Do not eat sandwiches

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Replies

  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    sometimes they kill slowly...
    hoff-knight-rider-burger.jpg
    DavidHasselhoffCheeseburger.jpg
    9174639.jpg
  • allaboutthecake
    allaboutthecake Posts: 1,535 Member
    Keeping the innocent safe....one city at a time....from the evil sandwich!


    Sammichpolice_small.png
  • RivenV
    RivenV Posts: 1,667 Member
    sometimes they kill slowly...
    hoff-knight-rider-burger.jpg
    DavidHasselhoffCheeseburger.jpg
    9174639.jpg

    That moment when you forget how to operate a sandwich

    a98.gif
  • _amluvstld_
    _amluvstld_ Posts: 47
    Every time you eat a sandwich, a kitten dies.
  • allaboutthecake
    allaboutthecake Posts: 1,535 Member
    I just did a bunch of photosynthesizing on the Xerox machine.
    What's your point?


    Ohhhh be careful,,,,,,so very very careful !!

    mold.jpg
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    I've come to the conclusion that some of the naysayers in this thread are bots created by Big Sandwich. We should start asking them trivia questions to assess their comprehension abilities.

    Big Sandwich killed my family.

    I'm looking into filing a class action. Share your story

    It was the burgers. We were always told that they weren't sandwiches--you know, because they don't have the exact same name. So we ate them: never too often, maybe once every couple weeks or so. Looking back now, I can't believe I didn't see it. I mean, we'd finish dinner or a barbecue only to feel satiated. It seemed wrong that we could enjoy such a delicious food, feel satisfied, and still be healthy. So we started looking into it. I mean, really looking into it. A picture of a vast organization pulling the strings of all the world's governments started to form. What's even worse--they were lying to people about sandwiches (AND BURGERS) being healthy and/or acceptable. Eventually, we narrowed down the suspects... It was Big Sandwich.

    I was on my way home from filing an injunction on the entire town on behalf of the entire town's health about ridding themselves of the Bready Menace, when something felt ... off. I typically eat about 10 pounds of carrots every morning, and I think this has helped me to "see" into the future. This is just another one of those instances. I rushed home only to find that Big Sandwich must have paid a squad of goons to demolish my home, with my entire family in it. It still deeply affects me to this day when I think about the loss of my family. I'm less saddened by the property damage. Sure, I miss having en entire spare bedroom in the basement to store old gas in leaky barrels, but sometimes life conspires against you.... with Big Sandwich.

    Your family will be avenged. Your story will be told. Glob bless you.
  • stumblinthrulife
    stumblinthrulife Posts: 2,558 Member
    Every time you eat a sandwich, a kitten dies.

    That's ironic, because every time I kill a kitten, I eat a sandwich.
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    Got a PM Asking where I got my information for this thread from.

    I replied that most of the sources were in the thread and many were supplied by the King of Science.


    This is the 100%, no joke, copy pasted reply

    Really this is what I get when I ask for you information. YOU TELL ME TO READ A 16 PAGE BLOG AND LOOK FOR SOME OTHER USER THANKS DON'T BOTHER TO RECONSIDER AND HAVE CHANGE OF HEART...THANKS FOR NOTHING. YOUR YOUR GOING TO SHOW CARE AND CONCERN FOR THE COMMUNITY AND POST WARNINGS AND FDA FINDING BE PREPARED TO HELP THE INDIVIDUAL THAT ASK FOR INFORMATION AS WELL
  • darrensurrey
    darrensurrey Posts: 3,942 Member
    Every time you eat a sandwich, a kitten dies.

    That's ironic, because every time I kill a kitten, I eat a sandwich.

    Kitten sandwich?
  • RivenV
    RivenV Posts: 1,667 Member
    Every time you eat a sandwich, a kitten dies.

    That's ironic, because every time I kill a kitten, I eat a sandwich.

    662.gif
  • stumblinthrulife
    stumblinthrulife Posts: 2,558 Member
    Got a PM Asking where I got my information for this thread from.

    I replied that most of the sources were in the thread and many were supplied by the King of Science.


    This is the 100%, no joke, copy pasted reply

    Really this is what I get when I ask for you information. YOU TELL ME TO READ A 16 PAGE BLOG AND LOOK FOR SOME OTHER USER THANKS DON'T BOTHER TO RECONSIDER AND HAVE CHANGE OF HEART...THANKS FOR NOTHING. YOUR YOUR GOING TO SHOW CARE AND CONCERN FOR THE COMMUNITY AND POST WARNINGS AND FDA FINDING BE PREPARED TO HELP THE INDIVIDUAL THAT ASK FOR INFORMATION AS WELL

    They crazy is strong with them.
  • RivenV
    RivenV Posts: 1,667 Member
    Got a PM Asking where I got my information for this thread from.

