WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR MAY 2023

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  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,180 Member
    edited May 2023
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    SophieRosieMom wrote: »
    Ladies!

    Interesting afternoon. As I mentioned earlier, I was searching for DH's drum purchase & info records. No luck. Then it hit me - maybe it's on his PC in the office. By some miracle, I was able to finally put together the password to get into it. He'd given me the first part, and that's what I wrote down years ago, but he since amended it a little. I engaged the "DH part of my brain" and came up with it after about ten minutes :p

    Didn't find what I hoped for regarding many drum records, but he had a lot of photos and other things I moved onto a thumb drive. I was hoping I could open my excel budget spreadsheet records on that PC, but no go. It's running Windows 7. My laptop is Windows 9. I might download Open Office if it's still available and give that a try. Just as a back up of last resort. I keep a lot of documents in that file that I would not want to lose access to, and I've heard in new PC's, we're not able to have Word and Excel resident on the machines, everything is in the cloud at a price. Bugger that. I want to keep my stuff local.

    Lanette B)
    SW WA State

    Not true.

    The latest version of Microsoft Office 365 is on a subscription bases ... basically we rent it, we don't own it.

    However, our files are ours. Our files are on our computers, or on our backup harddrives or if we opt to use the cloud, they're on Google Drive or One Drive, or whatever cloud service you decide to use.

    I have all my files, and many of my husband's files, backed up onto backup harddrives.


    I hope we ALL here have our files backed up onto backup harddrives!!


    When we travel, I often take one of my backup harddrives and lock it up away from the house, just in case something happens to the house.



    Regarding money ...

    Neither my husband nor I ask each other for money. That's such a foreign concept to me.

    If one of us wants to buy something relatively inexpensive, we buy it.

    If one of us wants to buy something expensive, we have a discussion about it and decide if it is something we really need.

    For example, during the COVID shutdown, I took over the dining room table as part of my home office. It's a smallish table - would seat 4. But it holds my second monitor and other computer stuff nicely.

    So we started eating off a folding camping table. When it became evident that I was going to keep my home office in the dining room, I thought it might be nice to have a better table than the folding camping table, and I wanted a certain style.

    I talked about it with my husband, he liked the idea, and we started looking. Not long later, we found an antique table, just like I had in mind, but it was about $130! So we talked about it again and agreed to get it.

    But if I find some used books somewhere when I'm out at lunch, I'll just get them.



    M in Oz
  • LisaInArkansas
    LisaInArkansas Posts: 2,530 Member
    edited May 2023
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    Machka9 wrote: »

    Regarding money ...

    Neither my husband nor I ask each other for money. That's such a foreign concept to me. If one of us wants to buy something relatively inexpensive, we buy it. If one of us wants to buy something expensive, we have a discussion about it and decide if it is something we really need.

    M in Oz

    Haven't said much about it, but yeah, that's pretty much the way things work for us and always have. I take the lead in terms of dealing with the everyday finances, which is a hangover from before we married. Bluntly, he was in a financial quagmire when we met--largely due to his ex-wife's shenanigans. Luckily I didn't find that out until I was already in love with him! Took a few years, but after we got married, we got everything settled and on an even keel. We've never had separate checking accounts, both have access to everything all along.

    Since then, I just deal with the day-to-day because we both prefer I do it. He's not a detail guy, and I am very much so. I keep him abreast of where we are with it. Neither one of us is a spender--he makes his own lunch every morning to take to work, and feels guilty if he actually decides to get a burger. He makes sure to tell me if he does... so funny.

    I try to keep a little bit of cash in the change drawer so if either of us wants to buy a gift for the other and not show up on the credit card, we can, but other than that, we operate on a credit card that I pay off twice or three times a month. It gains cash points that we use to buy Kindle books on Amazon, mostly--it's not that much. I keep another card that all the standing bills go on, most of the utilities and the phone, also earns cash points, but fewer. Paid off regularly as well--haven't paid credit card interest in many, many years.

  • 1948CWB
    1948CWB Posts: 1,366 Member
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    Spending ~ We each have our own bank accounts at different banks, but, each account has access to either of us. We spent so many years living pay check to pay check that I have become very frugile and love to save as much as I can. I have a great fear about being destitute in my old age even though at almost 75 I guess I am somwhat in old age. LOL :)

    Katla ~ Sorry your bed is troubling your sleep!

