Online dating
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just_Tomek wrote: »Because of this thread I just signed on on tinder.
here's the trend:
1. Girl replies hi
2. Girl feels a (likely) instant sense of fear and distrust
3. Girl decides it is best not to communicate any further and the approach is ghosting
I'm thinking that if you're under 35 whereabouts - girls see Tinder as some kind of game, and guys take the thing for serious
Absolutely untrue.
Do I have to screenshot it for you?
You saying men are serious is directly opposite of my experience though. More women than men tend to want to actually date or find a relationship. More guys tend to look for casual flings. This is generally true. Doesn’t mean there aren’t exceptions.
Long term does not suggest crazy. The fact that you think so makes me think you’re the crazy one.
Saying one wants something long term doesn’t mean they expect it instantly. You’re doing an awful lot of assuming. Anything before a relationship is just dating.
It makes you seem overly serious, and it also spells out that you want to make a family with "long term".
It puts too much of a requirement on someone who doesn't even know much about you, and who also can't even be sure to be entirely what you want. Even though you both might desire that long term commitment.
Just saying, it's probably good to leave it out on the profile or it will scare guys away.
And I understand that you don't want those one-night-stand guys, but it's better to study them, rather than carve in stone what you're looking for. Do as you will, though. Our opinions can differ and that's fine.just_Tomek wrote: »Because of this thread I just signed on on tinder.
here's the trend:
1. Girl replies hi
2. Girl feels a (likely) instant sense of fear and distrust
3. Girl decides it is best not to communicate any further and the approach is ghosting
I'm thinking that if you're under 35 whereabouts - girls see Tinder as some kind of game, and guys take the thing for serious
Absolutely untrue.
Do I have to screenshot it for you?
You saying men are serious is directly opposite of my experience though. More women than men tend to want to actually date or find a relationship. More guys tend to look for casual flings. This is generally true. Doesn’t mean there aren’t exceptions.
Long term does not suggest crazy. The fact that you think so makes me think you’re the crazy one.
Saying one wants something long term doesn’t mean they expect it instantly. You’re doing an awful lot of assuming. Anything before a relationship is just dating.
This ^^^^
I would absolutely put long term relationship as my reason for being on the site, if that’s what I wanted.
You’d be amazed how that would be a deterrent for guys who aren’t there for the same reason. Weeds out the losers. 🥰
I feel it is important to be honest. If it puts some guys off, then fine. I’m 37 years old and have no time to waste on guys looking for a casual fling.
It doesn’t mean I’m trying to marry every man I meet. I’m not overly serious. People who know me IRL will realize this.
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Deadman_Diggingup wrote: »just_Tomek wrote: »Because of this thread I just signed on on tinder.
here's the trend:
1. Girl replies hi
2. Girl feels a (likely) instant sense of fear and distrust
3. Girl decides it is best not to communicate any further and the approach is ghosting
I'm thinking that if you're under 35 whereabouts - girls see Tinder as some kind of game, and guys take the thing for serious
Absolutely untrue.
Do I have to screenshot it for you?
You saying men are serious is directly opposite of my experience though. More women than men tend to want to actually date or find a relationship. More guys tend to look for casual flings. This is generally true. Doesn’t mean there aren’t exceptions.
Long term does not suggest crazy. The fact that you think so makes me think you’re the crazy one.
Saying one wants something long term doesn’t mean they expect it instantly. You’re doing an awful lot of assuming. Anything before a relationship is just dating.
This ^^^^
I would absolutely put long term relationship as my reason for being on the site, if that’s what I wanted.
You’d be amazed how that would be a deterrent for guys who aren’t there for the same reason. Weeds out the losers. 🥰
Where do you get your information?..... Ladies, this young man is on his own. He does not speak for my gender.
Thank God.
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I have no horse in this race.
I can only input that if I met my husband and most of the most AMAZING people I've ever met online (not on dating sites or apps, mind you), there is hope for anyone. Trust me.
My question to those of you using these websites and apps: Have you ever considered just kicking back, taking it easy and getting to know people online outside of a site built for dating/hookups? You know, building a relationship/friendship with someone and then seeing what happens?
Just a thought.3 -
Deadman_Diggingup wrote: »just_Tomek wrote: »Because of this thread I just signed on on tinder.
here's the trend:
1. Girl replies hi
2. Girl feels a (likely) instant sense of fear and distrust
3. Girl decides it is best not to communicate any further and the approach is ghosting
I'm thinking that if you're under 35 whereabouts - girls see Tinder as some kind of game, and guys take the thing for serious
Absolutely untrue.
Do I have to screenshot it for you?
