How long have you been single for?

sunkisses

I've been single about 7-8 months. Why? Because I've grown to accept that most people can't handle me. I have all my *kitten* together and I want my partner to have his together as well. You'd think this would be easier to come by, but it's not.

That, and apparently the guys who think they can handle me live all the way in California. *evil eye*

I totally get that.... I've spent time figuring out me, I'm strong and confident in who I am and apparantly that is now more of an issue when I was scared and insecure!! LOL!! I know that I expect people to live up to the same standards that I hold myself up to, but its no easy find, and I'm not prepared to settle.

That is it. Exactly. I don't like feeling like I have to teach my partner so much. Naturally we're going to learn from each other, of course, but I don't like to be in the position of constant frustration because he's still figuring himself out. He will end up inevitably frustrated because he doesn't know what he doesn't know about himself.

caligirl2802

I've been single about 7-8 months. Why? Because I've grown to accept that most people can't handle me. I have all my *kitten* together and I want my partner to have his together as well. You'd think this would be easier to come by, but it's not.

That, and apparently the guys who think they can handle me live all the way in California. *evil eye*

I totally get that.... I've spent time figuring out me, I'm strong and confident in who I am and apparantly that is now more of an issue when I was scared and insecure!! LOL!! I know that I expect people to live up to the same standards that I hold myself up to, but its no easy find, and I'm not prepared to settle.

That is it. Exactly. I don't like feeling like I have to teach my partner so much. Naturally we're going to learn from each other, of course, but I don't like to be in the position of constant frustration because he's still figuring himself out. He will end up inevitably frustrated because he doesn't know what he doesn't know about himself.

Exactly!!!! It seems that a woman that knows her own mind, and knows what she wants seems to be intimidating for a lot of guys.... weird, because in a man I am LOOKING for someone that knows what he wants and knows his own mind. LOL

kit_katty

I don't *like* being single because I love having a relationship and someone to nuggle with and talk about our days and watch tv, but at the same time, I'd rather be single than in a bad relationship.

This! Exactly. I've been single for 16 months, I'd say mutual decision to most people, but really it was me pulling the plug. I'm not rushing to find a new guy because A) I don't need one, I'm working on getting myself together/ being happy with me and C) my life's a bit complicated right now anyway, don't have the time or energy for all the potential emotional... stuff, stress, that goes with starting to date someone.

MadPanda75

Too long! Haha

glypta

Just over 4 years :frown:

taniam16

I have been single for about 6 months now and it is honestly the most daunting thing in the world. I was with my ex boyfriend for over 5 years (from 17 to 22) and feel like i gained very little from the relationship. For a good 2 years I was unhappy and gaining a lot of weight but couldn't figure out why. Turns out I just didn't want to spend the rest of my life with him so we drifted apart and then broke up. At the start of the relationship i weighed 55kg, managed to drop to 50kg, at the end of the relationship I weighed 68kg and today I weigh 57kg. Still got a bit to go to get to that goal weight again but I'll get there and it's an amazing feeling to feel good about your weight and your look again.

I wouldn't be looked at once let alone twice when I was overweight and now I'm getting a touch more attention which feels great. I'm hoping I can meet some nice cute boys once I've achieved my goal weight! lol!

SuzMac1981

4 years.

i_love_vinegar

I have been single for about 6 months now and it is honestly the most daunting thing in the world. I was with my ex boyfriend for over 5 years (from 17 to 22) and feel like i gained very little from the relationship. For a good 2 years I was unhappy and gaining a lot of weight but couldn't figure out why. Turns out I just didn't want to spend the rest of my life with him so we drifted apart and then broke up. At the start of the relationship i weighed 55kg, managed to drop to 50kg, at the end of the relationship I weighed 68kg and today I weigh 57kg. Still got a bit to go to get to that goal weight again but I'll get there and it's an amazing feeling to feel good about your weight and your look again.

I wouldn't be looked at once let alone twice when I was overweight and now I'm getting a touch more attention which feels great. I'm hoping I can meet some nice cute boys once I've achieved my goal weight! lol!

This is EXACTLY what I went through, except the relationship was from when I had just turned 18 till I was just 21. ^^

I have lost weight, but still have more to lose and know exactly how u feel so funny i can relate to u~

2stepz

I'm I the only one who gets really f*n po'd at people rubbing their relationships in your face? Great, you're in mutual lust and are happy... good for you. I don't need to see it day in and day out, I don't need to see it at all! I don't need to be reminded that I'm flying solo with no parachute. Grrrr....

caligirl2802

I'm I the only one who gets really f*n po'd at people rubbing their relationships in your face? Great, you're in mutual lust and are happy... good for you. I don't need to see it day in and day out, I don't need to see it at all! I don't need to be reminded that I'm flying solo with no parachute. Grrrr....

