Those Annoying Little Comments
Replies
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You don't need to lose that *kitten*!" and cue (sp?) in the sexual comments that follow right behind (no pun) it. I've always, always, always had this "curse" and what people don't understand is, it's not beneficial, especially when you're looking for jeans that fit and that are flattering, or you're visiting a tailor for your work uniforms because of a certain problem area isn't cooperating. Not only am I "cursed" with an *kitten*, I come with doublewide hips. It's a constant struggle when you're being taped for weigh ins in the service and you're marked as overweight because of an inch here and there. I do a lot of cardio, eat right and look for ways to lose this *kitten*. According to the Navy PRT standards, the PRT coordinator is directed to tape around the largest portion of your *kitten* and that's how your hips are measured. Yeah, you read that right. I challenged the coordinator many times until one of them finally showed me the instruction. So, yeah, I have an *kitten* that'll feed people for centuries or make another celebutante famous. Hey, I'll take this as motivation to keep on doing cardio, because I need all that I can get. Cardio that is. :laugh:
THIS ^^^^^ I am not in the service but each and EVERY day my husband reminds me that my *kitten* will get smaller when losing weight - he must not remember my smaller days because this *kitten* of mine goes no where - I swear I was born with it.
Same as friends - at least you have a big *kitten*, but look at that donk, etc......0 -
my number one pet peeve is when SKINNY GIRLS complain about being "FAT." I know that no one is ever 100% happy with their bodies. but i hate it when i'm sitting there, the heaviest one in the room, and the girls i work with are all talking about going shopping for bathing suits and complaining about how their bikinis don't fit just right. When I've only worn a bikini once in my life and probably never will again. Or when they pull at their microscopic tummy 'roll' and complain about how its getting to look like a 'baby bump.' Those girls have never known the struggle of what it is to shop in only plus sized stores/sections, only be able to wear one piece swimsuits, or how it feels to be the one thats sitting there listening about how they've gained so much weight since high school when theyre still a size 2.
This x1000. It doesn't happen as much with guys but it does get a little annoying overhearing some guy at the gym talking about how he really needs to drop a few pounds to get from 12% body fat to below 10%. Fit people have no idea what actual struggle is.
What a silly statement that is. How do you know that fit person hasn't struggled with weight his whole life? Hasn't lost 100lbs to hit his current 12% body fat? Isn't struggling with grievous medical issues?
Your comment is much more annoying than someone commenting about trying to get from 12% to 10%. And for what it's worth, it is much, much more difficult to lose weight when you are already lean like that. It's very easy to lose weight when you are obese. So going from 12% to 10% IS a real struggle in itself.
Just to be clear, I recognize it's hard work to be 12% body fat and really hard work to to from 12 to 10. Hard work does not equal struggle though. A person who makes $500,000 a year and a person who makes $15,000 a year can both work really hard. Only one of them struggles.0 -
Just looking at this thread, see an over abundance of women. Seems to me women get pretty riled up and annoyed too easily. Quit worrying about what other people say and do things for yourself. Be yourself! All the other things will follow.
Or maybe more people feel more entitled to comment on a woman's body than a man's.
Maybe they've heard this all so many times that they just need to vent without getting further backlash.
Maybe we'd like to display some negativity once in a while without being accused of hysteria.
My father deemed it appropriate to comment on the size of my stomach (it was too big, according to him and his beer belly) while ordering at a restaurant when I was TWELVE. "You've got a bit of stomach there, haven't you? You've got to watch your weight!" (He was later diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes because he is overweight)
People comment on my size all of the time. The first time I met someone, she said "Oh my god, you're so skinny!". Not even a "hi" or "hello".
Start eating protein bars? Quinoa? Avoiding excessive sweets? "You're one of the THOSE people."
So yeah, I'm pretty tired of the comments.
I think men hear just as many comments. The difference is I think women put the pressure on other women. Men say things and we just say things back and that is the end of it.
Now comments from your parents is another story completely. Though maybe your dad didnt know how to communicate with you, but wanted to save you from the same fate he had with his big beer belly.
