A question for dads in the dating world
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Hello wonderful fathers of the world, I have a question for you!
The Facts:
Come Father's Day this year, my boyfriend will have been together just shy of a year,
He's 38 and has the most beautiful 8 year old girl,
I'm 22 and have no children,
Though we plan on building a life together, we never plan on having kids together - I don't want kids, and he doesn't want any more,
We finally decided about a month ago that it was time for me to meet his little one, and her and I are getting to know each other,
I think my boyfriend is an amazing, committed, loving father - honestly one of the best dads I've ever had the pleasure of knowing.
Alright - the question:
Is it appropriate to get him a gift for Fathers Day?
If I do, I was thinking of getting him something he could do with his daughter - gift cards for them to go to the movies and get ice cream, or something of that nature. Your thoughts?
Single dad here, not dating....it's a great idea, especially making it a daddy/daughter date thing. My daughter is 14 (almost 15) and we still do daddy/daughter dates. My son and I go and do wingman things (he's 9). Long term wise, if the relationship between the two of you develops into something more down the road and you continue to do this, they both will remember it as something special. Hope this helps.0 -
I only commented because, well, crazy.am i the only person who thinks it's a tad bizarre that a 37 year old man got into a relationship with a 21 year old girl?
Seems like she's far more mature than some older people posting in the thread.
Seconded.
Also this thread once again proves there is no topic a woman does not feel qualified to give her advice on.
"Hi, I have a question for single dads.."
"Well I'm a single, childless female, let me tell you what I think."0 -
When I was 19, I was seeing someone who was 35 and that lasted off and on for nine years. I have a friend who's 32 and has been married for several years to a man who's 62. They're a lovely, wonderful couple. Just had a baby, too.am i the only person who thinks it's a tad bizarre that a 37 year old man got into a relationship with a 21 year old girl?
So, no, I don't find it bizarre. And this particular 22-year-old seems quite mature.
ahhhh now I understand
lol.... 0 -
am i the only person who thinks it's a tad bizarre that a 37 year old man got into a relationship with a 21 year old girl?
Seems like she's far more mature than some older people posting in the thread.
Seconded.
Also this thread once again proves there is no topic a woman does not feel qualified to give her advice on.
"Hi, I have a question for single dads.."
"Well I'm a single, childless female, let me tell you what I think."
Hater
0 -
am i the only person who thinks it's a tad bizarre that a 37 year old man got into a relationship with a 21 year old girl?
In this day and age no it doesn't suprise me, and for what it's worth she seems a lot older then her age by what she has said.0 -
I'm a single Dad here with full custody of my children (3).
I could not imagine life without them.
To the topic on hand.
When I meet someone, I will buy her a Mother's day gift. (if she has kids)
Just as getting a Father's day gift will be greatly appreciated.
It's about showing love for your S.O.
Set aside all the bullshlt that comes from jerks on here!0 -
I can only imagine how devastated the daughters mother is.... he is 38..... has an 8 year old..... you are 22..... no kids.... oh gosh....
I AM a mother... of 2... so... if this situation happened to me... I would NOT be happy... sucks everything is ALWAYS harder on the mother than the father... he gets to run away with his 22 year old teenie beanie girlfriend getting partial custody sitting around having the best time of his life... while she.... is probably miserable thinking about how her husband left her for a freakin 22 year old with no kids!
you.. my friend will never understand the pain... it SUCKS how men get the easy way out... but when woman with children age.. grow old.... no man wants them.... unless they have some weird fetish thing... this is what the world is coming to!!
just so you know.. when you were 3 years old he was 19!!!
gold--- trigger? ---- gold---- diggggggg? what? im probably gonna get all this hate just from stating the truth... sorry... but its true...
Men get the easy way out???? Ummm....sorry, but that just ain't true. You can have all your bitter anger at men - which CLEARLY comes through in your post - but to say we get the easy way out is crap. I don't get to see my kids every day. I don't get to tuck them in every night. I don't get to pick them up when they fall down or hear them laugh or gets their hugs and kisses. Yes, I can talk to them as much as I want to and yes, I can Facetime with them. But I get them for a few hours every Wednesday night and a couple of weekends a month.
Do I have more freedom than my ex? Yes, I do. But I would trade it in a heartbeat for some extra time with my kids because my son and daughter are THE most important people in my life. I would love to see them every day and spend time with them every day. But I don't get that opportunity.
I'm sure it seems to you that your ex is living it up and loving life. Maybe he is. I don't know the guy. But the Sunday afternoons when my ex picks up my kids and takes them back to her house sucks. I go from 48 hours of laughter and smiles and playtime and fun with my kids to the kind of emptiness and loneliness that I wouldn't wish on anyone.
