Except when it isn't :ohwell:

    It's totally not.

    There's a love match made every 50 posts or so. Where else can you find that kind of volume? And about 50% of those are successful*, where else gives that kind of success rate while remaining disease free**?



    *success being purposely ill defined and assuredly a low bar.
    **disease free is relative. It's more like not more diseased. The participants have what they have, but the no nudity clause (mostly) assures not acquiring something additional.

    @kindalikevelma + @leut_underpants

    done, success rate increased

    Trust me, I’ve tried. He keeps shooting me down and calling me kid. He’s an ageist, that one.

    The dichotomy here is spellbinding, I love it. I don't know whether I'm turned on or offended. :laugh:

    FWIW, I was recompiling kernels and writing bsd firewalls when you were still in your pull ups.

    The more you reveal your age, the harder I fall. You stop it.

    Keep going this is recovering my #brand and success rate
    neilwij wrote: »
    Here goes😁

    I'm quiet, shy but a bit of a dark horse. I've got a pretty good sense of humour but no one on here knows yet. I love to motivate people on here and I always work my A##e off when I'm training. I'm sure I'd be quite a catch for somebody 😂 So I'm just throwing myself out into the unknown...

    I award you @RomaineCalm

    She's a little wilted these days, but she becomes more palatable if you dowse her in the right dressing.

    Sorry to rain on the love match parade here but I'm contaminated, not wilted, and therefore I'm not so palatable no matter what dressing is used.

    https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=iv68VBBUgFE&feature=share
  • taco_inspector
    taco_inspector Posts: 7,223 Member
    edited January 2019
    I would like someone who can entertain me til mfp fixes the glitch...so this is foreverville baybee!

    ... maybe if I weren't so old.


    Could you tolerate someone like @Tankiscool better?

  • Nicksmom106
    Nicksmom106 Posts: 1,624 Member
    SwannySez wrote: »
    I'm in - who do you hate enough to match up with me?
    Disclaimer: You might want to name someone by whom you don't mind getting killed.

    I'm so poetic... surely nobody could resist. :D

    Looks like they haven't found a match for you yet..

    In actuality, @slimgirljo15 YOU are @midwesterner85’s match!

    Couple #7, folks?

    CAN YOU FEEL THE LOVE???

    Wonderful! Now I just need to figure out how to swim for a really long distance. :/

    Sending you a ticket✈ bayybeee 😉

    😲.......😭💔

    Dry those tears my little love muffin 😙 sending you one too.. 🤗💖

    Yesssssss!😍 I'm good!!!!😁....thanks Catholic parents for teaching me the art of guilting😅
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    I would like someone who can entertain me til mfp fixes the glitch...so this is foreverville baybee!

    ... maybe if I weren't so old.


    Could you tolerate someone like @Tankiscool better?

    She can have someone else. I claim you.
  • Nicksmom106
    Nicksmom106 Posts: 1,624 Member
    tinak33 wrote: »
    I would like someone who can entertain me til mfp fixes the glitch...so this is foreverville baybee!

    ... maybe if I weren't so old.


    Could you tolerate someone like @Tankiscool better?

    She can have someone else. I claim you.

    Hey hey hey....no one said I didn't want him😡.....sharsies?🤷😍👍

    And for.the record sir...I am old as dirt....😉
  • SwannySez
    SwannySez Posts: 5,860 Member
    Yeesh, I leave and suddenly MFP has tiny life once more.


    Okay @SwannySez I'm ready for love. Do your worst.

    I prefer my match to be a capable companion at well-dressed events, to be terminally teased and never progress from a state of constant, torturous, gleeful mental foreplay. In short, we will be a romantic comedy - everyone fulfilled and happy, but without any sex, because the story is about love and those things are mutually exclusive.

    Who do you have for me?

    My worst? Oh ye of little faith!

    This has taken a lot of thought but I believe that this will make both of you better:

    @leut_underpants your match is @alywei3773. To have and to hold from this day forth. In cyber and in life. On MFP and not.

    I pronounce you an MFP Love Match!
  • Unknown
    edited January 2019
    This content has been removed.
  • taco_inspector
    taco_inspector Posts: 7,223 Member
    tinak33 wrote: »
    I would like someone who can entertain me til mfp fixes the glitch...so this is foreverville baybee!

