Girls do you like a nice guy? You just friendzoned him

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  • mikejholmes
    mikejholmes Posts: 291 Member
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    Everyone has good points :)

    Strong first post.

    th?id=H.4607062375531172&pid=15.1

    And nobody caught the clever bit about the zombie thread..... makes me sad....
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    i have to be sexually attracted to every guy who's nice to me and shows interest? GTFO. :angry:

    Of course not. The friendzone is not just a matter of "Oh, I'm not interested, sorry." It's more a matter of "I'm not interested but I'm going to let you continue to dote upon me while you labor under the delusion that if you just make the right kind gesture it would spark my interest after all."
    Why would you keep going out of your way for a woman who is clearly not interested in you if your only goal is to get into her pants? She's wrong for "letting" you keep doing nice things when she knows you aren't going to get anywhere?

    Stop doing that, then. Or be a truly nice guy and do things because you're a nice guy.

    My fiance takes really good care of my single friends -- fixes their cars, pays for drinks and dinners sometimes and helps out with things around their houses. He does those things because he IS a nice guy. He has no interest in anything other than a thank you from them.

    My best friend lives a couple hours away and she just bought a house. Every time we visit her, he fixes one thing or another for her or mows her lawn. Because, again, he's a nice person who enjoys doing nice things for people.
  • ajfrench
    ajfrench Posts: 323 Member
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    Nice guys. Love 'em. But, you have to have something a little more than just being "nice." Most of the time this is used as code for boring and dull. I know plenty of nice guys who get the girl - they usually are interesting and fun as well.
  • doorki
    doorki Posts: 2,611 Member
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    dFGW2.jpg
  • Cranquistador
    Cranquistador Posts: 39,744 Member
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    Everyone has good points :)

    Strong first post.

    th?id=H.4607062375531172&pid=15.1

    And nobody caught the clever bit about the zombie thread..... makes me sad....
    i did.


    i must be old

    to me a nice guy is simply a guy who is nice.

    some of the definitions here are weird:indifferent:
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    Please note this is different from women who don't actually tell a man she's not interested, and intentionally leads him on.

    I think at some point, no matter what she says, if a woman isn't interested it's pretty obvious and if the guy continues pursuiing her it's as much on him as it is on her.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
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    Everyone has good points :)

    Strong first post.

    th?id=H.4607062375531172&pid=15.1

    And nobody caught the clever bit about the zombie thread..... makes me sad....

    Oh my god! Make it right!
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
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    "You're such a nice guy." That has always been the kiss of death.

    I was relegated to the "nice guy" status so many times by gals I liked. Only to watch them get shlt on by some bad boy. I remember being hurt by that several times when I was younger. Now that I have had some years to reflect, I am so happy I found a woman that was looking for a "nice guy". Someone she could depend on.

    I am also happy that some of those women I wanted, but could never have, finally did find a "nice guy". I am just sorry that they had to go through some of the disapointment that they went through first.

    I can also say, proudly, that my own daughters were paying attention to they way I treated their mother, and they have set their standards high.

    Don't get me wrong. I can be a very bad boy. Just not with the people I care about.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    I was relegated to the "nice guy" status so many times by gals I liked. Only to watch them get shlt on by some bad boy.

    Haven't you said several times, though, that you cheated on every woman you dated AND your ex-wife? That your current wife is the only woman you have been faithful to in your entire life?

    I don't think that's the definiteion of a nice guy. At least not mine.
  • Samby_v1
    Samby_v1 Posts: 202 Member
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    My thoughts, if it hasn't already been posted...

    http://imgur.com/gallery/RmAjE
  • BeachGingerOnTheRocks
    BeachGingerOnTheRocks Posts: 3,927 Member
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    Games suck.
  • mank32
    mank32 Posts: 1,323 Member
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    It's interesting to me that men and women have such different views on what the "friend zone" is.

    i have always had more male friends than female. we'll hang out, watch movies, play games, hike, go for dinner, beers, whatever. want to hang out with me? great, let's do it. want to hang out with me (after i have made it perfectly clear that i am not 'available') because you hope you'll one day get more out of me than hanging out? *kitten* off, that's manipulation. i'm not flirting with or leading on these friends. i'm not letting them buy me stuff. i'm not giving them any kind of false hope. i'm focused on enjoying movies, games, dinners, and beers with people. as long as they keep their hands to themselves and their lips zipped with the 'friendzone' bs, i'm cool. i'm not responsible for whatever delusions they come up with in their own heads. i'm not the one putting them there. and yes, i have distanced myself from male 'friends' who couldn't keep their attraction in check.
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
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    I :heart: these threads.

    They're magnets for stereotypes, bitterness, *kitten* hats, and anti-social personalities.

    So . . . In.
  • SexKittenlovesitrough
    SexKittenlovesitrough Posts: 486
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    i like nice people.

    that's it.
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
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    I :heart: these threads.

    They're magnets for stereotypes, bitterness, *kitten* hats, and anti-social personalities.

    So . . . In.

    IKR? So many hateful women in here.

    I still hold that finding a great woman is harder than finding a great man.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
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    I was relegated to the "nice guy" status so many times by gals I liked. Only to watch them get shlt on by some bad boy.

    Haven't you said several times, though, that you cheated on every woman you dated AND your ex-wife? That your current wife is the only woman you have been faithful to in your entire life?

    I don't think that's the definiteion of a nice guy. At least not mine.

    I sure did. I guess I am not a nice guy. Never mind.
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
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    I :heart: these threads.

    They're magnets for stereotypes, bitterness, *kitten* hats, and anti-social personalities.

    So . . . In.

    IKR? So many hateful women in here.

    I still hold that finding a great woman is harder than finding a great man.

    I don't know about how common either good men or good women are, but I know I got lucky.
  • Roadie2000
    Roadie2000 Posts: 1,801 Member
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    "Nice guy" = entitled man with poor social skills who believes that women owe him sex (or a relationship if he's the type who insists that it's not about sex) if he displays the bare minimum of being (or pretending to be) a decent human being.
    Not quite. I've been the nice guy more times than I'd like to admit and I have a few friends who are still the nice guy. Nice guys don't always have poor social skills or expect anyone to have sex with them just for being nice. Basically, they just lack confidence when it comes to women.

    Women like guys with confidence, and they need to feel like they're pretty and desirable. Nice guys get put into the friendzone because they don't have the balls to make a move and they fear rejection, so they just act overly nice towards the girls they like in hopes that they'll make the move instead. Women write this off as a turnoff or a lack of interest and that's where the friendzone comes in. And then the nice guy gets confused when the girl falls for the guy with confidence even though he treats her like crap.
  • SGM_Adonis
    SGM_Adonis Posts: 1,565 Member
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    spotniceguy.gif
  • just_Jennie1
    just_Jennie1 Posts: 1,233
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    "Nice guy" = entitled man with poor social skills who believes that women owe him sex (or a relationship if he's the type who insists that it's not about sex) if he displays the bare minimum of being (or pretending to be) a decent human being.

    Huh.

    My husband is a very nice guy. He is also owns a business and is a professional electrical engineer. He has awesome social skills and we are constantly meeting new people and making friends every time we go out. I also have plenty of friends who are nice guys and none of them fit into the little box that you painted. In fact they're all professionals, well-educated and have social skills, which are the reasons why they are my friends.

    So . .not sure where your idea of what a nice guy comes from. To me your description fits the definition of an *kitten*.

    ETA: Then again maybe my definition of "nice guy" is different than everyone elses.

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