You saying men are serious is directly opposite of my experience though. More women than men tend to want to actually date or find a relationship. More guys tend to look for casual flings. This is generally true. Doesn’t mean there aren’t exceptions.
Long term does not suggest crazy. The fact that you think so makes me think you’re the crazy one.
Saying one wants something long term doesn’t mean they expect it instantly. You’re doing an awful lot of assuming. Anything before a relationship is just dating.
This ^^^^
I would absolutely put long term relationship as my reason for being on the site, if that’s what I wanted.
You’d be amazed how that would be a deterrent for guys who aren’t there for the same reason. Weeds out the losers. 🥰
Where do you get your information?..... Ladies, this young man is on his own. He does not speak for my gender.
Thank God.
Anyway nooshi I respect your view.
In other news, I’m about to go full Joker on you guys. But not only on you guys, in real life as well. I will not forfeit my truths about anything, ever! And I don’t simply assume stuff, I don’t find comfort in making up stuff.
For the record... I don't think you have any haters like you said in one of your previous post. People may not agree with some things you said and vice versa. Doesn't mean a war needs to start. You put your opinion out there, others are going to have some too. 😊6 -
I met my lovely wife @eatpolerepeat here on MFP. 😘
I also met my side piece @Minion_training_program here on MFP.
I’m sorry some of you are having so much trouble with online dating. I found it very easy. I just saw the ones I wanted and declared them mine. 😁5 -
PaperDoll_ wrote: »I met my lovely wife @eatpolerepeat here on MFP. 😘
I also met my side piece @Minion_training_program here on MFP.
I’m sorry some of you are having so much trouble with online dating. I found it very easy. I just saw the ones I wanted and declared them mine. 😁
:laugh: this is why I ❤ ya4 -
slimgirljo15 wrote: »PaperDoll_ wrote: »I met my lovely wife @eatpolerepeat here on MFP. 😘
I also met my side piece @Minion_training_program here on MFP.
I’m sorry some of you are having so much trouble with online dating. I found it very easy. I just saw the ones I wanted and declared them mine. 😁
:laugh: this is why I ❤ ya
See kids? I got a wife, a side piece, and yet the ladies keep throwing themselves at me.
Might I suggest changing your dating profile pics to that of a sloth? Bonus if it has its own stuffed animal. 😁4 -
PaperDoll_ wrote: »slimgirljo15 wrote: »PaperDoll_ wrote: »I met my lovely wife @eatpolerepeat here on MFP. 😘
I also met my side piece @Minion_training_program here on MFP.
I’m sorry some of you are having so much trouble with online dating. I found it very easy. I just saw the ones I wanted and declared them mine. 😁
:laugh: this is why I ❤ ya
See kids? I got a wife, a side piece, and yet the ladies keep throwing themselves at me.
Might I suggest changing your dating profile pics to that of a sloth? Bonus if it has its own stuffed animal. 😁
Pmsl 😂🤣 you crazy girl2 -
I find it difficult to text without seeing there facial expressions and body language. I’m new here1
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So what’s the site. I’m 45 and not going right0
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I don't know why anyone would feel pressured to be the perfect man. It's a two way street, spend time with someone and if you both like each other you do it again till it either works or doesn't work. ONS must be a young guy thing, I'm in my 30's now and would rather find someone i can do fun *kitten* with.
You'd think. A guy I spent way too long talking to before asking what he was looking for said he was just there for hookups. He was 36. I ask sooner now.2 -
CanesGalactica wrote: »I have no horse in this race.
I can only input that if I met my husband and most of the most AMAZING people I've ever met online (not on dating sites or apps, mind you), there is hope for anyone. Trust me.
My question to those of you using these websites and apps: Have you ever considered just kicking back, taking it easy and getting to know people online outside of a site built for dating/hookups? You know, building a relationship/friendship with someone and then seeing what happens?
Just a thought.
Of course I have considered it. I don’t know about others. But, dating is different now. Men rarely approach women in public. I won’t date a man from work and all my friends are married.
Im a very active person and have hobbies and things, but If I just waited and hoped some guy would randomly ask me out, I might be waiting years.
4 -
CanesGalactica wrote: »I have no horse in this race.
I can only input that if I met my husband and most of the most AMAZING people I've ever met online (not on dating sites or apps, mind you), there is hope for anyone. Trust me.
My question to those of you using these websites and apps: Have you ever considered just kicking back, taking it easy and getting to know people online outside of a site built for dating/hookups? You know, building a relationship/friendship with someone and then seeing what happens?
Just a thought.
Of course I have considered it. I don’t know about others. But, dating is different now. Men rarely approach women in public. I won’t date a man from work and all my friends are married.