    I replied that most of the sources were in the thread and many were supplied by the King of Science.


    This is the 100%, no joke, copy pasted reply

    Really this is what I get when I ask for you information. YOU TELL ME TO READ A 16 PAGE BLOG AND LOOK FOR SOME OTHER USER THANKS DON'T BOTHER TO RECONSIDER AND HAVE CHANGE OF HEART...THANKS FOR NOTHING. YOUR YOUR GOING TO SHOW CARE AND CONCERN FOR THE COMMUNITY AND POST WARNINGS AND FDA FINDING BE PREPARED TO HELP THE INDIVIDUAL THAT ASK FOR INFORMATION AS WELL

    Where's the science?!

    76f.gif

    /outrage
  • ashleyisgreat
    ashleyisgreat Posts: 586 Member
    Got a PM Asking where I got my information for this thread from.

    I replied that most of the sources were in the thread and many were supplied by the King of Science.


    This is the 100%, no joke, copy pasted reply

    Really this is what I get when I ask for you information. YOU TELL ME TO READ A 16 PAGE BLOG AND LOOK FOR SOME OTHER USER THANKS DON'T BOTHER TO RECONSIDER AND HAVE CHANGE OF HEART...THANKS FOR NOTHING. YOUR YOUR GOING TO SHOW CARE AND CONCERN FOR THE COMMUNITY AND POST WARNINGS AND FDA FINDING BE PREPARED TO HELP THE INDIVIDUAL THAT ASK FOR INFORMATION AS WELL


    Uh..yeah. That. And stuff. :laugh:
  • stumblinthrulife
    stumblinthrulife Posts: 2,558 Member
    Every time you eat a sandwich, a kitten dies.

    That's ironic, because every time I kill a kitten, I eat a sandwich.

    Kitten sandwich?

    Now you're just being silly.
  • darrensurrey
    darrensurrey Posts: 3,942 Member
    Every time you eat a sandwich, a kitten dies.

    That's ironic, because every time I kill a kitten, I eat a sandwich.

    Kitten sandwich?

    Now you're just being silly.

    But you can wash it down with:
    cat-milk-508-p.jpg
  • Pookylou
    Pookylou Posts: 988 Member
    Keeping the innocent safe....one city at a time....from the evil sandwich!


    Sammichpolice_small.png


    Those brave, brave people *wipes tear from eye* *stands and salutes*
  • Seefylol
    Seefylol Posts: 197
    I ate a sandwich once, a BLT. Ended up in hospital 2 hours later. I was in a coma, on life support for 5 months. Doctors said it was the the lettuce that did it to me but I'm telling you man, it was the tomatoes, the god damn tomatoes!

    Anyways, when I eventually woke up, I.....wasn't......normal. Everyone I looked at had human bodies but sandwiches for heads. It was really scary. Talking sandwiches everywhere!

    I heard the doctor say it was an extremely rare diagnosis called Breadonciouchious. Only 0.2% in the known universe had it, and I was one of them. Unlucky for me, right? Yeah!

    Anyway, one day I was walking home from work and out of the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of this hooded stranger. "Come here to me, boy", he said. "Take these pills". He reached out his hand and places 2 pills into my hand. A black and purple one. "These will cure you" he said. Before I had a chance to ask him a question, i looked up and he was gone :O

    I took the pills and I died.

    The end.
  • stumblinthrulife
    stumblinthrulife Posts: 2,558 Member
    Every time you eat a sandwich, a kitten dies.

    That's ironic, because every time I kill a kitten, I eat a sandwich.

    Kitten sandwich?

    Now you're just being silly.

    But you can wash it down with:
    cat-milk-508-p.jpg

    Interesting fact - cat milk lasts longer in the fridge than any other kind of milk.
  • BrainyBurro
    BrainyBurro Posts: 6,129 Member
    Got a PM Asking where I got my information for this thread from.

    I replied that most of the sources were in the thread and many were supplied by the King of Science.


    This is the 100%, no joke, copy pasted reply

    Really this is what I get when I ask for you information. YOU TELL ME TO READ A 16 PAGE BLOG AND LOOK FOR SOME OTHER USER THANKS DON'T BOTHER TO RECONSIDER AND HAVE CHANGE OF HEART...THANKS FOR NOTHING. YOUR YOUR GOING TO SHOW CARE AND CONCERN FOR THE COMMUNITY AND POST WARNINGS AND FDA FINDING BE PREPARED TO HELP THE INDIVIDUAL THAT ASK FOR INFORMATION AS WELL

    ^ that only narrows down the possible identity of author to 63.4% of the MFP membership.

    we need more clues.
  • Pookylou
    Pookylou Posts: 988 Member
    Every time you eat a sandwich, a kitten dies.