    Michele and Rebecca ~ My two grands live only 40 minutes away but I still feel like I get to see them very little. They are getting older and always on the go participating in sports and social activities. I try to attend some of their sports games and we do get together with the family on holidays/birthdays. Still, I miss them.

    Flea ~ Hugs!

    Carol in GA



  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,180 Member
    edited May 2023
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    LisaInArkansas wrote: »
    Machka9 wrote: »

    Regarding money ...

    Neither my husband nor I ask each other for money. That's such a foreign concept to me. If one of us wants to buy something relatively inexpensive, we buy it. If one of us wants to buy something expensive, we have a discussion about it and decide if it is something we really need.

    M in Oz

    Haven't said much about it, but yeah, that's pretty much the way things work for us and always have. I take the lead in terms of dealing with the everyday finances, which is a hangover from before we married. Bluntly, he was in a financial quagmire when we met--largely due to his ex-wife's shenanigans. Luckily I didn't find that out until I was already in love with him! Took a few years, but after we got married, we got everything settled and on an even keel. We've never had separate checking accounts, both have access to everything all along.

    Since then, I just deal with the day-to-day because we both prefer I do it. He's not a detail guy, and I am very much so. I keep him abreast of where we are with it. Neither one of us is a spender--he makes his own lunch every morning to take to work, and feels guilty if he actually decides to get a burger. He makes sure to tell me if he does... so funny.

    I try to keep a little bit of cash in the change drawer so if either of us wants to buy a gift for the other and not show up on the credit card, we can, but other than that, we operate on a credit card that I pay off twice or three times a month. It gains cash points that we use to buy Kindle books on Amazon, mostly--it's not that much. I keep another card that all the standing bills go on, most of the utilities and the phone, also earns cash points, but fewer. Paid off regularly as well--haven't paid credit card interest in many, many years.

    Yep, pretty much the same thing with us. Everything is paid off and neither of us are really big spenders because there isn't much that we need. :)

    My at-work food comes from our groceries too, except for occasional lunches out with the ladies I used to work with, maybe 4 times a year. I always tell my husband about those too :) He just asks me what I had, and if I'm hungry for dinner or would prefer soup.

    M in Oz
  • pipcd34
    pipcd34 Posts: 16,712 Member
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    163163
  • SophieRosieMom
    SophieRosieMom Posts: 3,423 Member
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    Good morning ladies!

    Lisa - Corey's recipe for ground beef and rice really sounds good. Lately I've been staring into the fridge and freezer, I'm hungry but nothing looks good and even heading out for a carry out pizza or burger doesn't appeal and there's the $$. A few weeks ago I picked up halibut and chips at the local diner - I had a gift card. $21 and I'm glad I didn't have to pay for it.

    Yesterday I browned some turkey burger and added a little taco seasoning - the whole time I was thinking of your meals and getting in good protein. Safeway had the buy one package of Jennie-O ground turkey get one free deal so I stocked the freezer.

    Hope your GI system is doing better today.

    Machka - you are right, I see I can still buy a home/office verson of MS office for $149 on Amazon and download it on DH's old PC. PC's are becoming very affordable, think I'll wait put it toward a new laptop. Subscribing to Office 365 isn't worth the cost for me and my limited usage, and I keep the backups current.

    Flea - so sorry to hear you went through all of that. I too wonder how Kylia is doing these days.

    Beth - I was happy to hear the warrior chicken is alive and well. :) How's the house re-siding coming along - has the tenant been evicted?

    Rabbit update - something removed it from out by the road last night. I peeked into the woodshed, it wasn't re-deposited. Raccoon? Possum? Coyote? My cleaner, who lives 2 miles down the road, had a bear in her back yard going after her chicken feed last week. Didn't bother the chickens. There's quite a nightlife that goes on when we sleep. :o

    Chilly day here, heat just came on. High of around 60 today, lows in the 40's. Tomatoes and hot weather crops are now officially in suspended animation, lol. Weeds are doing fine. :D

    Have a wonderful week!

