WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR JUNE 2021
Michele I'm sorry to hear that your visit with Denise and PJ was so disappointing0
Hello again... it's just me.
Visited my parents over the weekend. Advocated strongly for my mother's care ... and something I advocated for is seeming to help. She got sick about 3 years ago, and has been in a constant state of decline. She has mold, parasites, and heavy metals -- and high cortisol. Her cortisol has been extremely high for 3 years. The exact cause isn't really known, it could be a tumor, or it could be the stress from the mold, parasites, and heavy metals. What I do know, is that it has been causing her muscles to steadily waste away -- leaving her essentially bed-ridden. I encouraged her over 6 weeks ago to have a whey protein drink, with dark chocolate before bed. Unfortunately, 6 weeks ago, they only added it sporadically and did not track how my mom slept or felt the day following. THIS time, I insisted she have it every night and they track how she sleeps and feels. For the first time in what seems like forever, my mom is sleeping a minimum of 6 hours straight at night, with most nights an added 1-2 hours of sleep after waking up at 5am to use the bathroom. It has been over three years since my mom has slept 6 solid hours (let alone 7-8 hours) 5 days in a row. It's the first real sustained glimmer of hope I've had in a long, long time. I have spent most of this year trying to resign myself to the fact that my mom was going to die -- as she has reached the point with the muscle wasting that it's difficult to even suck up food through a straw, sometimes breathing is difficult, and she has a hard time chewing a deviled egg. I followed up with my dad and asked that -- based upon this success -- and the issue of muscle wasting, would the doctor suggest any changes to her macros or meal plan that would help STOP the muscle wasting, and possibly allow my mom to regain some muscle while she is undergoing the long treatment for the toxins (mold, parasites, and metals). (The whey protein isolate at bedtime is known to increase serotonin, helping to calm individuals, and allowing for better rest, leading to a reduction in anxiety and better functionality the following day -- while dark chocolate aids in reducing cortisol -- the increased sleep is restorative, which also helps to lower cortisol and helps the body heal).
As for me, personally, I've now lost just over 10 pounds. I have less than 10 pounds to go until I am out of the 200 range. I probably won't start feeling like myself until I'm at least under 180 ... and I have no idea how long it will take to get there. I'd love to believe I'd be there in September, but it's more likely to be November or December. Trying to remind myself that I'm trying to create a sustainable way of life -- not a quick fix and fast-track back to 200+. Slow weight loss is sustainable weight loss. And, assuming I'm also in perimenopause, those hormone fluctuations can be an issue.
This week has been hard, because I'm bored with the food we have around the house. I need a bit more flavor and variety -- and because I was gone, there was no planning or forethought into what I'd be eating this week. I'm muddling through the best I can.
I did finish the summer of me challenge, got the $90 off of Hello Fresh, and will be trying that for 3 days a week starting next week for awhile. That may help get me over this hump (making fresh pico and guacamole will too -- as well as making more spaghetti sauce to have on some edamame pasta).
I have another doctor's appointment tomorrow. I hate that I have to go in just to get a referral for an x-ray. I've spent more in co-pays for this and that in the past several months for nothing other referrals elsewhere. It's kind of a pain. Not to mention the time off. After the x-ray I get to find out if I'm part of a class-action lawsuit -- or if I can breathe easy (IUD parts went missing ... physical exam didn't find them, nor did the sonogram ... so the x-ray will look for them outside my uterus. If it's outside of my uterus, I'm surgery bound. Oh, Joy. There is still a very slight possibility that the pieces "fell out" at some point (which is the best case scenario). And, I'm still waiting for insurance to okay my colonoscopy (more fun).
I'm heading to bed, as I plan to get up and go to the pool and swim a bit in the morning. Practice was canceled tonight, so I didn't get in the 2 hours of exercise I had planned. Due to storms, I may lose tomorrow, too.
Have a good evening.
LisaInArkansas Posts: 1,342 MemberHello again... it's just me.
Trying to remind myself that I'm trying to create a sustainable way of life -- not a quick fix and fast-track back to 200+. Slow weight loss is sustainable weight loss.
It's the hardest to achieve and the most rewarding--and applies to both eating and exercise. It's why liquid diets don't work forever, because they don't teach you to eat healthy foods. They are literally unsustainable. The best food intake pattern to choose is the one you will keep doing, and the best exercises are those you will continue to do. If you hate either one, they're incredibly hard to stick to, and the rebound from torturing ourselves that way shows up on the scale...
Trust yourself - you're going the right way.
