What I've learned from the MFP forums

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  • killagb
    killagb Posts: 3,280 Member
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    I have learned alot (mostly that spelling alot the wrong way pisses certain people off). Pregnant urine aka the Hcg diet will make me uber skinny in a short amount of time all the while making me fat in the process. I've also learned that I'm a bad person for wearing makeup to the gym on Monday's when clearly Monday' are no makeup days.
    How does one go about impregnating urine? Do I really want to know?
  • EmCarroll1990
    EmCarroll1990 Posts: 2,849 Member
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    That a ream of paper weighs 10lbs, and a 10lb dumbell is heavier than a 10lb bag of feathers. And a discussion about this will be longer than 20 pages. THAT was a fun one!

    Dang it! I must have missed that one.
  • Teliooo
    Teliooo Posts: 725 Member
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    Eating before bed makes you fat
    Eating carbs makes you fat
    Eating too much protein makes you fat
    Eating makes you fat. You know what? Let's all just stop eating.

    This.

    and you should not eat your exercise calories back as you will sabotage yourself and get fatter. Even though the site already gives you a deficit to lose weight, you need to create more deficit by burning all of your calories.
  • samantha64118
    samantha64118 Posts: 71
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    Oh, annnd that if your food journal isn't public then you must be doing naughty things and eating horribly.
  • iuangina
    iuangina Posts: 691 Member
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    diet coke doesn't count as water, even if I drink it while masturbating.
  • brittanyjeanxo
    brittanyjeanxo Posts: 1,831 Member
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    I have also learned that throwing a 24 pound baby in the air = good lifting progress. Also hold it while you're doing squats.
  • jhartram
    jhartram Posts: 165
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    *kitten* is a healthy part of your exercise routine.

    Should I log that and for how many calories??

    According to Webster's Online Dictionary:

    Definition of CALISTHENICS
    1: systematic rhythmic bodily exercises performed usually without apparatus

    I'm doing it wrong....

    It says USUALLY without apparatus... remember, this definition was written before the wonderful variety we enjoy today existed! Life is so much better now... LOL

    sssooo since I have an apparatus can I log more calories??

    I'm not sure... I'm thinking it'll take extensive research with a HRM... and I mean EXTENSIVE!! hehe
  • sweet110
    sweet110 Posts: 332 Member
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    Since I've lost 85 pounds, everything I say is right.
    Since I've lost 5 pounds, everything I say is right.
    Since I did all these things and didn't lose a pound, I can tell you that everything I've tried is bogus.
    I am right. You are wrong. And dangerous. And not taking this seriously. And are a horrible, horrible person.

    Thank you, and goodnight.
  • mamaw53
    mamaw53 Posts: 71
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    Just because you want to be held accountable and have others give you a nudge, don't assume others do. I once had someone get VERY offended because I told her I missed her and asked if she had been busy (that is why I usually fail to log on for extended days). She was so upset she told me that she didn't like my comment and then un-friended me! Ouch!
  • sanjoparolas
    sanjoparolas Posts: 557 Member
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    Lots of funny stuff here. I've learned from forums in general that regular people are much more interesting and creative and rude and confused and crazy and wise and all kinda stuff than I expect. I'm new on this forum and don't post to any much, but I find the tone on MFP to be generally kind. Thanks for this thread!
  • jeffarthur
    jeffarthur Posts: 123 Member
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    *kitten* is a healthy part of your exercise routine.
    aha! so that's why I've hit a plateau! Niiiiice
  • dls06
    dls06 Posts: 6,774 Member
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    If you put "want friends" in the post you will not get a lot of hits. :cry:

    If you put something "sexual" in the post it will go on for days:glasses:

    If you say "carbs or protein" you will start a fight:grumble:

    People don't "really" want to here the truth:noway:

    If your a guy and looking for attention, "Take your shirt off":yawn:
  • Ebwash89
    Ebwash89 Posts: 180 Member
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    Eating before bed makes you fat
    Eating carbs makes you fat
    Eating too much protein makes you fat
    Eating makes you fat. You know what? Let's all just stop eating.

    ^^^Agree with this^^ lol.... And Frozen vegetables and meat are good for you but frozen meals are suicide! :ohwell:
  • Teliooo
    Teliooo Posts: 725 Member
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    Oh and your diary SHOULD be public. Otherwise you are not committed to losing weight and you should not be on here.

    You have to have a HRM as these are the only way to correctly count your calories lost. They are definitely 100% correct.
  • bzmom
    bzmom Posts: 1,332 Member
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    If you miss your anabolic window you will die...

    sex burns as much caloreis as mowing the lawn (however never got answered if they used a push mower or one you ride..)

    Pegnant woman pee can aid in weightloss (I should have saved my pee from my pregnancy of my 2 yr old I could have been rich by now)
  • saritabandita
    saritabandita Posts: 67 Member
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    Pooping is a good way to lose weight.
  • andreacord
    andreacord Posts: 928
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    -Vegetables don't count as calories
    -Batman is not a superhero
    -Oatmeal and bread are going to make me fat
    -I'm a slob if I don't wear tight workout clothes or makeup to the gym
    -I'm prissy if I do the above
    -Eating paper will keep you full
    -Tomatoes are cancerous.

    Yeah, weird things on here.
  • princessputz
    princessputz Posts: 283 Member
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    I have learned alot (mostly that spelling alot the wrong way pisses certain people off). Pregnant urine aka the Hcg diet will make me uber skinny in a short amount of time all the while making me fat in the process. I've also learned that I'm a bad person for wearing makeup to the gym on Monday's when clearly Monday' are no makeup days.
    How does one go about impregnating urine? Do I really want to know?

    That's a whole new topic ;)
  • OSC_ESD
    OSC_ESD Posts: 752 Member
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    That when people get bored they start forums asking to say something obvious about the person above them ! But yet the person who started the forum has nobody above them ! Gotta love it !

    I have also learned there are a lot of wonderful people on here that have taught me soooo much about health and fitness ! The people who want to make a difference ... certainly do ! I have seen so many lives changed just by the support alone on this site ... it truly is incredible ! Ok ok ... back to the humor ...

    I have learned that an apple is good for you ... but only if you eat it before 2pm ! ROTFLMAO ! :laugh:
  • bzmom
    bzmom Posts: 1,332 Member
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    you forgot to add the high heals for the gym
    -Vegetables don't count as calories
    -Batman is not a superhero
    -Oatmeal and bread are going to make me fat
    -I'm a slob if I don't wear tight workout clothes or makeup to the gym
    -I'm prissy if I do the above
    -Eating paper will keep you full
    -Tomatoes are cancerous.

    Yeah, weird things on here.
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