    Lanette B)
    SW WA State


  • fanncy0626
    fanncy0626 Posts: 7,152 Member
    edited May 2023
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    I told you ladies about the issue we were having with our caretaker. We did end up terminating her in that position. However, she continues to violate our lease agreement. She has three months left on her lease. My question for everyone here is, should I go to court to evict her or give her a second chance as a renter. In the spoiler below is a lot of information. Feel free to skip it if you want. I wish I could skip the whole thing and not have to deal with this!
    Notice of Termination of Caretaker Position


    One of the responsibilities of the caretaker is to represent the landlords in their absence. The caretaker is responsible for recruiting applicants to fill vacant units. They must conduct business in a professional manner and not discriminate or make personal judgments when screening applicants for a rental unit. Their duties would include; hosting an open house, showing vacant rentals, give copy of rental application to prospective tenants, screen applicants without bias or discrimination, submit paperwork for a background check, go over the information on the lease agreement and discuss tenant expectations, do a walk-through with tenants prior to having them move in, and give them the keys to the unit. As a tenant themselves they must uphold all requirements of their own lease agreement because they are the standard of which the other tenants are expected to follow. They will be expected to confront other tenants if they have knowledge of the tenant being in violation of their lease. They will need to enforce all requirements of the lease that the tenant must adhere to. Such as; maintaining the lawn and gardens, enforcing the pet policy, enforcing the monthly 72 hour guest policy, removal of snow from steps and deck, reporting repairs that other tenants may need taken care of. It is the caretaker’s responsibility to report back to the landlords, if any tenant is in violation of any portion of their lease agreement. The caretaker/tenant is the eyes and ears of the landlords in their absence.

    1. The first job that our caretaker had to perform was to clean and hold an open house for the cabin that was vacated during the middle of October, 2022. She needed to host an open house, give rental application to interested people and answer any questions that might arise. There was a possible renter that was very interested in renting the cabin. We personally knew of him through his employer. His employer gave us a very favorable verbal recommendation for his character and his employment history. We informed our caretaker that we thought that he would be a good choice, but to conduct the open house and take applications from all people that were interested. Of the people that did show up no one submitted a rental application. The following information is our recollection of the text messages and conversations we had with our caretaker. (I accidentally left my phone with the actual text messages in Arizona). Our caretaker did not want this particular applicant to rent. She stated that she thought he had been drinking when he came to the open house. She did not give him a rental application to fill out. According to the applicant, she was very short and rude to him. We had to send a copy of the rental application to his employer’s email. We were informed by the applicant that our caretaker was friends with his ex-wife. Our caretaker said something to the effect that she thought he was creepy and would prefer not renting to him. Mary told her that would be against the law. We need to judge each applicant on their merit. His employer emailed us his application and we reviewed it as well as had a conversation with the applicant. We decided to accept this applicant as our renter. If we would not have accepted him, our rental unit would have been vacant, and we would have lost rental income. We told our caretaker that we would deal with him since she obviously did not want to. We ended up filling out the lease agreement with him in Arizona while he was there on vacation. Our caretaker not wanting to have contact with him did not do the required, walk-through, and we had her leave his set of keys on the electric meter outside of the residence.

    2. The major responsibility during the winter time for our caretaker was to inspect the roof line. The reason that this was of importance is that we had ice dam damage for the two years prior to hiring her as a live-in caretaker. If during the roof line inspection, there was any excessive snow, ice buildup, or icicles we could take care of this issue by having our roof snow removal person, Dane, rake off the excessive snow and or place ice melting pucks on the roof. On January 4, 2023 our caretaker, informed us of excess snow on the roof and did send us pictures of the roof on January 7, 2023. We had Dane come and rake the roof. After that incident we had no more communication about excessive snow from our caretaker. Three months later at 10 AM on April 5, 2023 our caretaker sent pictures of water leaking in the living room to John. John contacted Dane and he came out to inspect the roof. John told him to check the northeast corner of the house since water was leaking into the living room. Dane reported that the ice was 16 inches thick and 30 inches long. This resulted in the formation of an ice dam and water leaking through the living room ceiling. The monetary amount for the damage and repairs will be assessed on Friday May 19, 2023.

