WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR NOVEMBER 2021

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  • margaretturk
    margaretturk Posts: 5,258 Member
    Macha your story of trying to get help from the system is so similar to trying to get help here too. We call it red tape. I looked up the origin of the idiom. It comes from the practice of binding government documents with red ribbon. It has come to mean making a process so difficult it often hampers the process from getting done in a timely fashion if at all. Some of it I do think is done on purpose to keep people from applying in the first place.

    Here if you take the time to fill out the form and it is not filled out the way they want it filled out it comes back to you. I have learned something I thought was taken care of and done often has one more step. Sometimes I roll with it sometimes others times not as well depends... I have learned to be super polite and thankful to the person trying to help me I do often get better results. When the employee apoligizes for a mistake I often say you are not the one at fault so you do not need to apoligize lets just work together to try and to get this solved...ie...cut through the red tape.

    Your husband is lucky to have you as his advocate. It is not an easy role. I am glad you are finding those activities that are for you to recharge yourself.


  • Peach1948
    Peach1948 Posts: 2,473 Member
    o:)
  • cityjaneLondon
    cityjaneLondon Posts: 12,712 Member
    edited November 2021
    Went for my run along the seafront. DH took this photo of the clouds.

    7u751t3mfyg2.jpg

    We stopped off to buy spinach and ricotta tarts to freeze for guests sometime. They always go down well for lunch.
    Then we stopped to buy meat for DH to make a stew when I am gone, so that we can have leftovers when I get back. He chose lamb. We also bought calves' liver and pigs' cheeks. They only had two already prepared and I wanted four, so he went and got a pig's head out of the storeroom.

    8w92ln1yr28t.jpg

    Thought you all might like to say hello. :*

    Chatted to my brother on the phone while I was out running. <3
    He has a shocking cold and cough and is in bed. It seems to be going round. My DDIL had it.

    Love to all, Heather UK xxxxxxxx
  • bwcetc
    bwcetc Posts: 2,827 Member
    OregonMother wrote: »
    Machka9 wrote: »


    You're absolutely right about:

    3) We can ask ... but that doesn't mean we're going to get help. In fact, it becomes very frustrating when we do ask and ask and ask but there is no help available and people/organisations start becoming annoyed with the asking.


    Machka in Oz

    This is so true. And thank you for pointing it out. I had a group of friends beg me for my email address so that they could send me some food cards, and I kept saying, no, that I was fine. They persisted, so I relented. But no food cards have shown up in my email. So, if I had asked . . . My family is almost as bad. I didn't want to be nagging, so I made a list of three or four things that they could do to help me without my having to ask -- take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, and maybe clean the litter box -- I can't remember what the other one was. Anyway, none of it was ever done, and the words on the white board eventually just became smeared, so I erased them and just have done the things myself. Or I've had to verbally nag, which I really hate doing. I mean, why am I the only one who notices that the trash needs to be taken out?

    But it's okay. Just annoying.

    So, yes. I am afraid to ask my friends for help with anything because I don't want to be disappointed.

    Flea
    Willamette Valley, OR

    This is where my close circle of friends and my church really rose up for the occasion. Both when my son died and when I first broke my leg, a "meal schedule" was established by the church.. For the first 2-3 weeks of each event I had people bring meals every 2-3 days. At the time of my son's death, we were not allowed to have a meal after the funeral. As a result I received multiple gift cards for restaurants that are now all doing delivery. While it's been 9 months since my son's death and we're now 3 months past since the leg break, my closest friends are still checking in with me and bringing me lunch. However, my family is just like yours ... with a broken leg I was trying to figure out how to cook, clean, etc. Maddening that they can live in such clutter and dirt.

    Beth

  • csofled
    csofled Posts: 3,022 Member
    :)
  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 10,096 Member
    Afternoon ladies
    Well we made it to the Cape all in one piece, its cold and raw but its end of November so what should we expect..
    Stopped at the veterans cemetery and Ruth and Ray and buried in a vault in a wall. Together forever. We had so many good times..we are at the hotel,but might pop out to a Christmas tree shop just to start the week off right.
  • Anniesquats100
    Anniesquats100 Posts: 3,291 Member
    Well, it sounded so ridiculous that I just went over and asked. So it's green beans and a chocolate cake, for two o'clock. Good to know. I feel better now.

