Wrong answers ONLY!

nossmf

You can blame Garfield. (The cat, not the President.) He was one of the original social media icons.

(Thank you, @Generic_Excuse, but I realize upon re-reading my question that I actually asked the wrong question. My lament was supposed to be less about why aren't they working, and more about how I exercise, play games and take selfies, but aren't making absurd amounts of money, so must be doing something wrong. But not only could I not edit my post, but your answer makes me not want to ask my true question.)

Why is it you only realize the perfect question or retort hours AFTER the conversation is over?

FabulousFantasticFifty

Because your mind is sometimes overprotective and doesn't want you to look like too much of a Smartiepants in front of people. It reserves the glory of saying " "Dang... I'm a genius sometimes" when you're all by yourself to bask in the glory of it all so you can pat yourself on the back!

Why is it so dang hard to just fall asleep like normal people? 😫

Generic_Excuse

nossmf wrote: »

(Thank you, @Generic_Excuse, but I realize upon re-reading my question that I actually asked the wrong question. My lament was supposed to be less about why aren't they working, and more about how I exercise, play games and take selfies, but aren't making absurd amounts of money, so must be doing something wrong. But not only could I not edit my post, but your answer makes me not want to ask my true question.)

@nossmf Either you're welcome for answering your question and helping with your realization or I apologize for ruining your dream. 🤣

FabulousFantasticFifty wrote: »

Why is it so dang hard to just fall asleep like normal people? 😫

First off, what is normal really? Its less that we just fall asleep but that our battery packs run out. Kinda like a phone battery the older it gets the less charge it will hold onto and the quicker it dies. This just means your battery pack is extremely taken care off, you should be proud of yourself!

cmsienk

@Generic_Excuse, it's your turn for a question. Perhaps you'd like to know what happened to that spider in my shower. (Alas poor Yorick!) Or just how many varieties of chocolate there are. Or, who among us, has written a book and what it was about. 😉

Generic_Excuse

😲 Oh duh, I forgot the most important part to keep the game going! Although I do wonder who among us wrote a book and about what I might jump into the question thread for that!


Why is it right before holidays or big/important events I always get sick?

nossmf

People have gatherings of friends and family around holidays and important events. Is it really so surprising that germs and viruses follow the same pattern? Throughout the year your body plays host to a certain number of germs, but come holiday time they send out invites to all the other germs they know (and considering there are trillions of the little suckers out there, that's quite a few) and ask them to come have a celebration in their house, aka your body. You get sick because they need to ramp up their environment with decorative lights, music, extra cookie baking, all of which takes power, which means you feel run down. Sneezing comes from when all the birthday germs blow out their birthday cake candles simultaneously. Fevers come from...well, some questions are best not to ask.

When my wife and daughter wanted to add dogs to our family, I was the one who argued against the idea the longest. Now, the dogs seem to like me the most. Why is that?

Generic_Excuse

This happens with my husband as well. I think the more he ignores the dog the more the dog pines for his attention believing my husband is playing "hard to get". It's very embarrassing to watch. Although one could argue you may be sending mixed signals. Do you pet the pup, or play with it, give treats out, etc? Because then I think you are leading the poor thing on.😂

You know when you're driving and you start to think about something and then all of a sudden your at your destination but you can't remember getting there. Why don't we remember? (If this doesn't happen to y'all then... me either)

FabulousFantasticFifty

Might you be afflicted by sleep driving? That might be kina dangerous ...no?

This housing market has gotten ridiculous lately and I've seen local properties sell for triple their values from just two years ago. The same applies to the rental market here. I heard that the average Denver home runs about a Million, Doesn't that kill the "American" dream of Homeownership? I sure don't know any millionaires, do you?
How on earth can the average person in the workplace avoid homelessness when they don't even make enough to cover rent?

nossmf

FabulousFantasticFifty wrote: »

Might you be afflicted by sleep driving? That might be kina dangerous ...no?

Considering how often I've had to go to extremes to stay awake while driving home after a graveyard shift, this isn't quite as amusing an answer as you may think...