    3. It was the responsibility of the caretaker/tenant to remove all snow from the deck on the back of the house as stated in the lease. This also was not done until the caretaker sent us pictures on January 7, 2023 showing us how much snow was on the roof. The picture also revealed that there was one and a half to two feet deep of snow on the deck. It was at that time that the caretaker/tenant was reminded that, snow removal of the deck was part of the lease agreement, and that the snow needed to be removed as soon as possible to maintain the integrity of the deck. She sent a picture on January 9, 2023 of approximately 1/3 of the snow left on the deck stating that it would have to wait until it warmed up because there was too much ice.

    4. As stated in the lease, there is a no pet policy. On December 21, 2022 the caretaker/tenant asked about having an animal. At that time John called and told her no, and explained how the prior damage from past tenant’s animals made having a pet not an option. On May 10, 2023 the caretaker/tenant informed us that she had a small dog staying in the house. She was told to find a boarding facility ASAP, and that having the dog there was in violation of the lease agreement.

    5. According to the lease, the caretaker/tenant has a guest policy that states, guests cannot stay longer then 72 hours without written permission from the landlord. On May 10, 2023 the caretaker/tenant informed us that she had her niece and her small dog staying with her. When she was asked in a text as to how long the niece and dog had been there, she did not answer. We had to ask one of our neighbors how long the guest and dog was there. We were informed that they had been there at least a week and a half.

    6. We expect our caretaker/employee to act in a professional manner. We consider us as her employer, and she is our employee. On May 10, 2023 she informed us that she had her niece and a small dog staying with her. Mary responded and told her to put the dog in a boarding facility ASAP. She also told her that she was in violation of the lease. As her employer, Mary made other comments about losing trust in her. She responded to us that the writing of the text was disrespectful to her. Mary asked her to tell us how long her niece had been there. Instead of answering the direct question with the time frame, she wrote a two sentence statement stating she was busy and would call later. When Mary informed her that we had found out that they were there for a week and a half, she accused us of having someone watching her. She later told us it was rude for us to ask someone, about the length of time her niece and animal were there. She sent a text to us informing us that her niece had made other living arrangements. She stated it was a simple fix and not the major freak out. We wrote a text, on May 14, 2023 informing her that we were going to do an inspection of the property for damage an animal could cause as well as to assess the damage of the ice dam. She did not respond to us. On May 16, 2023 we sent another text with a time change for the inspection. We informed her at that time that we needed her to respond. She did comply with responding to us. However, she had the expectation that her brother could accompany her during an employer-caretaker meeting and inspection for the animal violation and possible damage. She stated that he would be of comfort to her. She informed us that he would also be presenting us with a bill for plowing services. We informed her that we did not have a written or verbal contract with him for plowing services. She also stated that he was present when we discussed things. To date, Mary has never met him, and only dealt with her during the hiring process. John had only talked to him briefly when he was helping her move furniture into the house. At that time John remembered her brother volunteering to plow the driveway and remove snow from the roof if needed. John told him we have already talked to turf tech about snow plowing. He said, he wanted to do it to take care of his sister.

    Due to the lease violations and your failure to perform the caretaker duties to expected standards we feel that we lost trust in you as our caretaker and tenant. Your job as our caretaker has been terminated as of May 18, 2023. Please return all keys except the ones for your personal rental unit.

    You can choose to stop renting immediately or pay us the full price of $1400 a month, and continue to rent until August 31, 2023. At that time we will determine if you are able to stay on as a tenant. You can submit your request to renew the lease by July 29, 2023. Rent to own option will still be honored.

    The following was also noticed during our meeting with her. She also is in violation of the lease for leaving two huge piles of yard debris since September 14, which she has not picked up to date.

    The paint that we had you pick up as our caretaker in September is completely ruined according to the owner at the hardware store. Not only that, you received a rent reduction as our caretaker of $300 a month which was figured to be an agreed amount of $15 per hour for wages. You were given the job of painting the underside of the overhang of the garage which you did not do. We will be deducting the cost of the paint, the cost of the time that it takes me to prep for painting, painting the overhang, and cleaning up after painting. This charge will come out of your damage deposit, as any other reason allowed by law, per your lease agreement.

