WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR APRIL 2022
Replies
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Katla I'm sorry you feel disrespected. I'm going through a turnover of responsibilities with my mother, and I'm sure I've been overeager to take charge in some areas (like decisions for cooking) and lax in others (like dishes). It's a compromise and a gradual shift and the timing is not going to be perfect on both sides. This may or may not be relevant at all, but maybe the thought will be soothing. Whatever the issue, I hope you can talk it out.
I am taking my parents to the doctor soon for a checkup. I have to get my mother used to the idea that she has a memory assessment in July. I know she hates the idea but she is showing signs of dementia, and we need a baseline. And also we need to evaluate for depression. She likes to pretend she is very healthy for her age, and that may be shattered if the diagnosis is Alzheimer's. It's a tricky subject for us. We tiptoe around it.
Annie in Delaware
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I also looked out at the Road Scholar program prices it has been a long time since I had. Most of the pricing is high compared to what I remember. I am so use to camping for a night or two, and maybe spending $30-$40 plus food money for a vacation. Maybe that will always just be a day dream. Although I did think it was interesting to see what they were doing closest to me... I might be able to create some day trips that included the same sites.
Kim in N. California4 -
I have a question for the technical among us - Windows 11 upgrade --- should I do it? will it have any problems with my USB to floppy external drive?
Kim in N. California0 -
Virgin rang DH this afternoon for a chat on what they could do better!!! At the end they added another £50 to his account.
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx6 -
Wow Heather - DH did a great job!!!0
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If you were given the opportunity to acquire a new qualification of some sort, what would you choose?
Love that sentiment Heather! Learn something new every day! I really do try, even simply a new "thought".
I'd like to learn another language. I know that's rather simple, but I'd really like to become REALLY fluent. I've thought about Spanish simply because it's so prevalent and I learned French in HS and traveled to France after HS. Romance languages are so similar so it wouldn't be hard. And we have Mexican neighbors so I know they would love help me and LOVE to correct me. LOL. They're just wonderful already and they'd love to know that I'm really trying something new. Who knows...
WOOHOO Allie! So excited for you and your new mattress! (and slightly jealous)
MACHKA! That Boomer thing is HILARIOUS! Don't know about "boomer" though. A lot of those songs seem to be much later than the baby boomer generation. But I know and love them all.
Katla, I'm so sorry. Disrespect is so hard to deal with. Been there. I think we all have. Glad you spoke to her though. That's one of the hardest things to do.
Nothing much new here. Back to work Monday. Can't believe it's May next week!
Carla, in MN1 -
For all you ladies that aren't getting your point across to your loved ones:
Just
"say what what you mean, and mean what you say"
If you can't be frank with the people you love, who can you be frank with?
Rebecca
Whidbey
Wa
Another cool photo:
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Barbara - There is Hebrew on Duolingo, and, of course, Spanish, Carla. It's so easy to learn a language these days. I listen to Easy Spanish, Easy German and Easy French. There are so many different videos for every language, and films and TV programmes on Netflix, with a choice of subtitles. I use English ones for German and French ones for French.
I have restarted Norwegian on Duolingo and I know there are many other resources online.
My method is little and often.
You could learn the guitar, piano etc. It's all there.
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx1 -
Allie--Sounds like a good plan.
Kim--Prayers and hugs, lots of each.
Lisa--Glad to hear you are slowly stepping back into life.
Allie--We looked at adjustable beds and found out only king size can have each side separate, as we each could do what is comfortable, and our room is not big enough for a king size bed. That is about all I know about them.
Viv--Welcome back and I do remember you. Glad your mom was not hurt. Falling is such a worry anymore. I noticed this weekend my balance was way off and if not for DH I would of been on the ground more than once
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Katla--Sorry to hear you had a difficult conversation with you daughter and son. Maybe try again another day??
Heather--Great results from DH's email. Sometimes it pays to be the squeaky wheel. Thursday we had new gutters pton the house. First they showed up 4 hour ealier than scheduled and no one was home. They called me and said they needed to plug into power and would ask my neighbors if they could use theirs. I said you will not. I called a friend to go over and open our garage door so they could plug in and when she got there they were plugged into the the neighbors. I was pissed and when I got home in the middle of them putting up the new ones I told them I was cancelling the job and to put the old ones back. The guy said they had already cut them up, not my problem. I went in the house. Acouple minutes later a guy from the head office called me. I explained why I was so mad and he kept saying what can I do at this point. So I said what are you willing to do. These are new neighbors. So they ended up taking $500 off and ordering acouple large pizza's for the neighbors. After they were all done DH went over and talked to them and they were fine. But I was pissed and they knew it.
