Online dating

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Replies

  • _Miss_chievous_
    _Miss_chievous_ Posts: 2,765 Member
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  • nooshi713
    nooshi713 Posts: 4,842 Member
    1sphere wrote: »
    LyndaBSS wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    1sphere wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    1sphere wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    1sphere wrote: »
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    1sphere wrote: »
    just_Tomek wrote: »
    Because of this thread I just signed on on tinder.
    I did too. I got 3 or 4 matches after a month. Results were a failure as anticipated.

    here's the trend:
    1. Girl replies hi
    2. Girl feels a (likely) instant sense of fear and distrust
    3. Girl decides it is best not to communicate any further and the approach is ghosting

    I'm thinking that if you're under 35 whereabouts - girls see Tinder as some kind of game, and guys take the thing for serious


    Absolutely untrue.
    You cannot say what’s untrue since you are not a man, and you don’t know what it’s like on the male side of using the apps.

    Do I have to screenshot it for you?

    You saying men are serious is directly opposite of my experience though. More women than men tend to want to actually date or find a relationship. More guys tend to look for casual flings. This is generally true. Doesn’t mean there aren’t exceptions.
    A lot of women sign up with expectations such as finding a long term relationship, they also set their standards extremely high, and in a way this makes them out to be not taking it for real with unrealistic standards (ie. not practically giving anyone a chance). The end result is that they’re just there to lurk and seek attention. I’m not saying this is you, you’re probably realistic and mature... but this seems to be most people, you can even see it in the profile descriptions that they seek the ideal fairytale; stamping down the words “prince perfect” and “long term”. It ends up making you think that they’re crazy.

    Long term does not suggest crazy. The fact that you think so makes me think you’re the crazy one.
    Desiring a long term relationship is absolutely fine, and healthy of course. But explicitly stating that you want a long term instantly is nuts. Don’t you think that it makes more sense to seek short term relationships initially to see if there’s a good chemistry? And then eventually build it into a long term in *reality*?

    Saying one wants something long term doesn’t mean they expect it instantly. You’re doing an awful lot of assuming. Anything before a relationship is just dating.

    This ^^^^

    I would absolutely put long term relationship as my reason for being on the site, if that’s what I wanted.

    You’d be amazed how that would be a deterrent for guys who aren’t there for the same reason. Weeds out the losers. 🥰
    It's important to remember that guys don't think exactly the same way that women do. Stating "long term" puts pressure on you to be the perfect man, it makes us run 100 miles even though we may also desire a long term relationship. I talked to guys about this before.

    Where do you get your information?..... Ladies, this young man is on his own. He does not speak for my gender.

    Thank God.
  • KosmosKitten
    KosmosKitten Posts: 10,476 Member
    I have no horse in this race.

    I can only input that if I met my husband and most of the most AMAZING people I've ever met online (not on dating sites or apps, mind you), there is hope for anyone. Trust me.

    My question to those of you using these websites and apps: Have you ever considered just kicking back, taking it easy and getting to know people online outside of a site built for dating/hookups? You know, building a relationship/friendship with someone and then seeing what happens?

    Just a thought.
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 270,430 Member
    PaperDoll_ wrote: »
    I met my lovely wife @eatpolerepeat here on MFP. 😘

    I also met my side piece @Minion_training_program here on MFP.

    I’m sorry some of you are having so much trouble with online dating. I found it very easy. I just saw the ones I wanted and declared them mine. 😁

    :laugh: this is why I ❤ ya
  • eatpolerepeat
    eatpolerepeat Posts: 27,130 Member
    PaperDoll_ wrote: »
    I met my lovely wife @eatpolerepeat here on MFP. 😘

    I also met my side piece @Minion_training_program here on MFP.

    I’m sorry some of you are having so much trouble with online dating. I found it very easy. I just saw the ones I wanted and declared them mine. 😁

    Yes, we have mfp to thank. ❤ you @PaperDoll_ 😘
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 33,029 Member
    PaperDoll_ wrote: »
    I met my lovely wife @eatpolerepeat here on MFP. 😘

    I also met my side piece @Minion_training_program here on MFP.

    I’m sorry some of you are having so much trouble with online dating. I found it very easy. I just saw the ones I wanted and declared them mine. 😁

    :laugh: this is why I ❤ ya

    See kids? I got a wife, a side piece, and yet the ladies keep throwing themselves at me.

    Might I suggest changing your dating profile pics to that of a sloth? Bonus if it has its own stuffed animal. 😁
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 270,430 Member
    PaperDoll_ wrote: »
    PaperDoll_ wrote: »
    I met my lovely wife @eatpolerepeat here on MFP. 😘

    I also met my side piece @Minion_training_program here on MFP.

    I’m sorry some of you are having so much trouble with online dating. I found it very easy. I just saw the ones I wanted and declared them mine. 😁

    :laugh: this is why I ❤ ya

    See kids? I got a wife, a side piece, and yet the ladies keep throwing themselves at me.

