WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR APRIL 2022

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  • TerriRichardson112
    TerriRichardson112 Posts: 19,007 Member
    edited April 2022
    Thanks for all the birthday wishes. I had a cracker day.

    Just putting the finishing touches to my Latin translation for tomorrow, and making sure I’m ready to get there for 9.30am.

    Allie: I agree with the others. You NEED that time off to avoid burnout!!! Tracy et al are perfectly capable of working it out for themselves. If you get ill they will have to manage.
    Faith: Freshly picked veg/fruit are sooooo good!
    Heather: 💕 the new Norwegian cruise.
    Rebecca: 🥰 Athena is such a personality.

    The last week of the month is usually quite easy, but next week is busy. On Monday, I have to go for my 4th Covid booster at 12.00. Then I have Monday Painters at 14.00.
    On Tues I am having my eyes tested for new glasses at 09.50, then will go to Craft.
    On Thurs we have our U3A Monthly Meeting.
    On Friday I have Latin at 09.30, then a hearing test at 16.00.

    🥳🎉 Cheers to those celebrating.
    Virtual (((hugs))) and 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 for those who need them.
    🙋‍♀️ Miele failte to the newbies.

    ☘️ Terri
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 17,245 Member
    Stats for the day-

    walk w/family- 1hr 35min 48sec, 26elev, 3.13ap, 96mhr, 112mhr, 5.07mi= 414c
    Strava app = 578c
    Zwift home bike trainer- strava stats- 48.32min, 105elev, 67aw, 15.5amph, 113ahr, 139mhr, 12.53mi= 333c
    Strava app = 187c
    Zwift stats- 48.38min, 106elev, 67aw, 59arpm, 12.5mi= 187c

    Total cal 747
  • Anniesquats100
    Anniesquats100 Posts: 3,285 Member
    Well, day two with no candy or cookies, and no pistachios, but I did go out to lunch then eat saltines so I blew my calories again.

    I've been calling about an appointment for my knee but haven't gotten through yet.

    And here I am, not exercising. I need to figure out how to work around my knee.

    Annie in Delaware
  • skuehn48
    skuehn48 Posts: 3,038 Member
    B)
  • okiewoman510
    okiewoman510 Posts: 1,313 Member
    Katla49 wrote: »
    We are having a quiet day so far. I am grateful for quiet time today & time with DH. I just made lime jello for him. It will take time for the jello to become firm.

    I guess your daughter and granddaughter are tired from traveling if you’re having a quiet day with them there. Enjoy your time with them.

    Okie in the TX Hill Country
  • bwcetc
    bwcetc Posts: 2,826 Member
    Kim … hugs… just hugs…

    Beth
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 17,245 Member
    313233
  • Katla49
    Katla49 Posts: 10,385 Member
    Our daughter will be here tomorrow along with her daughter. I haven’t seen my granddaughter since last summer and I’m looking forward to seeing her. I’m hoping for a good visit.
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,592 Member
    GodMomKim wrote: »
    Hi Gals,
    Well I sort of feel like I live in a alternative universe. Some of this you may know, some is limited in details as this is a public forum.
    Warning: there are a lot of triggers in this – I don’t even know how to write a warning but it is pretty awful, no sex, no blood, no pictures.
    In January 2017 my brother told his family, x wife, xstep son(13 years), his son (18 years) (my nephew), his mom(89 years), Me and most of his friends that he was diagnosed with colon rectal cancer, and did 16 weeks of treatment.

    **Note this is the first for me, mom, and nephew to know personally someone with cancer other than a spot or two of skin cancer. So we don’t really know what to expect.

    My family is extremely private. And my mother has enabled my DB (D**** brother ) all of his life. He is an alcoholic, has lived at home, mom has cleaned cooked and financially supported DB and DN(nephew). DB drove himself to the treatments and did not share anything except the facility that he was having treatments. In late 2017 he went back for a follow-up and announced the treatment did not work and he had 4-6 months to live and would not be doing any of the treatments. DB hates everyone in any position of power and did not believe the doctors were competent.

    His employment was all a handyman/plumber/car repair type work all casual labor. He quit working as many hours. And complained a bit about being tired and having pains here and there. He stopped eating certain foods as they bothered him. DB did not die. After a year or so, with no medical information I assumed he was in remission.

    Fast forward to March 2022, DB has been having trouble with his left leg, pain, swelling and he is complaining a lot. But refuses a trip to the Doc, because they are stupid.

    By April 8, 2022, he is in enough pain to ask his friend Tim to take him to ER. All of the beginning of the time I have been working with Tim to figure out what can be done is in previous posts. Tim has a lot of medical knowledge and access to folks in the medical field to translate what he doesn’t know. Tim got DB to sign a DNR (do not reinstate) form. Tim also got permission from DB to be his legal health advocate, so he has access to all of DB’s records. He went through each listing in the on-line health record read all of the notes. And there is no evidence of cancerous tumors anywhere in DB’s body. Tim read all of the results of the blood work and there is no evidence of cancer or chemo. Using every variation of DB name, birthdate, address, and social security number (even transpositions and things like trying both a 3 and an 8 in case someone could not read the handwritten form) there is no record of DB being at a doctor’s office since 2003.

