Things people say when you lose weight
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hallobailey wrote: »Weight loss is a very personal journey but it inevitably draws comments from the people around us. I’m curious, what kind of comments have you received related to your weight loss? Good, bad, frustrating. Here are a couple for me...
Good: “You are looking fit”
Frustrating: “you don’t have any weight to lose” or “don’t get obsessed with your new diet”hallobailey wrote: »Weight loss is a very personal journey but it inevitably draws comments from the people around us. I’m curious, what kind of comments have you received related to your weight loss? Good, bad, frustrating. Here are a couple for me...
Good: “You are looking fit”
Frustrating: “you don’t have any weight to lose” or “don’t get obsessed with your new diet”
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I have lost 10 lbs so far and have only received a couple of comments, “Have you lost weight?”.
I don’t think my weight loss is super noticeable yet as I tend to wear loose clothing and I am still carrying the weight in my face. Hopefully once I lose 10 more Lbs it will be a bit more noticeable and I can get a few more comments.7 -
I’ve had a couple of people notice my modest weight loss (17 pounds) and their comments have been welcome and not at all offensive to me. One person said “you’ve lost weight, haven’t you?” When I said yes, she said “was it intentional?” When I said yes, she said “good for you.” Another said “I can tell you’ve dropped a few pounds and you look great.” Others have not mentioned my weight loss but have just said something along the lines of “you look great.”7
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“You’re already small. What’s your goal?”
“You track EVERYTHING? That’s a lot of work.”
“You’re very dedicated.”8 -
My (now Ex) husband when he looked at the scale one morning when I was weighing in: Boy, you're a lot heavier than you look
![:\](https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/resources/emoji/confused.png ":\")
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Apparently, I glow when I lose weight.10
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99% positive response and that I was an inspiration to them. When I told one person that I had dropped over 60 lbs so far, they acted like they didn't believe me. Or another just said, I see it in your face the most. That is until I showed them my before and after shirtless photo. Then they could see what I was hiding under all those baggy clothes.7
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was told you are 1/2 the size you were. I lost 30 lbs but it shows a lot when you are short, 5'3 and a half!10
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corinasue1143 wrote: »
WOW! kinda reminds me of my brother saying to me when I was obese.."I thought you said you would never get fat?! " in his usual condescending voice in front of a group of people. He's a jerk like that.14 -
"You look slimmer"0
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One friend: You girls need to help me lose my last 20lbs.
Another friend: You and your sister need to eat some potatoes, rice ... You're wasting away.
Me: Shrugs. Aiming to hit a decent % above lbm.5 -
The good :
- "Hey, you look nice(/er)!"
- "Are you working out?"
- Asking diet or exercise tips.
- You look too skinny! (While I was still overweight)
- You should stop now, you're gonna look sick!
- You look good now, you should stop working out so often!
- That cookie isn't gonna kill you, eat!
The best part about the whole journey is probably when you inspire your friends/family to change as well!16 -
I got told by a coworker to "Eat a cheeseburger" the other day.
That's a new one. I'm not even close to underweight or anything.10 -
My wife and I have been working really hard. She's not only losing, but getting pretty ripped. Visited the inlaws last week and my mil tells her she looks good, but now her boobs are too small. And we wonder where these insecurities come from.27
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Sorry if this comes across as overly-judgemental, but you shouldn't be starving yourself! It is hard work to be vigilant, but starvation ain't healthy.
[/soapbox]
I don't know if this was meant as a reply to me... I agree it's not healthy to starve yourself, which is why I said that people's comments can be toxic. We shouldn't congratulate the symptoms without caring to understand the cause.4 -
Sorry if this comes across as overly-judgemental, but you shouldn't be starving yourself! It is hard work to be vigilant, but starvation ain't healthy.
[/soapbox]
I don't know if this was meant as a reply to me... I agree it's not healthy to starve yourself, which is why I said that people's comments can be toxic. We shouldn't congratulate the symptoms without caring to understand the cause.
Yeah, I think my post a month ago was a response to you commenting on getting positive reinforcement when you were starving yourself. We both agree that starvation ain't healthy, so that's good. Don't do it. Then maybe you can feel like the positive comments are just that -- positive for your healthy lifestyle choices and the results that come from them.
I do hope you weren't offended by my reply. Maybe I misunderstood what you wrote. From what I ready, you were getting positive reinforcement for an unhealthy behavior. I suggested to stop the unhealthy behavior. I'll stand by that. I think people, me included, have a weakness that we feel people are judging us, and maybe they are thinking we're doing something wrong. In reality, people aren't thinking about us much at all -- if we knew how LITTLE people thought of us, we'd be happier. I'll still offer up that for those of us on a weight management and fitness journey can do ourselves a favor and consider that many comments we get are from a positive space, even if the person making the comment isn't very good at it.
Please accept my apologies if my words were taken in a way they were not intended. And may you have success in your journey!10 -
RelCanonical wrote: »MrsBradyBunch wrote: »I get called an "inspiration" sometimes. I'm glad for that.
