Girls- Getting sexually frusterated?

nolachick

I just have to say, for those that are rolling in the sweat, bravo to you! Kisses!!! I am a champ at those times but respectfully- I'd like to say, stop it? When we are talking about being overweight for example you don't see a whole crowd of size 2's rolling in saying OMFG JUST EAT ONE CRACKER A DAY...LIKE DUH!!
Get it?

Sorry but i have to agree. like when my ex and i broke up becuz of his commitment issues, then my room mate gets engaged after 6 MONTHS of dating this guy she feels the need to remind everyone that that's why she dates older men cuz they are ready to commit. SERIOUSLY?

rileamoyer

It's been almost 3 yrs since intercourse for me, and the only reason he agreed that night was because I agreed to have another baby. Unfortunately for me I got pregnant on the first try.

Before that it'd been 2 yrs.

I've just come to the conclusion my husband will never find me attractive again because I "cut him off" of the swinging scene once I got pregnant with our daughter 10 yrs ago. He's always been addicted to online p0rn but it wasn't until my first pregnancy that he just completely shut me out.

So I feel for you gals -- massive libido here -- but after the first few years you get numb to it. And that's why I threw out my romance novels, too...out of sight, out of mind, right?

Honey, don't want to be harsh on you, but your man is gay or has smb else. 3 years no sex? i'd had a lover by now, or divorced.

Not gay. He's addicted to online p0rn so he gets his "kicks" that way. He did get into an "emotional" affair with a woman from the UK (nothing physical) which lasted a few years and I think he resents that I made him give it up.

And frankly, if it weren't for my health issues and that he's a good dad (tho lousy husband) I would be divorced. As for the lover part, let's see what happens after I lose this weight! :devil:

I really didnt want to be harsh but something is wrong with this picture, whether he's addicted to porn or having an affair, you should not have to "make him give up anything" and he should not resent you. Lots of women just stay in the marriage for their kids but you have to think about how your marriage affects your kids too. He may be a good father but if he's a bad husband then he's a bad example to your kids. I mean I dont know how he treats you outside the bedroom but if its not with love and respect then how do your kids perceive that? Do you want your son to grow up n be like his dad or your daughter to think its ok for men to neglect their spouses? sorry if i'm out of line, but u may think they dont notice or arent affected but they are.

My parents are still together, but sometimes after somethings my dad does I almost want to encourage my mom to leave him because she deserves better :S He's a good man but damn I would not tolerate somethings he does. UGH MEN!

No you're not out of line. Advice is always appreciated.

As for the out of the bedroom relationship, we have been very careful to never argue in front of the kids, and when my daughter was 2 or so and I caught him chatting and looking at stuff where she could see, I put the fear of God into him about that. So he has agreed (and has stuck to) not going online until the kids are in bed. He is very good with the kids, helps me out especially when I'm incapacitated by my chemo or if I'm having a massive flare or something else is going on. Having seen my parents constantly fighting I've tried to be very careful to not show any of that in front of my kids. We joke around, we talk about our days, we all watch TV together or play Wii or something (when I'm feeling up to it). Really, it's just the bedroom part of things.

And unlike my parents there wouldn't be a question about us going to bed together or something because with my work schedule I'm usually in bed by 8 pm, and the kids put ME to bed, and I get up around 2 am or so to work on the days I work.

As for the "resentment" it stems from him believing that there was nothing wrong because there was no sex involved. He didn't see what he did as wrong, but he fell in love with her, talked to her over the phone, exchanged gifts, so there was an affair. He didn't see it that way since his dad had tons of physical affairs, so he didn't feel it was an actual affair. Some day he'll come to the realization that it was wrong.

I think if I was in better health, closer to my family, etc, it'd be easier to leave. I don't want him to have sole custody, and with my health I don't trust myself to be able to care for them by myself. So for now, I'm just concentrating my energy into losing weight, trying to bring my health under some kind of control, and just think of the kids when I get really lonely. :flowerforyou:

God bless you and help you through all of this.

Xandi

Don't feel bad, walkingGirl. My husband has been too tired plenty of times. I've ALWAYS been the one in the relationship pushing for it more than other times. I don't think that EVERY guy has to be a hornball. Just because he said "no," and he's too tired, doesn't mean he's cheating or that he's abnormal, by any means. Sorry to hear that. My husband is a Marine...I get sexually deprived A LOT. Hahaha...

Good luck, kiddo.

I feel for you!!!
mine is Navy... I am tired of being deprived!!!

Karleyyy

I haven't had any interest in a year or so. I haven't even really been attracted to anyone. Until a few days ago that is, now it is like an switch has been flipped...haha.

