Being hit on/flirted with?

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  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
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    I never flirted or hit on a women in my life and I just turned 33 last Friday.I just figure since I am fat and in my mind ugly that they would think it would be weird or creepy but I am also really shy as well so I live in my head and talk myself out of it.It takes courage to go up to a women.Women for some reason don't do it but they have the pick of the litter as we men just wait in line.

    Trust me, looks have nothing to do with it. There are a number of gorgeous men who can just be creepy as hell in the way that they approach women.
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
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    I personally enjoy it. However, I am married and freely state so on here, plus my husband is also actively involved on mfp so nothing is hidden from him and vise versa, so some flirting, most is fine but I can't stand it when someone clearly crosses that line knowing I am married and my husband can see these comments. And the average flirting isn't an issue, I know he gets flirted with and he knows that I do too... we realize that being attracted to other people and being attractive to others is inevitable. We definitely greet this with open arms, plus it's a good reminder that even though you're happily married you still got it. You don't lose your identity as just a wife/husband mother/father. You're still an individual and a damn sexy one at that.

    I flirt with both of you often! :bigsmile:
  • _Lovely77_
    _Lovely77_ Posts: 993 Member
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    I never flirted or hit on a women in my life and I just turned 33 last Friday.I just figure since I am fat and in my mind ugly that they would think it would be weird or creepy but I am also really shy as well so I live in my head and talk myself out of it.It takes courage to go up to a women.Women for some reason don't do it but they have the pick of the litter as we men just wait in line.

    Trust me, looks have nothing to do with it. There are a number of gorgeous men who can just be creepy as hell in the way that they approach women.

    Yup. Plus some gorgeous men know they are gorgeous and come off cocky. Confidence is hot, cockiness not so much. Don't come up to me and act like I'm a done deal. When I was single if that happened I would ensure I was definitely off limits to them. Some shyness is actually a turn on for me. My husband was shy, I was the one who asked him for his number, he could barely look at me lol. It showed me that he didn't think he was God's gift to women and that he was aware that maybe he wasn't my type. Guys who think they are everyone's type are just gross. And there are plenty of women out there like this too. It's not just men who have these *kitten* walking around. Lol
  • mrfreestyle
    mrfreestyle Posts: 1,293 Member
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    I never flirted or hit on a women in my life and I just turned 33 last Friday.I just figure since I am fat and in my mind ugly that they would think it would be weird or creepy but I am also really shy as well so I live in my head and talk myself out of it.It takes courage to go up to a women.Women for some reason don't do it but they have the pick of the litter as we men just wait in line.

    Trust me, looks have nothing to do with it. There are a number of gorgeous men who can just be creepy as hell in the way that they approach women.

    I do agree with your second point that good looking men can be just as creepy, but not with your first point though. Looks do play a huge role in how women, and men admittedly respond to flirting.
  • _Lovely77_
    _Lovely77_ Posts: 993 Member
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    I personally enjoy it. However, I am married and freely state so on here, plus my husband is also actively involved on mfp so nothing is hidden from him and vise versa, so some flirting, most is fine but I can't stand it when someone clearly crosses that line knowing I am married and my husband can see these comments. And the average flirting isn't an issue, I know he gets flirted with and he knows that I do too... we realize that being attracted to other people and being attractive to others is inevitable. We definitely greet this with open arms, plus it's a good reminder that even though you're happily married you still got it. You don't lose your identity as just a wife/husband mother/father. You're still an individual and a damn sexy one at that.

    I flirt with both of you often! :bigsmile:

    Yes you do and we love ya for it :blushing:
  • Silentfool
    Silentfool Posts: 189 Member
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    Innocent flirting and being hit on is certainly fun and flattering. There is a fine line though between flirty and creepy though.

    I think some people just tend to be flirty in their interactions in general.

    It makes me smile and feel special

    :happy:
  • mrfreestyle
    mrfreestyle Posts: 1,293 Member
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    I never flirted or hit on a women in my life and I just turned 33 last Friday.I just figure since I am fat and in my mind ugly that they would think it would be weird or creepy but I am also really shy as well so I live in my head and talk myself out of it.It takes courage to go up to a women.Women for some reason don't do it but they have the pick of the litter as we men just wait in line.

    Trust me, looks have nothing to do with it. There are a number of gorgeous men who can just be creepy as hell in the way that they approach women.

    I do agree with your second point that good looking men can be just as creepy, but not with your first point though. Let's not kid ourselves, looks do play a huge role in how women, and men admittedly respond to flirting.
  • brianmccon
    brianmccon Posts: 2 Member
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    My wife had a lot of people on here hitting on her then asking her to kik with them where they would ask for nude photos. Watch out for these trolls.
  • _Lovely77_
    _Lovely77_ Posts: 993 Member
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    My wife had a lot of people on here hitting on her then asking her to kik with them where they would ask for nude photos. Watch out for these trolls.

    This does happen but not in abundance like you're making it out to be. Not trying to make things worst for you but honestly, I found that most of that type of flirting is cause and effect on here. People rarely come out of nowhere asking for this. Usually it's because they were led to believe that was not on their "off limit" list. I mean don't get me wrong, there are definitely a few here and there that ask and they were never given the impression that it was ok. But, it's not common everyday thing to go from stranger to asking for nudes right off the bat. Usually some heavy flirting and lack of boundaries occurs prior to that. I'm married and I make that obvious to everyone, it's on my "about me" section and I don't pm hardly at all, and I've had only the occasional creeps very rare. In fact, I don't even think I've ever been asked to kik and/or send nudes. Idk maybe all that means is I'm a troll and no one would want to see all that anyways.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,793 Member
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    I get flirted with, but rarely. I never get hit on.

