WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR FEBRUARY 2021
Replies
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I’m with you Flea about men. I feel the same way.
RvRitaOregonMother wrote: »Re: Men
I love my husband. But I have realized that I have never met a man who was not a narcissist. Maybe that says more about me than it does about the men I know, but all they really ever worry about is themselves. If their decisions/actions happen to benefit the rest of us, that's a bonus. I have been trying to tell myself for years that I am participating in confirmation bias, but really, after example after example, at what point do you say maybe the evidence really does point one way?
I guess that's harsh, but it is really how I feel.
So why would I ever want to have another relationship with a man? I am definitely done. Not leaving my husband, because love, but if he should pass before me, I will not look to attach myself to anyone else. I hope to have lots of friends and people to hang out with, but I want to be able to come back to my own home and be by myself. Like M said, read a book or cuddle with my cat/dog.
BTW, our power/internet was restored yesterday. Almost five days without. I am really feeling for the people in Texas. The stories coming out of there are horrifying.
Flea
Willamette Valley, OR
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Mrs_Hoffer wrote: »I should have been born in December or February!
I'm a May baby..... that sounds about right for me! Bahahaha!
I too do the timer for 15 minutes thing. That was something that I recently read about and started doing. I'm in and out of the kitchen most of the day, so it's easy to just keep it clean as I go. I just OFTEN have to come around behind DH and wipe up excess water or crumbs that he leaves on the counter. I spot-clean the oven and fridge "as needed".
I'm having a "surprise" dinner tomorrow night (Saturday) for Jim's birthday. Surprise because he doesn't know about it yet. So I've been cleaning the house this week either before he gets up or while he is out for his walk. I cleaned out the fireplace, dusted, and mopped the kitchen floor at 7am this morning! Lol. I'm making prime rib tomorrow and he's requested a chocolate "ding dong" cake. 2 other couples are coming and they are each bringing a side dish (a potato dish and a salad). After dinner we will all play Mexican Train.
I did this same thing a couple of years ago for his birthday and the Alexa thingamabob that we have in the house evidently told him (during the day while I was out) that the Wait's and the Heinze's were coming over that night because I had it on my google calendar. I didn't know that Alexa was reading him everything that was on my google calendar every morning (which typically was not a problem). When I came home that afternoon he asked, "why are the Wait's and the Heinze's coming over tonight?" I just looked at him....trying to figure out how he knew and if I should lie to him!
I finally just asked, "how do you know that?" and he said "Alexa told me!"
I've since disconnected my google calendar from the Alexa.
Pip : the floor looks terrific! Your new place seems to be coming along nicely!
Tracey : I'm sorry to hear about your friends mom. Thanks for sharing your story.
Teresa in OH
I think Alexa is a bit toooo nosey- the other night she told me that I needed to replace the yellow ink cartridge in my Cannon printer because it was low and asked if I wanted to order more.
Yes, it needed to be replaced, already had extras here.
Ok, Have a great weekend everyone- Heading up to mom's until Monday morning.
Debbie
Napa Valley,CA2 -
I was asked to become a substitute teacher at an elementary school yesterday ( K-5). I said yes. We shall see where this goes! I wasn’t looking but it will be good to do something and make some extra money.
Been feeling much better so convinced Colitis was culprit.
Weather warming up today. So glad if that!
Take care ladies!
RvRita7 -
I am really upset. I have my blood work done every 6 months and see my doctor for diabetic visit. I always have my lab work done at the hospital as it is cheaper and I am here everyday. I also get a copy for my records. This week I had it done and when I picked up my results they had done an HIV and Hep C test. But not cholesterol or blood count. When I called the office to ask I was told that everyone 15-74 years old has to have a HIV and HepC test done once in their life time. Then she asks if I think I need the other 2 done. I said I think so with all the hives. covid and just regular diabetic stuff I do and that they have done them every 6 months for years. So I had to go again today and get blood drawn. No one I have asked about this testing once a life time knows what I am talking about. Well I am not paying for those tests and I will be having a heated talk with the doctor Monday morning. I have no history or any problems that would say I could have either of these. Have any of you heard of this testing done before?
