WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR OCTOBER 2020
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Barbie: I usually have a smart phone in my pocket, too. I don’t use a pedometer, and probably should up my exercise.
Lanette: I hope, (and think), my mint plant will survive. I cut it back and am drying ieaves. The plant was tucked under the rhododendron for the winter. I changed my mind and told DH to turn the water system back on until we have a hard frost. Watering should be automatic until winter arrives. .
Machka: I’m also a fan of year around daylight time.
I’m feeling good this evening. My dog is well, and I returned bathroom faucets that I didn’t like. Two wins!
Katla in beautiful NW Oregon
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Cheri and Karen – Lantana is a perennial here in SFL. It grows so quickly it gets very leggy. I usually plant in the summer because it is very draught resistant and provides a lot of color with very little maintenance.
Hugs to all.
SuziQ – SFL
Is that this plant?
https://www.abc.net.au/gardening/factsheets/weed-alert-lantana/9427632
M in OzCheri and Karen – Lantana is a perennial here in SFL. It grows so quickly it gets very leggy. I usually plant in the summer because it is very draught resistant and provides a lot of color with very little maintenance.
Hugs to all.
SuziQ – SFL
Is that this plant?
https://www.abc.net.au/gardening/factsheets/weed-alert-lantana/9427632
M in Oz
Yes, that is the plant. I grow it in pots so it does not spread. People call them flowers, but I have always called it a weed.
I call it a weed too. I hate it. It gets out of control so fast we can't keep up with it.0 -
Not sure if any of you will remember my angst from several months ago, maybe a year ago, when I posted about how I still grieved for the loss of friendship with my BFF Jeanette after nearly 40 years of close friendship. It came about because of my relationship with my spouse, and how she found out about it. It really threw her for a loop, and she reacted by just pretending I was dead, I think. She sent me a card saying she hoped I would be happy, and except for when her mother died, there have been no other personal or meaningful interactions between us since.
It was so very crushing to me, and has been one of my greatest griefs, in some ways worse than the deaths of my dear ones, because Jeanette and I are both still alive, and I have never been entirely successful at being completely at peace with it. After posting here extensively about it, I received much wisdom and tolerance and empathy, and I was able to be in a better place with it than I had been for the last decade.
A couple of days ago, Jeanette posted a photo of her little African Violet bursting with blooms. I immediately thought of Mom when I saw the photo, because Mom always had such luck with African Violets, and I loved them so, and Jeanette admired them. It made me happy to see the photo. I rarely comment or react to Jeanette’s posts, because of our falling out, and because I have been afraid she might unfriend me on FB. And so I did not comment on her African Violet photo, much as I wanted to.
Today, for the first time in many years, Jeanette sent me a private message on FB about how her little African Violet made her think of my mom's African Violets, and how fancy they always seemed to her. I am so touched, and my heart is full tonight. I don’t have hopes that we can restore the close friendship we once had, but this is a breakthrough. It means she is probably ready to let go of the past to some extent, and live in the present. So am I.
Here is a picture of the African Violet:
Karen in Virginia
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I have no opinion on DST vs Standard time, I just hate the time change twice a year. It is like having jet lag inflicted on the whole country for no good reason. DST has no effect on the amount of daylight each day. Days are short in winter and long in summer.
Karen, that would be great if you were able to rekindle your friendship.
We're not getting an extra hour of 2020, we're just getting back the hour we lost in the spring.
I would be fine in China where the whole country is on one time zone just so they don't move the clocks back and forward.
Barbie in NW WA
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Karen in VA ... I remember. Time has a way of softening our hard edges. Savor this moment.1
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Karen -
While I've been writing my memoir I've been reflecting on what happened with a particular friendship at school. I can now see how hurt she must have been when I drifted towards the three girls I still see today. She was a bit strange, and still is, but we were very close. Other people rarely see things the way we do.
I'm up in the night. Probably thinking about the decorator coming this morning. Although I actually woke up from a dream where I was about to adopt two dogs. I will try to get back to sleep soon.
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx3 -
Karen - I’m happy for you.
