Is it okay to "flaunt"?

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Replies

  • fauxpunker
    fauxpunker Posts: 59 Member
    Listen to Dr. Laura Schlessinger on Sirius Satellite Radio Starz Channel 106. It requires a subscription fee but it's worth it.

    Or for a one time fee she could get a lobotomy and achieve the same result.
  • DJ7203
    DJ7203 Posts: 497 Member
    My Husband is the exact opposite. He loves when I dress sexy for him when we go out. He knows how hard I have worked for my body & he likes when I show it off. However, I would never wear some of the things that I wear with him if I was out alone, because I am doing it for him & not to have guys try to talk to me.
  • castadiva
    castadiva Posts: 2,016 Member
    Flaunting one's hard-won body in and of itself isn't a problem, exactly, and in some situations may be entirely appropriate. I'd venture to suggest that might be at the beach, at the gym or maybe in a nightclub, rather than on a casual patio or at your husband's friend's party, though. Consider the context. Are other women at these events going to be dressed to attract maximum attention/with a lot of skin exposed, or is it a more laid-back or formal environment? As others have suggested, I always feel that balance is important in most situations, as a general rule - short skirt/shorts = more coverage up top, lots of cleavage = legs less on display (which doesn't have to mean long/full coverage, but maybe only a couple of inches above the knee, rather than definitely 'short'!). You can certainly flaunt your achievements, in the situation you describe, but maybe focus on showing off one area at a time, rather than all at once!
  • MissLeelooDallas
    MissLeelooDallas Posts: 145 Member
    Holy moly there's been a lot of activity on here! I will catch up after my morning red bull :drinker:

    Anyway... My profile photo is now one of the outfit in question...
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    Holy moly there's been a lot of activity on here! I will catch up after my morning red bull :drinker:

    Anyway... My profile photo is now one of the outfit in question...

    This is the outfit? This is what's causing all the issue?

    Seriously?

    You look fine and not at all inappropriate to go and sit on a patio at some bar, unless I misunderstand what one wears to a bar or something and it's secretly some kind of dress up event.
  • Dam when i get to the stage where I can wear short short and a top like that my hubby will be so happy for me and go and show me off to the world as he knows how hard I am working to get the weight off
  • redheaddee
    redheaddee Posts: 2,005 Member
    Holy moly there's been a lot of activity on here! I will catch up after my morning red bull :drinker:

    Anyway... My profile photo is now one of the outfit in question...

    You're 29, the outfit is cute as hell, and you pull it off. Wear it and FTW. So unbelievably DGAF what others think, you like it, you wear it. And Dr. Laura is a nutjob.
  • SymphonynSonata
    SymphonynSonata Posts: 533 Member
    Holy moly there's been a lot of activity on here! I will catch up after my morning red bull :drinker:

    Anyway... My profile photo is now one of the outfit in question...

    This is the outfit? This is what's causing all the issue?

    Seriously?
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^!

    I personally don't even find the outfit sexy. You look like every single woman in Florida on a summer day (only your body rocks!). 100% appropriate. Jesus, I thought you were gonna be in a g-string.
  • Orion782
    Orion782 Posts: 391
    Holy moly there's been a lot of activity on here! I will catch up after my morning red bull :drinker:

    Anyway... My profile photo is now one of the outfit in question...

    You're 29, the outfit is cute as hell, and you pull it off. Wear it and FTW. So unbelievably DGAF what others think, you like it, you wear it. And Dr. Laura is a nutjob.

    What I think has been lost in all of this name calling and cat fighting between women, is that it is the OP's HUSBAND who did not approve of what she was wearing. This had nothing to do with "offending" her friends or other people in public. If the OP's husband is not comfortable with her dressing that way, she should obviously have a discussion with him about why he feels that way and come to an understanding of his feelings. Whether or not you or I agree with his feelings is a completely moot point; if you are in a marriage you should respect the other person's feelings even if they are sometimes unreasonable. This is not an issue of "girl power" and "wear what you want"...this is solely an issue between OP and her husband. His opinion and his alone marks the difference. If OP decides to continue wearing this in opposition to her husband's feelings about it, then there WILL BE a problem and further discord...it doesn't matter what you/I think about how she looks in it and how she should operate in a vacuum or as a single person.

