WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR FEBRUARY 2020

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Replies

  • auntiebk
    auntiebk Posts: 2,607 Member
    edited February 2020
    "Todo"s and "done"
    Done: BB&B, farmers’ market, dog group.
    Bonus: ½ mi stroll with friend but without step counter, Tumble to MiniPetMart for food
    ToDo: Shadow to vet for Heartworm test, Chiro, bake something for Joe for Vday, invest 10 mins cleaning Dining Room, carry over 10 mins cleaning Guest Bth, Living Room, Master Bth, GuestBth, schedule DEXA scan with CHN, get M$oft login fixed, install iCloud for Win 10, Freddie’s for complete series TDAP <$48, bake bran muffins, call Carolyn D. Next week Shadow to Mini Pet Mart to shop for crate, get Shingrix vaccine. Reward: inventory seeds, plan garden, order replenishments.
    Another day slackin’ on the cleaning, so of course now it’s overwhelming. Invited friend to Hot Tub Monday, gives me 4 days to catch up. All this lovely weather makes me want to be outside pruning instead of inside vacuuming. [sigh]

    Heather trust by April, Hove’s coronavirus issue will have long been resolved. Had to google RIB trip fjord to see what kind of vessel, will definitely watch this space  Like others I enjoy traveling vicariously through you.
    Rebecca never thought of bringing my own protein to pizza place with salad bar. Brilliant! And your steak looks almost as yummy as Athena Rose.
    Luci “They walk like their royal feet were never meant to touch cold white stuff.” Reminds me of two dogs I had before meeting Joe. When I took them to Yosemite in winter, Jocko leapt for joy as if snow were created expressly for him. Terri snapped and tried to bite it before it landed on her… she was NOT amused. ;)
    Barbie, glad you got some wanted-but-not-longed for time at home with no pestering. Remembering your friend who wished for clean linens every day makes me reluctant to long for anything.
    Ginny yes I remember sponge painting and didn’t like it even when it was in fashion.
    Amber what a successful day, but best was the Grandpa finding Pooh and turning him in. :heart:
    Welcome Diane from snowy Michigan. Those goals are great strategies!
    Tracey it’s light a little longer here too, wish it were lighter earlier. Come Spring!
    Machka they all worked for me except fushia. Perhaps with an Americanized spelling? fuschia. Nope. Wonder if magenta will work?

    Sleepy so grabbing a couple zzz s before taking Shadow in for :heart: :worm: test. Thanks Samand, will crank the music up this afternoon to get me CLEANING. ;)


    Lighter, lovelies!
    f8qt1s098sxm.gifBarbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD
    February: better than January.
    daily: steps=8140 + ½ mi uncounted  vits=10.5 log=12 CI<CO=10 CI<250<CO=8 Tumble 5/10=8 mfp=12 outside=8 clean 10 mins=7 up hill=12
    wkly: BB&B x3=5, rx=2 dance=3 pack walk=2
    mnthly: board mtg= grant= review 20for20=1
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 17,211 Member
    stat for the day-

    1st long run since i fell with the bike that day. hip is ok now, still didn't go full speed, but steady enuf for over 5 mi.

    Treadmill - jog, 1hr, 136ahr, 154mhr, 5.1-7.0sp, 10.34min, mi, 5.68mi= 569c
    apple watch= 624c
  • Katla49
    Katla49 Posts: 10,385 Member
    Luci in WNC: Thank you for the good wishes. This has been a long and horrible experience for DDIL’s mom and the whole family. :cry:

    (((Allie)))

    Barbie: I’m glad you got a bit of time to yourself. :heart:

    Ginny: We have satellite TV and rarely have trouble with signal. We live in an area where everyone has either satellite or cable because we can’t get local TV broadcasts from Portland due to topography. :ohwell:

    Diane from MI: Welcome to a great group! :smiley:

    Heather: I hope your dental check up goes well. :smiley:

    Karen: The cake is fabulous! We should have had that for the Rose Bowl! Yellow and green are Oregon Duck colors. :bigsmile:


    A plumber is here right now and in the process of replacing our kitchen faucet set. It has been a long wait. Our last set lasted for 20 years, but it had plastic parts that failed. This set is all metal and we won’t need to worry about plastic fatigue. YAY!!!!!