Tracey1 -
I have no opinion on DST vs Standard time, I just hate the time change twice a year. It is like having jet lag inflicted on the whole country for no good reason. DST has no effect on the amount of daylight each day. Days are short in winter and long in summer.
We're not getting an extra hour of 2020, we're just getting back the hour we lost in the spring.
Barbie in NW WA
Very true. The total number of hours in a year remains the same and the amount of daylight we get doesn't change just because we shift our clocks.
However, what it means for me and my fellow 9-5 work colleagues is that the shifting of the clocks gives us our evenings! We've gone from sunset at 6:19, shortly after I get home from work, to sunset at 7:22 tonight.
It means that not only do I get 1 hour of daylight at lunch ... I get an additional hour or more of daylight after work!
It means I can actually see what's in our garden!
It means that my husband and I should be able to go for walks to the beach in the evenings and perhaps even bicycle rides in the evenings soon.
https://www.timeanddate.com/sun/australia/hobart
Winter is over ... summer is on it's way.
If I had my way, I would have summer year round too. An ideal living situation for me would be to live in Australia from just after Thanksgiving (mid-October) to about mid-April and then move to Canada from about mid-April to mid-October. With, perhaps, a stop in Japan, South Korea, New Zealand, or Europe during the transitions.
Oh well.
Meanwhile, I'm enjoying the fact that we've got our evenings for a while.
M in Oz
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"Get to do"s and "chose well"sChose well: livestream church, dogs to powerline.
Bonus: Grocery Outlet, Freddie’s.
Get to do: inventory donation then call for appointment, take pics of car, test Bluetooth speaker so can do BB&B or T’ai Chi from voice recordings, Pilot tech support 5034447924 to link subscription and fix login, make experimental almond paste, declutter sideboard, practice new dances (Nothing but You, Shake it like that, Larger than Life, Here I Go Again/Mama Mia, Real Deal, Get it Right); make garlic almonds for Barb and Dan; prep potato area and raised beds for beets, carrots, parsley root, parsnips, radishes and sow; weed drive again, finish weeding flower bed, mulch flowerbed; invest another 10 minutes in prepping living trust, Freddie’s for complete series TDAP <$48, get Shingrix vaccine. Reward: inventory seeds, plan fall cool season garden, order replenishments, figure out where to plant naked lady bulbs, Tuesday: call Progressive adjustor.
Self Care October
3: take first step toward a goal that really matters to you: next step actually, continued commitment to dogs outside and steps goal.
4: see life as it really is but focus on the good: we may not be hearing, seeing, feeling as well as once we did, but we’re here, together and still like each other.
Rebecca thought of you at Grocery Outlet today. They had two flavors of mochi that I couldn't resist: Gingerbread and Salted Caramel. Indulged in a gingerbread tonight. Yum!
Katla happy dance for Schooner! Fingers X’d for the revival of the mint. Our mystery citrus that I thought I killed by forgetting to water it June, July and most of August, is now putting forth new little green leaves. How life persists!
Karen in VA Yes! I remember your grief clearly. My heart and eyes are filling with gratitude for the opening. (((HUGS)))
No news here, time to snooze.
Lighter, lovelies!
Barbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMODOctober: better than September.
daily: sit with Joe: 3, weigh: 3, steps>5491=5703 yesterday, 6868 today, vits=4 log=4 CI<CO=4 CI<250<CO=3 Tumble & Shadow 5=5 mfp=4 outside=4 up hill=4
wkly: T’ai Chi or BB&B x3= rx=1 dance= clean 30 mins=1
mnthly: board mtg= grant= 20for20=
bonus: AF=2 play= sew=04 -
From Action for Happiness ...
"Life is far from perfect, but there are lots of reasons for optimism. Setting positive goals for the future gives our lives a sense of direction and purpose. And although we face many challenges there are also lots of reasons to stay hopeful. By consciously choosing our priorities we can overcome issues, make progress and focus on what really matters."
https://www.actionforhappiness.org/optimistic-october
Focus on what's good
Of course, DST starting is fantastic. I'm sitting at home in the evening with post-rain blazing sunshine out there. Everything is soaked (about 65 mm (2.6 inches) of rain in this rain event) but the sun has just come out.
