Sarcastic Heifer

DanaLash

Hey Ya'll,

So, this is like, my 4th try at this dealie. For some reason I finally feel the motivation to take this seriously this time. My best friend, who is slightly heavier than me was prescribed adipex and a pretty strict diet by her doctor. She is following it to the letter. I'm jealous of her dedication. I'm jealous of her medication, too. I feel like she has a leg up on me. And let's be honest, she does. It's unfair, really. Anyway...I have three kids who I love more than life itself. But they TRASHED my body. I'm 5'1" and currently 181 pounds. I've lost 3 pounds in 2 days. I haven't really exercised that much. I did some stairs today. But that's it. Mostly I've just been eating really healthy. That alone has been killing me. I'm convinced that white hot rage burns a lot of calories. Like, watching my husband pig out on Doritos right in front of me and using all of my self-control to not kick him in the throat...that had to have burnt off a pound or two. Or making macaroni and cheese for my two year old for lunch and not "helping her" finish it? That type of restraint has to count as a work out.

Anyway, I'm looking for accountability pals. But, be forewarned. I'm super sarcastic. I'm not a real touchy-feely kind of person. But, I'll encourage you as much as I can and you can remind me not to eat nacho cheese! Yay!

Alluminati

Would you like some cheese with that whine?

DanaLash

No, cheese isn't part of my diet, but I would like some wine with my celery, please.

MiaisMIAinMiami

I too really need someone to keep my cheese addiction in check!

PayneAS

Cheese is my Kryptonite...

vlland

wine and celery??? talk about getting in ur daily serving of fruits and vegetables. i myself prefer rum and diet coke but im not sure either of them fit into a food group. I like ur sarcasm Im sure laughing burns some calories - so thank u for helping me burn that extra 20 calories i needed.

KiwipowaRoo

I find it so hard not to eat my 2 year olds food!!!
You don't have to deprive yourself of everything! In fact, that is often a cause of people falling off
Can you make your kids healthy dinners and eat with them instead of your hubby?

Have you looked into Tdee and BMR?

SaintGiff

Just so much "No" here.

No, your friend doesn't have a leg up because of the adipex.
No, you should not be jealous of her meds.
No, your kids didn't trash your body.
No, you're probably not ready to take it seriously this time.

All of which is fine. Almost anyone who has had real success at this will tell you that they had a dozen false starts. You fake it til you make it. You go through the motions until it clicks. You'll know it clicked when you wake up and realize that none of that ****, not the meds or the kids or husband with the Doritos, none of it matters. There are a million perfectly valid reasons to do it right tomorrow. There are a million perfectly valid reasons not to. It's not about the reasons. All that matters is which side of the ledger you choose your reasons from when you wake up in the morning. The rest is just mental and emotional *kitten*.

SheGlows

Just so much "No" here.

No, your friend doesn't have a leg up because of the adipex.
No, you should not be jealous of her meds.
No, your kids didn't trash your body.

+1 for these points^

jennifurballs

From www.caloriecount.about.com

A hearty guffaw will burn more calories than a nervous titter, but researchers at Vanderbilt University found adults burn an average of 1.3 calories per minute while laughing with their friends. That’s about the same number of calories you burn while taking notes in a classroom or standing and talking on the phone. But laughter has other benefits besides burning calories, including relief of emotional stress and a workout for the muscles of the diaphragm, abdomen, back, and shoulders. Read about the benefits of laughter from the Guide to Stress Management at About.com.


What's a titter???

Myhaloslipped

I find your candor delightfully amusing.

jessemach

I find your candor delightfully amusing.

I second that.

SandyBVTN

I'm convinced that white hot rage burns a lot of calories. Like, watching my husband pig out on Doritos right in front of me and using all of my self-control to not kick him in the throat...that had to have burnt off a pound or two.

I love it!

I'm also a part of the No Macaroni Leftovers Club. It's the devil. About the husband though, the chip thing is really hard for me and I have asked hubs to not bring them into the house. It's been my only real request and I think it's made things easier for me. I would kick a puppy for some Doritos right now though.

Please feel free to friend me here. We have pretty similar goals. Cheers:)

_BearNecessities_

I prefer tiny vulgar unicorn to sarcastic heifer. TVU is funnier and less whiny.

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Tiny-Vulgar-Unicorn/451299378338775

radario

Just so much "No" here.

No, your friend doesn't have a leg up because of the adipex.
No, you should not be jealous of her meds.
No, your kids didn't trash your body.
No, you're probably not ready to take it seriously this time.

All of which is fine. Almost anyone who has had real success at this will tell you that they had a dozen false starts. You fake it til you make it. You go through the motions until it clicks. You'll know it clicked when you wake up and realize that none of that ****, not the meds or the kids or husband with the Doritos, none of it matters. There are a million perfectly valid reasons to do it right tomorrow. There are a million perfectly valid reasons not to. It's not about the reasons. All that matters is which side of the ledger you choose your reasons from when you wake up in the morning. The rest is just mental and emotional *kitten*.

God I LOVE this post even more than I love cheese and finishing my 2 year old's food! I said all the right things for ages but I didn't actually do them til I felt a spark that turned into a fire inside.

Nachos happen and that's fine but do you want them to control you!? Turn that around. Now. As for your friend's super strict diet (sure, that's sustainable!), you'll be ready when you don't even jokingly feel the slightest bit of jealousy. Maybe that is now and if so, welcome aboard, great move!

_SantaClause

So you're doing everything, EXCEPT holding yourself accountable for your actions.

Got it.

randomtai

Just so much "No" here.

No, your friend doesn't have a leg up because of the adipex.
No, you should not be jealous of her meds.
No, your kids didn't trash your body.
No, you're probably not ready to take it seriously this time.

All of which is fine. Almost anyone who has had real success at this will tell you that they had a dozen false starts. You fake it til you make it. You go through the motions until it clicks. You'll know it clicked when you wake up and realize that none of that ****, not the meds or the kids or husband with the Doritos, none of it matters. There are a million perfectly valid reasons to do it right tomorrow. There are a million perfectly valid reasons not to. It's not about the reasons. All that matters is which side of the ledger you choose your reasons from when you wake up in the morning. The rest is just mental and emotional *kitten*.

QFT!

w734q672

So you're doing everything, EXCEPT holding yourself accountable for your actions.

Got it.

Exactly

DanaLash

Wow...are you guys serious with this? Here is the deal...I didn't come to YOU asking for advice or getting up in your business. I am perfectly accountable for my own actions. I am fat because I eat and don't exercise. I happen to be snarky and sarcastic. You're super adorable with your trolling, really. Precious, even. Lol.

Mischievous_Rascal

Wow...are you guys serious with this ****? Here is the deal...I didn't come to YOU asking for advice or getting up in your business. I am perfectly accountable for my own actions. I am fat because I eat like **** and don't exercise. I happen to be snarky and sarcastic. You're super adorable with your trolling, really. Precious, even. Lol.

These peeps aren't trolls, hun. They've all been through what you're going through right now. When you posted this "...be forewarned. I'm super sarcastic. I'm not a real touchy-feely kind of person..." it's like you asked for the tough love that's such a great part of this community. They're just keeping it real.

PS: S_G is the man, just saying...

wagglesworth

Your post is spot on. I like it and agree with you. Took me probably a hundred restarts until something clicked in my head and now it doesn't matter who or what's going on. I'm not giving up and I'm determined to get my life back.