    Although DB is not admitting it he is also not denying it – The cancer diagnosis is/was a fraud. For as best as we can figure out, because he was not getting the attention that he believed he deserved, and he was loosing power over people. His son was 18, his mother/landlord/provider was looking into selling and downsizing.

    The blood clot is the truth and if he will follow the doctors’ orders he probably can live and have a successful life, if not he will die. In the meantime, there is a ton of hurt, anger, feelings of betrayal. This family will never be the same. With Tim’s help I am doing everything we can to keep DN, my mom, and myself physically and mentally safe. There will be a long road ahead. I have no idea how we will do. I am getting counseling. DN is working with his health insurance provider to get help also.

    Kim in N. California

    Is there any way you can completely distance yourself from your family for several months or longer and focus on the good things in your life?

    Machka in Oz


  • OregonMother
    OregonMother Posts: 1,664 Member
    Oh, Kim. As I started reading I was praying what you described was not what you were going to say. I just can't believe it. I have no words. What a horrible, horrible person. I am praying for your whole family. This is just so very sad.

    Flea
    Willamette Valley, OR
  • LisaInArkansas
    LisaInArkansas Posts: 2,878 Member
    I'm so terribly sorry, Kim. So glad you're going to counseling still, as well as your nephew. There are no words for how despicable it is for someone to live this kind of lie for five years. Thinking about you and those you love.

    Lisa in AR
  • teklawa1
    teklawa1 Posts: 678 Member
    (((Kim)))

    Betsy in NW WA
  • Katla49
    Katla49 Posts: 10,385 Member
    (((Kim))) — I am sorry for your family situation and hope for healing for both you and your nephew. ❤️ 🙏🏻
  • skuehn48
    skuehn48 Posts: 3,038 Member
    <3
  • cityjaneLondon
    cityjaneLondon Posts: 12,692 Member
    Kim - Big hugs to you. <3<3<3 I have had contact, through extended family, with these kinds of liars, and they are devastating life wreckers. <3 We normal folk find it hard to get our heads around it.
    I must say, I thought your brother was surviving a very long time after a terminal diagnosis, without appearing to decline, and I suspected such an outcome. He seemed more than capable of such breathtaking duplicity.
    I hope you will be able to bar him from your mother's house, if he does not own a share. There may be a possibility of criminal action, if he has been living on your mother's money. And please be careful of Tim weaving his way into your life. Relying on him is dangerous. Con men are incredibly charming and plausible. DH's family have been directly conned by such people and relieved of considerable sums of money.
    I know you will survive this. You are an amazing woman, with great strength. I admire you. I am so glad your counsellor has been able to help. <3 Your life will never be the same again, but it will be better.
    Love you.

    Heather UK xxxxxxxx
  • cityjaneLondon
    cityjaneLondon Posts: 12,692 Member
    edited April 2022
    For Kim, and all those grieving the life they knew.

    rh1ad7dz7zzl.jpg

    Heather UK xxxxxx
  • TerriRichardson112
    TerriRichardson112 Posts: 19,007 Member
    edited April 2022
    Kim: Holy Cow!!! … 🫂 🫂 🫂 So sorry you are going through this. I have had personal experience of toxic relatives. Best to distance yourself, if possible. Pleased that you are having counselling. Your fortitude will see you through this debacle.

    I underline what Heather says. Tim may not be all that he seems.

    ☘️ Terri 💕💖💕
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,592 Member
    Beautiful afternoon for a ride ....

    m13qjen0dc8m.png
  • KetoneKaren
    KetoneKaren Posts: 6,412 Member
    Kim - no words -
  • ginnytez
    ginnytez Posts: 1,400 Member
    Kim-nothing to add to what others have said. Prayers for all involved.

    Food pantry last night was wonderful. Decent weather, everything went smoothly. Served 130. Numbers are moving back up. When the government officially ends the Public Health Emergency (PHE), the expanded benefits many have received will end. They will then search out other resources. While the government help was good it also had a downside in that people got much more than they were used to receiving and transitioning back will be painful for many.

    Getting second booster today. I am going to a major conference for work in late May and thought it would be good to get extra protection. Two good friends, who have been very careful for the past two years, were just diagnosed with Covid. They got it from their 4 year old granddaughter at her birthday party. They seem to have very mild cases. I believe most of us may well end up with a case-I'm just glad I have missed it so far!

    Since I am leaving work early to get booster, I will stop at store on way home to have some easy things available. I prepare for feeling bad for a couple of days (vaccines tend to do that to me, regardless of type). I took vacation day this past Monday to recover from wedding and off early today-my idea of a work week!