    ... maybe if I weren't so old.


    Could you tolerate someone like @Tankiscool better?

    She can have someone else. I claim you.

    ...
    And for.the record sir...I am old as dirt....😉

    Dirty can be nice ...
    ... and familiar
  • Nicksmom106
    Nicksmom106 Posts: 1,624 Member
    SwannySez wrote: »
    Yeesh, I leave and suddenly MFP has tiny life once more.


    Okay @SwannySez I'm ready for love. Do your worst.

    I prefer my match to be a capable companion at well-dressed events, to be terminally teased and never progress from a state of constant, torturous, gleeful mental foreplay. In short, we will be a romantic comedy - everyone fulfilled and happy, but without any sex, because the story is about love and those things are mutually exclusive.

    Who do you have for me?

    My worst? Oh ye of little faith!

    This has taken a lot of thought but I believe that this will make both of you better:

    @leut_underpants your match is @alywei3773. To have and to hold from this day forth. In cyber and in life. On MFP and not.

    I pronounce you an MFP Love Match!

    Wait, wut?

    @kindalikevelma what do we do here? There's an impending packet collision on my network.

    giphy.gif
  • RomaineCalm
    RomaineCalm Posts: 3,972 Member
    neilwij wrote: »
    Here goes😁

    I'm quiet, shy but a bit of a dark horse. I've got a pretty good sense of humour but no one on here knows yet. I love to motivate people on here and I always work my A##e off when I'm training. I'm sure I'd be quite a catch for somebody 😂 So I'm just throwing myself out into the unknown...

    I award you @RomaineCalm

    She's a little wilted these days, but she becomes more palatable if you dowse her in the right dressing.

    Sorry to rain on the love match parade here but I'm contaminated, not wilted, and therefore I'm not so palatable no matter what dressing is used.

    Does that mean I have the herp?

    :|
    Yo, this is how rumors get started.
  • Tankiscool
    Tankiscool Posts: 11,105 Member
    I would like someone who can entertain me til mfp fixes the glitch...so this is foreverville baybee!

    ... maybe if I weren't so old.


    Could you tolerate someone like @Tankiscool better?

    I am into moms.....waiiiit what???
  • SwannySez
    SwannySez Posts: 5,860 Member
    Tankiscool wrote: »
    I would like someone who can entertain me til mfp fixes the glitch...so this is foreverville baybee!

    ... maybe if I weren't so old.


    Could you tolerate someone like @Tankiscool better?

    I am into moms.....waiiiit what???

    Ah! A MILFman! We can accommodate that!
  • neilwij
    neilwij Posts: 1,634 Member
    neilwij wrote: »
    Here goes😁

    I'm quiet, shy but a bit of a dark horse. I've got a pretty good sense of humour but no one on here knows yet. I love to motivate people on here and I always work my A##e off when I'm training. I'm sure I'd be quite a catch for somebody 😂 So I'm just throwing myself out into the unknown...

    I award you @RomaineCalm

    She's a little wilted these days, but she becomes more palatable if you dowse her in the right dressing.

    Sorry to rain on the love match parade here but I'm contaminated, not wilted, and therefore I'm not so palatable no matter what dressing is used.

    There's far worse things than e coli*, right @neilwij ? Tell the lovely lass what she's earned.




    *basalmic vinegrette, for one :sick:

    @RomaineCalm I'm sure your not contaminated. I'm sure a splash of the right something can bring any dish back to life
  • Nicksmom106
    Nicksmom106 Posts: 1,624 Member
    Tankiscool wrote: »
    I would like someone who can entertain me til mfp fixes the glitch...so this is foreverville baybee!

    ... maybe if I weren't so old.


    Could you tolerate someone like @Tankiscool better?

    I am into moms.....waiiiit what???

    but....I could've been your Mrs. Robinson😟
  • neilwij
    neilwij Posts: 1,634 Member
    @RomaineCalm I apologise that was really bad 😂😂
  • This content has been removed.
  • nooshi713
    nooshi713 Posts: 4,877 Member
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    SwannySez wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    SwannySez wrote: »
    Match #6 y’all!