Start day with most important thing on list
I've been editing my assignment for the most part today. It's due on Friday and we really need to get the word count down!
M in Oz0 -
Karen - So happy for you!
Okie in the TX Hill Country1 -
Michele We will go on year-round daylight time. That will be nice for the winter and put dark at 5 PM instead of 4 PM.1
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Just a quick fly by.....Over the weekend I saw these on FB and both cracked me up!
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Fae gets smart
Yes, she does! In previous posts you wonderful babes of advanced years have endured my pitiful whining, whimpering, and moaning about how my high stepping and excessive sashaying in my early morning exercise routine creates leakage that requires bottoms to be changed and creates unnecessary excessive delicate wash laundry.
Well, after sitting on the pot till my legs went numb making sure my blatter was beyond empty, I still experienced this ego-deflating leakage this very morning. Yes, yes I did! After changing to new bottoms a stroke of pure genius hit me like a bolt of lightning. Why not just use a liner? I have a drawer full I have been reserving for special occasions.
Two sizes, either thin or thinner. I bet they work just as well in my low rise age-inappropriate workout out bottoms as they do in my high rise granny Spanx. Well. my granny panties aren't real Spanx but in fact a less spendy version by Vanity Fair. Be that as it may, the liner did its job, but was far from being an attractive presentation.
Reviewing my bucket list, I have boldly marked off #56 - Wear a scant cheeky bikini for a public beach workout at Megan's Bay, St. Thomas, USVI.
Fae the old river girl living high and dry
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Morning ladies
Dark and dreary morning.. will go get Homer and bring him over..
My SIL is going to send me over the edge.. honestly... she keeps there bedroom door locked we were running low on TP so i went in her bathroom and got a few rolls to put in the main bathroom..
She got home yesterday afternoon and asked if i had been in the bedroom and i told her that i went to get TP. So she sais she needs a space that is private and that she will keep TP in the garage.. ..
And in the next sentence can you do another Thursday overnight..
See when it involves something she wants its ok but other than that. She could care less..
Ugh....
Oh well it is what it is...but never would I treat my family the way she treats me.4 -
(((Allie))) ~ It's time to move on! I know the income from caring for Faith is good, but, the stress of it all is wearing you out. Are you looking for ways to move on once Faith is gone?
Carol in GA3 -
Fae gets lazy
That's right, old Ms. pinging off the walls the famed nervous Ninny is getting calm and lazy. No weed, grass, pot, Mary Jane, toke, reefer, bud, doobie, joint, or marijuana involved! OCD facial gyrations of an irritating kind, are still in full play, but I am feeling a bit more relaxed than usual. Achieving the relaxed cool and calm state I desire requires baby steps.
My first step is dropping the y from my name. I added the y when I was in grade school as it was advantageous on many levels. I wanted to be cool, although cool didn't get it's new definition until the '60s when the hippie dictionary was compiled. Kids, even back in the '50s loved to shorten names. The problem arose as many when they saw Fae written down couldn't say it as Fay, especially since another girl in my class was named Fay. So to distinguish, I started writing it down as Faye and saying my name is Fay with an e. I continued this my entire life until recently. I decided recently I like Faetta since it is on my official birth certificate that boasts an embossed gold-colored seal. However, being the old cool semi hippie chick fake auntie I am, I must shorten it to Fae since I am downsizing and simplifying. I have conferred with my fake great-nieces and they approve.
Fae turning a new leaf for fall
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💛💚💙💜🤎1
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Allie Your SIL isn't going to change but you can reframe your relationship and your attitude by seeing her as one of the shortcomings of a lucrative job that you're good at. No job is perfect. They all have something (weird co-workers, bad furniture, rest room far away from your office, too loud, too hot, too cold). Focus on how useful you can be and the safety of a hearty paycheck and ignore the rest.
Fae, we should all adopt your cheery spirit.
Today I'll plant the last of the iris bulbs and maybe I'll be finished in the yard, unless Jake asks me to plant his share of the tulip bulbs (he did that last year). With yard work finished, I can use more of my mornings for dancing.
