vent--There are too many skinny people at the gym
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ROLL!
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If only the test for offensiveness was what personally offended me and only me. I suppose I could also create a hierarchy of offensiveness for everyone to use and then expect everyone else to adhere to it...
...but that would just be silly, right?
Well said as usual. I'd be interested in the hierarchy of offensiveness according to Jof.
That said, the more I think about it, since we are talking about personal offences, I think I'd rather be called a whale than a trophy wife. At least as a whale, it is only a reflection of my outside appearance, which I can change. The term trophy wife means that people view me as having nothing to offer, no worth other than looks.
I know what you mean, but for this particular instance, there's nothing someone in gym can know about you from observation beyond your appearance anyway. So calling someone a trophy wife doesn't even really mean anything beyond "pretty" (in a more b****y way of course) because the observer can not possibly know the intricacies of the woman's personal life.
That's why I don't see it as a harsh insult in this circumstance - and it's not like a specific person was outed by name as being a trophy wife. But anyway, I've probably exhausted this conversation. My main point is just that people are insecure and they say things without meaning them all the time - so the vitriol directed towards TC seemed excessive, but eh.
Insults to the mind and person cut deeper for me than to physicality. But, with that said, I do agree that her post was innocuous in it being generalized. She did not attack an individual. I found it to be more about her insecurity. Something that can be remedied with an understanding approach. People were responding in an oversensitive way, and caused the topic to spiral into many more emotional directions.
The majority response was my knee-jerk reaction as well. But, when I saw the pile on it did cause me to reflect on it instead.0 -
If only the test for offensiveness was what personally offended me and only me. I suppose I could also create a hierarchy of offensiveness for everyone to use and then expect everyone else to adhere to it...
...but that would just be silly, right?
Well said as usual. I'd be interested in the hierarchy of offensiveness according to Jof.
That said, the more I think about it, since we are talking about personal offences, I think I'd rather be called a whale than a trophy wife. At least as a whale, it is only a reflection of my outside appearance, which I can change. The term trophy wife means that people view me as having nothing to offer, no worth other than looks.
I know what you mean, but for this particular instance, there's nothing someone in gym can know about you from observation beyond your appearance anyway. So calling someone a trophy wife doesn't even really mean anything beyond "pretty" (in a more b****y way of course) because the observer can not possibly know the intricacies of the woman's personal life.
That's why I don't see it as a harsh insult in this circumstance - and it's not like a specific person was outed by name as being a trophy wife. But anyway, I've probably exhausted this conversation. My main point is just that people are insecure and they say things without meaning them all the time - so the vitriol directed towards TC seemed excessive, but eh.
Insults to the mind and person cut deeper for me than to physicality. But, with that said, I do agree that her post was innocuous in it being generalized. She did not attack an individual. I found it to be more about her insecurity. Something that can be remedied with an understanding approach. People were responding in an oversensitive way, and caused the topic to spiral into many more emotional directions.
Exactly my point, I completely agree, thank you! SO glad someone understood what I was getting at.0 -
If only the test for offensiveness was what personally offended me and only me. I suppose I could also create a hierarchy of offensiveness for everyone to use and then expect everyone else to adhere to it...
...but that would just be silly, right?
Well said as usual. I'd be interested in the hierarchy of offensiveness according to Jof.
That said, the more I think about it, since we are talking about personal offences, I think I'd rather be called a whale than a trophy wife. At least as a whale, it is only a reflection of my outside appearance, which I can change. The term trophy wife means that people view me as having nothing to offer, no worth other than looks.
I know what you mean, but for this particular instance, there's nothing someone in gym can know about you from observation beyond your appearance anyway. So calling someone a trophy wife doesn't even really mean anything beyond "pretty" (in a more b****y way of course) because the observer can not possibly know the intricacies of the woman's personal life.
That's why I don't see it as a harsh insult in this circumstance - and it's not like a specific person was outed by name as being a trophy wife. But anyway, I've probably exhausted this conversation. My main point is just that people are insecure and they say things without meaning them all the time - so the vitriol directed towards TC seemed excessive, but eh.
