Not tonight honey, a Friends re-run is on....
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Moo moo dog face in the banana patch.0
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Wha? Just get a divorce already. Lol. Totally ridiculous and pathetic that he kept a spreadsheet, wtf, use your words like a big boy. Also, entitlement attitude much? Also absurd and rude of her to share it, unless it was the final straw and she's divorcing him. If your wife turns you down for sex all the time it is very likely because you suck at it, jes saying. Many men (not all or course and thank god) don't get that intimacy for women starts long before we're in the bedroom, with the little things, hand holding, the sweet compliment, the spontaneous date or flowers, helping out with a few chores or the kids if you have them, and then making sure you aren't the only one who finishes once your there. Reading about stuff like this overwhelms me with gratitude for my man, and I make damn sure he knows it. You're partner doesn't owe you sex, but if you communicate and learn what gets them wanting it, you'll have a lot more of it than this dbag.
I like you :flowerforyou:0 -
From what I saw on the news last night - they are both 25 and have been married for about 2 years. Something seems a bit off. And I think the husband IS trying to communicate that he sees an issue. Maybe it would have been better if there was his side of the data in the spreadsheet... but seriously, her going public with it makes her the jerk in this equation.
Also, I'm with Brett on this one. SO glad I'm not married.
Ok... to all the guys out there that are using this as fuel for their "never settle down" fire...
I swear not all women are like this!
This woman is a horrible wife, and soon hopefully be a horrible divorcee...
I think most men who believe in never settle down are comical.0 -
Crap spreadsheet in my opinion.
No charts, no conditional formatting, no formulae.
I'll construct a better template0 -
Crap spreadsheet in my opinion.
No charts, no conditional formatting, no formulae.
I'll construct a better template
This guy gets it. The yes should at LEAST be color coded or something.0 -
4. Relationships are supposed to be a good thing. But sex is NOT an obligation. A woman should not feel "lucky" her partner wants her. A m,an should not feel "lucky" that his partner wants him. The two should feel fortunate to have a wonderful partnership that sometimes leads to some hot banging.
Sex IS an obligation in marriage. Period. Yes, there are going to be times when either partner is not in the mood for whatever reason. But when that is the norm rather than the exception, that partner is not upholding part of their end of the relationship. And if that partner is going to continue to withold, they should feel damn lucky their spouse continues to show interest in it.
As commedian once said: "I married you. You are it. It's not like I can run down the street and say 'Ms. Johnson, I'm not getting any p***y. Can I have some of yours?' "
I do not know anyone living a sexless marriage. You know why because it does not happen.0 -
From what I saw on the news last night - they are both 25 and have been married for about 2 years. Something seems a bit off. And I think the husband IS trying to communicate that he sees an issue. Maybe it would have been better if there was his side of the data in the spreadsheet... but seriously, her going public with it makes her the jerk in this equation.
Also, I'm with Brett on this one. SO glad I'm not married.
Ok... to all the guys out there that are using this as fuel for their "never settle down" fire...
I swear not all women are like this!
This woman is a horrible wife, and soon hopefully be a horrible divorcee...
I think most men who believe in never settle down are comical.
Meh. If that's all it takes to turn them off marriage, they should probably not get married.0 -
From what I saw on the news last night - they are both 25 and have been married for about 2 years. Something seems a bit off. And I think the husband IS trying to communicate that he sees an issue. Maybe it would have been better if there was his side of the data in the spreadsheet... but seriously, her going public with it makes her the jerk in this equation.
Also, I'm with Brett on this one. SO glad I'm not married.
Ok... to all the guys out there that are using this as fuel for their "never settle down" fire...
I swear not all women are like this!
This woman is a horrible wife, and soon hopefully be a horrible divorcee...
That seems like a pretty large leap.
Sex is important but it's not the only important thing. And not wanting it doesn't make one a horrible person. There could be tons of reasons why she isn't willing more often.
Possibly, but now that I'm 30 and single, I've got a pool of single 30-something's to chose from %99.9 of whom refuse to ever re-marry because either
A) Their previous marriage was just like this or worse
or
All their buddies marriages (or previous marriages) are just like this or worse
None of them believe me that not all women are like this, they've been burned too hard in the past.