    Katla in Beautiful NW Oregon
  • klanders30
    klanders30 Posts: 2,569 Member
    Flea I am overwhelmed just thinking about all that you must go through with the house. Sending peace and strength to you and DH.

    NYKAREN
  • kymarai
    kymarai Posts: 3,702 Member
    Hugs!
  • JRsLateInLifeMom
    JRsLateInLifeMom Posts: 2,275 Member
    423cal parfait
    d345i1kscb1m.jpeg
    Has 🍯 honey on low fat Dannon yogurt, granola 2 types toffe almond y leftover chocolate strawberry one, 6 strawberries 🍓, 15 butterscotch chips 1 Godiva block of dark chocolate. Yummy

    Next low cal meals to freeze or refrigerator until ready to eat or microwave

    Amber Tx
  • 1948Peachy
    1948Peachy Posts: 1,511 Member
    Flea ~ I think in the State of GA, they would only entail the house...not the furniture or autos.
  • cityjaneLondon
    cityjaneLondon Posts: 12,678 Member
    edited February 2020
    So sorry Flea. All unneeded stress. :# Those kinds of messes are awful. Can you get some advice so you definitely know where you stand? My instinct is always to just get it all done and over as soon as possible so I'm not dwelling on it. I always want to take my losses and run. Otherwise it can keep eating away at you. I lost out on a big inheritance from my godmother and if I allow myself to think about it I can still get angry. The past is the past now. I could have gone to court against the b.....d, but I didn't. My life is good, so I've let it go, but it still rankles from time to time.

    Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx
  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,412 Member
    1948Peachy wrote: »
    Flea ~ My mom was on Medicaid in a nursing home. My brothers had her put her house in the name of my sister and I over 5 yrs before she had to have this assistance. In the end, we were able to keep the house. I know a lot of folks will think that was not an honest thing for them to have done, but, that's how it ended up.

    Carol in GA

    You followed the rules. It wasn't dishonest. It was smart.
  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,412 Member
    Flea so sorry
  • evie1958
    evie1958 Posts: 863 Member
    Flea, so sorry about the house and the financial mess.
    Allie, you really do need to leave that sinking ship, FAST!
    Rebecca, just when I think Athena can't get any cuter, there she is again! Cuter than ever!
    Kelly, love the photo of Miguel and Joaquin!
    I know I'm missing on other specific grands, they are all so cute! Loving the photos of all of them!
    Have been in a funk and couldn't figure out why til this morning. Saturday, Feb 15 will be the anniversary of my mom's passing. It's been 9 years and I've accepted it, just not quite used to it yet, I guess. Still think of her and my dear friend who passed 16 years ago in March when I see or do things that only they would understand the significance of.
    With that in mind, I have logged my breakfast. Didn't get to the gym this morning and won't after work either, just too late in the day, but I will make sure that I get everything ready for tomorrow morning and I will go. I will also do more to stop the grazing my way thru the kitchen after dinner!
    Hugs for those who need them, congrats to those celebrating and welcome to the newbies!
    Evelyn, Vancouver Island where it's raining, again. Sigh. (at least it's a gentle rain, not like the downpours of the last few weeks!)
  • LisaInAR
    LisaInAR Posts: 2,020 Member
    So . . . in case anyone out there ends up on medicaid or you have someone on medicaid, it took a little over two weeks after my mil's death for the state to put a lien on her estate/trust. We have been curious about the amount, and basically, it is well over the actual value of the house. The tax assessment is $50,000 more than that, but the house is in such horrible shape -- that assessment is probably what it would be worth if it were in prime condition.

    I don't know if they expect us to sell furniture and her car to try to make up the difference? She has a very nice Ethan Allen bedroom set that is promised to a niece. I don't know if she is going to be able to have it now. We also bought IKEA furniture for her to use in the assisted living place. But it's in the house now. Is that considered an asset? This is not going to be pretty.

    So hubby is upset. The dollar amount is much more than he was expecting, but it is actually less than I was expecting. I don't know what happens next.