    Annie in Delaware
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 17,267 Member
    Stats for the day-

    Walk w/family- walk then to dentist not home, 1hr 44min 47sec, 59elev, 81ahr, 117mhr, 5.67mi= 522c
    Strava app = 685c
    Walk dentist to home- 6.15min, .33mi= 41c
    Strava app = 40c

    Total cal 611

    Had a cavity done, then the crown, nice that they did the crown in house.
  • margaretturk
    margaretturk Posts: 5,258 Member
    Vicki I like your idea too. I am finding I need reminders to keep me on track. I might do both. A calendar and a book to see which one like. I find the more I write something down the better I remember.
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,611 Member
    margaretturk wrote: »
    October was so busy for me I missed a payment. For some reason this company chose this month to stop sending a paper statement. I used that as my reminder to pay that bill. I called them to reinstate the paper billing. Now I have it on my calendar too. I do not want all my bills to be automatic. Some because it helps me monitor their price increases and some because it makes it easier to cancel the service.

    I am going over our finances with younger son because he will help settle the estate. One of the first thing I have in the book is to cancel any services no longer needed. They will continue to charge until you close the account. Another reason I want some paper bills. They won't fall through the cracks so easily. I am outling how bills are paid so it will make it easier to settle the estate. Also have your estate manger have ways to find and deal with accounts. It is hard enough even with all the info. Yes needs to be someone you trust. Best person is who you have as power of attorney.

    Fortunately the service fee was relatively low $10 for the bill I missed.

    Son and are taking about 20-30 minutes at a crack to go over things. Next step is together revamp the information so it is easier for the person to follow. The first thing we will plan is where to find things needed..keys, tax files, where is the will (trust) list of companies to maintain property, etc.

    I still need to do all of this. I thought when I finished university, I would have all kinds of time, but I feel like I've been just as busy.

    M in Oz
  • cityjaneLondon
    cityjaneLondon Posts: 12,712 Member
    I'm so glad I haven't got to worry about Thanksgiving. :)
    And I've almost completely eliminated Christmas. No presents, apart from DH morning presents and the grandkids. The only entertaining we are doing is the kids for lunch on Christmas Eve. :D I've ordered those snowballs you were all talking about. Plus I'm going to get musical crackers. What a relief not to haveto worry about food and organising presents. If the weather is good we will join the family on the beach to see the Christmas swimmers, then come home for our fishy lunch. Perfect! We are going to a restaurant with the family on the Monday for lunch. I hope my son will book it.
    If DSIL and boyfriend want to come down for a night sometime over the season, that's fine, but it won't be Christmassy. DH hasn't told her I'm not doing presents, so he will probably exchange with her. I will tell her next time she phones.

    I'm going to catch a slightly later train tomorrow morning, so I won't be so stressed. I will get to Nottingham mid afternoon and my son and his girlfriend are picking me up from the hotel in their new car.

    I hope I sleep tonight. I will sleep upstairs, so I won't disturb DH if I am restless.

    Lots of love to all, Heather UK xxxxxxxx
  • TerriRichardson112
    TerriRichardson112 Posts: 19,030 Member
    ☘️
  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 10,096 Member
    Evening ladies
    Well we are in for night ,in our jammies and im hoping to sleep well.. im sure i will ,poor Doris we are in a hotel that this uses a real key and she has it on a lanyard and cant find it..
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,611 Member
    Thanksgiving - I do miss Canadian Thanksgiving. It was a low-key, but pleasant time with my family, and there was always a day off.

    In Australia, we don't celebrate Thanksgiving at all.

    Christmas - I will decorate on December 1 as usual, and I'm planning to get a bit crafty with some decorations. There are next to no presents to buy. Dinner might be at a hotel buffet but more than likely it will be roast chicken at home with my husband. But I've got about 2 weeks off which is great -- hopefully lots of cycling!! :)

    Christmas is in mid-summer here.

    Travel - even if my husband and I could leave Tasmania, I don't think I'll feel comfortable travelling until at the earliest mid-2022. I am kind of hoping we might be able to nip up to Brisbane or somewhere warmer in about June/July for a few days, but there's a good chance it won't happen so I'm not holding my breath or anything.

    Meanwhile we are trying to explore a bit more of Tassie. Last weekend we went to Maria Island. We've been there once before in 2016 but didn't go far from the campground. The roads weren't in great condition then. Now they've improved so we went about 13 km south and back. That was a first for both of us. :)


    M in Oz
  • barbiecat
    barbiecat Posts: 17,202 Member
    :) I feel blessed with great time affluence not having to go to jury duty this week. I spent extra time walking with the dogs and talking to Jake. I've made progress on creating a pocket for Jake's new pj's for him to carry his pedometer, I've read a bit, and taken care of a few minor computer projects.