    @standenvernet and @nooshi713 are a match made in heaven! Here in this earth we will just squint at the power of this love match!

    What is he like?

    Heaven in a male body. He is the kindest, warmest, bravest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life,

    Well that is wonderful. He sounds great.

    Yeah, something like that -- I got the 6-foot thing covered (with some to spare); Let's break this down from your Shopping list:
    • 6 feet tall (yup)
    • Fine (I feel fine, but ... unless you're talking about hair ... you'll need to be the judge...)
    • Affectionate (when properly motivated / reciprocated)
    • Gentleman (yup, that's the room I use; alternately labeled as "Mens"...)
    • Likes to travel and likes the outdoors (yup, though I do live indoors, which intentionally keeps the "outdoors" outdoors)
    • Likes short women (stature = yes; sighted = no; tempered = no -- you will be teased on this, however)
    • Gives a good massage (of course, often with various 'endings' )

    So, @george5911 sounds pretty good about now, eh?

    Hi. How old are you? Do you like birds? What about women's feet?

    55, and both are fantastic when properly prepared.
    How'd I do?

    Great. But youre a bit too old for me.

    Age is but a number

    Well it would look weird. I'm 36 but look 10 years younger. Hes 20 years older.
  • SwannySez
    SwannySez Posts: 5,860 Member
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    SwannySez wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    SwannySez wrote: »
    Match #6 y’all!

    @standenvernet and @nooshi713 are a match made in heaven! Here in this earth we will just squint at the power of this love match!

    What is he like?

    Heaven in a male body. He is the kindest, warmest, bravest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life,

    Well that is wonderful. He sounds great.

    Yeah, something like that -- I got the 6-foot thing covered (with some to spare); Let's break this down from your Shopping list:
    • 6 feet tall (yup)
    • Fine (I feel fine, but ... unless you're talking about hair ... you'll need to be the judge...)
    • Affectionate (when properly motivated / reciprocated)
    • Gentleman (yup, that's the room I use; alternately labeled as "Mens"...)
    • Likes to travel and likes the outdoors (yup, though I do live indoors, which intentionally keeps the "outdoors" outdoors)
    • Likes short women (stature = yes; sighted = no; tempered = no -- you will be teased on this, however)
    • Gives a good massage (of course, often with various 'endings' )

    So, @george5911 sounds pretty good about now, eh?

    Hi. How old are you? Do you like birds? What about women's feet?

    55, and both are fantastic when properly prepared.
    How'd I do?

    Great. But youre a bit too old for me.

    Age is but a number

    I like you more and more.
  • This content has been removed.
  • Nicksmom106
    Nicksmom106 Posts: 1,624 Member
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    SwannySez wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    SwannySez wrote: »
    Match #6 y’all!

    @standenvernet and @nooshi713 are a match made in heaven! Here in this earth we will just squint at the power of this love match!

    What is he like?

    Heaven in a male body. He is the kindest, warmest, bravest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life,

    Well that is wonderful. He sounds great.

    Yeah, something like that -- I got the 6-foot thing covered (with some to spare); Let's break this down from your Shopping list:
    • 6 feet tall (yup)
    • Fine (I feel fine, but ... unless you're talking about hair ... you'll need to be the judge...)
    • Affectionate (when properly motivated / reciprocated)
    • Gentleman (yup, that's the room I use; alternately labeled as "Mens"...)
    • Likes to travel and likes the outdoors (yup, though I do live indoors, which intentionally keeps the "outdoors" outdoors)
    • Likes short women (stature = yes; sighted = no; tempered = no -- you will be teased on this, however)
    • Gives a good massage (of course, often with various 'endings' )

    So, @george5911 sounds pretty good about now, eh?

    Hi. How old are you? Do you like birds? What about women's feet?

    55, and both are fantastic when properly prepared.
    How'd I do?

    Great. But youre a bit too old for me.

    Age is but a number

    Well it would look weird. I'm 36 but look 10 years younger. Hes 20 years older.