Time managemnet--I feel I must be on time or early. DH takes his time and I get so upset, so most the time I tell him we have to be somewhere half an hour before we need to, and we usually get there on time. His sisters are always a couple hours late, even when they are hosting the meal we end up eating at least an hour later. So I have started if we are hosting eating at the time we set and they can eat if there is any left when they get there, if they are hosting I just plan to get there an hour later. Keeps me from having a complete meltdown.
Blessings, Vicki GI NE 4 -
And another one related to recent topics of discussion ...
This made me giggle. I have a friend who is a financial planner. She said people come to her and when she asks their goal, they want yachts and summer homes--yet they haven't saved anything and are relying on social security for these items.
Tina in CA1 -
Flea: We have power, too. I’m grateful. Sending good wishes for your work situation.
Machka: I have a July birthday. I clean every week or two. We had a hired cleaner, but she wouldn’t follow Covid safety rules so I took over. I’m not good at cleaning, but I can vacuum, dust, and do dishes well enough.
Rita: Congrats on getting a subbing job at an elementary school! Getting to know the staff and the kids will be good for you. Back when, I was a parent volunteer. That led to a part time job offer and eventually, a fulltime job offer. It also led to lifelong friendships with a group of wonderful women. :flowerforyou:
Our recent snowfall is gradually melting away. We are at a low elevation and I hope things continue to warm a bit.
Katla in beautiful NW Oregon
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Flea - I feel more or less the same way about men. I have no desire to find another one for a romantic relationship, should the mister and I decide to part ways, be it breakup or death. I think if you’ve found one that is good to you and doesn’t take you for granted, you should hang onto him. That goes for any partner you may choose.
Heather - One of my grandfathers was a step-grandfather and he was just that…Grandpa. I never knew my blood grandfather. The blood factor had no bearing what-so-ever. I loved him just the same. I’m sure your grandchildren love your DH just the same as well.
Machka - That’s quite a story about your injury. I hope the neurosurgeon helps!
Allie - Good to hear you are feeling better.
Michele - I had the same question as Barbara. Good peaches in February?
Barbara - I have a glass of apple cider vinegar, a saucer of apple cider vinegar, and a little bit of sauvignon blanc in a glass. The little flies seem to like the wine best. I guess I can’t blame them.
Sue - Glad your procedure went well.
Pip - You must have had more rain than we have. It’s still pretty brown here. I love the flooring.
Tracey - Hope you feel better soon! Keep up with those exercises and you should start to have improvement. It took me a while to feel it too. I was so focused on the pain.
Vicki - I have never heard of a medical professional recommending HIV or HepC as preventive or mandatory or if there are no symptoms or reason to test for those things. That seems a bit nutty. Perhaps the lab made a mistake (tested for the wrong things) and didn’t want to admit it.
I volunteered at a COVID vaccination center yesterday and will do so again today. I signed up because I wanted to do something meaningful and to get out of the house. They were nearly begging for volunteers at the time. It was sort of “fun” and I felt like I was helping. They ask for a 3 shift commitment. I will finish that on Monday, but would be happy to do more if they need me…however, I don’t think they do. They were turning volunteers away yesterday.
The mister got his second Moderna vaccine yesterday and is not doing well. This one is definitely worse than the first one. He was shaking for an hour last night and could not warm up. He had a 101.3 F / 38.5 C fever as well. His arm is very sore, but not more than the first one. He is also complaining about nausea and his heart rate is 20+ BPM higher than normal. I think these vaccines affect the younger more severely than the older. I am advising people not to schedule anything the day after that cannot be easily cancelled.
Stay warm and healthy, everyone.
Tina in CA3 -
Tina - I think you should report those side effects. That is not normal.
My DH is soooooo beloved by my grandchildren I sometimes feel like a spare part.
I had to learn how to be a granny, I'm not a natural with children. I think my own kids put up with me. They seem quite fond of me though, amazingly. My mother was absolutely useless with the grandchildren, but my ex's mum was wonderful and beloved. I have learnt so much about how to talk to and play with children from DH. He is a genius 'child whisperer'. I have got much better from observing him and my DDIL. The grandchildren do love me, but he is the playmate. I'm happy for him because neither of his daughters have had children. 