Some people act envious. One remark was a grumbled, "I think I'm finding the weight you're losing."
And then there is the teasing. "Your clothes are getting loose on you. Did they stretch out, or something?" I suppose it's similar to the joke about somebody getting their "ears lowered" rather than their hair cut, but it kind of ticks me off.
That's hilarious! I would have told them, "Now it's your turn to chuck it to someone else. Hot potato." 20/20 hindsight and all that.
Great one. Wish I'd thought of that.3 -
New one from my in-laws, who recently visited from two states away. Last time they were here was in November, for our wedding vow renewal. I'd had to make a new dress for the occasion, because my dress from 10 years ago was now too big for me. That's good news in itself. Well, hubby and I have both lost even more weight since November. As my in-laws were ending this most recent visit, FIL turned to me and said, "Next time we come, we expect to see even less of you."
He meant it well. It was a jokey way of saying, "Good job."16 -
I have a friend who I've known for over 15 years. We very rarely get to see each other but we had a few hours this week when he was local to where I was.
He knows I've been working hard, every time we speak I seem to have just got out of the pool, and he said something which honestly makes me want to cry every time I think of it.
Very sincerely and looking me right in the eye, he said "I have faith in you."
It means the world when someone believes in you like that.31 -
This week I've run into two old friends for the first time since maybe 2015-2016 (I hit my goal in 2014) and both of them made the same comment - basically "Whoa, you look great...I can't believe you've kept the weight off". Both are guys and I know they were not trying to be rude, so I took it as a compliment instead of being offended by their choice of comments.14
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Friends not commenting at all when I have lost weight, and when I was heavier those same friends had a lot of negative comments about my weight.22
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ItsyBitsy246 wrote: »Nothing. Not a peep, good or bad after losing 35-40 pounds. I'm pretty sure there was a noticeable difference between my weight of 185 and my weight of 145!
well im sure you look awesome!
ive never really had anyone make comment either, from 103lbs to 224lbs then back down to now 146ish whatever though haha, i know i look different!
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I recognise a lot of these comments - particularly the ones about “ooh, don’t get too thin” (I am currently right at the top of “normal weight” BMI within a whisper of “overweight” - I’ll start worrying about “being too thin” when my trousers are falling down, NOT while I can’t pull them up and over my thighs!!)
However, I also recognise some of these comments because I have SAID some of them before. 😬. What SHOULD people say? I know I might get comments advising that I say nothing at all, but people often like their efforts to be noticed. The catch-all “you look great” works, right?17 -
I visit different offices within my company every 2 or 3 months. In a meeting last week a lady that I see a little more often because she travels too said, "I can tell you've been working hard, you look great." She didn't ask how much weight, (like my hairdresser did last week) or anything about diet, just that she could tell I'd been working on it and that I looked great. I wanted to hug her. I was training a small class and it could have taken over the conversation. It was perfect. They're not all rude, I think most people don't know what to say and think they're being nice or projecting their own issues on you.14
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I visit different offices within my company every 2 or 3 months. In a meeting last week a lady that I see a little more often because she travels too said, "I can tell you've been working hard, you look great." She didn't ask how much weight, (like my hairdresser did last week) or anything about diet, just that she could tell I'd been working on it and that I looked great. I wanted to hug her. I was training a small class and it could have taken over the conversation. It was perfect. They're not all rude, I think most people don't know what to say and think they're being nice or projecting their own issues on you.
That's a really great way to put it. It leaves a much better impact to compliment someone's effort rather than just the result.15 -
ItsyBitsy246 wrote: »Nothing. Not a peep, good or bad after losing 35-40 pounds. I'm pretty sure there was a noticeable difference between my weight of 185 and my weight of 145!
I haven't gotten any feedback either. I just notice a lot more staring when I got out. One guy who I didn't recognize at the grocery store said it was good to see me and that I looked younger. I took the compliment, even though it was probably meant for somebody else. lol6 -
I've gotten two comments about "holy cow, you don't need to lose 30 more" from my coworker and my parents (who are the only people I talk about my weight loss with). Fortunately, both were very open and reasonable when I explained to them that it would put me in the middle of a healthy bmi, and that I just seem quite thin now because they are used to seeing me as overweight (as I have been overweight pretty much all my life). I also explained that I can seem especially thin because my skin will be looser, leading to a more frail appearance at first, but that it fades with continued maintenance. After that, they both seemed much more comfortable with my goal.29
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GrizzledSquirrel wrote: »I recognise a lot of these comments - particularly the ones about “ooh, don’t get too thin” (I am currently right at the top of “normal weight” BMI within a whisper of “overweight” - I’ll start worrying about “being too thin” when my trousers are falling down, NOT while I can’t pull them up and over my thighs!!)
However, I also recognise some of these comments because I have SAID some of them before. 😬. What SHOULD people say? I know I might get comments advising that I say nothing at all, but people often like their efforts to be noticed. The catch-all “you look great” works, right?
Yes, “you look great” always works. This is what Ihave heard most often, and it’s nice to have my hard work acknowledged.
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