Men Are Husbands, Not "Hubbys"

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Replies

  • JennC831
    JennC831 Posts: 628 Member
    I think hubby is used as a term of endearment... When I refer to my husband when talking to friends or when I post about him I say "hubby".. When I'm speaking to him or calling out for him I say "babe"... When I'm talking about him to people I don't really know I call him by his first name... When he's talking to me he calls me "babe"... When he refers to me to his friends he calls me wifey...

    We are that touchy feely, kiss in public, hold hands, hug, laugh out loud couple and don't care one bit how it makes others feel... This works for us and I LOVE IT!!!!
  • kb455
    kb455 Posts: 679 Member
    I think I use husband way more often than hubby. However, I don't think I've ever heard someone call their husband, "hubby" in a patronizing way. I've only heard it used as an affectionate term. I don't think its any different than using pet names like "honey" or "babe", which a lot of men do when talking to their wives. I've never really looked at it as being condescending at all.
  • kb455
    kb455 Posts: 679 Member
    double post...
  • Kandace_Riopel
    Kandace_Riopel Posts: 80 Member
    i get what you are saying my husband is my husband... though i more often call him my love! .... but on another not my sister and i are sistys!
  • VeganGal84
    VeganGal84 Posts: 938 Member
    It's almost as bad as "preggo".

    But since I've never been married or pregnant.... I'll shut up now.
  • myofibril
    myofibril Posts: 4,500 Member
    it was a "fraternity" not a "frat" because you would never shorten the word "country."

    Hamlet: Lady, shall I lie in your lap?
    Ophelia: No, my lord.
    Hamlet: I mean, my head upon your lap?
    Ophelia: Ay, my lord.
    Hamlet: Do you think I meant country matters?

    Speaking of Shakespeare:

    "What's in a name? That which we call a rose
    By any other name would smell as sweet."

    That is all I have to say on the matter.
  • FearAnLoathing
    FearAnLoathing Posts: 4,852 Member
    I :heart: my HUBBY!
  • beccyleigh
    beccyleigh Posts: 846 Member
    get over it, you aren't part of my relationship & I will refer to my hubby any way I want.
  • bwesser
    bwesser Posts: 61
    Personally, I just think we should be calling people by their REAL name instead of labels, like "hubby" and "wifey."

    ^^THIS

    If I say something to someone who I am not very close with (a co-worker) who doesn't know I have a significant other, I wouldn't start talking about Taylor because they would have no idea who that is. I would say "boyfriend." My boyfriend is having a party this weekend.

    Now that doesn't mean I would ever use "Hubby." It's not even a word! I was just responding to the labels part because I don't care, a lot of times "labels" are terms of endearment. I honestly don't think my boyfriend cares if I call him "my man" either... but maybe that's because we are comfortable with who we are.

    *edit was a spelling correction!
  • 123welk
    123welk Posts: 13
    Ha!! Cute post!! I gotta say, I've been married for 33 years to a man I adore. I call him honey, baby, sweetie, hubby, and sometimes when I'm angry, *kitten*!!!! Hahaa!! But I love him, and what we call each other is in the spirit of love and friendship, so no biggie to me! :heart:
  • k2quiere
    k2quiere Posts: 4,151 Member
    Oh c'mon, hubby and wifey, really? In spanish, wives are esposas, which in any other context means handcuffs, so go figure.
  • thor1god1of1awesome
    thor1god1of1awesome Posts: 481 Member
    my wifey calls me hubby and I dont mind as she dont mind I call her that. I see no harm in lil pet names. But hey to everyone to each there own
  • Teliooo
    Teliooo Posts: 725 Member
    get over it, you aren't part of my relationship & I will refer to my hubby any way I want.
    [/quote

    this
  • Sidesteal
    Sidesteal Posts: 5,510 Member
    <---- Hubby.
  • beccyleigh
    beccyleigh Posts: 846 Member
    I've been marriee 27 years and have never once called, or been even remotely tempted to call, my husband "hubby" and he hast certainly never called me "the missus." I can't even imagine how I would respond if he did so.

    I have several siblings, most married, and can't recall ever hearing one of them call their spouse "hubby" or "the missus" or the like. I have never heard of my female friends call their spouse "hubby." I have heard a couple of the non-professional staff at work refer to their husband as "hubby" and a married male support staff always refers to his wife as "the missues." The relevant variables might be that they all live in smaller towns and are in a different socio-economic class than those who don't use those terms.

    That said, I suspect the use or non-use of those terms reflects many factors, such as where and when you grew up and overall cultural norms. In my community, it would generally be out of the norm t for a woman of my age to call my husband "hubby".

    In a broader sense, I dislike and don't use pet names or slang terms in general, and can't think of even one friend or family member who uses them either. As a result, I cringe when I read "sammiches" or "hubby", "better half,," etc.,. I'm trying to train myself not to react so immediately because this is a casual forum and people often write how they talk but I have a hard time getting past the fact that even casually my friends and family don't talk or write that way, so it's just so unfamilar to me that I have a hard time getting past the immediate reaction.

    yes the peasants always have their own slang!!!
  • vanessaclarkgbr
    vanessaclarkgbr Posts: 731 Member
    When I was in a college fraternity, the old joke was it was a "fraternity" not a "frat" because you would never shorten the word "country." (Maybe I have the joke wrong...that's what college partying will do!)

    Anyway, as a man, I do not like it when women refer to their spouse as their "hubby." I'm sure in most cases it's meant well, but in many it's not. I'm talking about the women who don't particular like their husbands (and I've talked to some of you so I know you're out there!)

    But either way, I find "hubby" to be a touch condescending as a man. I have a feeling most women would feel the same way if all of them were referred to as "wifey" in each instance.