The other Lisa - in AR
Finished dinner(turkey burger patty,no bun, one slice of thick cut bacon, 1 oz avocado, 1.5 t. mayo.
Tracked everything for today.
at 839 for the day so need to figure out what else to eat.
Trying AGAIN to find the right balance- either I under eat or slightly over eat.
I know I will have more raspberries.
Beth – congrats on that NSV. Of course it’s one!!! You have no idea how proud of you I am. Raw cookie dough is one of my downfalls, too. Also, thanks so much for the quote. Yes, I’ve got to learn not to expect ANYTHING, not even some courtesies.
Lisa VA – I’m so glad that the protein is helping your mom. Good luck at the doctor’s
They’re having the mahjongg online next week. As we were coming back from DE, one of the gals emailed me that one other person couldn’t make it and I was welcome to come there. I told her we were on our way home and the GPS said we’d be home between 6:30 and 7 and there is no way I could drive there. I could do it if it was online. To be honest, we got home around 5, but I really didn’t feel like driving there. Vince and I were talking tonight. Since they decided to do this “in person” game, so far they’ve done it 3 times, it’s been online a lot more than that. So we shall see how it goes.
We left Wed. to go to Denise’s. On the way there she told us “just a heads up, I don’t have anything prepared for dinner” so I just told her “that’s OK, we’ll figure something out”. Vince and I went to Subway, I had a turkey sub and just water to drink.
We told Denise that she didn’t need to take PJ to daycare on Thurs or Fri, that we’d watch him, which is what happened. I made a dinner of Shake & Bake chicken with noodles she had and some corn she had. Then on Fri I made ravioli she had (I also bought more just to be sure I had enough), garlic bread she had, bought lettuce, tomatoes, cukes for a salad. She only has 4 chairs for her table and PJ got on one of the chairs so I stood up. Pete told me to sit down, but I just told him “that’s OK, I’m used to eating standing up”. Then he told me to sit next to my daughter. She got up and walked away. Later that night he told Denise to sit in the living room and talk to us. She went upstairs
We told them to go out to a nice dinner on Sat. and we’d watch PJ. It was in the 90’s and they were going to go to Maria’s to go swimming at the pool in her development. Pete did ask us to go but we declined since we didn’t even have our bathing suits with us. So he, Denise and PJ went there. We had no idea what time they were going to be home or what. We did go to a ceramic place and I got a large crocodile (like I need more bisque), Vince got these cats. Well, they did come home then went to dinner and to Maria’s while we watched PJ. I got him ready for bed.
Sunday comes, we had no idea what their plans for dinner were. Denise made a pizza and she and Pete took it upstairs to eat. It took us a while to realize that we were on our own for dinner. So Vince went to Subway. In the meantime Pete was hanging some towels on his car to dry and he went out to get them. How he didn’t see Vince’s car gone, I really don’t understand. For some reason he locked the door. Why? That I don’t know. He knew he was going to work later that day and the door would have to be opened. Well, Vince couldn’t get in the house so he called Denise. Pete asked me to let Vince in. Then their dog peed on the kitchen floor. Pete said it was because the dog drank so much water while PJ was in the pool. When I called to Denise I got a “what” as if I was bothering her. I had to ask her to come to the top of the stairs since I didn’t want to shout. I asked her if she had any more paper towels since Rex (the dog) peed all over the floor. He’s about 85 pounds so you know it wasn’t a small tinkle. Guess who cleaned up most of it? I did find some napkins Denise had so I used those.
Guess who fed PJ most of the time? Well, every breakfast, most lunches and dinners.
Then Sun night we realized that we didn’t even get the chance to kiss PJ goodnight. You have no idea how much that hurt. I’m good enough to cook (without a “thank you”), good enough to feed and clothe PJ, but I’m not good enough to kiss him good night?????
Vince told her how hurt we were, he was ready to leave Sun after the dinner episode but we didn’t. He talked to Pete and Pete appears to be upset with Denise’s lack of communication, too. He also told Denise. Her response? "I'm sorry, I'm not the hostess with the mostess". To me, that doesn't excuse her behavior
Monday she left for work. I said “thank you for everything (really, nothing)”, didn’t get a response. At least Pete said “come up any time, you can stay here”.
Denise is super-stressed. I understand that, working full time and taking care of PJ, which is why I wanted to try to take some of the stress off her by watching PJ. She didn’t seem as stressed Sat. (I wonder if it’s because she didn’t have to take care of PJ constantly) but then seemed stressed Sunday (I wonder if it’s because Pete leaves for work for 12 days)
I was really crying on the way home and really pigged out. Back on track today.