I think we see more fat men that are successful than fat women. Fat men can be in the media, but fat women can't. And when they are, people comment on it (see that youtube video of an anchorwoman responding to a rude email about her weight). Even aging is an area where women are discriminated against. Men can age--women can't. (See leading men and their ages, vs. leading women)
Now, obviously you don't know the whole story or why it was particularly hurtful, so I aim for concision:
My sister was, at this time, battling undiagnosed anorexia. My parents didn't know, but I was a nosy brat and found her blog that had her counting calories to 500 or less a day. So, he brings up my "fatness" (by the age of 18, I had never been above 135 lbs at 5'7") while we're out dining and comments in front of EVERYONE. It was utterly humiliating and brought me to the edge of the precipice. I could make a choice: I could try doing what my older sister was, or I could just let it go. I wasn't--by any means or stretch of the imagination--a fat kid.
I've tried letting it go 100%, but every so often, that sort of creeps into my head and I have to question: am I getting that stomach? So yeah, those comments get to me. So then, rather than "saving me from his fate", he made me a very insecure, quiet, teenager who became an adult who still struggles with weight and body image.
You don't say that stuff to a kid. You just don't.
No, you don't. My father was constantly saying things like this. The women in my family were always on one diet or another. It has taken me the majority of my 29 years to be happy in my skin and to love me.
As you can ascertain, I have dealt with daddy issues on top of it all. But I've learned that you can love someone without liking them.0 -
Even though I am still over 180 people constantly tell me I don't need to lose any more weight. I do recognize that the people who knew me at 399# probably see me as very thin now -- but, it's not up to them to decide where I land.0
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I read some more comments after my own contribution. It's tough.
I find the stress is caused by people, overweight or not, when you are trying to lose weight but also by people who have successfully lost weight or are lean already and turn into bullies. For both groups the most annoying things are when they insist their way is the best way or they won't take no for an answer.
Keep calm and carry on and if they insist on your having a cookie, just refocus the energy on asking for this buddy to share a walk with you instead (it won't hurt as much as a cookie, right?)
Someone mention the disparity between women and men. I would agree that it seems to be more brutal out there for the ladies with just one look at the media (re: Jessica Simpson, Misha Barton, etc). Name one guy who is getting as much as that. Val Kilmer used to be my hot thing (yes different generation) especially in that movie where he was muscular and all. I don't see him in the front page nor was Marlon Brando…
When I took the healthy route I know it was for me and for me only (well for my hubby too, not that he said anything, he is wonderful, and my future children). I just need to remember that when I start feeling the stress caused by other people.0 -
"OMG, and of course you're eating an apple. You're soooooo healthy!"
.....
....
...It's an apple.
I happen to like the taste of apples.0 -
As this just came up with my life today...its a raw subject...but I've been accused of doing drugs to lose weight. I knew it would happen as its a small town...but yeah! Seriously wanting to hand out some whoop-@$$!!!0
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I get harassed ALL the time for eating gluten-free....literally at least once a day.
Me too... and I hate having to go into the long explanation of what actually happens in a person's system who has Celiac Disease, or is severely allergic (think peanut or shellfish allergy, people). Sometimes I can't be bothered and just "whatever..."0 -
my number one pet peeve is when SKINNY GIRLS complain about being "FAT." I know that no one is ever 100% happy with their bodies. but i hate it when i'm sitting there, the heaviest one in the room, and the girls i work with are all talking about going shopping for bathing suits and complaining about how their bikinis don't fit just right. When I've only worn a bikini once in my life and probably never will again. Or when they pull at their microscopic tummy 'roll' and complain about how its getting to look like a 'baby bump.' Those girls have never known the struggle of what it is to shop in only plus sized stores/sections, only be able to wear one piece swimsuits, or how it feels to be the one thats sitting there listening about how they've gained so much weight since high school when theyre still a size 2.
I hear this so much too. When I hear the skinny girls complaining about being fat I'm all "What does that make me? A freaking whale??" Then they try to 'compliment' me and tell me they didn't mean anything by it. Really? You think being a size 0 is fat? Try being a size 22 surrounded by size 0-80 -
Hahaha, you can tell them that I also became vegetarian at the age of 11 and grew to 5'10".I couldn't tell you how many times I have heard "You know you would be taller if you ate meat" . I guess its an easy joke when you are a 4'9 vegetarian. I dont take these comments to heart, I became vegetarian at the age of 11 so I've heard it all.0 -
YUP. I'm vegan and I have people all the time say, "Oh you can't eat X." I reply, "I can, I just choose not to." We're two peas in a podI think for me it is the people that say "oh you can't have X or Y on your diet."
I'm not on a diet. I CAN have X or Y when I feel like it, and when it fits within my macros. I just choose not to sometimes.
