Biting my tongue at seeing overweight children

kschhr

I understand that. However, I've also stated multiple times that I'm talking extreme cases. I've also stated that I think the parents should have time to try to get their child in a healthier state before the government steps in. People overlook the majority of what I say and just focus on what they don't want to hear.

I only questioned where the line is drawn. You say "extreme", but that is pretty vague. I prefer not to give that kind of "vague" authority to the gov't.

Again, I'm not writing up a proposal to government. If I was it would be MUCH more thought out than the random things I say on a forum.

Faye_Anderson

:noway: How DARE overweight people go out in public! I'm so sorry you had to look at that :sad:

We SERIOUSLY need a "like" button on here :happy:

mlemonroe2

Seriously...if Im in Target..and my 6 yr old who is 43lbs wants a donut and it keeps him from screaming for the hour Im in the store...by God..hes getting a stinking donut! lol

LOL!!! I have a 2 year old so I totally get that!

Some parents remove their children from such situations immediately rather than allowing them to learn that temper tantrums in public will get them what they want.

some children blah blah blah.. yeah you try taking a 2 year old to the post office while you wait in line to mail a package and they continue to run for the door and want to play... they scream and holler and throw fits do you lose your place in line to leave and mail the package later or do you take the sucker that the post office employee offers to calm him down?? hmmm, I take the sucker and it usually it works so the hell with you saying you can immediately leave when it comes to temper tantrums and let's see how it works out for you

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!! so my point!

timingsands

Listen...

We ALL judge.. we're human. I've looked at some of the kids i work with and say "Damn, i wanna run some of these kids up the stairs a couple of times" But then, i know what some of these kids eat... so i guess i can say some stuff...

Anyway, i digress... it's what u do with said judgement that makes u bad or acceptable.

Dont Gawk and stare and point over these strange kids... you dont know them AND they arent yours.

So quit worrying about them. U dont need to be feeling nauseous over them. Worry about you and hope they're parents know what they're doing.


SIDENOTE: but in truth tho... the portions in the US are MASSIVE. For example, the kids soda in the movie theatre is what we have as our adult medium, not to mention the largest sized popcorn here.. is your small..0_0 ... I do believe some parents need to teach their kids about control. It really isnt healthy. It really doesnt matter how much they cry and carry on about what their friends eat. If they are taught not to have certain things, they wont.

Yes, thank you! Great post. It seems some people forget that children are perceptive, and if you stare or shake your head or whisper to someone while looking in their direction, they will know why you are doing it and their feelings will be hurt.

kaleas

Let me tell ya something... LOL! I'd have had the same thoughts! Don't feel bad. Everybody judges everybody. I'm sure big people judge fit people all the time.... "...look at her, she thinks she's all that because she can wear a size 0, pshhhhhhh, she ain't got nothing on my lovely lady LUMPS!"

It is a SHAME that parents teach their kids to NOT have self control. That kid probably sensed your "disapproval" and made that face because she's been taught, "Eat up, honey! The more the better! Nevermind if you develop juvenile diabetes or are teased by kids, because you can squash them!"

**IF anybody is offended by what I say, that's too bad. I would think most of us MFP's are ALL for children's health.

I second this.

AGREE great response!

I only finally just came back to this. After reading through the posts, I'll probably take this one as my response.

As people on this site who deal with weight issues, you really should be more worried about the children of our next generation and the food that they're consuming, and growing up around. Incase you missed it, obesity has now become an epidemic. It is the number one health problem in our country.

Also I hoped I could transmit brainwaves to them, begging them to stop eating and care about their health now.

FearAnLoathing

:noway: How DARE overweight people go out in public! I'm so sorry you had to look at that :sad:

Uhh thats not at all what she said...Don't get all crazy & off topic. I agree with the original poster.

so you agree with the op that these children were so disgusting she wanted to throw up? because thats pretty much EXACTLY what she said.

sassylilmama

I like how judgey people can be since a good number of the people on this site have or had weight issues themselves.
If you need to bite your tounge when you see an overweight child maybe you should bite a little harder to not be such a judgemental ****
next time.

Yes! Thank you for saying this! For all of you that were overweight as kids and think its a good idea to remove kids from parents....what if that had been you?? How would you have felt being taken away from your parents?

galegetsthin

I'm sorry that the sight of fat people makes you sick to your stomach. The sight of uneducated mouth breathers having children also disgusts me.

Thank you for motivating me to write my congressman to pass a law taking away the children of mouth breathing cretins. Those poor children. Being raised to be intellectually devoid and emotionally raised to be cruel and vapid individuals...

O.o

You use the word "vapid" rather often. Was it on your Webster's word of the day calendar or something?

Hmm. Where else did I use the word "vapid"?