    /thread. Please.
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    also 101lbs is a horrible goal for your size......too skinny as it is. TBH.

    FTR, it's not a goal, she's already at 101 pounds.

    I don't think the rest should be dignified with a response.
  • SymphonynSonata
    SymphonynSonata Posts: 533 Member
    Oh, here we go. In for age-weight appropriateness. HOW DARE YOU BE 101 POUNDS YOU AREN'T 18 ANYMORE.
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    Holy moly there's been a lot of activity on here! I will catch up after my morning red bull :drinker:

    Anyway... My profile photo is now one of the outfit in question...

    You're 29, the outfit is cute as hell, and you pull it off. Wear it and FTW. So unbelievably DGAF what others think, you like it, you wear it. And Dr. Laura is a nutjob.

    What I think has been lost in all of this name calling and cat fighting between women, is that it is the OP's HUSBAND who did not approve of what she was wearing. This had nothing to do with "offending" her friends or other people in public. If the OP's husband is not comfortable with her dressing that way, she should obviously have a discussion with him about why he feels that way and come to an understanding of his feelings. Whether or not you or I agree with his feelings is a completely moot point; if you are in a marriage you should respect the other person's feelings even if they are sometimes unreasonable. This is not an issue of "girl power" and "wear what you want"...this is solely an issue between OP and her husband. His opinion and his alone marks the difference. If OP decides to continue wearing this in opposition to her husband's feelings about it, then there WILL BE a problem and further discord...it doesn't matter what you/I think about how she looks in it and how she should operate in a vacuum or as a single person.

    /thread. Please.

    Indeed. She should be more like Amy on the page before this.

    :yawn:
  • MissLeelooDallas
    MissLeelooDallas Posts: 145 Member
    also 101lbs is a horrible goal for your size......too skinny as it is. TBH.

    Oh for the love of.... Not even worth it..

    My goal weight is 105 which is perfectly healthy for someone my height.
  • jenmom2myboys
    jenmom2myboys Posts: 311 Member
    Listen to Dr. Laura Schlessinger on Sirius Satellite Radio Starz Channel 106. It requires a subscription fee but it's worth it.

    Or for a one time fee she could get a lobotomy and achieve the same result.

    lol
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    If the friend's wife is jealous over something like that, then she is an insecure person and that's her problem, not yours.

    It sounds more like that was an excuse, though, and your husband had an issue with what you were wearing. As far as I'm concerned, if your outfit was appropriate for the activities (a very casual party, say, over something more formal) then whether it was OK is between you and your husband.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    also 101lbs is a horrible goal for your size......too skinny as it is. TBH.
    I'm 5'3" and weighed 102 pounds when I was in my second trimester of pregnancy. I looked fine. The OP looks fine.

    As long as she's healthy, your opinion on her weight isn't really necessary.
  • spsanderson
    spsanderson Posts: 39 Member
    Sounds like a subconscious control issue. This happens all the time when one half of the couple looses weight. The control issue is the underlying jealousy, the attention that will be paid to you know that you have lost the weight you desired to loose, while you may not even be thinking of deviating from your husband, he is probably afraid of looks you do/will be getting etc. Maybe you have lost the weight and this is the first season of being able to show it off and he has not had to deal with that before, or maybe it's been some time I don't know.

    But is there something wrong with flaunting, no, maybe instead of midriff find a form fitting shirt that is a little more low cut than usual and instead of getting upset you might just catch him staring, it's one way of saying hey look at me that might not make him feel to uncomfortable.
  • kittenful
    kittenful Posts: 318 Member
    Holy moly there's been a lot of activity on here! I will catch up after my morning red bull :drinker:

    Anyway... My profile photo is now one of the outfit in question...