You know, all the time we were there, not once did Denise or Pete take Rex for a walk. Admitted, I won’t because he really pulls. But we were there to watch PJ. In one sense, I hope Rex continues to pee on the floor. Maybe if he does, they will get rid of the dog (he deserves so much more) and that stress will be taken off Denise. Oh, guess who took him out most of the time? Guess who fed the cat?
Oh, at PJ's birthday party (which we didn't know about and weren't invited to) the people at where Denise works got together and bought him this car he can ride in. There is a remote so she can steer and a bluetooth radio, LED headlights. We told her before we went up that we had something he might like going for a walk with. Denise said "I hope it's not a bubble mower because he has one". Well, it was, but this one had those three words every parent loves to hear about toys "no batteries required". The one she got, yes it plays music, but it also takes 3AAA batteries. We did also give him a book where I read the pages and recorded my voice.
We'll probably go back up in Sept. and I'm thinking we'll get him a slide. I've found ones that fold up and can be used indoors/outdoors. Admitted, their place isn't exactly spacious but they can fold this up and put it against a wall or they can keep it in the garage. Any suggestions? What are some features to look for especially? Any brands that are especially good?
How was your time with PJ? What did you do? How old is he now? Did you play games? Go for walks?
You talk more about dinner and food than PJ, but I thought he was the main reason you were going.
Personally, I wouldn't go for a slide. Those things are big, cumbersome, and he'll outgrow it soon. If it were me, I'd go for a tricycle or early learning books and games.
But what did he seem to like when you were there?
M in Oz2
✳️✳️ ACCOUNTABILITY ✳️✳️
✔️Day 3: Tuesday, June 8th. NO BINGE
Back to school!
I'm taking a course called Understanding Traumatic Brain Injury.
No formal assessments.
Work at your own pace.
7 weeks maximum.
Machka in Oz
I've done the introduction and Module 1.
Module 1 was about parts of the brain and an introduction to general types of brain injury such as: open vs closed, mild, moderate and severe, focal and diffuse, primary and secondary.
It's nothing new so far except that I haven't heard much about the secondary injury aspect and want to learn more about that.
June is shaping up to be a busy month
• Pilates - about once a week.
• Audax meetings - that's the long distance cycling club I'm a part of.
• Designing another 50 km route for Audax. This one needs to be in southern Tasmania which is challenging.
• Cycle a 50 km route. Plus shorter rides.
• Run at least one 5 km distance.
• Plant bulbs. I've got to get these things in or it will be spring with no flowers!
• All-day work meeting tomorrow.
• A week off next week - some rest time, I hope! And cycling. I booked this week off to ward off the darkness.
• Back to school! I'm taking a 5 week course called 'Understanding Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI)' . It's all online and work-at-our-own-pace with no formal assignments, exams, etc.
• Bees! My husband and I are booked for a course to build a Warre Hive at the end of June.
• Plus, of course, my 2021 To Do List: getting organise, simplifying, etc. I've got 4 projects on the go right now and I "switch-task" between them.
That's all in addition to work and caring for my husband.
EDIT: Also ... the stair climbing challenge at work is to reach the height of Mount Ossa, the tallest mountain in Tasmania (1617 metres = 450 floors * 20 stairs/floor).
It is about noon on June 1 and I've done 20 floors so far. I've got a way to go.
Attended first Pilates class of June.
Ran Audax Tasmania AGM.
Planted bulbs. Ran out. That's OK. Stores don't have bulbs anymore.
Attended the all day meeting at work on Wednesday.
Started week off!
Started climbing stairs toward the elevation of Mount Ossa. I've done 90 of the 450 flights.
Finished with the Audax meetings.
Started short course.
Still enjoying time off.
I've been relaxing and reading for most of my time off. The weather has been atrocious! Pouring rain and howling wind. It's so windy that it is dangerous for us to be out cycling although it is possible I may try a short jog.
I am interested in doing this run in July and may need to train for it.
Russell Falls 6.2 km
Machka in Oz
"Get to do"s and "chose well"sChose well: BP, dogs to power line, meeting prep, board meetingJoyful June:
Bonus: chopped some salal from the area where the new water tank will go, 14 mins bathing Tumble.