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When someone asks how much you weigh, tell them, "You'll forgive them for asking if they'll forgive you for not answering."0
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my number one pet peeve is when SKINNY GIRLS complain about being "FAT." I know that no one is ever 100% happy with their bodies. but i hate it when i'm sitting there, the heaviest one in the room, and the girls i work with are all talking about going shopping for bathing suits and complaining about how their bikinis don't fit just right. When I've only worn a bikini once in my life and probably never will again. Or when they pull at their microscopic tummy 'roll' and complain about how its getting to look like a 'baby bump.' Those girls have never known the struggle of what it is to shop in only plus sized stores/sections, only be able to wear one piece swimsuits, or how it feels to be the one thats sitting there listening about how they've gained so much weight since high school when theyre still a size 2.
I hear this so much too. When I hear the skinny girls complaining about being fat I'm all "What does that make me? A freaking whale??" Then they try to 'compliment' me and tell me they didn't mean anything by it. Really? You think being a size 0 is fat? Try being a size 22 surrounded by size 0-8
Everybody is fighting their own battles. Your being a size 22 has no relevance to someone smaller who wants to lose 5 or 50lbs. You're just looking for a reason to get offended. Worry about yourself.0 -
My Mum who is on weight watchers when I say I'm going for a run instead of eating a slice of cake with my brew when I'm visiting her* - "Oh but you'll run it off, like I do in the gym"
No mother you do not run in the gym, you walk on the cross trainer and you sit in the sauna - you won't run, as it might hurt your ankles, knees or hips (because being obese most of your life never damaged them at all!), you don't use weights in case you hurt yourself, you won't use the rowing machines as you have weak wrists and you won't cycle as its not lady like.
*Baring in mind I live next door to her so I'm at her house pretty much as much as I am my own when I'm awake and not working.
The other one really getting to me just now is "But if you lose weight you'll get colder in the water" Y'know I can live with that, if I feel cold I'll just swim faster, which actually right now is my entire plan for that particular open water swimming event (it'll be my first in the UK, I usually go to the Middle East or similarly warm regions for events).0 -
Ha. I find that people just look disappointed when I tell them I just eat less and move more. They want to hear about some cool new diet breakthrough.2) Don't ask me what I'm doing and then get huffy when I tell you all I've done is eat less than I want most of the time.
Oh, yes. One woman has asked me repeatedly if the eat less/move more is really all I've done. Like I'm going to suddenly remember that I took Dr. Skinny's Special Tonic and that's what REALLY caused the weight loss.0 -
Not really comments, but I get eye rolls and even laughter from my dad who apparently thinks my trying to eat healthier and exercise more is just hilarious. I have been bothered by comments he's made about other people who are overweight. Like seeing someone in a restaurant who is overweight and commenting on what they're eating or wearing (too tight, etc.) Makes me mad because people could be looking at me and thinking the same thing. Would he think that was ok or funny?0
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When people judge you for eating something unhealthy in public as though that is all you eat all the time at home. They don't see that it is a treat, and how hard you work at home to eat healthily. When they see you with a piece of cake at a cafe that's all they see.0
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Random Guy: How much weight do you need to lose still?
Me: I have 100lbs to go to get to my goal weight
Random Guy: But you can't lose those boobs. I love big boobs
Really? That is what matters? Whether or not I keep the big boobs that literally cause me pain every single day and make it harder to work out because there is no sports bra big enough that I can afford??? I don't think so. If I lose my boobs then HELL YEAH!!0 -
Random Guy: How much weight do you need to lose still?
Me: I have 100lbs to go to get to my goal weight
Random Guy: But you can't lose those boobs. I love big boobs
Really? That is what matters? Whether or not I keep the big boobs that literally cause me pain every single day and make it harder to work out because there is no sports bra big enough that I can afford??? I don't think so. If I lose my boobs then HELL YEAH!!
I am hoping they are the first to go.0 -
Random Guy: How much weight do you need to lose still?
Me: I have 100lbs to go to get to my goal weight
Random Guy: But you can't lose those boobs. I love big boobs
Really? That is what matters? Whether or not I keep the big boobs that literally cause me pain every single day and make it harder to work out because there is no sports bra big enough that I can afford??? I don't think so. If I lose my boobs then HELL YEAH!!
I am hoping they are the first to go.