How on earth can the average person in the workplace avoid homelessness when they don't even make enough to cover rent?

You're talking about the Denver market, so I presume you're familiar with the tunnels underneath the Denver Airport. You know, the "secret" ones which nobody knows about and everybody talks about, where they keep the aliens from Areas 16, 49 and 2,469? (Area 51 thinks it's so special, like it's the Hollywood of Areas. The other Areas all turn up their noses/tentacles/probosci and sniff at Area 51.) Anyway, the public access to the tunnels is located from the basement beneath the mall, that's why there's always so many strange-looking "people" there mixed in with the normal folk. In a pinch, I'm sure they'd be willing to share their warm space with anybody who knows a good "knock-knock" joke.

Speaking of aliens, why are they traditionally portrayed as "little green men" in the media, with big heads and ships shaped like dinner plates? Isn't that just a little racist?

Generic_Excuse

Imagine if they portrayed them in more appeasing ways and handed out information that you can get probed by them. Wouldn't alot of lonely people be falling over themselves trying to get aliens to abduct them 24/7? Really portraying them scrawny, short, only 3 fingies, with green/gray with big heads and big black eyes is for there own good.



If I'm out for a walk and encounter a bear 🐻(a legit unreasonable fear of mine) what can I do to ward off the beast?

cmsienk

The solution here is to always go walking in animated (cartoon) forests. The bears you'll encounter there are friendly and only interested in your picnic basket (Yogi) or honey jar (Winnie the Pooh). Just bring along extra provisions and you'll be fine.

Alternatively, you could always make sure to go walking with a (much slower) friend. But that's a little dark and you might run out of friends.

Yesterday I checked on Lyft rides from this resort to LAX. Around 9 am the rate for a Lyft XL was $58. When I checked later in the day, it had gone up to $140. Why the big disparity? (Oh good grief... now it's over $200!)

nossmf

Were you not aware Lyft is auction-based? The more people click on Lyft rides, the higher the price goes. Your best bet for lower prices is to place a winning bid the first moment you see what it is, before other people have an opportunity to inflate the price with every click of the mouse. So, let's be proactive: go ahead and schedule every Lyft ride you are going to need for the next six months, right now. The prices will be at their lowest, your company will save so much money due to you being proactive that they're sure to give you a hefty bonus equal to 1% of what you saved them. (What is that? You don't know yet what all your Lyft requirements will be for the next six months? Sounds like you need to do better planning...)

Why is it I can get canned fruits/vegetables of the same quality all year long, but the quality of the fresh versions comes and goes over the year?

Generic_Excuse

The vegetables that come in cans are harvested by special labs and they always get first pick on the crops only taking the best ones. In these "labs" they are pumped with so many chemicals they start to have identity crisis and no longer even taste they way they're supposed to. So where as they may always look pretty, and at one point they truly where the "cream of the crop", now all they are are an empty shell of their former self marketed for their attractiveness and long shelf life. Very bleak existence.



Went to grab something from my Living room, forgot when I got there. What causes us to forget why we walked into a room?

nossmf

Why do we forget anything? Because like a computer memory, we only have storage space for so many bits of data. Once the storage becomes full, we must dump one piece of data to make room for the new data, or else the new data itself is lost. You see this quite often in old people, whose long lives have had so much data added to their internal storage that they have no room for new, leaving them vulnerable to either forget why they came into a room (no space for new data) or the names/faces of old acquaintances (considered less important than the new data being added).

So how do you upgrade your memory to be able to remember more things? Expensive surgery is an option, usually reserved for Nobel scientists and the like. For the average person, you need to resort to external memory devices, most frequently in the form of notebooks where you can write down memories you wish to retain without keeping them in your head. Einstein was a big proponent of this strategy, being quoted as saying, "Why remember something you can read in a book?"