Insults to the mind and person cut deeper for me than to physicality. But, with that said, I do agree that her post was innocuous in it being generalized. She did not attack an individual. I found it to be more about her insecurity. Something that can be remedied with an understanding approach. People were responding in an oversensitive way, and caused the topic to spiral into many more emotional directions.
Exactly my point, I completely agree, thank you! SO glad someone understood what I was getting at.
I understand.
I just disagree. I presume I'm allowed to disagree without one assuming I don't understand.0 -
The majority response was my knee-jerk reaction as well, but when I saw the pile on it caused me to reflect more.0
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The majority response was my knee-jerk reaction as well, but when I saw the pile on it caused me to reflect more.
I'm not fond of letting the actions of others sway me from my own personal reactions. That seems awfully close to being contrary for the sake of going against the grain, tbh.0 -
The majority response was my knee-jerk reaction as well, but when I saw the pile on it caused me to reflect more.
I'm not fond of letting the actions of others sway me from my own personal reactions. That seems awfully close to being contrary for the sake of going against the grain, tbh.
Lol, because you are never contrary.
And no. It causes me to think about it more deeply instead of joking it off. The first point was made. So, I think.0 -
This post made me face palm.
"Skinny people" have just as much right to go to ANY GYM that they want to, the same as with overweight people.
Don't thin shame!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why do you care as to what they look like? It's not your business what the other people look like.
Just focus on yourself and don't care about other's looks.0 -
I actually only hate it when the gym is filled with people who use MFP. The place where "would you screw the person who posted above you" threads are a-ok, but "I feel insecure going to the gym" threads are followed by eighteen pages of "you're just jealous" posts and humblebrags.
By comparison, meathead and trophy wife are fairly innocuous.
Actually those threads all all suck too. But if you post in there complaining about it people would just rate you. Can't stop an avalanche by shaking your fist at it.0 -
If I don't see people saying "people are judging me at the gym" I see "I'm judging people at the gym"! Where does it end?0
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A person can be capable of having a complexity of thoughts all at once, and of having flexibility. Not just one thought that never grows or shifts or is flexible. I'm always thinking, learning, processing, growing.0
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And how would you feel if a gym excluded you for being fat?
Stop being jealous and bitter. Worry about you.
This.
Just because her fragile lil fee fees are hurt the poor thing.
She expects people to not go to the gym..
The OP needs to just stop thin shaming and mind her own damn business.
Hell, if I was at the gym with her and she told me that I was "too thin to be there", I would deck her in her jaw (and rightfully so)
It's not her place to judge!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!0 -
People on here are so quick to jump to conclusions with very little information.0
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A person can be capable of having a complexity of thoughts all at once, and of having flexibility. Not just one thought that never grows or shifts or is flexible. I'm always thinking, learning, processing, growing.
:huh:
Okay then?0 -
People on here are so quick to jump to conclusions with very little information.
THE OP IS THIN SHAMING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!0 -
If I don't see people saying "people are judging me at the gym" I see "I'm judging people at the gym"! Where does it end?
in on 20.
It doesn't. If you judge, you always think people are judging you.
see what happens there?0 -
People on here are so quick to jump to conclusions with very little information.
THE OP IS THIN SHAMING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The exclamations just made your point so much more apparent.0 -
People on here are so quick to jump to conclusions with very little information.
What conclusions are being jumped too?0 -
Yes, you're being silly. 1. You don't know if these people were once 25 + pounds overweight themselves. 2. They don't care that you are overweight. 3. If anything they admire you for exercising to try to lose weight. 4. While there may be a few jerks at your gym, jerks can be found anywhere, and thankfully they are few and far between. 5. The problem is the way you perceive yourself, not the way others perceive you. 6. People who are in shape continue to workout to stay in shape.
So look at them, study how they workout and learn from them.0 -
A person can be capable of having a complexity of thoughts all at once, and of having flexibility. Not just one thought that never grows or shifts or is flexible. I'm always thinking, learning, processing, growing.
:huh:
Okay then?
Sorry. It was a follow up to Achrya not understanding how my thought processes go. I have also just returned from dinner and had a lemon drop martini.0
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