Strip clubs for married men?
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Ummm yeah I should stay out of this. My ex husband went with friends once or twice, I even went with. I have friends who are dancers. I'm not saying there are not good men who just want to see half naked women, I'm saying the number of "bad" honest hard working men out weigh the decent by FAR. I don't enjoy the idea of my current husband looking at any women that naked but me. . . If we have fun together at home (face it a lot can be done), I am much more comfortable with that. BUT without the previous BAD experience I'd probably had said it was fine . . . .
well, you never listed a bad experience, you just said you went, and you are now saying that you are punishing your next husband for the sins of the last..........that doesn't make much sense
I don't think saying "sweatheart, don't go to strip clubs" is punishment... I mean really? You're missing out on expensive drinks and lust...
you are missing the point, would you want to be held to a different standard than the last man a woman was married to based on his actions?0 -
If man friend wants to go, he can go. No sense in "forbidding" someone to do something. It only makes it more appealing. On the other hand though, I would have a real issue with the stripper being in a closed area like a hotel room/lap dance room. It's too easy for things to get out of control.
But I have no problem with him attending a strip club and I wouldn't have any problem going. Besides, girls get more attention at strip clubs anyways:)0 -
Why talk about "banning"? Like I said earlier, the subject of strip clubs has never really come up between us. He wouldn't want to go, I wouldn't want him to go. We sing from the same page on this one. We are adults, we aren't in the business of banning each other from things. Our marriage is about mutual respect.0
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I think its acceptable...why would it not be, if you dont trust your partner then why are you with him/her
Heck, go together and have more fun0 -
I've gone with a bunch of guys, I've gone with my wife - neither one on a regular basis (I'm talking once every couple of years). Both are fun, but obviously different.
Like my wife says - " I don't care where he gets his appetite, as long as he comes home for dinner!".0 -
It really isn't about being worried about them cheating. I just can't imagine why anyone would want their partner choosing to spend an evening looking at random naked women over being at home with the one woman he is supposed to love. I don't want my husband wanting to be anywhere other than with me in the evenings. We get little enough time together as it is. That's why we are together, we are best friends, first and foremost. We WANT to spend all available time together. If we didn't, we wouldn't be married.
The subject has never come up between us, because it would never enter his head to want to go to one. He isn't like that. Thank goodness.
All guys like to look at naked women, its science. There is a billion dollar porn industry to prove it. And i believe its when people stop acting like they are the two most beautiful and handsome people on the planet, and embrace that there are better looking people out there that you truly respect one another more. Also you mentioned exploited..........I girl i used to work with stripped, and she made almost $200k/year. She took a 150,000 pay cut to get a "real job." If anyone is being exploited its the customers.
I work with all males and have for a long long time, and there is not one of them that wouldn't like to go to a strip joint, but there are many that would definitely not tell their wives about it..............food for thought.
I don't like going on a regular basis. I love women and sex but random chicks giving lap dances to total strangers isn't a turn on. Also I wouldn't want my girl grinding on some male stripper.
I have only been once in about 5 years myself, and it was a bachelor party. But that doesn't change the fact that guys like looking at naked women. And every guy i know who's wife has forbidden him to do something like that...............has cheated on her. So I think women need to pick their battles. And remember you are dealing with a bunch of animals (us) that are genetically predisposed to find many woman attractive in order to further the human race. Its science. Google how many species in the world are monogamous..............If i guy wants to look at some strange boobies and come home to you, dont fight him. If it gets out of hand, leave. But we men are like children in that regard, if you forbid us to do something, we will only want it more.
Okay, honest question here. I am not trying to flame, I am seriously curious about this.
If you (and I mean men in general, not you specifically) want to go look at naked women because monogamy isn't natural, why do you get married? Why do men KNOWINGLY make a commitment to be monogamous and then try to claim that it isn't natural to be monogamous? Why not just stay single and go to the strip club every night if that's what you want to do?0 -
I don't like going on a regular basis. I love women and sex but random chicks giving lap dances to total strangers isn't a turn on. Also I wouldn't want my girl grinding on some male stripper.
Thanks. I know my husband feels the same way. He is attracted to women he knows and respects, not random bodies. It's not who he is.
Also, he doesn't go out in the evenings, he hates going out, he doesn't drink, he doesn't get on with other men, and loathes pack mentality. All his friends are female, and I don't mind that at all.
He is one of a kind then...........a man with no man friends? I think they made a movie about that recently with Paul Rudd........0 -
I think its acceptable...why would it not be, if you dont trust your partner then why are you with him/her
Heck, go together and have more fun
^^^^Exactly!!0 -
Call me a prude here but I'm gonna say no. Nothing good comes from going to those places. they offer no moral or redeeming qualities. Last time I was in one (20+ years ago before I was married) there was some dumb cowboy sitting infront of my at the edge of stage with his cowboy hat on. I was involved with an MC at the time and some of my crew was with me. I reached up and knocked his big *kitten* hat off his head. That could have gotten real ugly real quick but he made a wise decision to keep his hat off. Nothing good comes out of visiting places like that. I have what i want at home, i dont need to go and oogle other women and let other thoughts/influneces into my simple mind.0
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I think this is one of those things that varies from relationship to relationship. There are different opinions/viewpoints and what really matters is what the couple in question think, what sort of compromise or agreement they can come to, and then sticking with it. No one should run their relationship according to other peoples' rules.0
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They can go together:-) I am older now and I have been with hubby for 15 years but we have been together a couple of times and then went home to reap the benefits:-)0
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I don't mind if my husband goes, but he's usually too cheap to do so. We wanted to go to one together when we were in Vegas but we could think of better ways to drop a few hundred bucks, so we decided not to.