    The really, really bad thing about this is that two of my husband's sons left their apartment and moved into the house, thinking we would have time for them to build up some cash reserves, get a loan, and buy it. But I don't think that is going to happen. So not only will they lose the house, but we have all lost the money we put into it trying to make it habitable for the boys.

    I will say "I told you so" here and to my mother, but not to anyone else. Over a year ago, when we started cleaning it out so the boys could move in, I argued against it. I told my husband we needed to clean it out, then all gather at the house, thank it for the service it provided to his mother, and walk away. He couldn't do it. I understand why -- he never really accepted the fact that they were going to take all of the assets until just last week. Last night, he was in denial again -- "We can negotiate." "It's immoral." <sigh>

    It's not immoral. And I'm fairly certain they will not negotiate. Medicaid has already negotiated with providers on cost, so I don't think there's any more room for that, but we will see.

    I am just sick about the boys. We will help get them set up again, but literally, they moved into the house two weeks before she died, so they've been there six weeks. :cry:

    Flea
    Willamette Valley, Oregon

    Flea, there's some really interesting information in this article, and there is a hardship clause which might keep them from grabbing the house, but the family would have to fight for it. Much depends on Oregon law.

    As to how much is owed, they just say, "There is a limit on how much can be recovered by the state. States cannot recover more than the total amount spent by Medicaid on the individual’s behalf at or after age 55. Also, states may not recover more than the amount remaining in the estate after claims of other creditors are fully satisfied. The order of payment by which creditors are paid is set forth in state law."

  • JRsLateInLifeMom
    JRsLateInLifeMom Posts: 2,275 Member
    edited February 2020
    Yes!! Successfully filled all 10 containers of food leaves 5 for hubby 5 for me. 1 1/2 days worth of meals each.2 Days of snacks! All at 1255 cal total after my protein shakes added! wvmh0pgsn4tn.jpeg

    Woohoo 🙌
    Been needing these! Portion controlled helps hubby y me .Only have to worry about JR he has pizza cheese he’s fine lol.

    Amber Tx

    1 meal: BBQ Platter 350 or 370cal range
    Ghughes BBQ sauce bottom of chicken
    Chicken baked
    Onion 1/8 in black beans with Parmesan seasoning,pepper, garlic powder y on side y dill pickle 3 each under chicken
    Broccoli Normandy
    Corn with pepper

    2 meal : plain chicken meal 250cal
    Chicken baked
    Broccoli Normandy
    Green bean with onion y pepper
    Carrot sticks y raw onion slices

    The yogurt listed above
    Amber Tx
  • OregonMother
    OregonMother Posts: 1,661 Member
    edited February 2020
    LisaInAR wrote: »
    Flea, there's some really interesting information in this article, and there is a hardship clause which might keep them from grabbing the house, but the family would have to fight for it. Much depends on Oregon law.

    As to how much is owed, they just say, "There is a limit on how much can be recovered by the state. States cannot recover more than the total amount spent by Medicaid on the individual’s behalf at or after age 55. Also, states may not recover more than the amount remaining in the estate after claims of other creditors are fully satisfied. The order of payment by which creditors are paid is set forth in state law."

    Thank you, Lisa. She lived in Utah, and they are the most aggressive on the continuum of recovery. Our letter said that we need to notify "all heirs," so I think they will come after everything, not just the real property.

    Also, the amount they gave us, I assume, is the amount spent on her since she was 55. One of the things I will ask for is an accounting of what was spent, not just a dollar amount.

    We don't qualify under the hardship clause.

    Carol in GA -- I think that is what my husband was hoping to create with the trust -- assuming, at the time he set it up, that she would live another five years. The problem, which neither one of us knew (and apparently the attorney who set up the trust didn't know or didn't reveal), is that she has been on medicaid probably since she was 55 (she has never worked), so in order to protect the house, she would have needed to get it out of her name well earlier than that. (Her mother bought her the house over 30 years ago so that she would have someplace to live. This makes it even more complicated, because even though the house was in my mil's name, my husband's cousin -- the one who wants the bedroom furniture -- considers it a "family asset." My husband doesn't even want to talk to her at this point, because she is going to blow a gasket. He had been trying to warn her this would happen, but she would hear nothing of it. She refused to believe that the state would take a "family asset.") (ETA: Her mother should have put the house in a trust from the beginning, now that I think of it.)