Everybody I know thinks my DH is amazing with the kids, even my DDIL'S parents, who are in awe. They often say, "Isn't John wonderful!" as he plays for hours out in the garden. At parties they would come in the door and say, "Johnny, can you play with us?" Or even, "Johnny, I want to do a poo." It was always him they would ask. I so admire his skill with children. It is something quite exceptional.
Heather, happy to have heat, in Hove UK xxxxxxxx0 -
"Get to do"s and "chose well"sChose well: chose new cell phones, signed up for new cell service, reconciled bank accounts, paid credit card bill.
Bonus: 25 mins Leslie Sansome.
Get to do: take BP, dogs to powerline, call S, call C, call R, Freddie’s for rx & bubble water, start taxes, fire district: minutes, input 2019 call sheets into NFIRS, work with chief on equipment letter, substance abuse policy, NFIRS mutual aid and other missing details, call Credit union re: credit card, ask for boots donator contact info, appreciation letter or certificate to boots donator, index mutual aid files; FM Cu, watch STAS Day 20, make experimental almond paste, declutter sideboard, practice new dances (Do Your Thing, Pure Movies to Wine, Beer, Whiskey, I ain’t never gonna love nobody but Cornell Crawford (Alley cat), A Little Less Broken, One Margarita, I’m so used to being broke, All Night, Nothing but You, Blame it on my beating heart, Homesick); finish mulching flowerbed; broadcast cover crop seed in veg garden areas, invest another 10 minutes in prepping living trust, Freddie’s for complete series TDAP <$48, get Shingrix vaccine, find and configure a screen time popup, figure out where to plant naked lady bulbs, and soon as it warms up above 50 and dries out below 60% humidity I’ll tape and spray paint those rusted areas of Aunt Elsie’s stove. Reconcile Joe’s EOB’s Thrivent shows only 2263.48 so far, next BGBS ask Terry about GB’s FD firetruck tax levy – contacts, media, advocate???, call Wild Rivers (541 247 3514) for dog wash/nail trim appointments.
Reward: inventory seeds, plan next year’s garden, wishlist replenishments,
Friendly February:
19: Share a video or message you find inspiring. Shared the “One Day” youtube to my FB timeline.
Last night: Took most all day to decide on new phones, order them and sign up for the new mobile service. After trying to do online, ended up having to call. Now my bank’s online system is on the fritz, can’t redeem rewards or contact tech support. Maybe I should just go to bed. Heard Joe get up so sat with him for a bit. Update this morning bank website fixed, rewards redeemed, bill paid.
Teresa
your wedding pic and the happy ending to such a harrowing story. Hope #3 is where he can never hurt anyone again.
Sue in WA very relieved with your results. Sure hear you about the new roof. Ours cost $14K and now the guy has skipped town. We’re lucky, no leaks yet, but what appears to be a new stain over the front door. Our local Grocery Outlet has not been so lucky. Their new roof is leaking… a lot. Likely litigation will follow.
Pip the “down below on the trail when we got here” pic. I’m happy here where it is lush and green, but seeing that scene lifted my heart. Reminded me of the area east of the Berkely/Oakland hills, or around Vallejo before all the development. Guess all those years in Boise gave me a fondness for high desert and big open sky… just not black ice The pic now is pretty but the first one really got me. Great floor!
Carol, right back atcha!
Allie hope you are able to rest easier now without the monitor. Can someone bring Alfie to you for a visit?
Flea some of what you said about men really resonated, but had to look “confirmation bias” up on Wikipedia. Very apt and alas, I fear, a pandemic in these times. for the president’s unprofessional, knee jerk, defensive email. Of what is he afraid?
Men: Like Evelyn most of the time, Joe is outside, in the garage or in the man cave, while I’m out and about (pre-pandemic), in the office, or dinking around in the kitchen or garden. We dine together only once or twice a month when I prepare a meal, otherwise our natural eating times are just too different to eat together comfortably.
