husbands...

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  • hillarygullett
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    GEEEZZZZ. you people really know how to make a mountain of a mole hill! Never said a bad word about the guy. Don't think he's a monster, cause Just like you: DON'T KNOW HIM!!!! That was my only point. You don't know him. You weren't there for the conversation. All we knew from original post was she was upset.

    To OP: I know you love your husband, as I do mine! He doesn't always say the best thing, but he always tries! I'm glad you talked it out with him. Best wishes to you both. :flowerforyou:
  • turningstar
    turningstar Posts: 393 Member
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    I cannot believe there are 8 pages on this topic.

    And I can't believe im responding to the forums AGAIN.
  • MassiveDelta
    MassiveDelta Posts: 3,311 Member
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    I cannot believe there are 8 pages on this topic.

    And I can't believe im responding to the forums AGAIN.

    You clearly need an intervention. Has your husband told you what a horrible person you are for being on the forums again? If not he should.
  • klb620
    klb620 Posts: 28 Member
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    WOWZA!!!!!!!

    I'm thinking that I should stick with just the tools on this site and NOT try to find support/advice from such a judgemental group!

    I don't have ANYBODY in real life to talk to about my weightloss journey, or even vent about my frustrations that come aalong with it. I guess this isn't the place either!

    When I posted that my husband frustrates me sometimes, I said it with a smile on my face, even added an 'LOL' in there, I was not bashing!!!

    I didn't realize that there were people out there (maybe stepford wifes??? ;-) ) that have perfect marriages and never get frustrated with their husband.
  • slk1954
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    Well, I think it's best not to talk to the men about our weight loss because they never say what we want to hear. They don't have a clue what we want to hear. They are mostly consumed in their own little world of turmoil and woes. However, as long as they are not putting you down, or making you feel worse about yourself, or purposely sabotaging your efforts, really who cares what they have to say about our weight loss. It's our journey to walk. We love them but, ladies, we want them to notice when we've reached our goals and look like a "bomb" in that new little red dress. Then if they don't say what we want to hear they are foolish, foolish, foolish. I live with a runner, he has 2% body fat, runs 8-10 miles a day and knows the importance of being physically fit in order to enjoy life to it's fullest. I just want to show him that I can be right there with him. I may never run with him, because I just don't like running, but I know I can look and feel as good as he does, and I enjoy the fact that my weight loss is sneaking up on him. One day he'll do a double-take and wonder just when in the hell it happened. I'll just smile and have no response just as he's had none during my weight-loss journey.
  • hillarygullett
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    WOWZA!!!!!!!

    I'm thinking that I should stick with just the tools on this site and NOT try to find support/advice from such a judgemental group!

    I don't have ANYBODY in real life to talk to about my weightloss journey, or even vent about my frustrations that come aalong with it. I guess this isn't the place either!

    When I posted that my husband frustrates me sometimes, I said it with a smile on my face, even added an 'LOL' in there, I was not bashing!!!

    I didn't realize that there were people out there (maybe stepford wifes??? ;-) ) that have perfect marriages and never get frustrated with their husband.

    Thank you!!!
  • liroez29
    liroez29 Posts: 221
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    I think this is a touchy subject for men, if they say your doing great, you think they are just saying what you want to hear, if they say don't worry about it we think they don't care, if they say work harder we think they are ashamed or not proud of us. Kind of a loose, loose for a man! Best thing he could probably say is you just do your best and that is all you can do, but even better is we just don't put them in that position! If I tell my husband what I have done workout wise, I usually just get a "nice" or "good job". If I say I didn't work out and I feel bad about it, he usually says something to the effect of "Your still doing great, just work out tomorrow" he usually doesn't stray from these responses anymore! lol
  • slk1954
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    @ klb620 - Honey, don't worry about what those negative ninnies have to say, there are folks out here listening to you. I just wrote a long post that you might enjoy. Keep up your journey and know that you're not alone in your walk. There are more husbands out there not listening than there are those who are. We know that about men by now. Do it for yourself and don't worry about the lack of input. He'll notice later, believe me, he'll notice. :wink:
  • jazzalea
    jazzalea Posts: 412 Member
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    WOWZA!!!!!!!

    I'm thinking that I should stick with just the tools on this site and NOT try to find support/advice from such a judgemental group!

    I don't have ANYBODY in real life to talk to about my weightloss journey, or even vent about my frustrations that come aalong with it. I guess this isn't the place either!

    When I posted that my husband frustrates me sometimes, I said it with a smile on my face, even added an 'LOL' in there, I was not bashing!!!

    I didn't realize that there were people out there (maybe stepford wifes??? ;-) ) that have perfect marriages and never get frustrated with their husband.


    You said yourself that you were seeking support AND advice..... when you didn't hear what you wanted from your partner who knows you and loves you....... you turned to us and we who have BEEN THERE told you to listen to your husband.........



    To hear advice you need to be willing to listen:wink:

    P.S. I had the partner from hell until I learned to listen to what he was saying rather than on insist he learn what I WANTED him to say....
  • klb620
    klb620 Posts: 28 Member
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    Actually, I said I wanted to vent to my husband, I was not nor do I ever ask his advice, i KNOW HIM WELL ENOUGH TO KNOW THAT IT WILL GET UNDER MY SKIN....... so I turn to women who are like me, and have the same issues as me.....but whatever.
    WOWZA!!!!!!!