Lorelei19

I am! Who isn't getting much of a sex life because your sig other is too busy with school/work/kids? In my case, it's school. I'm the one with a bursting red line to the temp scale lol his seems like is zero. Says he wants too..but he feels tired. :explode:

I wish that were the case. My BF says that he "just doesn't enjoy sex as much anymore". He says it's from when he was younger being a player of sorts. Whatever the reason, it is quite 'frustrating'. And is also quite the blow to my self esteem. The first month or two before we started officially dating were hot and heavy (he just came home from his second 2 year tour in Iraq), and maybe it was like that a month or two after, but since then it's been maybe once a month if I'm lucky. We've been together over a year now and are looking to get a house together (his idea).

I'm kinda of hoping that if I lose weight and can be more attractive to myself I'll definitely be more attractive to him.... but I dunno.

bespatter

Yeah, my boyfriend of two years has always kind of turned me down... I'm starting to wonder if I might be a beard... You wouldn't think it would take me this long to catch on! Lol.

nolachick

ok not trying to diss anyone or be disrespectful in anyway so please don't get mad at me for saying this but I can see things fizzling after some time of being together but I don't understand how some girls have been experiencing this since the beginning of their relationships :ohwell: I wud definately be frustrated

SarahElittlebit

Wow. I'm glad I stumbled on this posting. I thought I was the only one with raging hormones. Unfortunately I'm not dating anyone right now though. I agree..thank god for shower heads and toys.

kerriBB37

Does anyone else pick meaningless fights just to have make up sex? I find it is way more exciting :bigsmile:

daniel1love

hey Carl! whats up man? hahaha






Crap, I dont think we're supposed to be in here either :drinker:

Oh come on guys dont be scared we could use a mans openion

daniel1love

Yeah, my boyfriend of two years has always kind of turned me down... I'm starting to wonder if I might be a beard... You wouldn't think it would take me this long to catch on! Lol.

I know the feeling there is nothing worse then being turned down after you get "dressed" for the occasion

bouldert

try a F.W.B.

hjsyndrome

Please don`t jump on me (no pun intended) but am curious about something and just want to put this out for discussion.

How many of the ladies here are not satisfied with the outcome of having sex...by that I mean has the guy never learned that sex is not about just him getting finished rather then desiring to please the lady first and foremost.
If that is the case I suspect that there are signals of frustration sent and the guy gets frustrated in turn and eventually shuts down.

Just a possibility and only asking it in the sense of making a suggestion that the lady makes it clear what she wants and enjoys so the whole thing can be better for both.
I really don`t think a lot of guys ever learn how to give as good as to receive maybe.

What?? She always told me it was the best 30 seconds of her life!!!

LADIES FIRST!!!

I always make sure she goes first one way or another. Its a must in my book!

hjsyndrome

My story is different. I used to be like you guys until i turned 25 and my bf, who would turn me down a lot. I initiated sex 90% of the time and in 5 years i said no maybe only 2 times, him-i stopped counting. Well last year, his life became stable, mine started to be a wreck.
Eventualy all the stress got to me and my libido is about 30% at what it used to be. Now, my partner is running after me, asking for it, he is horny all the time.:))
It's funny, but what we experience in life affects our sex drive.

I cant say no. My switch is on all the time, that way Im ready when she is. When it comes to sex - No is not in my vocabulary (I mean for me - she says no a lot).

spcopps

DH and I have 3 kids ages 7, 3 and 3..this sounds mean but for us to have "our" time we have movie night for the kids on Friday night before we get too tired LOL. We rent a movie off Netflix or Vudu and let the kids eat popcorn and watch a movie...we sneak into the bedroom and lock the door for a "little" while. Before we did this it could honestly be 2-4 months between our sessions LOL.

As for disappointment girls get a BULLET!! You will be done SEVERAL times before he gets warmed up good!!

Stefani74

As for disappointment girls get a BULLET!! You will be done SEVERAL times before he gets warmed up good!!

EVERY woman should have one!

wriglucy

Wow...I didn't read any of the comments, but your sig. other sounds like me! I'm a full time graduate student, starting my doctoral this summer, and a teaching assistant so I teach 2 classes a semester too, along with taking 3-4 classes myself. Really....I love my husband...but I get SOOO tired and run down!

So...I guess if you want some...see what you can do to lessen his stress? Like...if my husband would offer to help me grade exams, or help me study....I would have more time and less stress....so I may be up for it.

Sorry..just a thought.

SpartanHard

Intersting read ladies.

0mega60

beautiful ladies...i was going to ask to join this thread but im sure i would get myself into hot water ....heee...