To be honest, I cant be totally sure. I *want* to say it was the "what do men want" topic..... But, I have read quite a few. I only remember because I thought it witty.

auticus

Fat people aren't human so it doesn't matter how fat children feel. AmIrite?

kschhr

I like how judgey people can be since a good number of the people on this site have or had weight issues themselves.
If you need to bite your tounge when you see an overweight child maybe you should bite a little harder to not be such a judgemental ****
next time.

Yes! Thank you for saying this! For all of you that were overweight as kids and think its a good idea to remove kids from parents....what if that had been you?? How would you have felt being taken away from your parents?

I was a fat child, and I'm the one everyone is arguing with.
Would I have understood at the time? No.
Do I wish someone had said SOMETHING to my parents to make it clear that they were feeding me the wrong foods? YES.

Elle_Jamaicangirl81

\My 3 year is better educated then that.
He dont throw tantrums in public places and he listens to me when I explain to him that he needs to settle down and he can have something healthier when we get home.
Its all in how we raise and educate our children in how its appropriate to behave.
If you wanna let your children walk all over you, thats your problem.

This!!!!!!

auticus

To be honest, I cant be totally sure. I *want* to say it was the "what do men want" topic..... But, I have read quite a few. I only remember because I thought it witty.

I'm a writer.

I may have used it once before but I don't recall. Sometimes I get stuck on a word so it's possible.

unifil

Since I am fat myself I watch out that my children don't get fat .... because I don't want them to go through stuff I had to.

raindropwishes

I'm confused at why so many people have gotten so offended at the OP, and commenting about stuff she didn't even say!

It makes me angry to see really fat kids, my little brother-in-law who's 7 is really obese and it makes me so angry because I know the damage it can cause. My partner was fed a poor diet and has been fat all her life, and she cries now about herself and her brother because she has serious issues now to do with self-esteem & also social issues.

Parents have the responsibility of looking after their children, making sure they're healthy and ok. There's nothing wrong with an odd treat, pizza here, mcdonalds there, whatever, but if a kid is massively fat then it's highly unlikely that those kids have been given a healthy diet.

I know a lady here in the UK who's had her 3 kids taken off her because she gave them so much junk food one of them ended up hospitalised with salt overdose. It's ridiculous the size of some kids these days.

\My 3 year is better educated then that.
He dont throw tantrums in public places and he listens to me when I explain to him that he needs to settle down and he can have something healthier when we get home.
Its all in how we raise and educate our children in how its appropriate to behave.
If you wanna let your children walk all over you, thats your problem.

This!!!!!!

yup!!

katcod1522

Seriously...if Im in Target..and my 6 yr old who is 43lbs wants a donut and it keeps him from screaming for the hour Im in the store...by God..hes getting a stinking donut! lol

LOL!!! I have a 2 year old so I totally get that!

Some parents remove their children from such situations immediately rather than allowing them to learn that temper tantrums in public will get them what they want.

some children blah blah blah.. yeah you try taking a 2 year old to the post office while you wait in line to mail a package and they continue to run for the door and want to play... they scream and holler and throw fits do you lose your place in line to leave and mail the package later or do you take the sucker that the post office employee offers to calm him down?? hmmm, I take the sucker and it usually it works so the hell with you saying you can immediately leave when it comes to temper tantrums and let's see how it works out for you

\My 3 year is better educated then that.
He dont throw tantrums in public places and he listens to me when I explain to him that he needs to settle down and he can have something healthier when we get home.
Its all in how we raise and educate our children in how its appropriate to behave.
If you wanna let your children walk all over you, thats your problem.

You obviously do not have a child with ADHD. Children are different. My two children are polar oposites of eachother. My dauther is calm, cool, collected. At 18 months old I knew I could take her to a funeral and her not tip the casket over. My son... well lets just say he's the demon child from hell who would not only have tipped the casket over but jumped into it and pretended it was a truck. You pick your battles, dude.

^5!!!!!!

stacyjbaker1010

I hope the mom isn't a member of MFP.

KayteeBear

First off bribing your child to be good by stuffing a donut in their face is NOT the way to get them to be good. I know, I'm not a parent so I don't truly understand what it is like to have a screamin 2 year old in the grocery store when I'm running on 3 hours of sleep BUT I still don't think it's right for parents to bribe their children with food to be good. That is not a good way to raise them because then they'll learn that every time they throw a tantrum they will get what they want. They need to learn they are not the boss and they do as mama/papa says.

my child is 2. she throws lots of tantrums. for the most part, i just let her, but when i'm in the store and its been a long day and i just need to get out of there, i bust out the cheerios or fruit snacks to keep her busy so i can get out of there. all i said was i understand how the person who gives her kid a doughnut feels. not that i give my kids cake all the time to make them behave. it's easy to think how you would react if you have kids and totally another story when you actually do. props to anyone who never gives their child a snack or toy to stop a screaming fit. It dosn't happen a lot, but it happens. No one is perfect, not even parents

I'm not saying it makes you (general you) a bad parent. I guess I should've clarified and said if it happens every day. I understand sometimes caving and that's okay. But when it's the first resort *all the time* that it's bad. Once in a while isn't.