    🤔sometimes us oldies look younger...I believe the new iPhone has the 20 yrs younger filter😀....this could still work!!!!😉😍

    (Personally in thought his liking birds if they are prepared well was gonna be the big no no!🤷😬😉)
  • nooshi713
    nooshi713 Posts: 4,877 Member
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    SwannySez wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    SwannySez wrote: »
    Match #6 y’all!

    @standenvernet and @nooshi713 are a match made in heaven! Here in this earth we will just squint at the power of this love match!

    What is he like?

    Heaven in a male body. He is the kindest, warmest, bravest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life,

    Well that is wonderful. He sounds great.

    Yeah, something like that -- I got the 6-foot thing covered (with some to spare); Let's break this down from your Shopping list:
    • 6 feet tall (yup)
    • Fine (I feel fine, but ... unless you're talking about hair ... you'll need to be the judge...)
    • Affectionate (when properly motivated / reciprocated)
    • Gentleman (yup, that's the room I use; alternately labeled as "Mens"...)
    • Likes to travel and likes the outdoors (yup, though I do live indoors, which intentionally keeps the "outdoors" outdoors)
    • Likes short women (stature = yes; sighted = no; tempered = no -- you will be teased on this, however)
    • Gives a good massage (of course, often with various 'endings' )

    So, @george5911 sounds pretty good about now, eh?

    Hi. How old are you? Do you like birds? What about women's feet?

    55, and both are fantastic when properly prepared.
    How'd I do?

    Great. But youre a bit too old for me.

    Age is but a number

    Well it would look weird. I'm 36 but look 10 years younger. Hes 20 years older.

    🤔sometimes us oldies look younger...I believe the new iPhone has the 20 yrs younger filter😀....this could still work!!!!😉😍

    (Personally in thought his liking birds if they are prepared well was gonna be the big no no!🤷😬😉)

    Well I cant blame him for liking chicken or turkey. I dont want anyone trying to eat my feather babies though!
  • Nicksmom106
    Nicksmom106 Posts: 1,624 Member
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    SwannySez wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    SwannySez wrote: »
    Match #6 y’all!

    @standenvernet and @nooshi713 are a match made in heaven! Here in this earth we will just squint at the power of this love match!

    What is he like?

    Heaven in a male body. He is the kindest, warmest, bravest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life,

    Well that is wonderful. He sounds great.

    Yeah, something like that -- I got the 6-foot thing covered (with some to spare); Let's break this down from your Shopping list:
    • 6 feet tall (yup)
    • Fine (I feel fine, but ... unless you're talking about hair ... you'll need to be the judge...)
    • Affectionate (when properly motivated / reciprocated)
    • Gentleman (yup, that's the room I use; alternately labeled as "Mens"...)
    • Likes to travel and likes the outdoors (yup, though I do live indoors, which intentionally keeps the "outdoors" outdoors)
    • Likes short women (stature = yes; sighted = no; tempered = no -- you will be teased on this, however)
    • Gives a good massage (of course, often with various 'endings' )

    So, @george5911 sounds pretty good about now, eh?

    Hi. How old are you? Do you like birds? What about women's feet?

    55, and both are fantastic when properly prepared.
    How'd I do?

    Great. But youre a bit too old for me.

    Age is but a number

    Well it would look weird. I'm 36 but look 10 years younger. Hes 20 years older.

    🤔sometimes us oldies look younger...I believe the new iPhone has the 20 yrs younger filter😀....this could still work!!!!😉😍

    (Personally in thought his liking birds if they are prepared well was gonna be the big no no!🤷😬😉)

    Well I cant blame him for liking chicken or turkey. I dont want anyone trying to eat my feather babies though!

    Sorry pal! You're stuck with me!🤷😉
  • Tankiscool
    Tankiscool Posts: 11,105 Member
    SwannySez wrote: »
    Tankiscool wrote: »
    I would like someone who can entertain me til mfp fixes the glitch...so this is foreverville baybee!

    ... maybe if I weren't so old.


    Could you tolerate someone like @Tankiscool better?

    I am into moms.....waiiiit what???

    Ah! A MILFman! We can accommodate that!

    I mean......who isnt?
  • T1DCarnivoreRunner
    T1DCarnivoreRunner Posts: 11,502 Member
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    SwannySez wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    SwannySez wrote: »
    Match #6 y’all!