    Might I suggest changing your dating profile pics to that of a sloth? Bonus if it has its own stuffed animal. 😁

    Pmsl 😂🤣 you crazy girl
  • Coffeeandchat
    Coffeeandchat Posts: 17 Member
    I find it difficult to text without seeing there facial expressions and body language. I’m new here
  • Coffeeandchat
    Coffeeandchat Posts: 17 Member
    So what’s the site. I’m 45 and not going right
  • km8907
    km8907 Posts: 3,862 Member
    AyeRon18 wrote: »
    I don't know why anyone would feel pressured to be the perfect man. It's a two way street, spend time with someone and if you both like each other you do it again till it either works or doesn't work. ONS must be a young guy thing, I'm in my 30's now and would rather find someone i can do fun *kitten* with.

    You'd think. A guy I spent way too long talking to before asking what he was looking for said he was just there for hookups. He was 36. I ask sooner now.
  • nooshi713
    nooshi713 Posts: 4,842 Member
    edited November 2019
    I have no horse in this race.

    I can only input that if I met my husband and most of the most AMAZING people I've ever met online (not on dating sites or apps, mind you), there is hope for anyone. Trust me.

    My question to those of you using these websites and apps: Have you ever considered just kicking back, taking it easy and getting to know people online outside of a site built for dating/hookups? You know, building a relationship/friendship with someone and then seeing what happens?

    Just a thought.

    Of course I have considered it. I don’t know about others. But, dating is different now. Men rarely approach women in public. I won’t date a man from work and all my friends are married.

    Im a very active person and have hobbies and things, but If I just waited and hoped some guy would randomly ask me out, I might be waiting years.

  • KosmosKitten
    KosmosKitten Posts: 10,476 Member
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    I have no horse in this race.

    I can only input that if I met my husband and most of the most AMAZING people I've ever met online (not on dating sites or apps, mind you), there is hope for anyone. Trust me.

    My question to those of you using these websites and apps: Have you ever considered just kicking back, taking it easy and getting to know people online outside of a site built for dating/hookups? You know, building a relationship/friendship with someone and then seeing what happens?

    Just a thought.

    Of course I have considered it. I don’t know about others. But, dating is different now. Men rarely approach women in public. I won’t date a man from work and all my friends are married.

    Im a very active person and have hobbies and things, but If I just waited and hoped some guy would randomly ask me out, I might be waiting years.

    SO didn't approach me online, I approached and pursued him. We had a long term friendship (despite my obvious crush) for close to a decade before he turned around one day and asked to meet up with and eventually pursue a relationship.

    And we originally became acquainted through a gaming/comics website (no longer around, sadly). Kinda just followed one another around online for years to keep in touch and reconnected when able. I don't think I ever thought about just "waiting around" for a dude to ask me out.. because yeesh, I'd be dead probably.

    Also, I think despite the bravado a lot of guys have, many of them are quite nervous/anxious about asking a woman they like for their number or more information for fear of being accused of assault/harassment/etc. We live in strange times.
  • nooshi713
    nooshi713 Posts: 4,842 Member
    nooshi713 wrote: »
    I have no horse in this race.

    I can only input that if I met my husband and most of the most AMAZING people I've ever met online (not on dating sites or apps, mind you), there is hope for anyone. Trust me.

    My question to those of you using these websites and apps: Have you ever considered just kicking back, taking it easy and getting to know people online outside of a site built for dating/hookups? You know, building a relationship/friendship with someone and then seeing what happens?

    Just a thought.

    Of course I have considered it. I don’t know about others. But, dating is different now. Men rarely approach women in public. I won’t date a man from work and all my friends are married.

    Im a very active person and have hobbies and things, but If I just waited and hoped some guy would randomly ask me out, I might be waiting years.

    SO didn't approach me online, I approached and pursued him. We had a long term friendship (despite my obvious crush) for close to a decade before he turned around one day and asked to meet up with and eventually pursue a relationship.

    And we originally became acquainted through a gaming/comics website (no longer around, sadly). Kinda just followed one another around online for years to keep in touch and reconnected when able. I don't think I ever thought about just "waiting around" for a dude to ask me out.. because yeesh, I'd be dead probably.

    Also, I think despite the bravado a lot of guys have, many of them are quite nervous/anxious about asking a woman they like for their number or more information for fear of being accused of assault/harassment/etc. We live in strange times.

    I’m glad it worked out for you. I do know people who met their SO or husband at work or something. Most of my friends who are now married met their SO online.

    I don’t approach men and tbh the types of men who usually approach me are the player type. No thanks. Also, I don’t have years to wait and build a friendship first.

  • Coffeeandchat
    Coffeeandchat Posts: 17 Member
    Having so much trouble trying to put my words into text. At 45 raising my little one. I just wanna have coffee and chat.