Do not eat sandwiches

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Replies

  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    I just waiting for the cauliflower substitute for the sammiches. Can someone just PM that to me when that happens? Mmmmmkay....thanks!

    Don't eat cauliflower!

    Think about this logically.

    Cauliflowers are basically just small trees.
    Trees used to be used to build houses.
    People live in houses.
    Eating cauliflower is like eating people!
  • BrainyBurro
    BrainyBurro Posts: 6,129 Member
    I just waiting for the cauliflower substitute for the sammiches. Can someone just PM that to me when that happens? Mmmmmkay....thanks!

    Don't eat cauliflower!

    Think about this logically.

    Cauliflowers are basically just small trees.
    Trees used to be used to build houses.
    People live in houses.
    Eating cauliflower is like eating people!

    correction. albino people.
  • thesophierose
    thesophierose Posts: 754 Member
    I just waiting for the cauliflower substitute for the sammiches. Can someone just PM that to me when that happens? Mmmmmkay....thanks!

    Don't eat cauliflower!

    Think about this logically.

    Cauliflowers are basically just small trees.
    Trees used to be used to build houses.
    People live in houses.
    Eating cauliflower is like eating people!

    Bahahahahaaa, this made my day.
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    Actually, the evil plot all started with this dude...

    [img][/img]

    Lord John Montagu - the 4th Earl of Sandwich.

    Lore is that he first invented/popularized the modern sandwich by having his servants retrieve him meat between slices of bread to sustaining him during marathon gambling sessions where he did not wish to leave the gaming tables in order to retire to the dining hall for meals.

    We have been following the Evil Chancellor John's movements for some time. Not only is he a gambling addict, we also have reason to believe he is a dark sorcerer
  • Ophidion
    Ophidion Posts: 2,065 Member
    I want a sandwich. OP can you make me a natural one? aka from the kitchen.
    AG0TDaH.jpg
  • Confuzzled4ever
    Confuzzled4ever Posts: 2,860 Member
    :frown:

    But... bacon...

    BaconSandwich2_zps34fcb418.jpg

    I want this... with an egg and avocado slice on wheat or rye toast.. NOW!!
  • Ophidion
    Ophidion Posts: 2,065 Member
    Not sure if the author of this post is a troll or just dumb. :noway:

    Theoretically, if you couldn't tell, the intellectual failure might lie elsewhere.

    Quoted for WIN. lol
    Indeed
    fW2ztIY.jpg
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    :frown:

    But... bacon...

    BaconSandwich2_zps34fcb418.jpg

    I want this... with an egg and avocado slice on wheat or rye toast.. NOW!!

    This is what sandwich addiction does to people
  • Ophidion
    Ophidion Posts: 2,065 Member
    Just cause...
    NOeoBCn.jpg
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    Just cause...
    NOeoBCn.jpg

    Forget all of that because YOU HAVE A SANDMAN TICKER AND I LOVE YOU
  • TheSlorax
    TheSlorax Posts: 2,401 Member
    Just cause...
    NOeoBCn.jpg


    QFT
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    Not sure if the author of this post is a troll or just dumb. :noway:

    Theoretically, if you couldn't tell, the intellectual failure might lie elsewhere.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • I just waiting for the cauliflower substitute for the sammiches. Can someone just PM that to me when that happens? Mmmmmkay....thanks!

    Don't eat cauliflower!

    Think about this logically.

    Cauliflowers are basically just small trees.
    Trees used to be used to build houses.
    People live in houses.
    Eating cauliflower is like eating people!

    correction. albino people.

    But I sometimes like to eats the people. I think that is different than what you are saying though so I got it.

    Poor, poor, albino people. I've been so evil.
  • babyj0
    babyj0 Posts: 531 Member
    I just waiting for the cauliflower substitute for the sammiches. Can someone just PM that to me when that happens? Mmmmmkay....thanks!

    Don't eat cauliflower!

    Think about this logically.

    Cauliflowers are basically just small trees.
    Trees used to be used to build houses.
    People live in houses.
    Eating cauliflower is like eating people!

    LMFAO!
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    I just waiting for the cauliflower substitute for the sammiches. Can someone just PM that to me when that happens? Mmmmmkay....thanks!

    Don't eat cauliflower!

    Think about this logically.

    Cauliflowers are basically just small trees.
    Trees used to be used to build houses.
    People live in houses.
    Eating cauliflower is like eating people!

    correction. albino people.

    But I sometimes like to eats the people. I think that is different than what you are saying though so I got it.

    Poor, poor, albino people. I've been so evil.

    People are naturally formed so its ok to eat them
  • This is ridiculous. Seriously? Sandwiches are inherently harmless; if you have any problems with an ingredient - gluten intolerance, lactose intolerance, etcetera - simply exclude them.

    Also:

    Creme fraiche = fresh cream. Harmless.

    Fleur du sel = Either straight up salt, or something equally harmless and delicious like celery or garlic salts.

    None of this is remotely relevant or cogent.
  • Laststand2011
    Laststand2011 Posts: 42 Member
    Just picked up a sandwich at Sainsburys - King Prawn & Rocket.

    Rocket sounds kinda dangerous - I like to live on the wild side. :devil:

    Why would you eat something named after a spaceship? Space travel is unnatural!

    :huh:
  • SailorKnightWing
    SailorKnightWing Posts: 875 Member
    This is ridiculous. Seriously? Sandwiches are inherently harmless; if you have any problems with an ingredient - gluten intolerance, lactose intolerance, etcetera - simply exclude them.

    Also:

    Creme fraiche = fresh cream. Harmless.

    Fleur du sel = Either straight up salt, or something equally harmless and delicious like celery or garlic salts.