    That outfit is adorable! I don't see the big deal. If others are "uncomfortable" with what you're wearing, then they might not want to leave the house this summer. *shrug*
  • DawnieB1977
    DawnieB1977 Posts: 4,248 Member
    I think you look great! If you live somewhere hot then I'm sure women dress like that quite often anyway. The top you have on is very modest, it's hardly some skin tight top moulded to your boobs! You look like you're naturally slim anyway. Perhaps if you had a super curvy figure with DD boobs it might look slightly different lol.

    I never had the confidence to wear shorts, but I wear short sundresses in the summer (I live in England so it's not warm for many weeks!).

    I'm 36 and I'd wear your outfit if I liked my thighs enough (and if I weren't 39 weeks pregnant lol).
  • It's okay to flaunt as long as you're not doing it to make somebody else feel bad. Just be appropriate about it. Maybe you wore short-shorts and crop-tops in high school/college, but some 30-something woman shouldn't be wearing kid's clothes IMO. A back-revealing dress or a wispy dress belted at the waist with some nice heels will look sexy AND classy. Wear something that shows off your figure, but be mindful of others if you're going to THEIR house.

    I think your husband was right to be concerned about how others might feel. If you want that attire, invite them to YOUR place next time. Your house, your rules.

    Stay classy <3
  • Losing75byDecember
    Losing75byDecember Posts: 104 Member
    I'll put it bluntly and to the point, grow the hell up. You wore it to show off and get attention and most likely to make your husband jealous! This isn't reality TV!!!
  • SingingSingleTracker
    SingingSingleTracker Posts: 1,866 Member
    Anyway... My profile photo is now one of the outfit in question...

    13870370315_afc9dd748f_o.jpgImagePlease

    Looks fine. In fact, it is a bit conservative for what I thought it was going to be in your initial description.

    I lived through the 60's and early 70's where your outfit would have been nearly deemed to be worn only by a prude. ;-)

    Perhaps we all worry too much....
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    It's okay to flaunt as long as you're not doing it to make somebody else feel bad. Just be appropriate about it. Maybe you wore short-shorts and crop-tops in high school/college, but some 30-something woman shouldn't be wearing kid's clothes IMO. A back-revealing dress or a wispy dress belted at the waist with some nice heels will look sexy AND classy. Wear something that shows off your figure, but be mindful of others if you're going to THEIR house.

    I think your husband was right to be concerned about how others might feel. If you want that attire, invite them to YOUR place next time. Your house, your rules.

    Stay classy <3

    All of those things you suggest would be a millions times more 'flaunting' than her jean shorts and t-shirt. She's wearing a casual outfit that you'd see any woman wearing during warm weather.

    The OP's outfit is basically the opposite of what I'd call flaunting. My mom would probably wear something like that, with flip flops, to go walking about.
  • timeapart
    timeapart Posts: 9 Member
    If you want to wear the outfit wear it.
    If you wanted to cover up that's fine too.
    Don't ever let other people tell you what you can and can't do with your life.
    If you feel amazing and want to show other people that, then go ahead!
  • redheaddee
    redheaddee Posts: 2,005 Member
    Holy moly there's been a lot of activity on here! I will catch up after my morning red bull :drinker:

    Anyway... My profile photo is now one of the outfit in question...

    You're 29, the outfit is cute as hell, and you pull it off. Wear it and FTW. So unbelievably DGAF what others think, you like it, you wear it. And Dr. Laura is a nutjob.

    What I think has been lost in all of this name calling and cat fighting between women, is that it is the OP's HUSBAND who did not approve of what she was wearing. This had nothing to do with "offending" her friends or other people in public. If the OP's husband is not comfortable with her dressing that way, she should obviously have a discussion with him about why he feels that way and come to an understanding of his feelings. Whether or not you or I agree with his feelings is a completely moot point; if you are in a marriage you should respect the other person's feelings even if they are sometimes unreasonable. This is not an issue of "girl power" and "wear what you want"...this is solely an issue between OP and her husband. His opinion and his alone marks the difference. If OP decides to continue wearing this in opposition to her husband's feelings about it, then there WILL BE a problem and further discord...it doesn't matter what you/I think about how she looks in it and how she should operate in a vacuum or as a single person.