    :) Not having to prepare any sort of traditional Thanksgiving dinner has given me even more time. We will have pork chops cooked by Jake along with mashed potatoes and frozen corn. Being thankful is something we do every day.

    :) I have a 16 pound turkey in the freezer. Probably in January when it's cold and the days are short, I'll want a project. That's when I'll roast the turkey for a few meals and freeze some of the extra and use the carcass and some of the meat to make soup to freeze for later.

    <3 Barbie in NW WA
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 17,267 Member
    7pfjhwr93q9w.jpeg
  • Katla49
    Katla49 Posts: 10,385 Member
    We have been traveling to Virginia, and now we are in Williamsburg. Our son, DDIL and grand son are here. It is good to see them. From here we take a trip to Atlanta and then Oregon and home.

    Katla
  • dlfk202000
    dlfk202000 Posts: 3,189 Member
    exermom wrote: »
    Peach1948 wrote: »
    Annie ~ I too am anxious about what I will bring to the turkey dinner. And, a lot of it is what to put it in to transfer without having to leave my dishes behind. I will be taking Southern cornbread dressing and gravy and Italian cut green beans cooked with a bit of ham. Strange I know. ;)

    Carol in GA

    What I do many times is I buy a platter/dish at the salvation army, run it through my dishwasher and put the food on that. Then if I leave it, what have I lost $1?

    Michele

    I did that with our dessert auction at church and a few times, they insisted on returning them to me ;)
  • auntiebk
    auntiebk Posts: 2,614 Member
    November: leaner/stronger/kinder than October.
    Accountability:
    Chose well: BP, dogs to powerline, made up Monday’s SWSY.
    Bonus: bank, post office, gas, recycling, veg prep.
    Just one thing:
    24: Share with a friend something helpful you learned recently. Just not doing well with this month’s daily suggestions. Not resonating.

    Lisa praying the procedure went well, gave clear direction for quick, effective treatment. ((hugs))
    Flea ((hugs)) held extra gently.
    Margaret thanks for the tip on dealing with “… I have to check some info…” It never occurred to me that my sympathetic/emotional reaction to what a friend is going through might add another layer. Will tamp down and try instead to listen and just be present.
    Machka what a run around, and having to pay for yet another assessment, ridiculous. They should accept copies of the most recent, but since they don’t… would it be prohibitively expensive for you to simply contract with a housecleaning service yourself? As for the short notice of your inspections, are they quarterly? Could you schedule a deep clean with a service quarterly, then just touch up when you learn of the inspection?
    Heather and Allie safe travels.
    Vicki I had no idea long covid could last a year. Praying your DH can get into that clinic quickly and gets some real help soon.
    Annie sometimes writing things out helps change our perspective.
    Carol your cornbread dressing and green beans with ham don’t sound strange at all! Not sure how people can expect you to bring gravy when you don’t have the turkey drippings ;)
    Karen would love a pic of your turkey shaped dinner rolls ;)
    Barbie what happened to jury duty, I missed it?
    Kim your friendsgiving sounds perfect. Calamari, not so much :sick:
    Katla seems like you just got there. Are you heading home already?

    Struggling to get up off my butt and MOVE tonight. May just bag it. So much for writing it out ;}

    Lighter, lovelies!
    https://us.v-cdn.net/5021879/uploads/editor/5a/f8qt1s098sxm.gif Barbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD
    2021: choose to be leaner/stronger/kinder NOW
  • skuehn48
    skuehn48 Posts: 3,046 Member
    <3
  • cityjaneLondon
    cityjaneLondon Posts: 12,712 Member
    Very restless night. Awake v early. Tried all my tricks to get back to sleep, but no go.
    Oh well.

    Quick pack this morning. I'm taking back my son's shirt that he left behind in the summer. I've washed it, but I'm not ironing it. Otherwise it's mainly toiletries, makeup and chargers. I've downloaded some films, books and music for the journey. Do any of you read Elizabeth Strout? I got a good Black Friday deal on her latest, 'Oh William'.

    No intentional exercise today, but that's OK. It's important I make the effort to go and see him, even if it's only for around 6 hours, or so. It's two years since I last went up there. My first post-covid expedition. :)

    Love to all, Heather UK xxxxxxxx

    Thinking about Julie and Kylia.

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