Ginny “I don't think I would want to live with anyone else” that would be my challenge. I’m so accustomed to doing what I want, when I want. I might like to live in a neighborhood, living in the forest is peaceful and without the conflicts of other people, but think I need a little social feedback connection too.
Margaret is that a Mardi Gras-ized hen house?
Tracey ((hugs)) for your loss, for what your friend went through, and for your pain. Long term pain is so exhausting. It’s so hard to heal when you can’t sleep comfortably. ((hugs)) Hope your “hairdresser” visit is restorative.
Heather “Can't think or do anything until this is fixed. I can feel my whole body tensing up!” Sounds like survival mode. I remember when my apartment heater broke and the landlord dragged his heels to get it fixed, I used to stay at work as long as I could, then cry all the way home. Hope you can wrap up, sip something hot, and that the fixer arrives SOON!
Machka that birth month type of cleaner meme has me dead to rights. You guessed it, my birthday is early March, with February undertones.
Lisa “fell in my lap without warning” Yup. At 35 I’d accepted that there was not going to be a man in my life, and was ok with that. Good life, job, friends, family, I was content. Then suddenly the guy I’d been taking my car to for years and I got together. He’d been married for a year when he was 21. We didn’t marry ‘til 38. 32 years married, 35 years together. Ups and downs, sure, but the best wine was kept for last.
Julie “…some [repair people] don’t show up at all…” Aha! Never suspected “No hurry in Curry” was evidence of a French influence Hooray for 3 pomidoros!
Rita I am with you and Flea about male narcissism. I call it “testosterone poisoning.” That having been said, Joe HAS become more thoughtful in recent years. More of the best wine kept for last. Congrats on the surprise job offer! You are one brave gal to face a classroom full if K-5 kids.
Speaking of kids, hope all’s well with Kelly. Think of her every morning when I wring out the sponge Joe left…
Debbie we don’t, and won’t, have Alexa or Echo or Hey Google or Siri because the idea of a cloud based something listening in all the time just creeps me out. Time to re-read 1984.
Vicki think it might be a Medicare recommendation. My doc asked me if I’d ever donated blood. When I replied yes, he said then you don’t need the Hep C test, the Red Cross would have tested. Guess they would have tested for HIV too. I’d be really angry if I fasted for blood count or cholesterol and they didn’t do it. What’s happened here is that I fasted but the order got lost between Dr and Lab, hence my history with the lab’s front desk gal. You could say I was p!$$ed. Now I try to call the afternoon before to confirm. Fooey!
Tina “…they want yachts and summer homes--yet they haven't saved anything and are relying on social security”… that makes ME giggle. That and your fruit flies’ elevated taste. :laugh: What is your birth month? Sorry to hear of your DH’s reaction to the 2nd dose.
No shock this morning, 3 pounds of the surprise drop bounced back. I’ve procrastinated about the minutes long enough but will take advantage of this little break in the rain to get the dogs out and run some errands. The minutes can wait another day.
Lighter, lovelies!
Barbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD
February: leaner/stronger/kinder than January.
daily: sit with Joe: 19, weigh/wii: 19/13/45; steps>5627=4793, vits=17, log=18, CI<CO=14, CI<250<CO=9, Tumble=12 Shadow=12 mfp=17 outside=9 up hill=8
wkly: BB&B,T’ai Chi or SWSY x3= rx=2 dance=1 clean 60 mins=1.75 packwalk=3, wt=1/31:141.3 2/7:142 2/14: 141.5 141.5 2/21: 2/28
mnthly: board mtg=1, grant=5 , 21 plan= bonus: AF=10 play=13 sew= waist=42.5
2021: choose to be leaner/stronger/kinder NOW2 -
Allie: Good news that you no longer need the monitor! ❤️ I like Barbara’s idea for a short visit with Alfie if you’re feeling up to it. ⭐️0
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A picture of my Mandelorian and some ice pics I took on my walk this morning.
Application in for job and they are rushing it through! Guess they are desperate! Lol wish me luck!
RvRita
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cityjaneLondon wrote: »Tina - I think you should report those side effects. That is not normal.