Oh my God me too! I like having bigger boobs but I would very happily take a full C cup! Not what I have now!! I want them, and my waist line, to be the first things to go bye bye!!0 -
I have to post on here.. I have been working out in the fitness center at the University where I work. I had a lot of back sweat today and I was walking to the locker room when a student asked me if I just worked out!! HE HE.. I said YES!0
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my number one pet peeve is when SKINNY GIRLS complain about being "FAT." I know that no one is ever 100% happy with their bodies. but i hate it when i'm sitting there, the heaviest one in the room, and the girls i work with are all talking about going shopping for bathing suits and complaining about how their bikinis don't fit just right. When I've only worn a bikini once in my life and probably never will again. Or when they pull at their microscopic tummy 'roll' and complain about how its getting to look like a 'baby bump.' Those girls have never known the struggle of what it is to shop in only plus sized stores/sections, only be able to wear one piece swimsuits, or how it feels to be the one thats sitting there listening about how they've gained so much weight since high school when theyre still a size 2.
I hear this so much too. When I hear the skinny girls complaining about being fat I'm all "What does that make me? A freaking whale??" Then they try to 'compliment' me and tell me they didn't mean anything by it. Really? You think being a size 0 is fat? Try being a size 22 surrounded by size 0-8
They DIDN'T mean anything by it. Why are some of you in this thread under the impression that every comment is directed at you? How someone views themselves, at whatever weight or whatever size, does not affect how they view you. We're all our own worst critics, and many people hold themselves to much higher standards than others. They might find you beautiful, attractive and fine at your weight; them finding unhappiness with their appearance does not translate to you.
And, again... how the hell do any of you even know these men or women's sizes? Do you check their pants label when they bend over?
Assumptions about others can never lead to anything productive. Don't worry about comparing yourself to others or projecting insecurities to others. You do you.0 -
my number one pet peeve is when SKINNY GIRLS complain about being "FAT." I know that no one is ever 100% happy with their bodies. but i hate it when i'm sitting there, the heaviest one in the room, and the girls i work with are all talking about going shopping for bathing suits and complaining about how their bikinis don't fit just right. When I've only worn a bikini once in my life and probably never will again. Or when they pull at their microscopic tummy 'roll' and complain about how its getting to look like a 'baby bump.' Those girls have never known the struggle of what it is to shop in only plus sized stores/sections, only be able to wear one piece swimsuits, or how it feels to be the one thats sitting there listening about how they've gained so much weight since high school when theyre still a size 2.
I hear this so much too. When I hear the skinny girls complaining about being fat I'm all "What does that make me? A freaking whale??" Then they try to 'compliment' me and tell me they didn't mean anything by it. Really? You think being a size 0 is fat? Try being a size 22 surrounded by size 0-8
They DIDN'T mean anything by it. Why are some of you in this thread under the impression that every comment is directed at you? How someone views themselves, at whatever weight or whatever size, does not affect how they view you. We're all our own worst critics, and many people hold themselves to much higher standards than others. They might find you beautiful, attractive and fine at your weight; them finding unhappiness with their appearance does not translate to you.
And, again... how the hell do any of you even know these men or women's sizes? Do you check their pants label when they bend over?
Assumptions about others can never lead to anything productive. Don't worry about comparing yourself to others or projecting insecurities to others. You do you.
I guess I'm the "skinny girl" now and I find that I can not complain about certain things about my body I would like to improve (flabby tummy being number one). It's as if because I'm smaller, I should just be happy with where I am and be done. We're all trying to improve ourselves, yes I've lost over 100lbs, but that doesn't mean I don't want to flatten my tummy or build some muscle or lose the rest of this fat that it hidden under my clothes. Just know, it's not about YOU.0 -
I work in the Wellness department of a grocery co-op hawking protein powder and supplements to well-heeled hippies (I know, I know). Often when I take my shift meal (usually a giant salad from the salad bar plus meat) to the cashiers up front to ring it up, someone will make a comment about how much I eat. Like, "Wow, you must be really hungry to eat all that!" It's annoying but kind of cute. Little do they know that is "first dinner". I eat "second dinner" when I get home. Not to be confused with "mandatory bedtime snack".0
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I have only been a vegetarian for a year now (as of next week!) So my family, including my husband, really doesn't understand yet. I get a lot of people asking me "How did you lose all that weight?" When I tell them I cut out meat and started filling up on fruits and veggies, they get offended, like I'm telling them it's how THEY need to be eating. If you're going to ask, don't be offended if my meal plan isn't what you want! I even try to avoid conversations when people ask me why I think vegetarianism is better than meat-eating because I don't want to feel like my "defending myself" is me "attacking" their lifestyle. Ugh.... I also still get the comments (even from my husband) along the lines of "I'd rather be happy and chunky than miserable and skinny." They say it as if I must be miserable because I'm not eating the way I used to, or the way they want me to eat. I wouldn't just be chunky, I'd be obese by now (and was) if I hadn't stopped the 10 lbs-a-year weight gain I was on the last five years of my life!0
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Random Guy: How much weight do you need to lose still?