    @standenvernet and @nooshi713 are a match made in heaven! Here in this earth we will just squint at the power of this love match!

    What is he like?

    Heaven in a male body. He is the kindest, warmest, bravest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life,

    Well that is wonderful. He sounds great.

    Yeah, something like that -- I got the 6-foot thing covered (with some to spare); Let's break this down from your Shopping list:
    • 6 feet tall (yup)
    • Fine (I feel fine, but ... unless you're talking about hair ... you'll need to be the judge...)
    • Affectionate (when properly motivated / reciprocated)
    • Gentleman (yup, that's the room I use; alternately labeled as "Mens"...)
    • Likes to travel and likes the outdoors (yup, though I do live indoors, which intentionally keeps the "outdoors" outdoors)
    • Likes short women (stature = yes; sighted = no; tempered = no -- you will be teased on this, however)
    • Gives a good massage (of course, often with various 'endings' )

    So, @george5911 sounds pretty good about now, eh?

    Hi. How old are you? Do you like birds? What about women's feet?

    55, and both are fantastic when properly prepared.
    How'd I do?

    Great. But youre a bit too old for me.

    Age is but a number

    Well it would look weird. I'm 36 but look 10 years younger. Hes 20 years older.

    🤔sometimes us oldies look younger...I believe the new iPhone has the 20 yrs younger filter😀....this could still work!!!!😉😍

    (Personally in thought his liking birds if they are prepared well was gonna be the big no no!🤷😬😉)

    Well I cant blame him for liking chicken or turkey. I dont want anyone trying to eat my feather babies though!

    Did you say something about a feather, baby?
  • nooshi713
    nooshi713 Posts: 4,877 Member

    I understand, you have no idea how often I hear this around the local playgrounds

    ........

  • nooshi713
    nooshi713 Posts: 4,877 Member
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    SwannySez wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    SwannySez wrote: »
    Match #6 y’all!

    @standenvernet and @nooshi713 are a match made in heaven! Here in this earth we will just squint at the power of this love match!

    What is he like?

    Heaven in a male body. He is the kindest, warmest, bravest, most wonderful human being I've ever known in my life,

    Well that is wonderful. He sounds great.

    Yeah, something like that -- I got the 6-foot thing covered (with some to spare); Let's break this down from your Shopping list:
    • 6 feet tall (yup)
    • Fine (I feel fine, but ... unless you're talking about hair ... you'll need to be the judge...)
    • Affectionate (when properly motivated / reciprocated)
    • Gentleman (yup, that's the room I use; alternately labeled as "Mens"...)
    • Likes to travel and likes the outdoors (yup, though I do live indoors, which intentionally keeps the "outdoors" outdoors)
    • Likes short women (stature = yes; sighted = no; tempered = no -- you will be teased on this, however)
    • Gives a good massage (of course, often with various 'endings' )

    So, @george5911 sounds pretty good about now, eh?

    Hi. How old are you? Do you like birds? What about women's feet?

    55, and both are fantastic when properly prepared.
    How'd I do?

    Great. But youre a bit too old for me.

    Age is but a number

    Well it would look weird. I'm 36 but look 10 years younger. Hes 20 years older.

    🤔sometimes us oldies look younger...I believe the new iPhone has the 20 yrs younger filter😀....this could still work!!!!😉😍

    (Personally in thought his liking birds if they are prepared well was gonna be the big no no!🤷😬😉)

    Well I cant blame him for liking chicken or turkey. I dont want anyone trying to eat my feather babies though!

    Did you say something about a feather, baby?

    The little fluffers.

    My 4 parrots.
  • Nicksmom106
    Nicksmom106 Posts: 1,624 Member
    tinak33 wrote: »
    I would like someone who can entertain me til mfp fixes the glitch...so this is foreverville baybee!

    ... maybe if I weren't so old.


    Could you tolerate someone like @Tankiscool better?

    She can have someone else. I claim you.

    ...
    And for.the record sir...I am old as dirt....😉

    Dirty can be nice ...
    ... and familiar

    Come to momma!🤗....but go slow...you don't wanna break anything good before you make it over here😬😉😍