Actually it makes me happy, kinda reminds me what it was like to have those feelings and happy that other people are experiencing that. Sure there is a cynical side to me that has thoughts in the back of my mind like "enjoy it while it lasts" but for the most part, I'm happy that others experience that and hold out hope that maybe one day I will be lucky enough to have that feeling again!

TooFatToFit

I'm I the only one who gets really f*n po'd at people rubbing their relationships in your face? Great, you're in mutual lust and are happy... good for you. I don't need to see it day in and day out, I don't need to see it at all! I don't need to be reminded that I'm flying solo with no parachute. Grrrr....

Actually it makes me happy, kinda reminds me what it was like to have those feelings and happy that other people are experiencing that. Sure there is a cynical side to me that has thoughts in the back of my mind like "enjoy it while it lasts" but for the most part, I'm happy that others experience that and hold out hope that maybe one day I will be lucky enough to have that feeling again!

That is EXACTLY how I feel about it. To the word.

Meg_85

Going on 6 years...guess i'm picky..:-/

Tyler4846

For about 8 months now, and haven't found anyone worth spending any time with.

teagirlmedium

I've been single for almost a year and it is because I typically fly under the radar naturally so people don't really notice me, and when they do they don't look at me and think I want to date her. The guys who do want to date me are typically a good amount older than me (like 10 years and above on average) and or military, and since there is no military base in this town there is not much hope for me.

FluffyCorky

4 years and counting. Unless you count the guy I went on 2 dates with 2 months ago. I'm happy being single but would prefer to be in a relationship (i just like the companionship). The guys that hit on me do so in a way that I would never consider dating them. And I've always been the girl that guys love being friends with but would never date.

gmann1973

too long to remember, just cant find my it girl......you know the one that can melt you with her smile, the the girl thats so beautiful and she dnt even know it. the girl you can grow old with

michedarnd

More than 12 years... I expect to stay that way. I haven't been looking, and I don't really intend to. The reasons are complicated, and I don't hate men, at ALL, but I'm simply not going there, any more.

DannyMussels

6 or 7 months or so.

Met my ex when she came back to town for a family thing, she stayed a year and a bit..we both got awesome jobs at a private camp last year, then she moved back home shortly after. Fairly certain she cheated on me twice, but it may have happened more then that. She was young, and pretty cute. It was fun while it lasted.

But within the past year or so, I've gotten more into fitness and exercise, which is both good and bad. I see, talked to, and have met some incredible people both online and in real life who have tons more in common with me. So now my views on women have changed quite a bit. I find ones that take care of themselves, and actually work hard to look good, a lot more appealing then the average person. It goes to say a lot about someone and their lifestyle if they put forth the kinda effort that most of us on here do.

So I now have this thing for fit chicks.

TheMaidOfAstolat

I got divorced in February...so...7 months. I dated a few guys since the divorce but none became my bf. Being single isn't all that fun to me....I was part of a couple for nearly 11 years. I'm 26 and a single mom and having to fully start over. My self confidence is gone due to my ex husbands comments and I'm just learning to accept the stretchmarks and skin left over from pregnancy. It seems that the men I've been with are superficial because not a one could look at my stomach...at least they never commented on it like my ex husband did. Oh well...there is a man out there for me...maybe I'll find him one day.

Jade_Butterfly

long enough to know I'm just fine with that~

ElementalMoe

Two glorious years since I separated.

I've been single this long for a few reasons:
a) I like being single - I'm not about to settle for a sub-standard partner just because I can get lonely from time to time
b) It seems only married dudes or people who don't have their lives together are attracted to me
c) I'm not a warm & fuzzy approachable kind of person. . .

Meh - Someone out there will think my no-nonsense and biting wit is charming. . . Maybe.

wanderinglight

I'm I the only one who gets really f*n po'd at people rubbing their relationships in your face? Great, you're in mutual lust and are happy... good for you. I don't need to see it day in and day out, I don't need to see it at all! I don't need to be reminded that I'm flying solo with no parachute. Grrrr....

I felt like that for a LONG time, and then one day I had the little epiphany that there is not a limited supply of love or happiness in the world. In other words, one person's happiness or love doesn't leave any less for you. Kinda obvious I guess but it made it easier for me to be around my friends who all seemed to be in amazing relationships while I was single for years. And that was when I really started to enjoy being single! And I heard great advice from someone who said "if someone told you that one year from RIGHT NOW you would meet the love of your life, you would sure as hell enjoy this last year being single!" And I did

P.S. I was single for about 3 years before I met my current boyfriend, at age 39. Realizing now at age 40 that he is the reason nothing ever seemed to work out the right way before. So never give up!

fromaquasar

I've been single for 2 months First time in 6 years and I plan to stay this way

virginiagirl93

I have been single for 18 yrs

Which is my whole life lol... Never had a date or a boyfriend.