Barbie in NW WA2 -
Allie I share your frustration and can offer no advice because I still let friends take advantage of me. Choices are difficult because we can never know the future outcome of our options. I could change some situations, but one thing I have learned in my almost 70 years is that this change may bring about unforeseen or even unimaginable consequences that would bring about real hardships.
SuzieQ Great memes!!! The underwear one hit home especially since yesterday when I attempted hurriedly and forcefully donning my high rise full bottom Vanity Fair seamless high stretch undies and got my foot hung in the crotch and kept pushing hard just to have high elastic recoil and cast my foot back with unspeakable power and send my old bare butt back on the carpet. It stings a bit this morning and I fear I may have rug burn with no stories of secondary virginity loss.
Barbie I had to smile about Jake not planting his SHARE of the tulip bulbs. Reminds me of my old neighbor that was planting bulbs and his dog, Jake, was digging them up behind him. I didn't say a word and when he saw what was happening, he got mad at me for not speaking up. I told him to remember he accused me of micromanaging him like I was his wife so I decided to be like a wife and enjoy the show.
Karen That is wonderful that you can regain an old friendship. Sad that others judge friends by their lifestyles that in no way bring them any harm.
Fae - loyal to a fault, panty installation impaired, and amused by old men's folly.
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Fae - My DH and I each make our SHARE of our super king sized bed. He grumbled a bit at first, but now he does his half automatically.
The decorator has been here all day . I insisted on masks when we were in the same space, he was happy to oblige, but most of the time he has been in there by himself with the doors shut. I think he has done the ceiling. He went off at lunchtime to buy the paint, but I gave him the wrong name for the grey. I told him Urban Grey when it should have been Urban Sky. He came back without the grey as they couldn't find it.
He is a very sweet and gentle man. I’m beginning to calm down now that he's got started. Only managed less than four hours sleep last night. I am what my mother used to call a "worry mutton".
Went off for my flu jab this afternoon. Boy, were they efficient! They buzzed me in, I sat down, and was called immediately. DH is having his in two weeks time, they were so booked up. This is the first year he has bothered with it.
Having roasted Mediterranean vegetables tonight with feta, brown rice and a tahini and yoghurt dip. One of our favourites.
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx3 -
Lanette: Thanks for your link to the seat cushion. I’ll keep it. DH has ordered what he wants online. If it doesn’t get here, I’ll tell him to follow your link.
(((Allie))): I agree with Barbie. Your SIL will not change in her lifetime. :noway: You are an excellent caregiver. Ignore her efforts to criticize. Faith needs you at this time in her life. :flowerforyou:
RE: Watches: I wear my watch every day, except while showering or swimming. It tells time and date. Mine is water proof, so if I fall into the river it will keep working. I don’t want to swim in the river near my home due to water temperature, my lack of swimming endurance and river current. My iphone also has a watch function that I use regularly, but I don’t take it horseback riding or swimming. The place I ride doesn’t have good cell service so I often leave the phone in my parked car.
Katla in beautiful NW Oregon
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Allie Your SIL isn't going to change but you can reframe your relationship and your attitude by seeing her as one of the shortcomings of a lucrative job that you're good at. No job is perfect. They all have something (weird co-workers, bad furniture, rest room far away from your office, too loud, too hot, too cold). Focus on how useful you can be and the safety of a hearty paycheck and ignore the rest.
Barbie in NW WA
As always, Barbie has outstanding advice. You can't change her. So you either have to quit or, more preferably, roll your eyes and continue on. I roll my eyes at work at least once a day, sometimes a dozen times. I realize that it's more difficult in your situation because she is family, but reframing the relationship may make it more tolerable for you.
And I still love my job, but . . . sometimes . . . I just have to roll my eyes.
Flea
Willamette Valley, OR4 -
Allie I share your frustration and can offer no advice because I still let friends take advantage of me. Choices are difficult because we can never know the future outcome of our options. I could change some situations, but one thing I have learned in my almost 70 years is that this change may bring about unforeseen or even unimaginable consequences that would bring about real hardships.
Exactly! The devil you know, and all that.