So, by all means, be jealous of your ex and his freedom if you like. Or, if you're that upset about it, offer to trade custodial time with your ex. But don't you DARE say that men have it easier just because we have a little more spare time. Our hearts are ripped out of our chests every time we see our kids drive away. That's about as far from easy as it gets.0 -
am i the only person who thinks it's a tad bizarre that a 37 year old man got into a relationship with a 21 year old girl?
Seems like she's far more mature than some older people posting in the thread.
Seconded.
Also this thread once again proves there is no topic a woman does not feel qualified to give her advice on.
"Hi, I have a question for single dads.."
"Well I'm a single, childless female, let me tell you what I think."
Hater
'Bater
You know you like it...0 -
I can only imagine how devastated the daughters mother is.... he is 38..... has an 8 year old..... you are 22..... no kids.... oh gosh....
I AM a mother... of 2... so... if this situation happened to me... I would NOT be happy... sucks everything is ALWAYS harder on the mother than the father... he gets to run away with his 22 year old teenie beanie girlfriend getting partial custody sitting around having the best time of his life... while she.... is probably miserable thinking about how her husband left her for a freakin 22 year old with no kids!
you.. my friend will never understand the pain... it SUCKS how men get the easy way out... but when woman with children age.. grow old.... no man wants them.... unless they have some weird fetish thing... this is what the world is coming to!!
just so you know.. when you were 3 years old he was 19!!!
gold--- trigger? ---- gold---- diggggggg? what? im probably gonna get all this hate just from stating the truth... sorry... but its true...
What a sad sad world you live in!
1. OP never said that he left his wife for her.
2. OP never said that he shared custody with his ex-wife.
3. I'm a divorced mother with a kid in high school and desired by men... and not just because of the weird fetish thing. :laugh: (Seriously... WTH?!?!?!)
4. You have no idea that this guy has any money at all so calling OP a gold digger was just not even appropriate.
This is a thoughtful gesture and you are a horrible person for poo-poo'ing on it! :noway:0 -
Some of you ladies are bat**** crazy.
OP, you sound like a very mature, balanced woman who is being very considerate in this matter. On behalf of men everywhere, I thank you.
As a childless man, I think your gift idea is not only fine, but thoughtful.0 -
I can only imagine how devastated the daughters mother is.... he is 38..... has an 8 year old..... you are 22..... no kids.... oh gosh....
I AM a mother... of 2... so... if this situation happened to me... I would NOT be happy... sucks everything is ALWAYS harder on the mother than the father... he gets to run away with his 22 year old teenie beanie girlfriend getting partial custody sitting around having the best time of his life... while she.... is probably miserable thinking about how her husband left her for a freakin 22 year old with no kids!
you.. my friend will never understand the pain... it SUCKS how men get the easy way out... but when woman with children age.. grow old.... no man wants them.... unless they have some weird fetish thing... this is what the world is coming to!!
just so you know.. when you were 3 years old he was 19!!!
gold--- trigger? ---- gold---- diggggggg? what? im probably gonna get all this hate just from stating the truth... sorry... but its true...
Men get the easy way out???? Ummm....sorry, but that just ain't true. You can have all your bitter anger at men - which CLEARLY comes through in your post - but to say we get the easy way out is crap. I don't get to see my kids every day. I don't get to tuck them in every night. I don't get to pick them up when they fall down or hear them laugh or gets their hugs and kisses. Yes, I can talk to them as much as I want to and yes, I can Facetime with them. But I get them for a few hours every Wednesday night and a couple of weekends a month.
Do I have more freedom than my ex? Yes, I do. But I would trade it in a heartbeat for some extra time with my kids because my son and daughter are THE most important people in my life. I would love to see them every day and spend time with them every day. But I don't get that opportunity.
I'm sure it seems to you that your ex is living it up and loving life. Maybe he is. I don't know the guy. But the Sunday afternoons when my ex picks up my kids and takes them back to her house sucks. I go from 48 hours of laughter and smiles and playtime and fun with my kids to the kind of emptiness and loneliness that I wouldn't wish on anyone.
So, by all means, be jealous of your ex and his freedom if you like. Or, if you're that upset about it, offer to trade custodial time with your ex. But don't you DARE say that men have it easier just because we have a little more spare time. Our hearts are ripped out of our chests every time we see our kids drive away. That's about as far from easy as it gets.
I wish my kids had a father like you...he is one of those parents that could care less unfortunately, good luck to you!0 -
am i the only person who thinks it's a tad bizarre that a 37 year old man got into a relationship with a 21 year old girl?
Seems like she's far more mature than some older people posting in the thread.
Seconded.
Also this thread once again proves there is no topic a woman does not feel qualified to give her advice on.
"Hi, I have a question for single dads.."