Technically 2 yrs of being single when I was allowed to date. Couldn't date til I was 16 and then no one has ever asked me or shown interest, I guess. oh well

jaydork24

before i begin...*clear throat* hi, my name is Jess, i am noob and this is my first post. feel lucky babies!


and sadly (?), for almost 25yrs, i've never been in a relationship. and mainly because for at least 20yrs...my weight always fluctuated. and because i am very quiet in nature...i felt like i couldn't fight back against those loud negatives with my own. so any crushes that i had, i never admitted (well, there was one guy, but he blew me off like 3mos after i confessed...and this was 2yrs after i graduated high school when i confessed), or do i feel confident enough to be seen with guys without making them feel like they're bait for jokes at my expense (actually have had that said to me from an ex...over facebook, that he only hung out with me because he felt sorry for me...and was embarrassed by doing so).

what makes it that much harder is that there is this guy at my gym, who i am sure is absolutely adorable and is a sweetheart...i've had almost a full year of staring at him from afar...and i'm still afraid to even say "hi". what's a girl to do?!?!?



s/n to OP: are you a fan of taeyang (your .gif) too? *hi fives if so*

dannylives

Iv'e been single since 2007 because I drank WAY too much! I didn't drink everyday but when I drank it was AWFUL! The first 2 or 3 hours I was funny as hell but then it turned into an alcoholic drama! (no fights, no abuse, nothing bad.) Iv'e been arrested for public intoxication 35 times! Its only until 2011 that iv'e found some sobriety and have only drank twice! 2 times in one year? That's a friggin' MIRACLE! , GO ME! They said in AA not to get into a relationship for a year and so that is what I'm doing. MFP RELATIONSHIPS ONLY!

TheMaidOfAstolat

Iv'e been single since 2007 because I drank WAY too much! I didn't drink everyday but when I drank it was AWFUL! The first 2 or 3 hours I was funny as hell but then it turned into an alcoholic drama! (no fights, no abuse, nothing bad.) Iv'e been arrested for public intoxication 35 times! Its only until 2011 that iv'e found some sobriety and have only drank twice! 2 times in one year? That's a friggin' MIRACLE! , GO ME! They said in AA not to get into a relationship for a year and so that is what I'm doing. MFP RELATIONSHIPS ONLY!

That's wonderful! Alcohol is one of the reasons my relationship with my ex failed. I knew I couldn't make him go to rehab or seek treatment of any kind. I think the divorce finally made him realise that he needs to choose...his daughter or alcohol and drugs. I still am not sure which way it will go. Time will tell. Congrats on making it this far! You're doing a wonderful job!

narny1979

Was with my ex for *exactly* 13.5 years the day we broke up in March this year. We were married for ten of those years.

I'm really unsure of this whole being single thing.

dragonbug300

so after reading the comments on this thread it sure would be nice to hear some folks with positive things to say about relationships...

:laugh:

Singles thread about people's own lack-of-relationships? It's bound to be depressing.

But I have a good thing to say:
I am 3 weeks single, from a relationship that was 'official' for only 2 weeks. We dated last year as well, for a month. We remained friends even after the breakup. He was my first boyfriend, and my most recent.
Am I heartbroken? Yes. I have the chocolate wrappers to attest to that.
However, I was lucky with this one. He taught me so much about life and myself. When I was around him, I became the confident, honest, loving person I'd always wanted to be. Being around him, I came to realize I COULD be that person. He was a catalyst for personal change, he helped me break out of my shell and experience things in life I never thought I could enjoy.
So I am 3 weeks single from a relationship I may mourn for a long time.
But I have come away with a new outlook on life and a determination to be the best I can be for everyone I know.
And hey, I'm still friends with him. And I value our friendship just as much as I did our romance.
:ohwell:

Life moves on. I'll just be listening to 'My Love' by Sia every day for a while in the meantime...

Deckershann

Iv'e been single since 2007 because I drank WAY too much! I didn't drink everyday but when I drank it was AWFUL! The first 2 or 3 hours I was funny as hell but then it turned into an alcoholic drama! (no fights, no abuse, nothing bad.) Iv'e been arrested for public intoxication 35 times! Its only until 2011 that iv'e found some sobriety and have only drank twice! 2 times in one year? That's a friggin' MIRACLE! , GO ME! They said in AA not to get into a relationship for a year and so that is what I'm doing. MFP RELATIONSHIPS ONLY!

Yeahhh boo I love you so much you're my everything <33333