    I realize most of you mean it as a term of endearment and it's shorter, but that doesn't mean it can't be nails on a chalkboard to me. Could I be the ONLY person that feels this way?

    (Let the flaming begin.....)

    Struggling to see what it has to do with you to be honest, providing you and your wife are happy. If putting posts on here get people to 'flame' is what rocks your boat though, well done you, a happy day for you.
  • sjohnny
    sjohnny Posts: 56,142 Member
    I prefer that my my old lady refer to me as "My Lord"
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    I call my husband my hubby quite a lot. Though usually when talking about him, rather than to him. I've never meant it in a negative way. He's the best!

    If I thought it bothered him I'd stop.
  • voluptas63
    voluptas63 Posts: 602 Member
    I wish that I had such free time to be concerned with such trivial BS.
  • NakedLunchTime
    NakedLunchTime Posts: 559
    I hate when women refer to them only as husband or boyfriend. They are not objects! When did they lose their names!! Are you so proud of having a man that you need to force it into every possible instance?! (And I feel the same way about 'wife' and 'girlfriend')

    FYI: I am a woman. I have a boyfriend. I call him by his name. Not "Let me ask the boyfriend". It's "Let me ask {name}"

    But, back to your original question. Yes, it annoys me when I hear people use 'hubby' all the time.

    I'm proud to refer to my husband as just that, husband. However I also use his real name all the time as well..Thats one of the fun parts of being married ...Saying that you have a husband :) ....and I don't use the word hubby but it doesn't bother me when people do.
  • edonald774
    edonald774 Posts: 92 Member
    But either way, I find "hubby" to be a touch condescending as a man. I have a feeling most women would feel the same way if all of them were referred to as "wifey" in each instance.

    this made me laugh as in Scotland we actually say "wifey", it's kind of like a friendly term for any older lady. We tend to say "the wee wifey"
  • glittermouse
    glittermouse Posts: 582 Member
    I hate when women refer to them only as husband or boyfriend. They are not objects! When did they lose their names!! Are you so proud of having a man that you need to force it into every possible instance?! (And I feel the same way about 'wife' and 'girlfriend')

    FYI: I am a woman. I have a boyfriend. I call him by his name. Not "Let me ask the boyfriend". It's "Let me ask {name}"

    But, back to your original question. Yes, it annoys me when I hear people use 'hubby' all the time.

    I guess it depends if the person you're talking to knows your boyfriend's name.
    If I tell you I'm having lunch with Cyrille, it could be my coworker, my husband, my boyfriend, my grown-up son, my boss,...
    Personally, I just think we should be calling people by their REAL name instead of labels, like "hubby" and "wifey."

    ^^THIS

    If I say something to someone who I am not very close with (a co-worker) who doesn't know I have a significant other, I wouldn't start talking about Taylor because they would have no idea who that is. I would say "boyfriend." My boyfriend is having a party this weekend.

    I agree with both of you. I guess that when that comes up, I always say something like. "So the other day, John--my boyfriend-- and I . . .Then John spills water everywhere and . . ." and from then on out always call my boyfriend by his name. I figure that after I've told them his name, they are smart enough to remember it and I'm not going to insult their intelligence/ gloat by saying "boyfriend" or "hubby" all the time.

    That being said--
    get over it, you aren't part of my relationship & I will refer to my hubby any way I want.

    --I agree with ^^ This 100%.
  • NakedLunchTime
    NakedLunchTime Posts: 559
    Silly. I've used it - I've used hubs - I've used husband - I've used *kitten* head - I've used "my penis" -

    - "so the hubs & I caught a movie.."
    - "WOMAN, it is your HUSBAND!"
    - "Yes, I'm quite aware of that."
    This is hilarious!! Im so using "my penis" when I get home!!! haha
  • auntdeedee87
    auntdeedee87 Posts: 706 Member
    You don't have to call me Darlin', Darlin'...
    You never even called me by my name.
  • summertime_girl
    summertime_girl Posts: 3,945 Member
    There are a lot of pet names I find obnoxious, but I don't really care what other people call their significant others.

    I'll take the head off someone who calls me "ma'am" though. Ugh. I never want to be a ma'am! I also hate Mrs. MyLastName. That is my crazy mother-in-law, not me.
  • kit_katty
    kit_katty Posts: 992 Member
    I see no issues with hubby, if I ever said it, it would be as an endearment. However, if any husband of mine didn't like it, I wouldn't call him that. Simple as that.
  • VeganInTraining
    VeganInTraining Posts: 1,319 Member
    I have never heard someone calling their hubby "hubby" in a condesending way. I signed my husband's christmas present "to: Hubby, Love, Wifey" ....and you're right it still can be like nails on a chalk board for you but my hubby seems to like it and he's the only man who's openion I care about :)
  • louisau
    louisau Posts: 159 Member
    Personally, I just think we should be calling people by their REAL name instead of labels, like "hubby" and "wifey."

    ^^THIS

    Totally agree
  • PegasusDeb
    PegasusDeb Posts: 665 Member
    I would much rather them being called "hubs" or "hubbie" then "sweetie" or "honey" While talking to one of my gr'friends she does that all the time & it makes me gag. She's newly married, so I hope it will wear off, but seriously, if I know he's within hearing distance, I will not call, for that reason alone. Now I have called my b'friend (when I had one!) "honey", but not much in public, it's usually by name. Maybe it's just the way she says it, sounds so condensending. On here though, who cares what he's called, I prefer hubs to DH. That seems stupid.
  • Katefab26
    Katefab26 Posts: 865
    I hate the word "hubby". I always have. It's on my list of top hated words, along with other words like supple, moist, etc.
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