    That's ironic, because every time I kill a kitten, I eat a sandwich.

    Kitten sandwich?

    Now you're just being silly.

    But you can wash it down with:
    cat-milk-508-p.jpg

    Interesting fact - cat milk lasts longer in the fridge than any other kind of milk.

    Is that because it is actually made of sandwiches and they last forever, 'cause they are made by Satan?
  • _amluvstld_
    _amluvstld_ Posts: 47
    Every time you eat a sandwich, a kitten dies.

    That's ironic, because every time I kill a kitten, I eat a sandwich.

    :drinker:
  • stumblinthrulife
    stumblinthrulife Posts: 2,558 Member
    Every time you eat a sandwich, a kitten dies.

    That's ironic, because every time I kill a kitten, I eat a sandwich.

    Kitten sandwich?

    Now you're just being silly.

    But you can wash it down with:
    cat-milk-508-p.jpg

    Interesting fact - cat milk lasts longer in the fridge than any other kind of milk.

    Is that because it is actually made of sandwiches and they last forever, 'cause they are made by Satan?

    Nope, it's because no bugger'll drink it.
  • Tiernan1212
    Tiernan1212 Posts: 797 Member
    Got a PM Asking where I got my information for this thread from.

    I replied that most of the sources were in the thread and many were supplied by the King of Science.


    This is the 100%, no joke, copy pasted reply

    Really this is what I get when I ask for you information. YOU TELL ME TO READ A 16 PAGE BLOG AND LOOK FOR SOME OTHER USER THANKS DON'T BOTHER TO RECONSIDER AND HAVE CHANGE OF HEART...THANKS FOR NOTHING. YOUR YOUR GOING TO SHOW CARE AND CONCERN FOR THE COMMUNITY AND POST WARNINGS AND FDA FINDING BE PREPARED TO HELP THE INDIVIDUAL THAT ASK FOR INFORMATION AS WELL

    ^ that only narrows down the possible identity of author to 63.4% of the MFP membership.

    we need more clues.

    Ummm, there is a lot of screaming and yelling? Does that narrow it down to 61.7% of the users?
  • skyebare
    skyebare Posts: 57
    Then how did Jared lose so much weight? I'm thinking lipo and and a pay off check to keep his mouth shut.... Damn you Subway with your deliciously fresh baked breaded lies!!!!
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
    Got a PM Asking where I got my information for this thread from.

    I replied that most of the sources were in the thread and many were supplied by the King of Science.


    This is the 100%, no joke, copy pasted reply

    Really this is what I get when I ask for you information. YOU TELL ME TO READ A 16 PAGE BLOG AND LOOK FOR SOME OTHER USER THANKS DON'T BOTHER TO RECONSIDER AND HAVE CHANGE OF HEART...THANKS FOR NOTHING. YOUR YOUR GOING TO SHOW CARE AND CONCERN FOR THE COMMUNITY AND POST WARNINGS AND FDA FINDING BE PREPARED TO HELP THE INDIVIDUAL THAT ASK FOR INFORMATION AS WELL

    You should totally be including user names so we don't accidentally friend stupid people.
  • NRSPAM
    NRSPAM Posts: 961 Member
    OMG!!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Mutant, you are too much!!! For a minute I thought you might need to take your meds. Lololol.
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    Then how did Jared lose so much weight? I'm thinking lipo and and a pay off check to keep his mouth shut.... Damn you Subway with your deliciously fresh baked breaded lies!!!!

    It's pretty well accepted among our circles that Jarred is a cyborg
  • darrensurrey
    darrensurrey Posts: 3,942 Member
    OMG!!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Mutant, you are too much!!! For a minute I thought you might need to take your meds. Lololol.

    Well, we ought to not rule out that requirement anyway.
  • Timothy1962
    Timothy1962 Posts: 161
    I hear that AMC is looking to start a spin off from Breaking Bad where Saul Goodman resurfaces as legal counsel for a villain named Earl of Sandwiches who is trying to take over the world through the Sandwich Corp. of the world. The show will be called ... Eating Bad "the world goes to hell in a breadbasket"
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
    As the NYSE comes to a close, early indications are that shares in Subway are down 49.5% since this thread started.

    WON'T SOMEONE THINK OF THE SHAREHOLDERS???!!! :sad:

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