Heather, happy to have heat, in Hove UK xxxxxxxx
Actually, these are normal side effects for some, especially after the second dose of Moderna. If it goes on for 24+ hours, it's considered not normal...at least for those in his age category. I think if he were older, I'd be more concerned.
Tina in CA0 -
Tina “…they want yachts and summer homes--yet they haven't saved anything and are relying on social security”… that makes ME giggle. That and your fruit flies’ elevated taste. :laugh: What is your birth month? Sorry to hear of your DH’s reaction to the 2nd dose.Barbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD
February: leaner/stronger/kinder than January.
daily: sit with Joe: 19, weigh/wii: 19/13/45; steps>5627=4793, vits=17, log=18, CI<CO=14, CI<250<CO=9, Tumble=12 Shadow=12 mfp=17 outside=9 up hill=8
wkly: BB&B,T’ai Chi or SWSY x3= rx=2 dance=1 clean 60 mins=1.75 packwalk=3, wt=1/31:141.3 2/7:142 2/14: 141.5 141.5 2/21: 2/28
mnthly: board mtg=1, grant=5 , 21 plan= bonus: AF=10 play=13 sew= waist=42.5
2021: choose to be leaner/stronger/kinder NOW
My birth month is August.
Tina0 -
Afternoon ladies
I have been busy today ,did a load of laundry and dragged it down to the dryer,and came back and folded them up.. walked the hall and did my PT ..
I also took a couple of small naps,here is hoping I can sleep tonight.. did find out that if i take my bra off at night its much easier to sleep..
It is very hard being a 42 G but i did buy a 44 G because I am wearing a life vest that is a portable defibrillator that has to touch the skin..it is cumbersome and annoying the battery pack is 3-4 lbs and i have to haul it around ,its on a strap oh,well..
Sorry for venting,its going to be a long time before Im a hundred percent. But will take it a day at a time..
Oh and since November i went from 198 lbs in the hospital to I am down to 178.9 because my appetite has decreased and I no longer crave sweets or tea.. which I read can happen sometimes with heart surgery patients,weird huh?9 -
Allie, It is wonderful to hear from you! It sounds like you are doing the right things to help your healing. Yay!0
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Aaaa0
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enjoying reading your posts. sleeply here.0
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cityjaneLondon wrote: »Tina - I think you should report those side effects. That is not normal.
Heather, happy to have heat, in Hove UK xxxxxxxx
Actually, these are normal side effects for some, especially after the second dose of Moderna. If it goes on for 24+ hours, it's considered not normal...at least for those in his age category. I think if he were older, I'd be more concerned.
Tina in CA
I agree. Those are almost exactly the side effects my son (24, EMT) had from his second Moderna. My mother is also taking Moderna, so I am planning to stay with her for three days after her second shot/jab, just in case she has the same issues.
Flea
Willamette Valley, OR0 -
Vicki ~ I was given the HIV test a couple of years ago. Evidently, since I am a child of the 60's & 70's they think there is a possibility people of that generation could be infected. I wasn't LOL.
I do not sing as I clean!
Made a huge pot of very beefy vegetable soup for my son's family today along with a chocolate cake and ice cream. Granddaughter helped make a pan of cornbread to go with the soup. It was a very relaxing luncheon and fun to be with them.
Carol in GA3 -
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I'm lying on the sofa luxuriating in the heat. I appreciate it so much more now.
Spent the evening watching Place In The Sun, about buying houses in Italy and Spain. Then watched a programme on Crete. So I've been virtual travelling. Lovely! Once upon a time my dream was a house in France. Nowadays I'd much rather rent a holiday house and let someone else have all the bother. Plus I don't want to actually live permanently anywhere other than Hove. But we both like to watch the programmes together and talk about our dream house abroad. We usually agree.
Flea - That sounds like a very important position you are after. I hope you get it.
We are forecast a warm weekend with winds from the south.
What a change! Our daffodils are out in the front garden.
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx0 -
Stats for the day-
Walk w/family- 1hr 33min 37sec, 86ahr, 106mhr, 3.40ap, 5.33mi= 479c
Strava app = 646c
Other- 1hr 22min 21sec, work on home= 380c
Total cal 8590 -
NOTHWR good score from OfferUp, a garage spare fridge for $50 and will deliver for an extra $25
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Job update belowEverything is fine. I am such a worrier. We had a great discussion. There is just one dean who is upset, but not at me. He told the provost that he is a totalitarian dictator. Whatever. The provost told me to wait a few weeks and then to begin reaching out to the new direct reports, including the upset dean.