In the event that the list is real, and that she had a serious medical issue every single night, but he recorded it as re-runs, than yes, that is a stretch.
If she's is truly saying no for these silly excuses, than I do believe she is a horrible wife.
I mean, if it was really sore, she could do it another way FFS
She seems to be completely neglecting his needs, to me.
So selfish.
And he'll be in my 30's single's pool again going "Nope, never, ever, ever, ever again."
Everyone got baggage.0 -
instead of making spreadsheets why didnt he just sit down with his wife and ask her if something was up? something he's maybe doing wrong etc...0
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instead of making spreadsheets why didnt he just sit down with his wife and ask her if something was up? something he's maybe doing wrong etc...
He needs to be asking how to step up his oral skills. Then again 5 years and 2 year marriage. You don't know what your S.O. likes yet.0 -
We'll shut up when you thaw out.I'm sorry this is crap.
Men and women both turn eachother down.
I'm sick of people painting it like it's always always the cold ice princess wife. Shut up.
YES, I AGREE 100%0 -
There are a lot of interesting views on this subject here. But the truth remains that about half of all marriages end in divorce in the US. If most of you are from the US, then is it safe to assume that half of you have a mistaken opinion on what makes a successful marriage?
Flame bait, or sadly real opinion?
It was a question.
soooooo... if I am not from the US does that make me Right? :bigsmile:0 -
Crap spreadsheet in my opinion.
No charts, no conditional formatting, no formulae.
I'll construct a better template
This guy gets it. The yes should at LEAST be color coded or something.
Not difficult is it, to set a cell green if its yes, or red if its anything different.
And perhaps some drop downs for the reasons.
Oh, and if cell equals yes, performance rating 1-100 -
I don't blame him given half her reasons and all she did by posting it was make herself look bad.0
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4. Relationships are supposed to be a good thing. But sex is NOT an obligation. A woman should not feel "lucky" her partner wants her. A m,an should not feel "lucky" that his partner wants him. The two should feel fortunate to have a wonderful partnership that sometimes leads to some hot banging.
Sex IS an obligation in marriage. Period. Yes, there are going to be times when either partner is not in the mood for whatever reason. But when that is the norm rather than the exception, that partner is not upholding part of their end of the relationship. And if that partner is going to continue to withold, they should feel damn lucky their spouse continues to show interest in it.
As commedian once said: "I married you. You are it. It's not like I can run down the street and say 'Ms. Johnson, I'm not getting any p***y. Can I have some of yours?' "
I do not know anyone living a sexless marriage. You know why because it does not happen.
It most definitely does happen! Usually in longer married couples who have allowed themselves to drift apart emotionally and physically. They may not be happily married, they may not be emotionally connected, but they stay married. I personally know of two couples, one has been married for 22 years and one has been married for 24 years. They drifted apart emotionally, but they stay married, because that's what you do (in their minds).
A marriage needs to be nurtured. A husband needs to know that he's loved and desired (and respected) by his wife. A wife needs to know the same. My husband tells me several times a week that he thinks I am beautiful. We tell each other I love you several times a day. I leave him a note most mornings by the coffee pot telling him how much he means to me. That's why we aren't like those two couples we know. We are intimate at least 2-3 times a week after being together for 24 years. Because we both need the connection emotionally we get, besides all the other pluses of whoopie.0 -
Being passive-aggressive is never the answer. How did he think this was going to help the situation in the first place?
It's called C-O-M-M-U-N-I-C-A-T-I-O-N. & this isn't it.
Really? I think he probably took this measure because she probably denied how often she said no in the past. He decided to make a sheet to prove his point. It's not passive aggressive.
Btw, this guy doesn't seem entitled to me. She seems to be. Reaps all the benefits of marriage without holding up her end of the bargain. He's a husband propositioning his wife for sex. Perfectly well within reason, imo. You don't need to do it every night but three times in six weeks?! You don't need to actually have sex either. If you feel gross, tell him, then offer to do something else. It works (and to men, counts as sex) and isn't a lot of effort.
This woman is a real b*tch for posting their private info online. What did she hope to accomplish?0 -
I'm sorry this is crap.
Men and women both turn eachother down.