"Well I'm a single, childless female, let me tell you what I think."
Hater
'Bater
I was expecting the previous quote to say "master".0 -
Understand what, exactly? My fiance is only 4 years older than I am and I get along fine with his ex-wife (who has been remarried twice since they divorced, so clearly she has no problem as an "older" single mom finding men who are interested ...).
When I was 19, I was seeing someone who was 35 and that lasted off and on for nine years. I have a friend who's 32 and has been married for several years to a man who's 62. They're a lovely, wonderful couple. Just had a baby, too.am i the only person who thinks it's a tad bizarre that a 37 year old man got into a relationship with a 21 year old girl?
So, no, I don't find it bizarre. And this particular 22-year-old seems quite mature.
ahhhh now I understand lol....0 -
I can only imagine how devastated the daughters mother is.... he is 38..... has an 8 year old..... you are 22..... no kids.... oh gosh....
I AM a mother... of 2... so... if this situation happened to me... I would NOT be happy... sucks everything is ALWAYS harder on the mother than the father... he gets to run away with his 22 year old teenie beanie girlfriend getting partial custody sitting around having the best time of his life... while she.... is probably miserable thinking about how her husband left her for a freakin 22 year old with no kids!
you.. my friend will never understand the pain... it SUCKS how men get the easy way out... but when woman with children age.. grow old.... no man wants them.... unless they have some weird fetish thing... this is what the world is coming to!!
just so you know.. when you were 3 years old he was 19!!!
gold--- trigger? ---- gold---- diggggggg? what? im probably gonna get all this hate just from stating the truth... sorry... but its true...
You are psychotic.0 -
I can only imagine how devastated the daughters mother is.... he is 38..... has an 8 year old..... you are 22..... no kids.... oh gosh....
I AM a mother... of 2... so... if this situation happened to me... I would NOT be happy... sucks everything is ALWAYS harder on the mother than the father... he gets to run away with his 22 year old teenie beanie girlfriend getting partial custody sitting around having the best time of his life... while she.... is probably miserable thinking about how her husband left her for a freakin 22 year old with no kids!
you.. my friend will never understand the pain... it SUCKS how men get the easy way out... but when woman with children age.. grow old.... no man wants them.... unless they have some weird fetish thing... this is what the world is coming to!!
just so you know.. when you were 3 years old he was 19!!!
gold--- trigger? ---- gold---- diggggggg? what? im probably gonna get all this hate just from stating the truth... sorry... but its true...
this is psychological terms is called projecting. don't, just don't.0 -
Of course you should get him something, OP. His ex-wife shouldn't be called to ask permission to get her boyfriend a gift. She has no say in it, technically, but it's awesome you two can communicate and have a cordial relationship for the sake of the child.
Now go... get him a card and whatever else you'd like.
^^this
Good mothers like it when the good fathers to their children are appropriately recognized as such. Given the backstory, I see no problem. My ex is 15 yrs my senior, and neither his teen daughter nor his ex-wife were particularly fond of childless me. didn't stop me from registering my own appreication of his being a good father (even though his fatherhood really had nothing to do with me). IMO, each of us owes a debt of gratitude to good PARENTS for getting future world citizens started as good people.0 -
you could apply literally everything you said in your post to a woman. im not sexist, but women like you make me wish i was gayI can only imagine how devastated the daughters mother is.... he is 38..... has an 8 year old..... you are 22..... no kids.... oh gosh....
I AM a mother... of 2... so... if this situation happened to me... I would NOT be happy... sucks everything is ALWAYS harder on the mother than the father... he gets to run away with his 22 year old teenie beanie girlfriend getting partial custody sitting around having the best time of his life... while she.... is probably miserable thinking about how her husband left her for a freakin 22 year old with no kids!
you.. my friend will never understand the pain... it SUCKS how men get the easy way out... but when woman with children age.. grow old.... no man wants them.... unless they have some weird fetish thing... this is what the world is coming to!!
just so you know.. when you were 3 years old he was 19!!!
gold--- trigger? ---- gold---- diggggggg? what? im probably gonna get all this hate just from stating the truth... sorry... but its true...0 -
am i the only person who thinks it's a tad bizarre that a 37 year old man got into a relationship with a 21 year old girl?
0 -
ha! I gave up pointing that out a long time ago....and you're right, doesn't matter what the topic isam i the only person who thinks it's a tad bizarre that a 37 year old man got into a relationship with a 21 year old girl?
Seems like she's far more mature than some older people posting in the thread.
Seconded.
Also this thread once again proves there is no topic a woman does not feel qualified to give her advice on.
"Hi, I have a question for dads who are dating.."
"Well I'm a single, childless female, let me tell you what I think."
\m/0
This discussion has been closed.
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