So it's all still on. The president is on a bit of a rampage and requiring a kind of loyalty pledge from the cabinet members, and that's partly my fault, but it also looks like many people have been after him about a similar issue, and he's just sick of it.
Life is so weird right now. The provost and I are both on campus. I can see his office window from my office window. We zoomed.
It sounds like you are healing, Allie. Keep up the good work!
Flea
Willamette Valley, OR5 -
One more cold night here and then we should be out of the woods for pipes breaking. Things started thawing out today. Sun was out and it got up to 35F. We were finally able to leave the house and I got a lovely big salad!!
Our last 1099 dropped today so I finished our taxes and have them ready for a final review in a couple of days. I like to walk away and then go through everything start to finish to be sure I didn’t miss anything.
Okie in the (thawing) TX Hill Country3 -
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dlfk202000 wrote: »Mrs_Hoffer wrote: »I should have been born in December or February!
I'm a May baby..... that sounds about right for me! Bahahaha!
I too do the timer for 15 minutes thing. That was something that I recently read about and started doing. I'm in and out of the kitchen most of the day, so it's easy to just keep it clean as I go. I just OFTEN have to come around behind DH and wipe up excess water or crumbs that he leaves on the counter. I spot-clean the oven and fridge "as needed".
I'm having a "surprise" dinner tomorrow night (Saturday) for Jim's birthday. Surprise because he doesn't know about it yet. So I've been cleaning the house this week either before he gets up or while he is out for his walk. I cleaned out the fireplace, dusted, and mopped the kitchen floor at 7am this morning! Lol. I'm making prime rib tomorrow and he's requested a chocolate "ding dong" cake. 2 other couples are coming and they are each bringing a side dish (a potato dish and a salad). After dinner we will all play Mexican Train.
I did this same thing a couple of years ago for his birthday and the Alexa thingamabob that we have in the house evidently told him (during the day while I was out) that the Wait's and the Heinze's were coming over that night because I had it on my google calendar. I didn't know that Alexa was reading him everything that was on my google calendar every morning (which typically was not a problem). When I came home that afternoon he asked, "why are the Wait's and the Heinze's coming over tonight?" I just looked at him....trying to figure out how he knew and if I should lie to him! I finally just asked, "how do you know that?" and he said "Alexa told me!"
I've since disconnected my google calendar from the Alexa.
Pip : the floor looks terrific! Your new place seems to be coming along nicely!
Tracey : I'm sorry to hear about your friends mom. Thanks for sharing your story. Teresa in OH
I think Alexa is a bit toooo nosey- the other night she told me that I needed to replace the yellow ink cartridge in my Cannon printer because it was low and asked if I wanted to order more.
Yes, it needed to be replaced, already had extras here.
Ok, Have a great weekend everyone- Heading up to mom's until Monday morning.
Debbie
Napa Valley,CA
I won't have an Alexa (or similar) in my house.
The IT community I work with and have attended uni with are divided on things like that. Some embrace all the new technologies. Others, like me, tend to shy away from them.
M in Oz1 -
OregonMother wrote: »Job update belowEverything is fine. I am such a worrier. We had a great discussion. There is just one dean who is upset, but not at me. He told the provost that he is a totalitarian dictator. Whatever. The provost told me to wait a few weeks and then to begin reaching out to the new direct reports, including the upset dean.
So it's all still on. The president is on a bit of a rampage and requiring a kind of loyalty pledge from the cabinet members, and that's partly my fault, but it also looks like many people have been after him about a similar issue, and he's just sick of it.
Life is so weird right now. The provost and I are both on campus. I can see his office window from my office window. We zoomed.
It sounds like you are healing, Allie. Keep up the good work!
Flea
Willamette Valley, OR
I'm glad things look like they are working out. Politics are weird. Same sort of things go on in my office.
M in Oz0
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