Flea
Willamette Valley OR1 -
I survived my "quarantine" period. With my negative test result, and easing of symptoms (I still have a mild headache and an itchy throat), I am clear to go back to work. I am going to chalk the headache and sore throat up to seasonal allergies. Fall is one of my worst times -- the leaves falling and mildew and mold outside. It is lovely and smells wonderful, but I am highly allergic.
No one else in the family got sick, so that is wonderful news. And while we have a number of students on campus showing symptoms and isolating, no one yet, knock on wood, has tested positive. None of us thought we would get this far, and we have only five weeks to go. (We are ending the semester before Thanksgiving to get everybody home and not to return until January, when things were supposed to be better . . .)
The professor who has cancer hasn't started chemo yet, so he is coming to campus today and next Monday to teach two classes for me. It will be a much needed break for me and will be very good emotionally for him. He has been feeling very isolated and disconnected, and needs to reconnect with his students. I will still attend class, but I will joyfully, sit in the door way (I don't think we have room capacity for me to sit in a chair in the room) and just relax and enjoy. What a blessing!
I have missed birthdays and anniversaries and successful puppy surgeries. My life will return to the new "normal" at thanksgiving time.
Oh, and our pup is hanging in there. One of his heart medicines, apparently, has gone out of stock everywhere, so he is beginning to suffer a bit, but I am hopeful it will come back in somewhere soon. He is still in good spirits, but sleeps a lot.
Flea
Willamette Valley, OR5 -
"Get to do"s and "chose well"sChose well: livestream church, dogs to powerline.
Bonus: Grocery Outlet, Freddie’s.
Get to do: inventory donation then call for appointment, take pics of car, test Bluetooth speaker so can do BB&B or T’ai Chi from voice recordings, Pilot tech support 5034447924 to link subscription and fix login, make experimental almond paste, declutter sideboard, practice new dances (Nothing but You, Shake it like that, Larger than Life, Here I Go Again/Mama Mia, Real Deal, Get it Right); make garlic almonds for Barb and Dan; prep potato area and raised beds for beets, carrots, parsley root, parsnips, radishes and sow; weed drive again, finish weeding flower bed, mulch flowerbed; invest another 10 minutes in prepping living trust, Freddie’s for complete series TDAP <$48, get Shingrix vaccine. Reward: inventory seeds, plan fall cool season garden, order replenishments, figure out where to plant naked lady bulbs, Tuesday: call Progressive adjustor.
Self Care October
3: take first step toward a goal that really matters to you: next step actually, continued commitment to dogs outside and steps goal.
4: see life as it really is but focus on the good: we may not be hearing, seeing, feeling as well as once we did, but we’re here, together and still like each other.
Rebecca thought of you at Grocery Outlet today. They had two flavors of mochi that I couldn't resist: Gingerbread and Salted Caramel. Indulged in a gingerbread tonight. Yum!
Katla happy dance for Schooner! Fingers X’d for the revival of the mint. Our mystery citrus that I thought I killed by forgetting to water it June, July and most of August, is now putting forth new little green leaves. How life persists!
Karen in VA Yes! I remember your grief clearly. My heart and eyes are filling with gratitude for the opening. (((HUGS)))
No news here, time to snooze.
Lighter, lovelies!
Barbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMODOctober: better than September.
daily: sit with Joe: 3, weigh: 3, steps>5491=5703 yesterday, 6868 today, vits=4 log=4 CI<CO=4 CI<250<CO=3 Tumble & Shadow 5=5 mfp=4 outside=4 up hill=4
wkly: T’ai Chi or BB&B x3= rx=1 dance= clean 30 mins=1
mnthly: board mtg= grant= 20for20=
bonus: AF=2 play= sew=0
Oooh yummy! I just finished my mango mochi ice cream balls! My son had graciously invited me over to his part of the house, (rec room living room off the kitchen). I munched on it while watching him play a Star Wars computer game. I had one of his ear buds in so I could hear all the action. He's always been great with spatial action, moving his tie-fighter around to fire. Its a gyroscope mapping, locking onto targets kinda deal. I was his mochi munching momma.... Great line for a song right?😁
💖Rebecca3
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