Get to do: take BP, dogs to powerline, USE those torture bands/do that BB&B video, call S, fire district: minutes, NIMS to Chief, loan pre-approval extract to DH, contact list, drop off cookies, ongoing: input 2019 call sheets into NFIRS, work with chief on equipment letter, substance abuse policy, NFIRS mutual aid and other missing details, ask for boots donator contact info, appreciation letter or certificate to boots donator, index mutual aid files; watch STAS Day 20, declutter sideboard, learn new dances (Nothing but You, Do Your Thing, A Little Less Broken, Blame it on my beating heart, Homesick; practice dances: One Margarita, I’m so used to being broke, All Night, Pure Movies to Wine, Beer, Whiskey, I ain’t never gonna love nobody but Cornell Crawford (Alley cat),); finish mulching flowerbed, invest another 10 minutes in prepping living trust, Freddie’s for complete series TDAP <$48, get Shingrix vaccine, find and configure a screen time popup, figure out where to plant the last of the naked lady bulbs, and soon as it warms up above 50 and dries out below 60% humidity I’ll tape and spray paint those rusted areas of Aunt Elsie’s stove. ask Terry about GB’s FD firetruck tax levy – contacts, media, advocate???, Reward: inventory seeds, plan this spring’s garden, wishlist replenishments (Milena F1 orange peppers).
9-Ask a friend what made them happy recently… and LISTEN to her answer!!! Do this tomorrow while walking with D.
10-Bring joy to others by doing something kind for them:
Barbie I love your thought processes. Different priorities indeed.
Pip there were a few words that Mama or I would challenge on your Scrabble table… ( Budha a proper noun/the Hindu equivalent to the god Mercury? oa and jp abbreviations? emjust? cuduel?) but I was surprised to learn “doan” is an adjective meaning brunette-Thanks!, adventures with Yogi.
Michele welcome back, you were missed! Congrats on the refi. We’re in the process but it sure makes me shake my head at how new mortgage department can’t access current mortgage info from within the very same bank. Sad to hear about the visit, you must have felt so unwelcome. Glad you at least got to spend time with PJ. When I’m feeling under appreciated by my DH, I’ll say “Thank you Barbara, for [x]’ He gets the hint. but I’m afraid whatever Denise’s issues are, they are too deep for that to work.
Heather will your geraniums overwinter?
Beth you ARE virtuous!
Sue in WA wish I could send you our holly trees. No matter how far down we cut ‘em they just keep springing back up.
LisaK in VA good for you for advocating for your mother. How did she get the mold, parasites and heavy metals? Is she at home or in a care facility?
Lisa in AR your words about food and exercise, spot on and a timely reminder. Thank you!
Debbie “… more raspberries… “ Perfect!
Had to stop chopping brush after only half an hour, my lower back just ached so much. It’s been aching for awhile, usually after I’ve been sitting or lying too long, and usually eases soon as I get up and move around. I’m just really really hoping its not a side effect of the pravastatin I’m taking. When I was on atorvastatin the muscle and joint aches got so bad it was hard to get up out of a chair. Fingers X’d today’s ache was just predicting Friday’s rain…
Barbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMODJune: leaner/stronger/kinder than May.2021: choose to be leaner/stronger/kinder NOW
daily: sit with Joe: 9, weigh/wii: 9/0/0; steps>6362=3808, vits=7, log=9, CI<CO=9, CI<250<CO=6, Tumble=7, Shadow=10 mfp=9, outside=11, up hill=9, clean 10=2.
wkly: Sun: Mon: Tue: LD=2 Wed: TC=2 PW=1 Thurs: PW=1 Fri: TC=1 Sat: PW=1, rX x4=1.
wt=1/31:141.3 2/28:142.4 3/31:145.3 4/30:141.5 5/31:142.4 6/6:141.8 6/12: 6/20: 6/27: 6/30:
mnthly: board mtg=1, grant=, 21 plan=, waist=42.0
bonus: AF=5 play= sew=
hi I'm back to my usual pseudonym. I have no idea why or how I was logged on with that other pseudonym - remplacement when I couldn't get online in past pseudo - yesterday.2
wishing you all a good day.1
cityjaneLondon Posts: 10,986 MemberBarbara - Sometimes geraniums overwinter, it depends on how hard a frost we get. This winter our previous heroic survivors went down after several nights of -5°C. That's unusual in the South of England. (They can survive a bit of cold). We will not even try to overwinter the ones I planted yesterday. The pot is just outside our dining room window, in full view, so is intended to be a seasonal display. The tulips were outstanding this spring and lasted for ages. The bulbs are now in the garden. A few violas might give us colour in the winter with some bulbs buried underneath. I might put the geraniums somewhere in the late autumn, but we have very little open space available. The garden is really a habitat for the birds, with lots of dense shrubs and ivy. We have had many successful broods already. We love watching them while we are having our breakfast. Endless entertainment.