When does a man turn a woman down for sex,?????0 -
About 10 minutes in.
Come on folks that is funny!0 -
Yeah....this thread disturbs me a little....actually, a lot. Not getting sex does not give anyone the right to degrade their partner for not wanting sex. My husband and I have been married for 8 years. During those 8 years there have been months where I didn't want to be intimate very often, as there were also months where he didn't want to be intimate very often. Acting as though your partner is somehow flawed or less amazing just because they don't want to have sex is absolutely inappropriate. That being said, issues in that department should definitely be discussed or worked out. People get tired, people get depressed, people are on meds that interfere with libido, people have experienced past sexual abuses that color their desire for sex, people are multifaceted and deserve a lot more understanding and a lot less disrespect than this couple seems to be showing each other. IF there was a mutual respect in this relationship, the man wouldn't have made that stupid, petty spreadsheet and the woman wouldn't have posted it online. They would be figuring this out instead and be keeping it a lot less public.
You hit the nail on the head0 -
I like how a six week dry spell is grounds for having an extramarital affair.
Right?!?
This0 -
Well a woman making her husband feel like he has to beg for it, completely disturbs his ability to feel respected and appreciated by his partner. The spreadsheet was not most likely a whim, but probably came from years of this rejection. The premise that both people need time sometimes is total bunk in this situation as the spreadsheet chronicles his pursuit of his wife and rejection over and over again.
In a marriage couples belong to each other, it is when they start thinking of themselves and forget the other person in the relationship that pain like this comes out. No one remembers who threw the first punch, but both are bloody and beat by the end of the fight.0 -
...and now there is another spreadsheet going around... :laugh:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/07/24/spreadsheet_0_n_5618005.html?ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000063
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:laugh:Wow, for a moment I thought it said HE wore a teddy to bed and was wondering why someone had the spreadsheet about my ex.0
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About 10 minutes in.
Come on folks that is funny!
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:laugh:Wow, for a moment I thought it said HE wore a teddy to bed and was wondering why someone had the spreadsheet about my ex.
Hahaha0 -
My spreadsheet would be so boring.
He initiated, we had super hot time, every, single, day.
Except Wednesdays. We don't spend the night together on Wednesdays.0 -
Being passive-aggressive is never the answer. How did he think this was going to help the situation in the first place?
It's called C-O-M-M-U-N-I-C-A-T-I-O-N. & this isn't it.
Really? I think he probably took this measure because she probably denied how often she said no in the past. He decided to make a sheet to prove his point. It's not passive aggressive.
Btw, this guy doesn't seem entitled to me. She seems to be. Reaps all the benefits of marriage without holding up her end of the bargain. He's a husband propositioning his wife for sex. Perfectly well within reason, imo. You don't need to do it every night but three times in six weeks?! You don't need to actually have sex either. If you feel gross, tell him, then offer to do something else. It works (and to men, counts as sex) and isn't a lot of effort.
This woman is a real b*tch for posting their private info online. What did she hope to accomplish?
You might want to read up on the definition of passive aggressive there, dear. Because what he did here fits the description perfectly.
I do agree that the woman is nuts for posting it online. That will and did help nothing. That was a punitive move-nothing more-and a poor one at that, because it so obviously blew up in her face. Both parties are very much at fault here, and they seem to be incompetent communicators.0 -
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/communication-success/201401/how-spot-and-deal-passive-aggressive-people
The NYU Medical Center defines a passive-aggressive individual as someone who "may appear to comply or act appropriately, but actually behaves negatively and passively resists." Passive- aggressive actions can range from the relatively mild, such as making excuses for not getting together, to the very serious, such as sabotaging someone’s well-being and success.
Most chronically passive-aggressive individuals have four common characteristics: They’re unreasonable to deal with, they’re uncomfortable to experience, they rarely express their hostility directly, and they repeat their subterfuge behavior over time. Passive aggressiveness may be directed towards a person or a group.0 -
My spreadsheet would be so boring.
He initiated, we had super hot time, every, single, day.
Except Wednesdays. We don't spend the night together on Wednesdays.
Jelly - ugh...0 -
Did my wife really release our spreadsheet?!?!? She is in big trouble when I get home0
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