    Utah does not put a lien on the home when the person goes into full-time care because they aggressively recover all expenses, so even if she hadn't gone into full-time care and had lived all of her time in the house, they would have put a lien against the estate for anything they had spent on her since she was 55. They wait until after the person has died to do it. My mil knew this would happen, and has tried to tell my husband for years. She agreed to it every year when she renewed her medicaid.

    I really don't have a problem with them recovering what they've spent -- in order to have enough for people who will need it next, they need to replenish the pot. Taxpayers shouldn't have to cover the bill.

    I just don't know how this is supposed to happen -- if they are really expecting to take everything. Do they want us to have a garage sale? Will they have someone walk through the house, assess values, and then send us a bill?

    That is an option -- they actually included an address for us to send them a check. :lol:

    I am just sick that the boys gave up their apartment, as horrible as the land lord was. There is no way for them not to be harmed by this, even if my husband and I give them first/last months rent to get them into a place. Their monthly rent is going up.

    I think my husband is leaning toward getting a mortgage on the house to cover the lien, and having the boys live in the house -- kind of as planned. But I don't think the house is in any shape to even qualify for a conventional loan. And I don't believe the boys would qualify, so that leaves us on the hook, and I don't know that it's worth all of that.

    Oh dear.

    Flea
    Willamette Valley, Oregon



  • 1948Peachy
    1948Peachy Posts: 1,511 Member
    (((Flea)))
  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,412 Member
    Flea Are you going to have your house assessed by an independent assessor? I believe I would do that.

    >>>
    evie1958 wrote: »
    Have been in a funk and couldn't figure out why til this morning. Saturday, Feb 15 will be the anniversary of my mom's passing. It's been 9 years and I've accepted it, just not quite used to it yet, I guess. Still think of her and my dear friend who passed 16 years ago in March when I see or do things that only they would understand the significance of.

    Evelyn, Vancouver Island where it's raining, again. Sigh. (at least it's a gentle rain, not like the downpours of the last few weeks!)
    __

    Evelyn, I understand this so well…March marks the passing of Dad, my sister Dana, and Mom, in 1981, 2000, and 2001. Some years it sneaks up on me.
    I'm so sorry you lost your mother and your dear friend. What were they like?

    >>>

    Karen in Virginia who had a lovely Lilliana day.

  • margaretturk
    margaretturk Posts: 5,246 Member
    :heart:
  • GodMomKim
    GodMomKim Posts: 3,703 Member
    B)
  • OregonMother
    OregonMother Posts: 1,661 Member
    Flea Are you going to have your house assessed by an independent assessor? I believe I would do that.

    I will recommend it. Thanks for the suggestion.

    Flea
    Willamette Valley, Oregon
  • TerriRichardson112
    TerriRichardson112 Posts: 18,964 Member
    ☘️
  • Snowflake1968
    Snowflake1968 Posts: 6,939 Member
    Flea - Hugs to you it sounds like a true mess.

    Carol - I don’t think that’s cheating, I think it’s smart. Here in Canada we don’t have to worry about those things as much, but my Grandmother signed everything over to my brother and mother years before she passed so the government couldn’t get anything. She even changed her bank account to their names

    Debby - I wouldn’t be able to have the pre packaged meals in my house either, I don’t even care for leftovers. My husband was like yours for years but since I finally got him to a doctor who told him to lose weight he is taking it very seriously.

    Well the week is almost done! Tomorrow is a special lunch for the residents and we as staff are allowed to purchase is we choose. It is pasta and salad. I don’t know if I’ll partake or not.

    I have taken a lunch all week so far and been eating homemade meals at night until tonight when hubby wanted burgers. This is only the 2nd time since December when he used to want them 2 or 3 nights a week. I agreed so I didn’t have to cook. Way over on calories now.

    Tracey in Edmonton
    Where it was light driving to work and home tonight!