....................πολύτιμος κτητικός ότι ποτέ έρχεται σε έναs άντραs σε αυτό κόσμοs is έναs γυναίκα καρδιά ..........................................The most precious possession that ever comes to a man in this world is a woman's heart." -

S>E>X> is just a bonus for the MAN with RESPECT

just4peachy

Don't feel bad, walkingGirl. My husband has been too tired plenty of times. I've ALWAYS been the one in the relationship pushing for it more than other times. I don't think that EVERY guy has to be a hornball. Just because he said "no," and he's too tired, doesn't mean he's cheating or that he's abnormal, by any means. Sorry to hear that. My husband is a Marine...I get sexually deprived A LOT. Hahaha...

Good luck, kiddo.

I feel for you!!!
mine is Navy... I am tired of being deprived!!!

Mine's Army... Sexually deprived for your freedom.

wriglucy

Don't feel bad, walkingGirl. My husband has been too tired plenty of times. I've ALWAYS been the one in the relationship pushing for it more than other times. I don't think that EVERY guy has to be a hornball. Just because he said "no," and he's too tired, doesn't mean he's cheating or that he's abnormal, by any means. Sorry to hear that. My husband is a Marine...I get sexually deprived A LOT. Hahaha...

Good luck, kiddo.

I feel for you!!!
mine is Navy... I am tired of being deprived!!!

Mine's Army... Sexually deprived for your freedom.

Thank you ladies for being sexually deprived so we can all sleep safe here in the US! I have nothing but respect for what your husbands do!

kjensen15

My DH and I use to have a GREAT sex life before we got married. Not that we are older our days consist of going to work, going to the gym, showering, making dinner, cleaning up from dinner, and then by that time its 9:30 or so. Now I'd be ok getting in bed at that time and having a little play time, but he ALWAYS feels the need to stay up, watch TV, and have a few drinks. Sex is just not nearly as appealing to me when I'm 100% sober and he smells of boozes. I'm not saying he has a drinking problem I jsut think some times he'd rather have a drink, rather than get in bed with me.

minmatt

As for disappointment girls get a BULLET!! You will be done SEVERAL times before he gets warmed up good!!

EVERY woman should have one!

Exactly! If he "says" he's not interesting, pick up the bullet IN front of him....99.9% chance he will jump in, and if he doest... you still "win" lol

spcopps

As for disappointment girls get a BULLET!! You will be done SEVERAL times before he gets warmed up good!!

EVERY woman should have one!

Exactly! If he "says" he's not interesting, pick up the bullet IN front of him....99.9% chance he will jump in, and if he doest... you still "win" lol

OMG I love it...I never have to tempt DH with it..he pulls it out of the drawer before getting in bed and I KNOW what he has in mind LOL.

wriglucy

Sorry to distract from the convo...but I've seen this a lot and still don't know what it means. What's a DH? A dumb husband? I know it has to do with husband...but the "D" part....still don't get.
Thanks!

Pineapples

I am a very sexual person and I am not ashamed of it. I love it, need it and want it. And my husband knows it. If he is too tired and I am climbing the walls I take matters into my own hands and put him in the mood, do my thang and he always shall we say "rise's to the occasion". I know not everyone is comfortable with their sexuality or being the aggressor. But it works for me! So no not sexually frustrated. I wake him up if I have to! :devil:

I agree.

pressica

Sorry to distract from the convo...but I've seen this a lot and still don't know what it means. What's a DH? A dumb husband? I know it has to do with husband...but the "D" part....still don't get.
Thanks!

Ha ha!! Dumb husband...that's pretty funny. It usually means "dear" husband. But I like dumb better.

nolachick

Ha ha!! Dumb husband...that's pretty funny. It usually means "dear" husband. But I like dumb better.

hahaha AGREE!

Wandami

Um....I ordered some Basic Instinct..lol..I'm dying here!!!!!

ebgbjo

My ex was ALWAYS too tired...not interested...could care less. It's not that he was getting it elsewhere, it just was't a priority for him. And honestly it didn't matter what I did, he just wasn't interested in sex. My husband now....he is 44, works 60-80hrs a week and has NEVER been too tired or not interested. We have been together 7 years and still it's almost every night.

He's a lucky guy to have a wife that is on the same page with him in enjoying it that frequently. I'm married and I'm not even sure who the President was last time I got any.... :brokenheart:

Like someone else said earlier, it's like glue to a relationship. Without it...stuff just falls apart all around you.

Isnt that the truth. And having a spouse who takes your hard work for granted and doesn't give you the emotional support you need at times is a MAJOR turn off for me. Lets just say, it has been a LONG time for me but damnit, once I get my body back to where I want it, he either gets into the game or he is permanently off the team