When the temperature warms up to 50 degrees, you feel warm; when it cools down to 50 degrees, you feel chilled. It's the same temperature...why does it feel different?

s1im62

The reason is due to thermometers, and the fact that they contain mercury, a weird liquid metal that some idiot thought was a good idea to put into temperature measuring devices that have ended up all over the place!

Some people think that because it is sealed in glass that there's no problem, but mercury doesn't behave like most other elements, and you don't have to come in contact with it directly for it to do weird things to you.

One of the things that mercury does is to change bodily functions at the cellular level.

When the temperature rises, the cells affected by the mercury cause your metabolism to explode in activity, making you to overheat. When the temperature falls, the mercury reduces your metabolism, and you suddenly cannot generate enough body heat to feel comfortable.

If it wasn't for mercury, then 50 degrees would feel the same regardless of which way the temperature was moving, but the mercury screws up your body, and so everything goes all wonky.




Climate change is a real problem where I live, because it's way too hot in the summertime, and in the winter time frozen water is a big problem because it comes down from the sky and makes the ground very slippery, which is hazardous for old people like me. How can we change the climate to something more pleasant, like maybe just making it 72 degrees Fahrenheit all the time?

nossmf

Try staying indoors. My thermostat keeps the inside of my house at 72 degrees all the time, all year long.

Why is it called "fast food" when it takes longer sitting in the drive-thru line than it would take to prepare the same food at home?

Generic_Excuse

Oh no. Looks like you're confused. Fast Food wasn't named by the amount of time it takes to receive, it was named after William Fast who first invented selling burgers out of his trunk at his construction job in 1920. His burgers were so popular having all people in town coming to his car for "Fast's Food" he slowly had to expand his menu to include other items. Now the internet has stolen this information away from 'ol Mr. Fast and given credit to White Castle as being the oldest fast food chain but we all pay a little bit of tribute to William Fast everytime we refer to any quick chain meal as Fast Food. Hope that didn't answer your question at all.



Why is it easier to remember useless facts but not the important stuff?

frankwbrown

Useless things are easy to remember because your brain gives useless things higher priority, because... why not? Otherwise, you would be distracted by the important things in your life, and the useless things could be forgotten about, or entirely overlooked.

We sometimes forget that becoming really good at something takes a good deal of practice. I've heard that becoming expert at something takes around 10,000 hours of practice. But come on, isn't there a pill or something? I'm imagining something like: "Here, take this pill if you want to play guitar like Eric Clapton, take this pill if you want to play guitar like Pierre Bensusan, take this pill if you want to play kazoo really well..." etc.

nossmf

Didn't you know such pills already exist? They're called LSD, for Localized Skill Developer. Take one pill, and you will immediately become a master musician, an accomplished artist, or a delightful dancer. The trick is the skill is only in your own mind (hence the "Localized")...anybody else observing you will not see the same level of skill on display (and may in fact errantly believe the opposite), unless they too partake of the pill.

Once upon a time, somebody was the first to try every food eaten in the world today. Some foods are harmful unless cooked first, but did the first taste tester know this? And if not, what made the second tester think it would be a good idea to try the same food that killed his neighbor, if first held inside a fire?

s1im62

Natural foods are inherently unreliable because nature is focused like a laser beam on eliminating the human species.

You see, it wasn't the first person who tried a certain food that died, it was actually the second and then a random one now and then after that. That's how evil and sinister nature can be. Sometimes cooking will allow a person to live, and other times they die anyway. It's just one more way that Mother Nature tricks us into ending ourselves.

Around the 1950s and 60s some scientists begin to understand these facts, and tried to combat Mother Nature by inventing safe and healthy foods like Cheese Whiz, Little Debbie's cookies and cakes, and Hostess Twinkies and Ding Dongs.

Mother Nature confounded much of the good that could have been done by these remarkable inventions by convincing certain underworld figures to present themselves to the world as "consumer advocates", who then began criticizing the wonder foods as "unhealthy". Sadly, many well-meaning people remain convinced that these healthy and nutritious foods are bad for people.


What cheap and healthy food would you like to see invented to help address world hunger?