FearAnLoathing

I like how judgey people can be since a good number of the people on this site have or had weight issues themselves.
If you need to bite your tounge when you see an overweight child maybe you should bite a little harder to not be such a judgemental ****
next time.

Yes! Thank you for saying this! For all of you that were overweight as kids and think its a good idea to remove kids from parents....what if that had been you?? How would you have felt being taken away from your parents?

I was a fat child, and I'm the one everyone is arguing with.
Would I have understood at the time? No.
Do I wish someone had said SOMETHING to my parents to make it clear that they were feeding me the wrong foods? YES.

So you wish someone had told your parents that the very sight of you made them want to puke,or would you have preffered to have been put in foster homes?

killagb

I like how judgey people can be since a good number of the people on this site have or had weight issues themselves.
If you need to bite your tounge when you see an overweight child maybe you should bite a little harder to not be such a judgemental ****
next time.

Yes! Thank you for saying this! For all of you that were overweight as kids and think its a good idea to remove kids from parents....what if that had been you?? How would you have felt being taken away from your parents?

I was a fat child, and I'm the one everyone is arguing with.
Would I have understood at the time? No.
Do I wish someone had said SOMETHING to my parents to make it clear that they were feeding me the wrong foods? YES.

Did they do anything that gave you a permanent condition? I'll go ahead and assume they didn't kill you.

ItsMeRebekah

I have a hard time believing that anybody is calming down a toddler having a tantrum by telling them they are going to provide “healthy” foods when you get home LOL

And side note, on top of all the people saying that they wouldn’t give the child the donut, I would like to also point out those are probably the same people who are giving you nasty dirty looks because you can’t “control” your child.

Have a heart that is full of love and respect for other people. Be it if they are “overweight” or “ugly” whatever doesn’t meet YOUR standards. Being loving and kind isn’t a hot topic around here ive noticed. “Voicing” opinions in rash cruel ways is much more popular..

Also, aren’t most people here for the exact same reasons? Lets us not cast stones at a glass house. We haven’t all been in the shoes of others.

katcod1522

I like how judgey people can be since a good number of the people on this site have or had weight issues themselves.
If you need to bite your tounge when you see an overweight child maybe you should bite a little harder to not be such a judgemental ****
next time.

Yes! Thank you for saying this! For all of you that were overweight as kids and think its a good idea to remove kids from parents....what if that had been you?? How would you have felt being taken away from your parents?

I was a fat child, and I'm the one everyone is arguing with.
Would I have understood at the time? No.
Do I wish someone had said SOMETHING to my parents to make it clear that they were feeding me the wrong foods? YES.

So you wish someone had told your parents that the very sight of you made them want to puke,or would you have preffered to have been put in foster homes?

*waits*

elenathegreat

So sad!! While your reaction seems a little extreeme, If you are in the US then your tax $ will likely be paying for the diseases they contract from such an unhealthy diet and lifestyle so you have some right to complain.

The complaint should be with the gov't taking the money and using it to pay for folks' poor decisions, not the individual.

Even if they have private insurance it would still affect all of us by driving up ins rates in general. And then there is the fact that the children are simply being mistreated. Childhood obesity is everyone's problem.

Can we agree, though, that calling someone out about it at a fast food place will not solve the problem?
How about calling someone out at a fast food while you are eating the stuff too, will not any problems?

Nattiejean57

Obviously I'm not sitting down drawing out a proposal to the feds, or else I would have answers for you. In short, I feel like something needs to be put in place to regulate this. It's not okay that people can kill their kids with food. Honestly, at a very young age (say 10 and under) maybe BMI is a good way to go about it. No child is going to have enough muscle on them to make the BMI scale so inaccurate that it would say a child is obese if they weren't. Or maybe when they hit that morbid obesity, give the parents a year to get the child to a healthy weight (time probably would change depending on how overweight the child is). I'm not trying to bully parents, just trying to say that it is abuse to feed them in such ways.

I feel that the mothers that have their kids all dolled up like *kitten* for those kiddie beauty pageants are terrible, and doing some serious damage to their kids. I will never call for them to be taken away though. it's a dangerous path when you call for gov't to intervene for anything beyond protecting kids from immediate physical harm. Once you give them some power, it is nearly impossible to take it back, or keep them from wanting more.

Gov't regulation is rarely the answer to any societal ills.

I agree like 10,000% on this!

herstrawberri

Here in the UK I'm pretty sure allowing your kids to get obese counts as child abuse and people have had their kids taken away as a result.

The US needs this, hardcore.