    Take care all,

    Ginny in Ohio
  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 10,085 Member
    Kim-im so glad your family is in counseling..
    For your brother all i can say is someday karma will show its face..
    I had a brother in law like that he lived with his parents ,mom did all the cooking,banking,laundry etc.. he ate at the kitchen table and my poor FIL ate on a tv tray in the living room.. that whole family was disfunctional,glad Tom got out when he did .
    I hope and pray for thr least painful solution for all of you.
    Im up ,dressed and am hoping for a good day with Miles...if gas wasnt so expensive id drive him around all over just to let him sleep poor little guy.
    Even though he is clearly in pain with his teeth Tracy doesnt want to drug him up with tylenol .. ugh to hear him scream in pain hurts my heart...
    Only thing that calms him is nursing
    And that Grandma cant do lol
    Well wish wish me luck today...
  • auntiebk
    auntiebk Posts: 2,610 Member
    Accountability:
    Chose well: Tuesday 4/19: Joe, BP, dogs to powerline, CI<CO, CI<250<CO
    Bonus: packed and mailed kosher goodies, casserole-a-thon
    Just one thing: back to bupkes
    Workin’ on it: Tuesday 144.6!!!, H20x5, active 4:32
    Active April
    20: Focus on ‘eating a rainbow’ of multicolored vegetables today.

    Annie, Have a tiny meniscus tear that causes random instability, so I “brace up” whenever walking outside, at home, not so much. Better a brace than a fall with my osteoporosis. PT starting later this month. Really like this “wrap style” one better than the pull-up kinds, more adjustable. Like the side stabilizers and aggressive Velcro too. ;)https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B09F6X2NB5/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o00_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1


    Pg 50/54 more later.

    Lighter, lovelies!
    Barbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD
    2022: Be still and listen.
    9t3jkbnhrfio.gif
  • KJLaMore
    KJLaMore Posts: 2,847 Member
    Kim- SEnding you hugs, love, and strength! We are with you, in your pocket! <3 KJ
  • LisaInArkansas
    LisaInArkansas Posts: 2,878 Member
    edited April 2022
    Kim - woke up thinking of you and your situation.

    Sat straight up in the bed thinking "What if Tim is lying for him now?" I feel horrible and suspicious, but after your and my conversations over the years, I never thought of your brother as an evil genius, just evil. So, what if his best friend Tim was the genius part of the relationship? What if Tim's medical advice was what helped your brother keep it all straight?

    Probably going to hell due to my suspicious nature, but as more than a few others have said, for your mother and nephew's sake, as well as your own, please keep your antenna up about Tim.

    I know it's hard because I know you are completely exhausted from all this. I know your whole family is exhausted. Does your mother finally understand who your brother is and what he's done to her and to all of you through these lies? I have a bad feeling she's just refusing to hear anything that puts your brother in a bad light.

    Hang in, dear heart. I know it's insanely early your time, but please don't hesitate to call if you need to talk.

    Love,
    Lisa in AR
  • auntiebk
    auntiebk Posts: 2,610 Member
    edited April 2022
    Accountability:
    Chose well: Wednesday 4/20: Joe, BP,
    Bonus: massage
    Just one thing: back to bupkes
    Workin’ on it: Wednesday 142.6, H20x4, active 2:47
    Active April
    21: Regularly pause to stretch and breathe throughout the day.

    Belated welcome @marty102a ! Would you let us know what you’d like to be called and your general locale?

    Pg 52/54 so close I can almost taste it.... ;)
    Lighter, lovelies!
    Barbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD
    2022: Be still and listen.
    9t3jkbnhrfio.gif
  • auntiebk
    auntiebk Posts: 2,610 Member
    Accountability:
    Chose well: Thursday 4/21 Joe, BP, dogs to powerline, CI<CO, CI<250<CO
    Bonus: dogs to Crissey Field, chiro, Grocery Outlet, one batch hummingbird nectar
    Just one thing: back to bupkes
    Workin’ on it: Thursday 143.5!!!, H20x4, active 3:24
    Active April
    22: Enjoy moving to your favorite music. Really go for it.

    Kim, words fail. (hugs) held extra long and Brava for getting counseling. Echo others’ cautions about Tim. Your brother might have attracted a friend with a similar disregard for the truth and the resources of others. Has your brother confessed/acknowledged? Has any independent source (Dr or Hospital) confirmed or denied? (Hard with HIPA.) Ditto Lisa’s concerns about your mother’s reaction to this new information.

    Finally caught up to pg 54.

    Lighter, lovelies!
    Barbara, the Southern Oregon Coastie AHMOD
    2022: Be still and listen.
    9t3jkbnhrfio.gif
  • TerriRichardson112
    TerriRichardson112 Posts: 19,007 Member
    Lisa: I’m in your cynical, suspicious gang. My grandmother drummed it into us that if it seemed too good to be true, it usually was!!!