I am also a side sleeper and have one of those knee pillows between my knees. I think I would like to try the leg one that Mackla shared the link to, but they said soonest shipping date is Aug 1,so will look around here and see if I can find one.
I too looked at the roadscholar and will just be dreaming with the rest of you.
We did get about half inch of rain last Thursday night, but need so much more. So much wind and damage and now lots of fires. Have had 2 fireman killed and several others hurt fighting fires in the state.
Blessings, Vicki GRAND ISLAND, NE where last Thursday and Friday had the AC on and not back to heat.5 -
Vicki - Excellent job there! :drinker:
I've always had great success with complaining about restaurant meals and getting free meals, sometimes posh ones. DH's best success, and he has had quite a few, was with getting an upgrade and replacement for our cross trainer. Worth thousands! Plus a personal delivery service! He also managed a huge discount for years on our phone line. You should always go straight to the top. He writes a brilliant letter.
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx
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Katla ... I missed your post where you said you felt disrespected by your children. Your comment made me think about how my brother and I have been dealing with my elderly parents (age 93 and 91) the last couple of months. I have been angry with my brother more than once on how he has handled situations as they relate to my parents, but in his defense, he has only wanted to "fix" problems. Perhaps your children, in an effort to see you and your husband well taken care of, have been insensitive to your thoughts and your feelings. They've moved too quickly or instituted changes that are hard to get used to. Conversations that let your children know that you've felt disrespected or your opinions have been ignored, are important. I am certain they have your best interests at heart, but you may need to remind them that words matter and how those words are said matter too.
Beth6 -
Had a difficult conversation with my daughter. I am not feeling respected by her or my son. 😢
I am so sorry-
I feel I need to have a conversation with my mom but not quite yet, need to calm down a bit-
My sister told me yesterday that mom told her she didn't want me to go up and get started planting in the greenhouse when I did, she wasn't ready but I went ahead and did it anyways.
Problem with that is, mom never told me she wasn't ready(even though it was a month later or more, from when it should have been started). She acted like she really appreciated the help but now, hearing from my sister, she is irritated that I did it. Sister said, oh, mom didn't want to hurt your feelings, well, feelings are a lot more hurt now than if she had something. If she didn't want my friend and I to get started, fine, we could have spent that whole weekend visiting and not working our butts off. Or, I could have stayed home and do some things around here. I told my friend, next year, if I get the urge to help get it started, remind me not to. If the garden goes in two or three months late and it doesn't produce(that is what happened last year), it is on her. Both years I went up thinking I was helping, just to hear from my sisters(last year the other sister told me what mom told her) that she was upset with what I did. I am the only one of the three of us that was there to help and this is what I get.
Mom is still focused on weeding around and in the raised beds but not about the stuff in the green house that needs to grow so it can get put in those raised bed.
Sorry for venting -just irritated- Will wait a few days before calling mom or wait until I go up in two weeks for a memorial service for a friend.
Debbie3 -
MACHKA ~ I liked your post about the Boomers. I fit right in there.
TERRI ~ That was a very nice poem to read on a Monday.
KATLA ~ It seems that your son and daughter are saying things that you aren't ready to hear or deal with. I know they mean well and I hope you will let them know how you feel. My son is very blunt and I'm sure at some point he will say things neither I nor my husband want to hear.
VICKI & HEATHER's HUSBAND ~ Yeah for standing up for yourself. I personally wish I could do that.
I bought a new washer and dryer today. Both my old washer and dryer have been acting up. I am almost positive I paid too much as I only do about two loads a week. Anyway, here's hoping for the best.
Carol in GA6 -
Katla ... I missed your post where you said you felt disrespected by your children. Your comment made me think about how my brother and I have been dealing with my elderly parents (age 93 and 91) the last couple of months. I have been angry with my brother more than once on how he has handled situations as they relate to my parents, but in his defense, he has only wanted to "fix" problems. Perhaps your children, in an effort to see you and your husband well taken care of, have been insensitive to your thoughts and your feelings. They've moved too quickly or instituted changes that are hard to get used to. Conversations that let your children know that you've felt disrespected or your opinions have been ignored, are important. I am certain they have your best interests at heart, but you may need to remind them that words matter and how those words are said matter too.
Beth
Thank you for writing this- I need to remember this when I am trying to "fix" things for her. Trying to do it the way it used to be, when dad was alive. I am not up there all the time so don't see all she is dealing with, just see that she isn't doing it the way dad did(they did together)3 -
Stats for the day-
Walk w/family- 2hrs 21min 32sec, 97ahr, 120mhr, 142elev, 3.27ap, 8.36mi= 700c
Strava app = 952c
Other- eat 41min, brush, wash, dry and brush again, yogi, 97ahr= 180c
Total cal 880
While on our walk I got a call from the hospital to see how I was doing. That was nice, it was from the hospital, not the doctor, that was a first for me7 -
DH has an appointment with a doctor quite a distance from home. We know the doctor is well regarded. We hope to get to his office on time. We are looking forward to a good outcome.4
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I decided that the best thing about being old and retired is I can sit on my front porch (which overlooks a busy by street) in a rocking chair and drink a glass of wine enjoying the traffic for all those going home at the end of the day.