Really? The slope gets awfully slippery here, folks. Where is the line drawn? Spooky stuff, folks. Spooky.

Yes, really. If a child is on the verge of diabetes as a result of what the parents are feeding them, you don't think that's child abuse? That those parents are obviously not fit to raise children? Once the kid turns 18 they can do as they please. But while they're still young, still learning, still molding, parents need to teach their children good habits, not ones that will possibly kill them. Disorders that affect weight don't make people obese, just overweight.

Seriously??? And you are the expert HOW!!! I was an overweight child and my parents did everything they could to stop me from getting fatter. Did it work? Nope. I was still fat. So I should of been taken away from my parents because of MY habits?? How can you honestly say a child should be taken away from their parents? YES, maybe the parents should be given nutrition classes with the child but not taken away. This is complete ignorance.

auticus

I think it has something to do with people getting very angry at others for a myriad of things.

Do you like Obama? Then people are going to be very angry at you.
What about your religion? Yep. Guaranteed people will be very angry about whatever you answer there.

You want to make a difference with overweight kids? Be the example. Keep the judgement to thyself. Next up on the judgement block may be you for a number of reasons.

Also the statements being used are inflammatory, derrogative, and highly insulting. There is a difference between "I think that overweight children need to adjust their diet" to "It disgusts me".

Note "you" is a general term, not any one person in particular.

Jessamin

I won't argue your right to judge in your head, because you're going to do it whether I think you're a terrible person or not.

The fact that you watched these kids long and hard enough to write such a detailed paragraph is a concern to me. The fact that you're so thoroughly disgusted by these CHILDREN is a concern to me. If you were a fat kid, you know how quickly you can tell someone is staring at you and judging you. You probably made these kids feel like **** because their parent/s may or may not make bad decisions for them. Well done.

Nattiejean57

I hope the mom isn't a member of MFP.

Agreed!

CaptainGordo

I was a fat child, and I'm the one everyone is arguing with.
Would I have understood at the time? No.
Do I wish someone had said SOMETHING to my parents to make it clear that they were feeding me the wrong foods? YES.

I would hope that we can agree that a random stranger making a comment would not have done anything to help. Also, the gov't has had guidelines around for decades, and most people that are able to drive and raise kids know what is healthy and what is not. No amount of being told what to do will make someone do anything.

Like the old saying says, "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink."

kschhr

I like how judgey people can be since a good number of the people on this site have or had weight issues themselves.
If you need to bite your tounge when you see an overweight child maybe you should bite a little harder to not be such a judgemental ****
next time.

Yes! Thank you for saying this! For all of you that were overweight as kids and think its a good idea to remove kids from parents....what if that had been you?? How would you have felt being taken away from your parents?

I was a fat child, and I'm the one everyone is arguing with.
Would I have understood at the time? No.
Do I wish someone had said SOMETHING to my parents to make it clear that they were feeding me the wrong foods? YES.

So you wish someone had told your parents that the very sight of you made them want to puke,or would you have preffered to have been put in foster homes?

How about instead of turning my words into something I did NOT say, just read them for what they are? I wish my parents were made aware, yes. I wish that if they had been made aware and did not change what they were doing that I would have been put into a better home where this would not have happened, yes. My brother is over 400lbs and has knee problems due to him being overweight as a young child. I think parents should be held responsible for their child's health problems (WEIGHT-RELATED, before anyone flips out at this statement)

mlemonroe2

First off bribing your child to be good by stuffing a donut in their face is NOT the way to get them to be good. I know, I'm not a parent so I don't truly understand what it is like to have a screamin 2 year old in the grocery store when I'm running on 3 hours of sleep BUT I still don't think it's right for parents to bribe their children with food to be good. That is not a good way to raise them because then they'll learn that every time they throw a tantrum they will get what they want. They need to learn they are not the boss and they do as mama/papa says.

my child is 2. she throws lots of tantrums. for the most part, i just let her, but when i'm in the store and its been a long day and i just need to get out of there, i bust out the cheerios or fruit snacks to keep her busy so i can get out of there. all i said was i understand how the person who gives her kid a doughnut feels. not that i give my kids cake all the time to make them behave. it's easy to think how you would react if you have kids and totally another story when you actually do. props to anyone who never gives their child a snack or toy to stop a screaming fit. It dosn't happen a lot, but it happens. No one is perfect, not even parents

I'm not saying it makes you (general you) a bad parent. I guess I should've clarified and said if it happens every day. I understand sometimes caving and that's okay. But when it's the first resort *all the time* that it's bad. Once in a while isn't.

I agree with you. There have been quite a few people being harsh to me becasue i said i understood what the other poster was talking about when she said she would give her kid a doughnut in target to make them be quite. Just becasue someone says that, dosn't mean we can assume it's something that happens all the time. People are so quick to judge other people just by a few words they post in a forum. I guess I should just stop looking in them!