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Dad Jokes/Bad Jokes...

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  • s131951s131951 Member Posts: 3,721 Member Member Posts: 3,721 Member
    Me: 'That bird nearly flew into us."
    Dad: ' It was a crows encounter of the bird kind.'
  • tinuztinuz Member Posts: 1,117 Member Member Posts: 1,117 Member
    my wife told me "don't get upset if someone calles you fat"

    "you're much bigger then that"
  • ColetteM6ColetteM6 Member Posts: 138 Member Member Posts: 138 Member
    Did you hear about that circus fire?...
    It was in tents.
  • hannahland18hannahland18 Member Posts: 10 Member Member Posts: 10 Member
    A Proton walks into a bar.
    He ask the bar tender “how much for a drink?”

    The bar tender replies “for you, no charge” 😉
  • tinuztinuz Member Posts: 1,117 Member Member Posts: 1,117 Member
    My wife caught me cross dressing and told me it was over.

    So i packed up all of her clothes and left
    edited December 2019
  • drmwcdrmwc Member, Premium Posts: 502 Member Member, Premium Posts: 502 Member
    ^ took me a while to get that one.

    I went to the zoo recently. It was rubbish - it only had one animal, a small dog.

    It was a Shih Tzu.
    edited December 2019
  • FeelinFooFooFeelinFooFoo Member Posts: 4,326 Member Member Posts: 4,326 Member
    Why did the chicken cross the road ?


    For a foul reason.....
  • FeelinFooFooFeelinFooFoo Member Posts: 4,326 Member Member Posts: 4,326 Member
    Why did humpdy dumpdy sit in the corner?

    Because he had a square ar$e.
    edited December 2019
  • FeelinFooFooFeelinFooFoo Member Posts: 4,326 Member Member Posts: 4,326 Member
    Where is pink panther from?

    Dunoon, dunoon, dunoon dunoon dunoon
  • FeelinFooFooFeelinFooFoo Member Posts: 4,326 Member Member Posts: 4,326 Member
    Why do giraffes have long necks ?

    Because their farts stink
  • honeybee__12honeybee__12 Member, Premium Posts: 13,211 Member Member, Premium Posts: 13,211 Member
    What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on him?


    Nothing,
    he just let out a little w(h)ine.
  • honeybee__12honeybee__12 Member, Premium Posts: 13,211 Member Member, Premium Posts: 13,211 Member
  • tinuztinuz Member Posts: 1,117 Member Member Posts: 1,117 Member
    where are all the "dad Jokes" stored......

    A dadabase
  • tinuztinuz Member Posts: 1,117 Member Member Posts: 1,117 Member
    i read a long article about japenese sword fighters.....

    ....if you want i can samurais it for you??
  • EddieJohnHuntEddieJohnHunt Member Posts: 695 Member Member Posts: 695 Member
    I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together. Riveting!
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