    None of this is remotely relevant or cogent.
    The joke



    ----



    Your head.
  • bethlaf
    bethlaf Posts: 954 Member
    i am converted i will no longer eat sandwiches,

    ever,
    from now on

    i will serve my bread
    meat
    cheese
    tomato
    pickle
    and lettuce

    separately on a plate
    with
    a thin line of mayonnaise and mustard separating them into
    separate (but equal) De-militarized zones

    hopefully this will stop the evil that has been perpetuated on us by
    Big Sammich Corp Et Al
  • TheSlorax
    TheSlorax Posts: 2,401 Member
    This is ridiculous. Seriously? Sandwiches are inherently harmless; if you have any problems with an ingredient - gluten intolerance, lactose intolerance, etcetera - simply exclude them.

    Also:

    Creme fraiche = fresh cream. Harmless.

    Fleur du sel = Either straight up salt, or something equally harmless and delicious like celery or garlic salts.

    None of this is remotely relevant or cogent.


    I'm guessing you have humor intolerance. it's ok, it is actually far more common than gluten sensitivity.
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    This is ridiculous. Seriously? Sandwiches are inherently harmless; if you have any problems with an ingredient - gluten intolerance, lactose intolerance, etcetera - simply exclude them.

    Also:

    Creme fraiche = fresh cream. Harmless.

    Fleur du sel = Either straight up salt, or something equally harmless and delicious like celery or garlic salts.

    None of this is remotely relevant or cogent.

    Look, I'm sorry. Excuse me.

    I understand that you're willing to believe everything that you hear about sandwiches (except for the TRUTH) but don't postulate that nonsense here.

    I am very experienced in the science of chemistry in fact I have looked at the periodic table twice just this year and even invented. About four of the elements.

    I wouldn't bother posting anything else. Spread your lies elsewhere or you may become the victim of an intellectual beatdown
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    Big Sandwich is out to get us.
  • udinth
    udinth Posts: 92
    Dihydrogen Monoxide can also cause drowning if inhaled.

    :devil:

    (Ophidion, this is especially appropriate for your icon.)

    There's a song for that: (http://filk.cracksandshards.DHMO.html)

    The DHMO Song
    Mark A. Mandel, © 1997

    to the tune of "Battle Hymn of the Republic"


    There's a chemical that poses deadly danger to us all
    If we don't eliminate it, we are headed for a fall
    But our governments refuse to see the writing on the wall
    They're going to let us die!

    CHORUS (after every verse):
    Ban dihydrogen monoxide!
    Ban dihydrogen monoxide!
    Ban dihydrogen monoxide
    Before it kills us all!

    Dihydrogen monoxide is a chemical to fear
    Uncounted thousands die of inhalation every year
    Yet the FDA allows it in our burgers, beans, and beer
    And never questions why!

    In gaseous form it's subtle, without color, taste, or smell
    But it's part of acid rain, and it's a greenhouse gas as well
    It's also found in car exhaust, which makes our cities Hell
    And dirties up the sky!

    It's widely used by industry, and agriculture too
    They dump it on the ground or in the river when they're through
    And from the ecosystem it gets into me and you
    Which they dare not deny!

    You'll find dihydrogen monoxide everywhere you go
    In rivers, oceans, lakes, and streams, in air and soil and snow
    Its quantitative formula is simply H2O --
    You'll get it if you try!

    ......[This verse contributed by Gary McGath]
    How far DHMO has spread no one can safely tell.
    They've found it on Europa, and it's on our Moon as well.
    It may well turn our Solar System to a living hell!
    It's filling up the sky!


    [See http://www.google.com/search?q=dihydrogen+monoxide]
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    Hi Mutant

    Where I come from sandwiches consist of three thing s- bread, filling, butter or spread.

    Whilst I agree that if you are buying sandwiches you cannot see the junk they paste into them to make them stay on the shelves - the humble sandwich must not be maligned. It is a quick and easy way to fuel your body with protein, carbs and fat.

    In other words yes you are getting it - you meant ready made sandwiches - the kind you can buy off the shelves.

    And I totally agree with you there

    *Woosh*
  • janatarnhem
    janatarnhem Posts: 669 Member
    :frown:

    But... bacon...

    BaconSandwich2_zps34fcb418.jpg


    What can ever be wrong with that? I want one now!!!
  • reds_1
    reds_1 Posts: 59
    This is ridiculous. Seriously? Sandwiches are inherently harmless; if you have any problems with an ingredient - gluten intolerance, lactose intolerance, etcetera - simply exclude them.

    Also:

    Creme fraiche = fresh cream. Harmless.

    Fleur du sel = Either straight up salt, or something equally harmless and delicious like celery or garlic salts.

    None of this is remotely relevant or cogent.


    I'm guessing you have humor intolerance. it's ok, it is actually far more common than gluten sensitivity.



    Nice! :D
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
    KFC-Double-Down.jpg


    This is all I've got to add to the discussion.

    OMG, where can I get one of those?
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    Great protest song!


  • Fine. Go and pollute your body! Maybe you should add done tartar or should I say TARTARIC ACID!

    ACID! Like what James Bond villains put in death pits! Go put some ACIDS IN YOU!!!!

    Uh...the body needs amino acids... or vitamins, as some people call them. I quite like my amino acids in sandwich form, sometimes.

    (MMMmmmm. Sandwiches....)

    I won't have people advocating doing acid in this thread.

    Having dropped acid before, I can only concur.

    (It's a real pain to clear up as well - had to chuck a pile of bicarbonate of soda on it...)
  • SailorKnightWing
    SailorKnightWing Posts: 875 Member
    KFC-Double-Down.jpg


    This is all I've got to add to the discussion.

    OMG, where can I get one of those?
    KFC. It's called a Double Down and is a standard menu item.