BOYFRIEND HELP!!!!! THINKS ABOUT HIS EX

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  • cingle87
    cingle87 Posts: 717 Member
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    Most people have already covered my points on this, after being with someone for 7yrs its impossible for him to forget about her, look at it like a plus point he told you what he's thinking, most guys wont do that.
  • GDLAZ
    GDLAZ Posts: 3,785 Member
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    It's perfectly normal to think about an X, especially if you were together for a long time. Most mature people though realize that your current significant other probably doesn't want to hear about. Tell him to keep his thoughts to himself...
  • boxpunk
    boxpunk Posts: 52 Member
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    so he thinks about her. so what? he's with you. Been married 5 years and from time to time I'll think about my ex. it just happens. and from going from 7 years with one person to 2 months with a new person, that time isn't going top be erased. just remember, he's with you.
  • pythagarus
    pythagarus Posts: 16
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    I still think about my 9th grade biology teacher. I just wouldn't tell the woman I loved about her though.
  • RavenLibra
    RavenLibra Posts: 1,737 Member
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    He's an idiot... for sharing that thought with you... for that alone you should breakup with him... YOU don't want to be heart broken? THEN Stay away from relationships... OR is loneliness worse? What is life without love? what is life without someone to share it with? without someone to hold hands with... kiss... someone to squeeze during a scary movie... someone to share the most magnificent firsts with??? Heartbreak is WORTH the risk if it means having those moment... LOVE is living life in full blown Technicolor... so tuck your insecurities away... and consider yourself fblessed.. that HE felt comfortable enough with you... to risk... having you share in his thoughts..
  • hajenkatt
    hajenkatt Posts: 331 Member
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    I recommend picking up the book, "How To Avoid Falling In Love With a Jerk" by John Van Epp. You can get it on amazon used for just four bucks.

    Someone should pick up a copy for her boyfriend.
  • JeriAnne84
    JeriAnne84 Posts: 543 Member
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    I want to know how long him and his ex have been broken up!!!!!!!!! And what context him thinking about his ex was brought up in. OP please answer!! Stop having a life and get on the internet!!! lol
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    I didn't read the comments. And I kind of have a hard time believing this is for real. But, anyway. It's completely normal to think about lovers and partners from the past. And he was even honest and told you. And you have only been together for two months. Give it some time. Things are going to go much better if you do not get jealous over little things like this.
  • dMonster01
    dMonster01 Posts: 214 Member
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    If you can't control each others thoughts, your relationship is doomed to fail.
  • GDLAZ
    GDLAZ Posts: 3,785 Member
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    If you can't control each others thoughts, your relationship is doomed to fail.

    Ha ha! Where's that darn like button?
  • Lisa1971
    Lisa1971 Posts: 3,069 Member
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    Hon, you need to relax. Nothing will drive a guy away quicker than a clingy, insecure woman.

    He was with her for 7 years. He DID have a life before you came along. That doesn't mean he doesn't love you, just means that sometimes he thinks about people he used to know.

    THIS!
  • JONZ64
    JONZ64 Posts: 1,280 Member
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    If you can't control each others thoughts, your relationship is doomed to fail.
    :drinker: :love:
  • JT_Taylor99
    JT_Taylor99 Posts: 148
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    I think about my ex from time to time but I don't act out and try reaching out to her. I think it's normal to remember the good as well as the bad. I will say though....if he is reaching out to his ex or even meeting her then you have issues. It's one thing to think about them, its totally something else if he is having dinner, going places, or calling and texting them. So as long as its just his thoughts relax and don't make a big deal out of it.
  • NessaReh85
    NessaReh85 Posts: 140 Member
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    There will always come a time when you think about your ex. When you see them in public or the paper. I have been with my husband for 11 years and married for 2 yrs. Before I got with my husband, I was with my ex for 4 years. It was very hard for me to get over my ex. There are still times to this day that I will see him or his mom and wonder where would we be had I taken him back. People will always think of their ex's especially if they were there for a long time.

    You need to accept that he is at least being honest with you and telling you. Its not like he is saying that he dreams about getting back together. He is just saying that this person that took occupied a good portion of his life has crossed his mind. Don't make too much out of it, or you could be pushing Mr. Right away on a minor technicality that happens to all people.
  • 12_oz_Curls
    12_oz_Curls Posts: 140 Member
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    LEAVE HIM NOW! Pack you bags, get out, and let the poor guy find a secure understanding woman. Don't ruin his life any more with your personal insecurities and clingy ways. Poor Guy.
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
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    Occasionally I look my highschool ex up on facebook. Pretty sure that's why facebook was invented.
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
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    LEAVE HIM NOW! Pack you bags, get out, and let the poor guy find a secure understanding woman. Don't ruin his life any more with your personal insecurities and clingy ways. Poor Guy.

    :laugh: :drinker:
  • VelveteenArabian
    VelveteenArabian Posts: 758 Member
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    You're incredibly demanding for a TWO MONTH relationship. How on earth can you be in move with someone after two months? You don't even know him yet. Sounds like you're living together already if you have bags to pack. Rushing much?

    Unless he's reaching out to contact her or is responding to contact from her, mark it as something to be noted and get over yourself because it's been two months.
  • AliceDark
    AliceDark Posts: 3,886 Member
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    Don't overreact and punish him for being open and honest with you.
  • Valrotha
    Valrotha Posts: 294 Member
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    Sorry if this is blunt, but I think this needs to be said. If you want him to be honest with you, you need to stop overreacting to him being honest. If they were together 7 years, then he's going to think about her from time to time. I was with my last gf 6 months (we broke up a year and a half ago), and I still think about her. There's a huge difference between thinking about someone and loving them.

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