I trust him. And I honestly don't give a flying flip if he wants to spend his evening looking at random naked chicks. I would be a hypocrite if I told him he can't look at random naked chicks, because I enjoy porn and looking at random naked people of either gender.0 -
It really isn't about being worried about them cheating. I just can't imagine why anyone would want their partner choosing to spend an evening looking at random naked women over being at home with the one woman he is supposed to love. I don't want my husband wanting to be anywhere other than with me in the evenings. We get little enough time together as it is. That's why we are together, we are best friends, first and foremost. We WANT to spend all available time together. If we didn't, we wouldn't be married.
The subject has never come up between us, because it would never enter his head to want to go to one. He isn't like that. Thank goodness.
All guys like to look at naked women, its science. There is a billion dollar porn industry to prove it. And i believe its when people stop acting like they are the two most beautiful and handsome people on the planet, and embrace that there are better looking people out there that you truly respect one another more. Also you mentioned exploited..........I girl i used to work with stripped, and she made almost $200k/year. She took a 150,000 pay cut to get a "real job." If anyone is being exploited its the customers.
I work with all males and have for a long long time, and there is not one of them that wouldn't like to go to a strip joint, but there are many that would definitely not tell their wives about it..............food for thought.
I don't like going on a regular basis. I love women and sex but random chicks giving lap dances to total strangers isn't a turn on. Also I wouldn't want my girl grinding on some male stripper.
I have only been once in about 5 years myself, and it was a bachelor party. But that doesn't change the fact that guys like looking at naked women. And every guy i know who's wife has forbidden him to do something like that...............has cheated on her. So I think women need to pick their battles. And remember you are dealing with a bunch of animals (us) that are genetically predisposed to find many woman attractive in order to further the human race. Its science. Google how many species in the world are monogamous..............If i guy wants to look at some strange boobies and come home to you, dont fight him. If it gets out of hand, leave. But we men are like children in that regard, if you forbid us to do something, we will only want it more.
Okay, honest question here. I am not trying to flame, I am seriously curious about this.
If you (and I mean men in general, not you specifically) want to go look at naked women because monogamy isn't natural, why do you get married? Why do men KNOWINGLY make a commitment to be monogamous and then try to claim that it isn't natural to be monogamous? Why not just stay single and go to the strip club every night if that's what you want to do?
Scientifically, its not natural, I have been married 5 years. I have never even come close to cheating on my wife out of love and respect for her. But, I like to look at naked women, because I am a man. It is natural for a man to want to "spread his seed" thats how evolution happens, thats how we have advanced as far as a species as we have. I will use an analogy for you. And mind you as a man i have seen this play out in ways many women do not get to see. A man is a dog. He will be loyal to you. But, if you keep him on a leash all the time, if he ever gets off it, first thing he will do is run out in traffic. You need to give him space. I am not trying to condemn anything, or condone anything. But I know many guys, I work with 250+ and no women. And every time one of their wives forbids them to do something, they will do it one way or another, or resent them instead. I consider this a PSA. I dont know anyone that goes to strip joints all the time, or even more than once or twice a year. But i also have never met a guy that didn't enjoy himself in there either................
If a guy is going to cheat, it wont be at a strip joint as someone put up earlier. It will be with someone he works with, or is friends with, or meets out at a bar one night. Strip joints are not the enemy. My wife doesn't like me to go. But she wouldn't never tell me i can't. Much like i don't have a problem with her going to a bachelorette party. Respect was referenced as a reason to not go, I list it as a reason to do things you like to do. But we are traditional, my wife has female friends, I have male friends. They sometimes go see guy strippers, we sometimes see girl strippers. I don't see the big deal.0 -
I think this is one of those things that varies from relationship to relationship. There are different opinions/viewpoints and what really matters is what the couple in question think, what sort of compromise or agreement they can come to, and then sticking with it. No one should run their relationship according to other peoples' rules.
I agree completely. Do what works for you and for your marriage/relationship.0 -
If men are "visual" creatures, and women have trust issues with their fellas going to a strip club, then should we also forbid women from reading steamy novels, and watching movies with their "dreamy" guys in them since women are "emotional" creatures. Is it fair to not let one gender partially satisfy their primal calling while the other one is allowed to soak it up everyday? Your thoughts.0
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If men are "visual" creatures, and women have trust issues with their fells going to a strip club, then should we also forbid women from reading steamy novels, and watching movies with their "dreamy" guys in them since women are "emotional" creatures. Is it fair to not let one gender partially satisfy their primal calling while the other one is allowed to soak it up everyday? Your thoughts.
Totally agree with you!!!!0 -
I would rather the club than a hotel room. At least in the club the restriction are enforced. I let my hubby go to clubs, that was until he saw a girl he went to school with working there. He said that ruined it for him, it was weird to see someone he knew working at one. That was over 10 years ago and he's not been back to one since.
We were very honest about him going to them and even set some of our own rules. It helped me deal with the fact that he was going to one. I could have gone to one too, but I really don't care for those kinds of clubs.
I do think both people have to be ok with it, otherwise it could cause issues. If she really doesn't want him to go then that should be respected.0 -
If men are "visual" creatures, and women have trust issues with their fellas going to a strip club, then should we also forbid women from reading steamy novels, and watching movies with their "dreamy" guys in them since women are "emotional" creatures. Is it fair to not let one gender partially satisfy their primal calling while the other one is allowed to soak it up everyday? Your thoughts.
Excellent question. Can't wait to see some of the responses from those that forbid strip clubs.0 -
They can go together:-) I am older now and I have been with hubby for 15 years but we have been together a couple of times and then went home to reap the benefits:-)
This gal's got it right !!!!! ;-)0 -
hmmmm. definately on the fence with this one.
I've never been to one. But I wouldn't want my girl going to a club with naked guys.
Can't imagine she'd want me going to one. Unless we went together.0
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