Im a very active person and have hobbies and things, but If I just waited and hoped some guy would randomly ask me out, I might be waiting years.
SO didn't approach me online, I approached and pursued him. We had a long term friendship (despite my obvious crush) for close to a decade before he turned around one day and asked to meet up with and eventually pursue a relationship.
And we originally became acquainted through a gaming/comics website (no longer around, sadly). Kinda just followed one another around online for years to keep in touch and reconnected when able. I don't think I ever thought about just "waiting around" for a dude to ask me out.. because yeesh, I'd be dead probably.
Also, I think despite the bravado a lot of guys have, many of them are quite nervous/anxious about asking a woman they like for their number or more information for fear of being accused of assault/harassment/etc. We live in strange times.2 -
CanesGalactica wrote: »CanesGalactica wrote: »I have no horse in this race.
I can only input that if I met my husband and most of the most AMAZING people I've ever met online (not on dating sites or apps, mind you), there is hope for anyone. Trust me.
My question to those of you using these websites and apps: Have you ever considered just kicking back, taking it easy and getting to know people online outside of a site built for dating/hookups? You know, building a relationship/friendship with someone and then seeing what happens?
Just a thought.
Of course I have considered it. I don’t know about others. But, dating is different now. Men rarely approach women in public. I won’t date a man from work and all my friends are married.
Im a very active person and have hobbies and things, but If I just waited and hoped some guy would randomly ask me out, I might be waiting years.
SO didn't approach me online, I approached and pursued him. We had a long term friendship (despite my obvious crush) for close to a decade before he turned around one day and asked to meet up with and eventually pursue a relationship.
And we originally became acquainted through a gaming/comics website (no longer around, sadly). Kinda just followed one another around online for years to keep in touch and reconnected when able. I don't think I ever thought about just "waiting around" for a dude to ask me out.. because yeesh, I'd be dead probably.
Also, I think despite the bravado a lot of guys have, many of them are quite nervous/anxious about asking a woman they like for their number or more information for fear of being accused of assault/harassment/etc. We live in strange times.
I’m glad it worked out for you. I do know people who met their SO or husband at work or something. Most of my friends who are now married met their SO online.
I don’t approach men and tbh the types of men who usually approach me are the player type. No thanks. Also, I don’t have years to wait and build a friendship first.
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Having so much trouble trying to put my words into text. At 45 raising my little one. I just wanna have coffee and chat.3
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CanesGalactica wrote: »CanesGalactica wrote: »I have no horse in this race.
I can only input that if I met my husband and most of the most AMAZING people I've ever met online (not on dating sites or apps, mind you), there is hope for anyone. Trust me.
My question to those of you using these websites and apps: Have you ever considered just kicking back, taking it easy and getting to know people online outside of a site built for dating/hookups? You know, building a relationship/friendship with someone and then seeing what happens?
Just a thought.
Of course I have considered it. I don’t know about others. But, dating is different now. Men rarely approach women in public. I won’t date a man from work and all my friends are married.
Im a very active person and have hobbies and things, but If I just waited and hoped some guy would randomly ask me out, I might be waiting years.
SO didn't approach me online, I approached and pursued him. We had a long term friendship (despite my obvious crush) for close to a decade before he turned around one day and asked to meet up with and eventually pursue a relationship.
And we originally became acquainted through a gaming/comics website (no longer around, sadly). Kinda just followed one another around online for years to keep in touch and reconnected when able. I don't think I ever thought about just "waiting around" for a dude to ask me out.. because yeesh, I'd be dead probably.
Also, I think despite the bravado a lot of guys have, many of them are quite nervous/anxious about asking a woman they like for their number or more information for fear of being accused of assault/harassment/etc. We live in strange times.
I’m glad it worked out for you. I do know people who met their SO or husband at work or something. Most of my friends who are now married met their SO online.
I don’t approach men and tbh the types of men who usually approach me are the player type. No thanks. Also, I don’t have years to wait and build a friendship first.
Well, maybe not a friendship (unless that's what you mutually want with a person), but taking time to really get to know whether the person is worth your time and energy on a site not strictly intended for dating. I feel like you would encounter less player/desperate types outside of a dating/hookup site than you would on one since the culture on those sites kinda fosters that type of attitude from a large percentage of its users.
Also, for those of you who utilize Tinder... can you please explain to me why there is a weird obsession with butt stuff on that app? What about "I want a meaningful connection with someone" or "I want to get some coffee sometime" screams "I love butt sex!"??
I don't get it.2 -
I’m definitely not into butt stuff. Just coffee and adult conversation that’s all.4
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