Carol in GA10 -
I sleep on my back with 2-4 pillows under my head, and another under my knees. I read propped up for a short while (4 pillows) then slide down the bed and spread the pillows out until I feel comfortable.
Had a good afternoon at M Painters. Had booster before lunch. No I’ll effects except a twingy arm where the needle went in. It was a half dose of Moderna, but I’m happy with that.
Tomorrow I get my eyes tested then going to craft before lunch.
🥳🎉 Cheers to those celebrating.
Virtual (((hugs))) and 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 for those who need them.
🙋♀️ Miele failte to the newbies.
☘️ Terri3 -
worked out in the garden pulling out Bermuda grass, ivy and what ever other weeds were up there. First time pulling any weeds up there since fall. Some of the pots/raised beds the soil is still nice and workable, others, well, not so much. More like hard clay- not sure why the difference.
Worked out there for two hours- now have two of the large yard waste containers full. Not completely done but about 80% done or a bit more. Guys are going to get a truck load of composted fertilizer for me so I can get that worked in and get some planting started.
Has been great not having the daycare girl here.
Zumba tonight so a total of three hours of hard workout for me today- that hasn't happened in a LONG time, like last spring and even then don't think I did two full hours of hard weeding.
Should sleep good tonight.
Debbie
Napa Valley Ca3 -
My mom's blood pressure is way down. Yay! That was more than I hoped for. We had a good doctor visit today.
Not so good for my diet.
Annie in Delaware7 -
We made it to the right hospital and DH is getting medical treatment now. Our daughter is with him & the doctor. I hope all goes well. 🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻9
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Oh Boy Katla- hope all is well and that you take to heart what your kids are talking about.. i tried talking with my dad about things and all of it came a bit to late for him.. that is why i want to have everything all set for my kids medically and paperwork wise so they know what is needed.. good luck and will be thinking of you all. Xoxox2
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Hi, Katla. I'm sorry you felt disrespected. I'm sure I've made my mother feel like that over the past few months.
So here's the daughter's perspective: My mother is elderly and set in her ways. If I (and my niece, as well) hadn't stepped in, she wouldn't be eating. She wouldn't have a clean house. She wouldn't have gone to the doctor to find out that she has lung cancer. She still hasn't made the appointment with the neurologist to find out if she has Parkinson's (pretty sure she has), so I keep gently reminding, but I am sure I am getting to be annoying about it.
Your children live far from you and don't see you day to day. When you are around someone day to day, as you are with your husband and your husband is with you, subtle changes can be missed. But when someone who loves you swoops in for a visit, after many months or years, they notice the changes because for them, they can seem drastic and very concerning.
Try to accept the care that your children are trying to give you and your husband. They love you and want to see you both safe and cared for.
Please keep us posted. We love you too, and want to see you safe and cared for.
Flea
Willamette Valley, OR11 -
Worked today then cut the grass. We have a group of trees on our property so I raked up the leaves and twigs, then put down paver sand. I thought it would take longer to put the sand down. Guess I did a pretty good job last year. Had to go to Lowe’s for more sand since we didn’t have enough.
Viv – welcome back. I’m still at the Green Room (community theater) in the box office. Sometimes I ushered, but I haven’t in a long time
Games – who remembers double dutch, doing the Limbo, pick up sticks, jacks, Mother May I, of course hopscotch,
Came back from ceramics. My smurfette was fired but she cracked and some of the paint chipped off. So I repainted that spot and put clear glaze on the crack hoping that’ll seep into the crack and fill it in. Put it back in to be fired so we shall see how it turns out
Beth – I hope the doctor gives you good news
katla – I’m so sorry about your daughter and son. Best wishes for your dh
Anne DE – yea for lower bp!!!
Time for bed
Carol GA – I have a hard time standing up for myself, too
Michele NC0 -
Barbara All my pillow are ancient but not foam or down.
I listen to podcasts about happiness, meditation, and food along with "Omnibus" that covers all sorts of obscure topics. They improve my outlook on life and add to my collection of miscellaneous information and make me a better "Jeopardy" player. Earlier today I listened to a podcast about Manchego cheese that comes from the La Mancha region of Spain and it inspired me to look on YouTube for the songs from the musical "Man of La Mancha">
Tomorrow is my yearly mammogram.
Katla, sorry you are having trouble with your kids.
Barbie in NW WA1 -
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