We have a small wild flower area up by the shed. It's beginning to look interesting. I'm fascinated by the natural world, especially insects.
I used to garden and have been very successful at vegetables, apart from brassicas. I have lost interest in active gardening since just before we moved here. Beautiful organic vegetables and fruit are readily available a few yards from my front door. I hate watering. I don't really like being outside in the garden. Even sitting. Not sure why. I've always been an indoors and a built environment kind of gal, all my life, though I do love the sea.
I love to look at beauty, nature and colour, but I don't want to do it any more. Luckily, I am now old enough to not feel guilty about following my own inclinations.
Love to all, Heather UK xxxxxxxx3
My passive aggressive side came out yesterday at work......Steve asked me if the chainsaw sitting up front could go to the back yet. Honest question as I will often sit them there if busy or needing to finish writing up the repair. I said , I dont know, you will have to ask your sister. She took it in. I dont know if he ever asked her, but the saw is still sitting there. She left at noon, so I guess she was bored. She goes in before 7, you would think she could finish something during the day.....Anyway, I was being productive with work paperwork, until she left. SMH-50% is how she does things and she really doesn't know the business beyond the books-sad.
On the positive side, yesterday was successful with caring for ME. I was 4k steps shy of goal in the evening. I could have walked outside, but that requires shoes. I put on music and danced those steps away. Steve came in and just shook his head at me. Good thing he wasnt inside when Jason Derulo was singing-lol. Mainly country, but do like a little Jason sometimes😎 So 10k steps, water, and CICO. 🙌
Michelle- I understand your frustrations about Denise and Pete. We are glad you have a safe place to vent. IMHO- think of the fun you had with PJ and that precious time. Remember the trip as a great bonding time with grandson. Hard to do, but much better on our own mental health.
Julie You are wonderful no matter what your screen name is that day! Glad to hear you smiling!
Debbie There will be days where calories are just low and others where they are high. I think it keeps the body guessing. Raspberries look wonderful! I love berries.
I better get my day going. Slept in a little(just a little)
Make the best choices you can today!
Yesterday is done.
Tomorrow not promised.
LOVE yourselves as you are all LOVED.
Kylia in foggy Ohio1
I'm all caught up with reading - over 300 posts. I don't have it in me to reply. Hugs to all who need them.2
Michelle I am sorry your visit was frustrating. Your DD sounds like she is overwhelmed. I moved far from home when I became an adult and I know my visits home did not always go smoothly. It was not always easy for me to have people stay with me too. Your DD reactions tell me she is someone who is overwhelmed. It sounds like you stepped in and did what you could to be a help. It sounds like Pete recognized your efforts by saying come back anytime. DD is so lost in her own just trying to handle everything she was unable to acknowlege what you did for her. I am sure PJ misses you.
That said love is the glue that heals. I remember when I went down to stay with my dad so my mom could have a break and go to a retreat she wanted to go to. At that time my dad could not be left alone. My dad was not an easy man in many ways. I remember him standing in the kitchen and he was just lost. What healed me was I asked him what I could do to help. He was one who who get angry if you got hurt. I could have gotten angry with him but I didn't.
Later I asked him what was the most important thing in his life. Instead of saying this theory he worked on a good portion of his adult life (If you met him that was all he could talk about whether you wanted to listen or not) he said it was his children. Yes love won out that day.
I had quite the day yesterday. I was at son's watering, watering, watering when I saw a woman with her young daughter run up neighbor's driveway and into their yard. I went to check and didn't see them. Suddenly they appeared in my yard and she is asking me if she can hid in my yard to avoid her ex. They went to hide briefly in my detached garage which was 108 degrees. I was not comfortable having her in my home especially when she told me her ex was mentally ill and she was afraid he would hurt her. I did agree to drive her to a safe location so she could get out of the neighborhood. It was traumatic for me after dealing with our mentally ill son for twelve years. As we drove we saw her ex at the corner with her other daughter. He has custody of her. She got custody of the other daughter. They talked of how they were going to go to Wisconsin to be with her twelve year old son. I didn't ask for anymore details.
Even though this sounds like a bad TV movie I am not making this up.
So the incident as hard as it was to go through in 98 degree heat and the trauma of dealing with son's illness others do have it much harder than I do. I send up a prayer for her, her daughter, and her family.
Out to go check on the garden here while it is cool enough.
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