    I flirt, innocently, and usually in a humorous way, but I never hit on anyone.
  • msbunnie68
    msbunnie68 Posts: 1,894 Member
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    I flirt within reason. I state my line in the sand very clearly. I have my husband's full knowledge and his blessing.

    He likes me spicy. It's all a little confidence building fun.

    Flirty =/= pornographic.
  • LC458
    LC458 Posts: 300 Member
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    I always assume people who hit on me are trying to sell me something, trying to rob me, or wants me to join their cult.

    Lmao^^^^ totally!!!

    In all seriousness there are appropriate ways and then there are just major pervs. :noway:
  • msbunnie68
    msbunnie68 Posts: 1,894 Member
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    I admit I've flirted on here and been flirted back, married and single. All in good fun, teasing, joking, stoking each others fire and everybody feels good. Ive never offended or been offended, respect has always been shown both ways.
    In reality the chance of ever meeting that person are ziltch so enjoy the banter.

    Agree that nobody especially the ladies need to put up with creepy, rude messages and no means no. Block is your friend.

    Just respect the other person and have fun.

    Now where is my flirt ladies :wink: :flowerforyou:

    present.

    but wait...I thought we had a date in real life??? You mean...you don't want me :sad:
  • runnergirl0721
    runnergirl0721 Posts: 2,289 Member
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    In truth, I never actually believe people hit on me in real life. I'm not that girl who thinks that every guy who talks to me thinks I'm hot. Flirting is fun, but I will say that it can be taken to an extreme on MFP. Whether you love it or hate it, you never know who is going to find what you say offensive or if someone will think it's an opening for them to do something in return. My rule for myself is that if i wouldn't do it in real life, I shouldn't do it on the internet.

    I think as long as you're respectful and mindful of the other person or people, a little harmless flirting is ok. It does make people feel good about themselves and will make them smile :)
  • MrTolerable
    MrTolerable Posts: 1,593 Member
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    It is a major ego booster when they come to me, sometimes back when I was in the bar scene it would be a little weird though having ladies in their 30's and up though offering to buy me a drink... however one can get desensitized to this.

    - its neat as well because it gets most people out of their comfort zone so they are mentally more sharp and alert - aka the jokes are much more witty than usual and the sexual tension can get a lil thick.
  • miss_jessiejane
    miss_jessiejane Posts: 2,820 Member
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    I usually assume people are just being nice and not flirting. The last guy that hit on me had to flat out tell me he was asking me out. I just thought he wanted advice on restaurants.
  • MuscleHeadNerd74
    MuscleHeadNerd74 Posts: 1,930 Member
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    You love nerds? lol I have actually been called a musclehead nerd lol by my friend at work
  • scarrletti_girl
    scarrletti_girl Posts: 479 Member
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    oh the get in your pants kind??? umm yeah that is extremely annoying and inappropriate. but the harmless flirtation i don't mind. lol but yeah just depends on the person i suppose.
  • jaxass
    jaxass Posts: 2,128 Member
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    That makes two of us, Tanned.:ohwell:
  • AglaeaC
    AglaeaC Posts: 1,974 Member
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    I never flirted or hit on a women in my life and I just turned 33 last Friday.I just figure since I am fat and in my mind ugly that they would think it would be weird or creepy but I am also really shy as well so I live in my head and talk myself out of it.It takes courage to go up to a women.Women for some reason don't do it but they have the pick of the litter as we men just wait in line.
    You know, I have no idea where you got that idea from. The same way as there are men with low self-esteem, there are plenty of women who think like that, too. I was always the tall or the ugly or the less petite or less outgoing/bubbly type next to my friends. Plus I am blessed with a so-called resting b1tchface; people sometimes ask me why I'm mad and then I was simply pondering something in peace and quiet. That in combination with my extremely guarded, sensitive and serious personality doesn't lend itself well to being hit on in bars.

    My male friends have had a good time with me on the dance floor, but very few guys have ever tried to "pick me up"; I can count them on one hand. There's a messed up marriage and a string of awkward dating in my past, but the whole theory on having men waiting in line is someone else's life, not mine. In fact, an old classmate said a few weeks ago that he finally saw a new, more open side to me, because when we grew up I was always so guarded. All of a sudden I saw my whole childhood and youth in a whole new perspective and while I had had some of those thought already beforehand, now I'm certain most of my social difficulties regarding the opposite sex simply stem from my own insecurities and distorted self-image. I've done a lot of work to become more secure and these days I view myself as someone, who has something to offer to someone special, but it's been a long road with quite a few tears.

    Maybe you shouldn't overthink the "talking to women" part, but simply do what you love to do and meet people, be they women or men, through a common interest and take it from there. Everyone who is passionate about something can talk for hours on end about that topic and you just have to find someone who gets you. The eyes are the window to one's soul? Passionate people are beautiful and attractive to others, no matter what they talk about.

    ETA
    Re "the ulgy", that was up in my head. With my excess fat gone and a healthy, strong body created, I could go for a model in some fitness magazine. I just thought I was really ugly when I grew up. How sad is that. When I look in the mirror these days I still see "her" and I don't think much of myself, but when I force myself to be objective, the truth doesn't match at all my inner image of myself.

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