    💕 Mary from Minnesota/Arizona
  • LisaInArkansas
    LisaInArkansas Posts: 2,530 Member
    edited May 2023
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    Lanette - Yep, still protein-forward on food. The doc that did my gastric bypass explained that, when you're losing weight, your body will start sapping protein from every muscle in your whole body to survive what it feels like is a famine - and your heart is a muscle. That muscle loss across the board is genuinely something to consider for anyone losing weight. Because of my iron needs, I also tend to eat beef because it has more than double the iron of turkey. Pork, on the other hand, has less iron, less protein, more fat and calories than turkey. Plus I don't like it much.

    My mother used to make burritos with just ground turkey and a jar of mild salsa--it is simple, tastes good, and protein-forward. Also a comforting memory for me. Part of our move to Ro-tel (generic is much cheaper) is that the sodium is significantly lower than in salsa. Corey already makes his own salsa and cans it with no added salt, but I can't handle that spice. Eventually, we'll learn to make Ro-tel from scratch - it's largely just diced tomatoes and green chilis, but that distinctive flavor is addictive.

  • Joy1580vb
    Joy1580vb Posts: 338 Member
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    Machka absolutely stunning yard. It shows that you take a lot of time and pride in it. Beautiful.

    Mary if I’m reading this right, she has 3 months left on her lease. I would give her a second chance although probably nothing will change then get rid of this nightmare when the lease is up. I don’t think it will be worth it to take her to court with only 3 months left.

    Thunder and lightning last night but no rain. Supposed to be raining later today. Hopefully that will happen. Over 2 million acres has been burned in Alberta. No wonder so many are feeling the smoke.

    Joy
  • myvt9v4crh
    myvt9v4crh Posts: 391 Member
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    <3

    Katla in Illinois
  • kevrit
    kevrit Posts: 3,956 Member
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    2023 Mindful May

    Word of the year: Appreciate : today I appreciate my iPad.


    Exercise goals added
    Yoga 10 mins 3 times a week 1/15 100%,100%,80%,73%)
    Walk 7,000 every day 8/31 (84%,86%,94%,93%)
    6 min HIIT -1x a day start April 1- 0/31 (93%)
    Arm weights twice a week 0/10 (100%, 60%hurt my elbow, hurt my shoulder 30%,50%)
    Meditation: daily. 13/31 (82%(started Feb)94%,100%)

    Feeling overwhelmed this month. Taking a break from the list above until I feel more in control.


    1. cut back drinking and limit to 2 days a week. 8/8–(100%,100%,0%,0)
    2. Average 7,000 steps a week. 10818, 8171, 8856, (7,700,100%-9851,100%—9526,100%—-9,559,100%)
    3. Update budget every 2 weeks 1/2 —(100%,100%,100%,100%)
    4. Contact close family every week (4x) 59/208/ —(100%,100%,100%,50%should be 86 by June1)
    5. Contact Donat and sibs once a month (8x)40/94 (100%,100%,100%,100%)
    6. Weigh less last day of month compared to first until I reach 140. Start at 178.6,176,174.2,173.4,175.4 (100%,100%,100%,0%)
    7. Develop a journaling practice by aiming to journal at least 5 days a week. 16/15 (100%,88%,100,100)
    8. Read 12 books at least this year. 19/12 (100%,100%,100%,100%)
    9. Pay off credit card debt by January 2024 by making monthly payments to NDR——4/12—(100%.100%,100%,100%,100%)
    10. Continue building emergency fund at SLFCU (min$25 a month)$25+$25+$71+700+25+25 )(100%,100%,100%,100%,100%)
    11. April started putting 4% on income in savings. 700,200 (100%)

    January Met —100%
    February met —-90%
    March met met —-90%
    April met——86.36%
    May met
    June met
    July met — met
    August met
    September met
    October met —
    November met—
    December met—