    I'm thinking that I should stick with just the tools on this site and NOT try to find support/advice from such a judgemental group!

    I don't have ANYBODY in real life to talk to about my weightloss journey, or even vent about my frustrations that come aalong with it. I guess this isn't the place either!

    When I posted that my husband frustrates me sometimes, I said it with a smile on my face, even added an 'LOL' in there, I was not bashing!!!

    I didn't realize that there were people out there (maybe stepford wifes??? ;-) ) that have perfect marriages and never get frustrated with their husband.


    You said yourself that you were seeking support AND advice..... when you didn't hear what you wanted from your partner who knows you and loves you....... you turned to us and we who have BEEN THERE told you to listen to your husband.........



    To hear advice you need to be willing to listen:wink:
  • wrevhn
    wrevhn Posts: 864 Member
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    I think this is a touchy subject for men, if they say your doing great, you think they are just saying what you want to hear, if they say don't worry about it we think they don't care, if they say work harder we think they are ashamed or not proud of us. Kind of a loose, loose for a man! Best thing he could probably say is you just do your best and that is all you can do, but even better is we just don't put them in that position! If I tell my husband what I have done workout wise, I usually just get a "nice" or "good job". If I say I didn't work out and I feel bad about it, he usually says something to the effect of "Your still doing great, just work out tomorrow" he usually doesn't stray from these responses anymore! lol


    btw, i love your ticker and pics dear, you rock.
  • katmix
    katmix Posts: 296 Member
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    Actually, I said I wanted to vent to my husband, I was not nor do I ever ask his advice, i KNOW HIM WELL ENOUGH TO KNOW THAT IT WILL GET UNDER MY SKIN....... so I turn to women who are like me, and have the same issues as me.....but whatever.
    WOWZA!!!!!!!

    I'm thinking that I should stick with just the tools on this site and NOT try to find support/advice from such a judgemental group!

    I don't have ANYBODY in real life to talk to about my weightloss journey, or even vent about my frustrations that come aalong with it. I guess this isn't the place either!

    When I posted that my husband frustrates me sometimes, I said it with a smile on my face, even added an 'LOL' in there, I was not bashing!!!

    I didn't realize that there were people out there (maybe stepford wifes??? ;-) ) that have perfect marriages and never get frustrated with their husband.


    You said yourself that you were seeking support AND advice..... when you didn't hear what you wanted from your partner who knows you and loves you....... you turned to us and we who have BEEN THERE told you to listen to your husband.........



    To hear advice you need to be willing to listen:wink:



    @klb: I'm sure it is a miscommunication in your posts, but in reading them - I'm not understanding what you're saying. You say have no one in 'real life' to talk to, so you choose to put your personal life out there on the internet for strangers to roll their eyes at, slap their forwards, and make derogatory remarks about. How is that helpful?

    As far as judgmental Stepford wives, I haven't heard any of these gals on today's forum (or myself) claim to have a perfect marriage, perfect husbands, or even to be perfect ourselves. I think sometimes it is easy to assume that because someone isn't complaining - that they don't have any complications in their personal lives...but as someone on the board today already stated, the best person to hash out any issues with - is the other person in the relationship. I would add...or your therapist!

    I got even more confused when I read your last statement about not wanting to ask hubby's advice about anything, but rather you wanted to vent to him. I don't know how long you've been married, and I certainly can't speak for your relationship. However, I know that my hubby LOVES to be sought out for his (yes, intelligent!) advice (and I dare say most of us feel the same way), and he would rather I didn't use him as a girlfriend and vent to him - but treat him as my lover, with the same respect that I showed when I was dating him.

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  • liroez29
    liroez29 Posts: 221
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    I think this is a touchy subject for men, if they say your doing great, you think they are just saying what you want to hear, if they say don't worry about it we think they don't care, if they say work harder we think they are ashamed or not proud of us. Kind of a loose, loose for a man! Best thing he could probably say is you just do your best and that is all you can do, but even better is we just don't put them in that position! If I tell my husband what I have done workout wise, I usually just get a "nice" or "good job". If I say I didn't work out and I feel bad about it, he usually says something to the effect of "Your still doing great, just work out tomorrow" he usually doesn't stray from these responses anymore! lol


    btw, i love your ticker and pics dear, you rock.

    Aw, thank you so much!
  • DanielleWatson83
    DanielleWatson83 Posts: 139 Member
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    shoot the xbox! i have a man that is a xbox aholic
  • cabaray
    cabaray Posts: 971 Member
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    WOWZA!!!!!!!

    I'm thinking that I should stick with just the tools on this site and NOT try to find support/advice from such a judgemental group!

    I don't have ANYBODY in real life to talk to about my weightloss journey, or even vent about my frustrations that come aalong with it. I guess this isn't the place either!

    When I posted that my husband frustrates me sometimes, I said it with a smile on my face, even added an 'LOL' in there, I was not bashing!!!

    I didn't realize that there were people out there (maybe stepford wifes??? ;-) ) that have perfect marriages and never get frustrated with their husband.
    I think that status postings for your friends to see are a better place to vent frustrations. You control who is on your friends list. Choose supportive friends and you should be fine doing that. The forums are a dog-eat-dog world. You can get a lot of great advice on the forums, but there are a lot of *kitten* (who I really enjoy by the way, *kitten* is a term of endearment for me).