Me: I have 100lbs to go to get to my goal weight
Random Guy: But you can't lose those boobs. I love big boobs
Really? That is what matters? Whether or not I keep the big boobs that literally cause me pain every single day and make it harder to work out because there is no sports bra big enough that I can afford??? I don't think so. If I lose my boobs then HELL YEAH!!
I am hoping they are the first to go.
Oh my God me too! I like having bigger boobs but I would very happily take a full C cup! Not what I have now!! I want them, and my waist line, to be the first things to go bye bye!!
I'll take some if you like..I haven't got any! :frown:0 -
When people judge you for eating something unhealthy in public as though that is all you eat all the time at home. They don't see that it is a treat, and how hard you work at home to eat healthily. When they see you with a piece of cake at a cafe that's all they see.
Assuming they're a healthy weight and appear as such I think it's ridiculous to judge someone for what they're eating in a restaurant.
Now... if we're talking about someone morbidly obese or even obese, it's clear that it's not "just a treat" but a serious medical issue.
No one wants to see an alcoholic drunk.
No one wants to see drug addict get a fix.
No one wants to see a morbidly obese person chowing down on a 2,000 kcal plate.0 -
Random Guy: How much weight do you need to lose still?
Me: I have 100lbs to go to get to my goal weight
Random Guy: But you can't lose those boobs. I love big boobs
Really? That is what matters? Whether or not I keep the big boobs that literally cause me pain every single day and make it harder to work out because there is no sports bra big enough that I can afford??? I don't think so. If I lose my boobs then HELL YEAH!!
I am hoping they are the first to go.
Oh my God me too! I like having bigger boobs but I would very happily take a full C cup! Not what I have now!! I want them, and my waist line, to be the first things to go bye bye!!
I'll take some if you like..I haven't got any! :frown:
lol I will tell you what I told my friends in high school. Pay for the surgery, we will chop one of mine off and you can have it, then I will divide the other one in half 0 -
No one wants to see an alcoholic drunk.
No one wants to see drug addict get a fix.
No one wants to see a morbidly obese person chowing down on a 2,000 kcal plate.
I dislike blanket judgemental more. To be honest, whenever I see these things I just hope that person manages to conquer their daemons. Living your life at the mercy of addiction or compulsion is downright awful. But it doesn't need to be hidden behind closed doors. There's no shame in existing as a morbidly obese person.0 -
my number one pet peeve is when SKINNY GIRLS complain about being "FAT." I know that no one is ever 100% happy with their bodies. but i hate it when i'm sitting there, the heaviest one in the room, and the girls i work with are all talking about going shopping for bathing suits and complaining about how their bikinis don't fit just right. When I've only worn a bikini once in my life and probably never will again. Or when they pull at their microscopic tummy 'roll' and complain about how its getting to look like a 'baby bump.' Those girls have never known the struggle of what it is to shop in only plus sized stores/sections, only be able to wear one piece swimsuits, or how it feels to be the one thats sitting there listening about how they've gained so much weight since high school when theyre still a size 2.
I hear this so much too. When I hear the skinny girls complaining about being fat I'm all "What does that make me? A freaking whale??" Then they try to 'compliment' me and tell me they didn't mean anything by it. Really? You think being a size 0 is fat? Try being a size 22 surrounded by size 0-8
They DIDN'T mean anything by it. Why are some of you in this thread under the impression that every comment is directed at you? How someone views themselves, at whatever weight or whatever size, does not affect how they view you. We're all our own worst critics, and many people hold themselves to much higher standards than others. They might find you beautiful, attractive and fine at your weight; them finding unhappiness with their appearance does not translate to you.
And, again... how the hell do any of you even know these men or women's sizes? Do you check their pants label when they bend over?
Assumptions about others can never lead to anything productive. Don't worry about comparing yourself to others or projecting insecurities to others. You do you.
Maybe they don't mean anything by it but it's still really insensitive to make such comments. There are appropriate times to express your own worries and insecurities but it's not appropriate to do so when you're around people who have bigger concerns. That's just not very thoughtful.0
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