    /thread. Please.

    Oh please. Did I travel via Tardis back to 1950? Should I consult my husband about my outfit every day prior to leaving for work? Should I even be working? Perhaps I should be pregnant and making him a sammich in my Leave it to Beaver floral print apron. Why should she change her outfit to respect his feelings as opposed to him respecting hers desire to feel pretty and sexy. Oh I don't think so. :noway:
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    this is solely an issue between OP and her husband. His opinion and his alone marks the difference. If OP decides to continue wearing this in opposition to her husband's feelings about it, then there WILL BE a problem and further discord...it doesn't matter what you/I think about how she looks in it and how she should operate in a vacuum or as a single person.

    I was in a relationship like that once. Never, ever again.
  • Galatea_Stone
    Galatea_Stone Posts: 2,037 Member
    Anyway... My profile photo is now one of the outfit in question...

    13870370315_afc9dd748f_o.jpgImagePlease

    Looks fine. In fact, it is a bit conservative for what I thought it was going to be in your initial description.

    I lived through the 60's and early 70's where your outfit would have been nearly deemed to be worn only by a prude. ;-)

    Perhaps we all worry too much....

    1) I'm way older than OP and I would never hesitate to wear those shorts. Most likely with a pair of platform espadrilles for extra height.

    2) It's not even a crop top. It is a regular top with peek-a-boo cutouts. The hem comes below the navel. A crop top has the hem above the navel.

    OP, your husband is acting possessive and a little jealous. He's using your mutual friend as his excuse because he's worried her husband will be checking you out. That guy's already seen you in a bikini, so not really even sure why he's worried about this outfit. Either that, or he doesn't like the style of the top and rather than tell you that, he's going to use your friend as a scapegoat so you can't be mad at him for not liking your top. Men are like that. Heck, women are like that.

    There is nothing at all wrong with what you're wearing. Compared to some of the things I've seen on women, this outfit is downright conservative!
  • DJ7203
    DJ7203 Posts: 497 Member
    I'll put it bluntly and to the point, grow the hell up. You wore it to show off and get attention and most likely to make your husband jealous! This isn't reality TV!!!

    Wow, someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed.
  • DJ7203
    DJ7203 Posts: 497 Member
    I looked at your pic & you look great. Your outfit isn't even revealing! Geez, if your Husband thought that outfit was too revealing he would hate what I wear haha! Wear what makes you happy :flowerforyou:
  • The_Aly_Wei
    The_Aly_Wei Posts: 844 Member
    Holy moly there's been a lot of activity on here! I will catch up after my morning red bull :drinker:

    Anyway... My profile photo is now one of the outfit in question...

    You're 29, the outfit is cute as hell, and you pull it off. Wear it and FTW. So unbelievably DGAF what others think, you like it, you wear it. And Dr. Laura is a nutjob.

    What I think has been lost in all of this name calling and cat fighting between women, is that it is the OP's HUSBAND who did not approve of what she was wearing. This had nothing to do with "offending" her friends or other people in public. If the OP's husband is not comfortable with her dressing that way, she should obviously have a discussion with him about why he feels that way and come to an understanding of his feelings. Whether or not you or I agree with his feelings is a completely moot point; if you are in a marriage you should respect the other person's feelings even if they are sometimes unreasonable. This is not an issue of "girl power" and "wear what you want"...this is solely an issue between OP and her husband. His opinion and his alone marks the difference. If OP decides to continue wearing this in opposition to her husband's feelings about it, then there WILL BE a problem and further discord...it doesn't matter what you/I think about how she looks in it and how she should operate in a vacuum or as a single person.

    /thread. Please.

    Oh please. Did I travel via Tardis back to 1950? Should I consult my husband about my outfit every day prior to leaving for work? Should I even be working? Perhaps I should be pregnant and making him a sammich in my Leave it to Beaver floral print apron. Why should she change her outfit to respect his feelings as opposed to him respecting hers desire to feel pretty and sexy. Oh I don't think so. :noway:

    Hummm, or if that is your opinion...dont get married? Perhaps that would make sense...