    1. Do something kind for someone you really care about. I need to think about this and plot! I gave my son a gift card to Netflix. He needed something to make him smile.
    2. Focus on what you can do instead of what you can’t. I will try. Did this.
    3. Take a step toward an important goal no matter how small. I have to think about this. I did not buy beer today. Working on not enabling my DH.
    4. Send a friend a photo of a time you enjoyed together. DONE!
    5. Let someone know how much they mean to you and why. It’s my brother’s 59’th birthday today. Going to call him. We never really call each other.
    6. Look for people doing good and reasons to be cheerful. Will do! And found them all over all day!
    7. Make a list of what matters most to you and why. Did this in my journal.
    8. Set yourself a kindness mission and help others today. Do this every day
    9. What values are important to you? Find ways to use them today. Will try.
    10. Be grateful for the little things, even in difficult times. It is hard right now but trying.
    11. Look around for things that give you a sense of awe and wonder. There is plenty here at the park. Wondering how a cave could turn into a lake.
    12. Listen to a favorite pieces of music and remember what it means to you. I will try to remember to do this. Did not have time.
    13. Find out about the values or traditions of another country. Sounds like fun! I looked up Canada and specialty Quebec where my family originated.
    14. Get outside and notice the beauty in nature. I love doing this!
    15. Do something to contribute to your local community. Helped a homeless man today.
    16. Show your gratitude to people who are helping to make things better. Will watch for this. Did this to school group’s surprise visit to the park.
    17. Find a way to make what you do today meaningful. I try every day by helping people find campsites in emergencies.
    18. Send a hand written note to someone you care about. To be completed. Did not finish.
    19. Reflect on what makes you feel valued and purposeful. Did a grateful meditation on the Balance app this morning which helped me do this.
    20. Share 3 photos of things you find meaningful or memorable.
    21. Look up at the sky and remember we are a part of something bigger. For sure! I walked the dog at 3AM and looked up at the vast night sky. I was able to see the Milky Way and billions of stars. Awesome view.
    22. Find a way to help a project or charity you care about. To be reviewed
    23. Recall 3 things that you’ve done that you are proud of.
    24. Make choices that have a positive impact on others today.
    25. Ask someone else what matters most to them and why.
    26. Remember an event in your life that was really meaningful.
    27. Focus on how your actions make a difference to others.
    28. Do something special and revisit in your mind tonight.
    29. Today do something to car for the natural world.
    30. Share a quote you find inspiring to give others a boost.
    31. Find three reasons to be hopeful about the future.
    RVRita in NM
  • kevrit
    kevrit Posts: 3,956 Member
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    Machka9 wrote: »
    kevrit wrote: »
    I absolutely LOVE the Balance app. It is free for a year for all new users. It helps my mood and calm my nerves. I’ve been using it regularly since January and have learned a lot and it has helped me cope with my anxiety in many situations and issues I’ve been dealing with this year. I recommend the app for anyone who want some peace in their lives. Even if it is only 15 minutes a day, it helps.

    RVRita

    I hope this post is ok. Mental health is a part of overall health and a big factor on our weight.

    What is the Balance app? I've not heard of it.

    M in Oz

    It is an app that teaches you how to calm yourself. A Meditation app but not for long period. It starts at 10 minutes and they talk all the way through. I started in January at 10 minutes meditation and have worked up to 10 minutes complete quiet with 10 minutes of coaching before and after. The suggestions during the talking time help you to focus and realize what is going on inside your brain. It is free for a year, so give it a try!

    RVRita
  • grandmallie
    grandmallie Posts: 9,804 Member
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    Well Tracy,Kyle and Miles have a 1:30 appt at a daycare in the town across the river from us near Kyles work.. Tracy has a list of questions to ask.. and i thonk this is the one that charges 800.00 a month
    We shall see how it goes
  • kevrit
    kevrit Posts: 3,956 Member
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    Joy1580vb wrote: »
    Machka absolutely stunning yard. It shows that you take a lot of time and pride in it. Beautiful.

    Mary if I’m reading this right, she has 3 months left on her lease. I would give her a second chance although probably nothing will change then get rid of this nightmare when the lease is up. I don’t think it will be worth it to take her to court with only 3 months left.

    Thunder and lightning last night but no rain. Supposed to be raining later today. Hopefully that will happen. Over 2 million acres has been burned in Alberta. No wonder so many are feeling the smoke.

    Joy

    I agree with Mary. Let her stay until her lease is up then don’t renew it. Meanwhile do everything in the note as far as financial charges and do keep copies of everything! Written or printed copies are best as they can’t say you modified them if they were digital.

    RVRita

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